September 2019 – Page 2

Cannibalism The New Psychological Weapon of War.

I’m sorry to say I made a Promise before I knew if I could Honor it, and Thats My Impulsiveness getting the better of Me. The Car Accident-Arrest Incident I said I would be Posting Today isn’t going to Materialize I’m Afraid to Say.

Unfortunately in Addition to the Car Totaling Accident-Arrest Yesterday We have been an Increasingly Heated Dispute with Our shitty fucking Neighbors. You see a Tree of Theirs fell across the Property line and fucked up My Fence. We’ve been Dead Locked in an increasingly Stressful Stand Off of Who’s Gonna Pay to Fix the Damage. Today the Stand Off turned into a Shit Show Show Down and thats Putting it Mildly. The Bottom Line: At this point I may have Lost the Battle, BUT I’m Winning the War believe You Me. I haven’t even begun to fucking Fight this Happy Horseshit to It’s Bitter End.

The Shit Show Show Down Aside I’m a hell of a lot more Banged the fuck Up from the Accident which Happens when You’re involved in a 55 mile Per Hour Collision. Bottom Line: I’m fucking Physically and Mentally fucking Exhausted. I’ve been constantly on the fucking Phone with Insurance Companies to the point of Insanity. Not to Mention I’m a fuck load More Sore than I thought Initially, But that was Just the Adrenaline Masking all that Bullshit.

Point 1. Sorry to say Today’s scheduled Post Titled “We’re The Worst Superheroes in History” will not be Posted as Promised Previously. It will be Posted ASAP as the Initial Shit Storm Here Subsides, and I can clear My fucking Head for a Moment.

BUT FEAR NOT DEAR READERS!!! I WILL NOT LEAVE YOU HANGING!!!

Point 2. I was saving this for a Rainy Day, But yeah Shit Happens So. One of the Longest Fascinations I have had in My Life is CANNIBALISM. Why is Eating a Fellow Human One of if Not the Number One Taboo? From The Extensive History of Cannibalism in Fuji to the Necro Cannibalism of the Fore Tribe from Papua New Guinea I can seem to Learn enough about Cannibalism. Some might say I have a Ravenous Appetite for the Morbid, but Hey fuck them.

What had most recently Renewed My Curiosity in Cannibalism was the Reports coming Out of Modern Day Africa where War Lords and Waring Factions had WEAPONIZED CANNIBALISM thus Creating a Brand New Weapon in Psychological Warfare. I heard Reports from Various and Numerous New Sources, YET the One of the Best Reports I came across was Vice’s Documentary “The Cannibal Warlords of Liberia”.

If Your Not Familiar with Vice, Their Television Network or News Show on HBO well then You should seriously go Google the Hell Out of Them. Enjoy.

Thanks for Reading/Viewing,

Brought To You By Les Sober

This Wasn’t Planned

I was planning on writing Today’s Post to give Our Reader’s a Heads Up that We were going on a Road Trip because it is Time. What Time you may be asking Yourself?! Well it’s one of those Times in Life when You just simply need To Get Away from All the Usual Bullshit in Life. A Time to Leave all the Happy Horseshit in the Rearview Mirror to Stretch One’s Leg while Getting a Change of Scenery.

I was going to say that New Posts may be scarce while We were going to be on the Road, BUT Alas I’m sitting at Our Home Office writing this Post instead.

We were on the Way to Board Our 4 Big Dogs and Little did We know one Hell of a fucked up Story was about to Suddenly Unfolded front of Our Eyes. It started with a Car Totaling Accident, and Ended with Several Felons getting Caught and Subsequently Arrested. It is truly one of the Strangest fucking Stories I have ever had the Unpleasant Privilege to be a Part of.

SO since the Trip has been Postponed due to the Fact it was Our Car that was Totaled (and Yes of course the Assholes We ran into Their Vehicle didn’t get a single fucking scratch) We Now have to Stay fucking put and Deal with the Insurance Shit/Buying a New Car before We can hit the Road Again.

THUS I will be Posting the Story, with Actual Accident Scene Photos, in It’s ENTIRETY Tomorrow, and I assure You it is a Story thats GUARANTEED to Utterly Blow Your fucking Mind.

Until Tomorrow I will sit here and Continue to Lick My Wounds as They Say.

Thanks for Reading,

By Les Sober

Lee Jonitis:Professional People Watcher (41/365)

Without saying another word Dizzy went bounding up the Stairs towards the Unresponsive Junkie. Once He reached the Junkie he shoved Him to one side and as the Junkie slumped to the right Dizzy literally stepped over the Junkies shoulder. Dizzy took a second to light a cigarette before placing His boot between the Junkie’s shoulder Blades, and shoved Him unceremoniously down the flight of Stairs.

The Junkie came tumbling down Ass over Elbows in a Flurry of Flailing Limbs finally hitting the Landing were Lee was standing. The Junkie lay there in a crumpled pile like a Wad of Chewed Up Bubble Gum. Lee frozen momentarily in Shock as He stared down at the Junkie wondering what the fuck He should do about it. Lee definitely wasn’t about to call the fucking Cops that’s for sure They’d just give Dizzy and Him a Hard Time Hassling Them Unnecessarily because They weren’t Happy about cleaning Up and After a Scummy Junkie. Lee did wonder if He should at least call 911 and have some Medical Professionals handle it. Lee also wasn’t sure if He Should He say anything and just continue to follow Dizzy to His Apartment?!

“If You’re afraid He’s Dead check His pulse or see if He’s still breathing. I assure You He’s fucking Fine.” Dizzy said with total confidence. Lee glanced up at Dizzy who was leisurely taking Prolonged drags of His Cigarette with an air of Boredom.

Lee landed over and gingerly took hold of one of the Junkies wrists and was relieved to feel a Pulse and Not a Fresh Corpse. The Junkie suddenly let out a Low and Hollow Moan that startled the hell out of Lee and made Him Jump back away from the Junkie’s contorted body that lay only a few feet from Him. Lee could hear Dizzy Laughing deeply as if He had just heard the funniest fucking Joke ever Told. Lee shot Dizzy a “Fuck You” Scowl as He failed to find the Humor in the Situation.

“I fucking TOLD YOU, I told You He was Fit as a Fiddle. A Dope Addicted Fiddle that just fell Head long down a Flight of Stairs it’s a bit fucked up but Fine in General.” Dizzy Said with a Calm Confidence.

Lee slid past the Battered Body of the Junkie and resumed His Journey to Dizzy’s Apartment. Lee was annoyed that Dizzy hadn’t given Him any sort of Heads Up about the Living Conditions located in the Confines of This Skid Row Style Hotel. Lee didn’t harbor any Empathy for the Junkie He just wish He had been made aware so He wouldn’t have to worry about being fucked with by the Cops or Possible Arrested Himself. Thats the exact kind of bullshit He didn’t need in His life Lee kept telling Himself over and over again in His Head until He realized Dizzy was Still Talking as They went.

“You want to know HOW I knew that Junkie fuck was just Fine and Dandy? I’ll tell You it’s quite simple You see it like a Car Crash. If your about to inevitable be in an Auto Accident They say the Best thing to do is Go Limp. Which goes against EVERY Natural Instinct for Self Preservation instilled in Humans since Day One. If You try and Brace Yourself say by putting Your Hands on the Dashboard all Your guaranteeing is if You live that You’ll have Two fucking Broken Arms.”said Dizzy in a Tone of Voice that reminded Lee of an Educational TV Show Narrator.

“Thats some seriously fucked up Real Life Shit right there.” respond Lee flatly as He still hand’t fully come to grips with the whole Junkie incident, and was currently wondering what Other Oddities way lay in wait. Lee generally didn’t give a flying fuck about Anything as long as He knew what it was or what was going On that was all. It seemed like a normal request to Him at any rate.

“It’s like when Your watching one of those Extreme Skiers who attempt to Ski down some insane Monstrous Mountains at a fucking 65 degree angel and shit, and then They wipe the fuck out falling Hundreds to Thousands of Feet as You watch Them Flopping around like a Rag Doll. It’s the exact same Principle since initially the Skier is knocked out and thus goes completely Limp. It’s the only way Any of those crazy motherfuckers can do that shit without Dying when They Fall.” said Dizzy ignoring Lee’s suddenly sullen mood.

Be Sure To Tune in for Next Weeks Lactose Intolerant Installment of………

LEE JONITIS: PROFESSIONAL PEOPLE WATCHER (42/365)

Thanks for Reading,

By Les Sober (12:33 am)

Homicidal History: The Louisiana Axeman

This is the ACTUAL LETTER from Serial Killer The Louisiana Axeman that was Published in Newspapers on March 13, 1919 with The Axeman’s Ultimatum for Murder. Enjoy.

The Axeman’s Letter:

Hell, March 13, 1919

Esteemed Mortal of New Orleans: The Axeman

They have never caught me and they never will. They have never seen me, for I am invisible, even as the ether that surrounds your earth. I am not a human being, but a spirit and a demon from the hottest hell. I am what you Orleanians and your foolish police call the Axeman.

When I see fit, I shall come and claim other victims. I alone know whom they shall be. I shall leave no clue except my bloody axe, besmeared with blood and brains of he whom I sent below to keep me company.

If you wish you may tell the police to be careful not to rile me. Of course, I am a reasonable spirit. I take no offense at the way they have conducted their investigations in the past. In fact, they have been so utterly stupid as to not only amuse me, but His Satanic majesty, Francis Josef, etc. But tell them too beware. Let them not try to discover what I am, for it were better that they were never born than to incur the wrath of the Axeman. I don’t think there is any need of such a warning, for I feel sure the police will always dodge me, as they have in the past. They are wise and know how to keep away from all harm.

Undoubtedly, you Orleanians think of me as a most horrible murderer, which I am, but I could be much worse if I wanted to. If I wished, I could pay a visit to your city every night. At will I could slay thousands of your best citizens (and the worst), for I am in close relationship with the Angel of Death.

Now, to be exact, at 12:15 (earthly time) on the next Tuesday night, I am going to passover New Orleans. In my infant mercy , I am going to make a little proposition to you people. Here it is:

I am very fond of jazz music, and I swear by all the devils in the other regions that every person shall be spared in whose home a jazz band is in full swing at the time I have just mentioned. If everyone has a jazz band going, well, then, so much the better for you people. One thing is Certain and that is that some of your people who do not jazz it out on that specific Tuesday night (if there be any) will get the axe.

Well, as I am cold and crave the warmth of my native Tartarus, and it is about time I leave your earthly home, I will cease my discourse. Hoping that thou wilt publish this, that it may go well with thee, I have been, am and will be the worst spirit that ever existed either in fact or realm of fancy.

–The Axeman

Thanks for Reading,

Presented by Les Sober

Davey on Acid and The Friendly Ass Biter

It was a Mildly Pleasant Summer Day in Suburban Hell when I met up with My partner in Crime Armenian who just so happened to have some Seriously Intense LSD. Since there was never anything to do (which explains all the Drug Use) in Our Tiny Town so We had to be Creative.

On this Day Armenian and I decided to visit an Acquaintance of Ours named Davey. I say acquaintance since We weren’t actually Friends, but We knew each other because We moved in the same Social Circles. I expressed the interest in seeing what Davey would be like on Acid, and thus Our Plan for the Day materialized. I called Davey who was Home and had nothing in particular to do and had No Objection to Hanging Out. Armenian and I then rode Our Dirt Bikes over to Davey’s since We had Our Driver’s Licenses, BUT Neither of Us had a Car.

We showed up at Davey’s a little after Noon to find Him tooling around on His Skateboard in His Driveway. We loitered in the Driveway contemplating what the fuck to do Next since We were in the Possession of Intense LSD, and Davey’s Parents were Home. We didn’t want to Drop Acid at Davey’s thats for fucking sure. There is nothing more awkwardly fucked up than having to Deal with Your or a Friends Parents while Your Tripping Face.

Again not have a Car impeded Our Prospects greatly to say the least. In the End We did the Only thing We could think of because the other issue at Hand was We were all Broke as Hell, and that was to take a Walk. With Our plan now in place We took the Acid, and made Our way to the Woods that bordered Davey’s Neighborhood since it was Secluded. The last thing We wanted was to be aimlessly wondering the Streets were We were vulnerable and could run into other People like Davey’s Neighbor’s, Assholes from Our High School, The Pissy Police, Little Kids, Pets, the Elderly, and Landscapers for example.

By the time We had leisurely strolled over to the Woods the Acid was beginning to kick in Big Time. The disassociating of Reality and Distortion of Time started to Set in along with the Nervous Excitement for the Hallucinatory Adventure ahead of Us. We haphazardly made Our way to a small clearing in the Woods that was utilized by The Teens of Town for Underage Drinking and Smoking Pot. Once We reached the Clearing thats exactly what We did We smoked several joints as the Acid took Full Effect.

We collectively made the Decision that We should leave the Clearing before some other Partiers Showed up. We thought it be best to head down to the near by Creek, Yet We were having a Great Deal of Trouble Locating it as Hallucinations made it Hard to get One’s bearings as You might imagine. After stumbling around and over one another We located a Path (at least at the Time it appeared to be a Path) and figured We were Lost because We hadn’t remember there was in fact a Path We could follow that would lead Us down to the Creek We were seeking for So Diligently.

As We were walking along I pulled a Bur (one of thoseCircular fuckers with all the Prongs) off of My Pant Leg. Armenian who was walking beside Me informed Me I had come in Contact with an Ass Biter. At that point I asked the Only Pertinent question Asking if said Ass Biter was Friendly or Hostile?! To My relief Armenian respond by saying that the Ass Biter in question was indeed Friendly. I looked and saw Davey walking a good bit ahead of Us and still mulling the Bur over between My fingers I thought it be absolutely fucking Hilarious to Toss the Bur at Davey.

Once I lobbed the Bur at Davey I yelled “FRIENDLY ASS BITER!” to for Shits and Giggles. Now I don’t know where Davey’s Head was at the moment I threw the Newly Dubbed Friendly Ass Biter at Him, BUT I think it was Safe to assume He wasn’t in a good Head Space. As soon as I made My Exclamation Davey turned to Look at Me and then took off as Fast as His fucking Feet could take Him off the Path and headlong into the Woods. Armenian and I called after Him letting Him know it was a Joke and He wasn’t in any danger at all, Yet Davey couldn’t be dissuaded and just kept Hauling Ass.

Armenian and I took off in pursuit of Davey but We eventually Lost sight of Him as We got more and more turned around. Then Armenian heard the sound of the Creek and thought it be a Prime spot for Davey to run off to and I agreed. We followed the sound of Flowing Water until We came to the Creek, and We found Davey standing Waist Deep in the fucking Middle of the Creek. Davey was holding completely still like a Statue all accept for His eyes which were Darting back and forth from Bank to Bank as if The Ground was Alive and expected it to Snatch Him Up at any Second.

Armenian asked Davey what exactly He was doing to which Davey replied that Friendly Ass Biters couldn’t Swim and thus were Terrified of Water. I told Davey he needed to get the fuck out of the Creek so We could find Our way out of the fucking Forrest. Davey refused to move Firmly His Ground and the more I tried to get Him out the More Davey dug Himself in. I looked at Armenian with a “What the fuck do We do Now” expression plastered across it.

Armenian to His credit snapped into Action and told Davey that the Government had be Alerted to the Plague of Friendly Ass Biters. And since the Government was made Aware of the Threat had Planes fly over all Wooded Areas and Spray a Non Toxic Anti Ass Biter Agent. This Water Based Agent had been Highly Effective as the Government had just Announced that all Friendly Ass Biter had been utterly Eradicated. Armenian’s bullshit story worked like a Charm and Davey came lumbering out of the Creek without Question.

We made Our way out of the Woods and back to Davey’s which took God knows how long to Achieve. Once at Davey’s His Dad had left to go Golfing or some other dumb ass Suburban Dad Horseshit, and His Mom was putting Davey’s Baby Brother down for a Nap. We took advantage of this and had Davey run inside and retrieve His Cordless Phone which He did flawlessly without freaking out or getting distracted, or just plain forgetting what He was doing. We managed to finally get a hold of a Friend who had access to a Car who came and Picked Us up. We then bummed a Ride to Our Local Mall, BUT thats a Story for Another Day.

Thank for Reading,

By Les Sober

The Tale of Dunkin Donuts Man & Starbucks Woman

I was out this Weekend with My Wife at The Godawful Grocery Store Battling the Mind Numbing Monotony of it All. You see Errands Irritate the Shit Out of Me it’s Not the Actual Act of Shopping its All the Other Assholes I have to circumvent or Deal with Outright. The One thing that was Amusing Me was the New Dunkin Donuts T-Shirt I found in My Closet (I can’t remember where it came from Initially.) which Read: Friends Don’t Let Friends Drink Starbucks.

I got a huge fucking kick as I am a Big Time Dunkin Donuts Fan I also fucking HATE THE SHIT OUT OF STARBUCKS always Have ALWAYS WILL. Starfuck’s Coffee is a bunch of Over Hyped and Over Priced Bitter Bullshit, and Not Only That but Starfucks Customers are Pretentiously Lame Lemmings. Starfucks Pompus Customers that get Off on all the Happy Hipster Horseshit like calling the Employees Baristas or the fucking Ridiculously Coded Names for Their Coffees.

My Wife stepped away for a Minute to retrieve some sort of Ass Cream. This was for the Sole purpose of having Me ask Why She was Buying Ass Cream, and then Her Saying “It’s for My Asshole.” before Handing it Directly To Me with a Sly Smile. I like to see that I rubbed off on Her a Bit over the Years even if its My Absurd Sarcastic Sense Humor.

While My Wife was off Getting Her Prop so She could Set Me Up a Woman came Strolling By. Then out of fucking No Where She stops right in from of Me. She stood there Facing Me glaring like She just smiled the Foulest Fart imaginable with one Hand on the Shopping Cart Handle and the Other on Her Waist. She remained standing thee like that before finally speaking the fuck up, and when She did She Said “I HATE Your Shirt.” in a Totally Pissed the fuck Off tone of Voice.

After making Her Spite Filled Statement She again just Stood there in front of Me Disapprovingly like a Angry ass Soccer Mom or Some shit. Now Normally I’d have a Clever and Bitter Response that would have Leveled Her, BUT I was completely Blind Sided by This Barrage of Bullshit. So going with My Knee Jerk Reaction I Blurted out “Well Fuck You Too.” To My Surprise the Woman remained Standing Unfazed by My Harsh and Foul Mouthed Response.

The Two of Us remained in this bizarre Stand Off until luckily for Me My Wife returned. She immediately knew something weird was going on by the Scowl on My face. She asked what was going on, and I informed Her this Stranger had Stopped specifically to tell Me she Hated My Shirt. That and at that Point I had responded with the exclamation “Well Fuck You Too.” My Wife looked over at the Lady and said to her something about being a Starbucks Lover (aka Dunkin Donut Hater) to which The Strange Woman confirmed.

I was still a bit baffled by this bullshit scenario because She didn’t say She Hated My Shirt Jokingly, She didn’t say it Sarcastically, and She didn’t do the Whole “I’m only half Joking because really I’m being a Dick using a Backhanded Compliment.” She simply got in My face and Told Me She Hated My Shirt with No Context or Emotion other than Repulsed Disgust.

A Moment or Two after Admitting Her comment was Pro Starbucks Driven the Woman finally Turned and slowly walked away pushing Her Shopping Cart with Aggravated Determination. Seconds after the Woman Exited the Isle a Man came by and informed Me he liked the Shirt and thought it made all the sense in the World. He pointed out How this Weirdo Woman’s reaction only served to back the Statement written on My T-Shirt. Thats because Starbucks Coffee is Not just a fucking Scam, BUT Their Customers are Stuck the fuck Up Elitist Coffee Assholes to boot.

We finished Our Shopping Trip without Running into the StarBucks Bitch again which I guess is for the Best since I ended up getting rather Pissed Myself after the Fact. The funny fucking thing is Out of ALL (I have an extensive Collection I’ve Accumulated over My Many Years on this Planet) T-Shirts that I Own This was the One that Pissed Off Someone to the Point They had to Personally Inform Me of Their Hate. I mean in all actuality have some T-shirts that are So Offensive I don’t wear them in Public Anymore, Yet its NOT because Someone Confronted Me over any of Them. I’m just trying to Save Myself Bullshit Run Ins like The One I just Wrote About.

Thanks for Reading,

By Les Sober

Lee Jonitis: Professional People Watcher (40/365)

All Apologies for the 2 Day Delay. I have No Excuse I simply Forgot Sunday, and Yesterday I got Side Tracked by a Side Project. Again All Apologies.

As Lee’s Mind started to meld with the Madness Plastered Across the Walls. He was becoming Cerebrally Submerged within the Staggering Amount of Emotion it was Overwhelming to think about. And all the Stories, Declarations, Statements, Proclamations, Jokes, and Jest that were being Played Out in this Grotesque Public Forum.

Lee began to try and Imagine Each and Every Mind Set behind Each and Every Artist and Vandal alike. Of all the things that People could have written on the Lobby Walls Why did These People feel compelled to Write what They Did. Was it a Fare Representation of Who They really are, or were these just Temporary Outbursts to Vent the Frustration of Toiling Day after Day as these People Trudged through Their Lives?! Did They ever wonder if Anyone Read it? Did They Ever Stop to think if the Intended Party/Person it was Directed at even Actually Saw it?

Again was this just all simply Lashing Out to Somehow feel Vindicated to feel as if Someone would have to Listen to Them for Once? Did Any of these People ever find Themselves eating Lunch one Day and contemplating if the The Wall had been Repainted thus whipping Their Words from Public Record. Was that the Secret was it knowing that what They wrote wouldn’t stand the test of Time that They felt free to express Themselves as They did?!

Then Dizzy grabbed Lee’s Arm snapping Him back into the Grim Reality that was the Lobby. The pair started Their Ascent up the insanely Narrow Stair Case that reminded Lee of a fucking Submarine or Battleship scenario. It was so Narrow that if Someone was coming in the Opposite directing You’d have to turn sideways, and hug up against the No doubt Filthy wall to let Them squeeze past.

The virtual lack of any sort of real lighting gave the impression You might have inadvertently Stumbled into a Haunted House Attraction at The County Fair. Lee found it all to be Disorienting, and a bit Claustrophobic so After walking up the First couple of Flights He was Praying the Next Apartment They came to would be Dizzy’s.

“One More Flight and We’ll be there,” said Dizzy a bit Winded and Wanting a Cigarette, “Oh fucking really?! REALLY? What The HELL! After all the indiscretions I have had to Suffer Today I come Home to This?! Who wants to deal with fucking Junkies and Their Junkie Bullshit No One thats Who!’

Lee had to Strain to see around Dizzy for a view of what it Exactly it was that was causing Dizzy this Sudden Distress. There Precariously Peached at the Top of the last Flight of Stairs Lee would have to Endure was what Lee assumed was the Junkie Dizzy was set off by.

The Junkie was Slumped so Far Forward it looked like He was trying to suck His own dick right there on the Stirs. His Long Dark Brown Hair was so Matted that it has Started to Naturally form Dreadlocks which smelled like the Dumpster Water (the collection of Various Fluids leaking from Trash Bags that sink to the Bottom of a Dumpster and Stagnate Purifying until its Emptied). He was wearing a Winter Jacket that Lee thought looked like a Trench Coat for a Cold Weather Climate as He assumed it was made out of Wool or perhaps Tweed. Surprisingly enough the Junkie was Barefoot and His feet were Black from the Dirt and Grime of the World Outside. That combined with the Fact the Junkies Toe Nails were Thick, Yellowed, and Over grown made His feet look like those of a Werewolf.

Tune In Next Week For The Next Idiosyncratic Installment of………

LEE JONITIS: PROFESSIONAL PEOPLE WATCHER (41/365)

Thanks for Reading,

By Les Sober

Questions That Allude Answers: 112 Dirtbag

This Installment of Questions That Allude Answers have Something a Little Different. While there is Plenty of Unanswered Questions the Video is Tied into a REAL LIFE ONGOING POLICE INVESTIGATION.

Heres what We do Know is on February 9th 2004 21 year Old Nursing Student Maura Murray who was Attending The University of Massachusetts got into Her Car and Drove off. She din’t tell anyone Where She was going or Why She just simply Left.

Here is the Established (yet Unexplained Time Line):

at 1:00 pm Maura E-mails her Current Boyfriend stating that She received His Messages, but Didn’t feel like Talking to anyone. That and She promised She’d give Him a Call Later.

2:18 pm Maura called Her Boyfriend and Left a Voice Mail Message again Promising that They would Talk Later.

Sometime between approximately 2:18 and 3:40 pm Maura also E-mailed the Faculty at The University that She was going to Absent for a Week due to a Death in the Family. The Only Strange thing about that was THERE WAS NO DEATH IN THE FAMILY.

3:40pm Maura stops and withdraws $280 and spend $40 of it on Alcohol. Shortly There After She Left Amberst which is the Town in which The University of Massachusetts is Located. She drove out of Town on Route 112.

3:47 pm Was the Last Recorded Time Maura used Her Cell Phone to Check Her Voicemail.

Sometime around 7:00 pm Maura crashes Her Car into a Snow Bank on the Side of the Road and is Stuck. A School Bus Driver who lived in a Near By Neighborhood stopped and Offered to Help. Maura waved Him on Saying that She was Fine and had called Triple A (AAA). The Bus Driver went on His way BUT He did call and Report the Accident to the Police. Again the Strange Thing is AAA HAD NO RECORD OF SUCH A PHONE CALL.

7:46pm The New Hampshire Highway Patrol Officers arrive on Scene. They find the Car still stuck in the Snow Bank. They discovered the Car Abandoned with Mauras School Books, Make Up, and Map Quest Directions still inside. What was Missing was Maura Herself, Her Cell Phone, Debit Card, or Credit Cards. To this Day None of Them has been Found/Located.

In the Following Weeks Maura’s Father was quoted as saying that he Thought Maura was”Kidnapped by some Dirtbag.”

NOW Fast Forward to February 9th 2012 which was the 8 year Anniversary of Maura’s Unexplained Disappearance when a Mysterious Video was Posted by a YouTuber going by 112 Dirtbag on His Channel (which has been taken down) Mr.112dirtbag. The Video is of a Man laughing continuously until right at the End He stops abruptly, Smiles and Winks. Then the Video fades to a Black Screen where the a Message Reads “Happy Anniversary”

Now if You remember Maura went Missing on Route 112 by what Her Father claimed was a “Dirtbag” , and if put 2 and 2 together and You get 112 Dirtbag.

So is this Some kind of Sick Joke by some Mentally Unfit Basket Case who has access to a Computer OR is This in Fact Maura’s Actual Killer Mocking The Family of His Victim along with The Authorities???

It’s a Documented Fact Several Serial Killers through out American History have Contacted and Mocked the Authorities with Disgust and Contempt. Jack The Ripper wrote One Letter to the Detectives in Charge of His Case with the Return Address simply Reading “FROM HELL” (and Yes that’s were the Name for the Johnny Depp Movie about Jack the Ripper). The Zodiac sent 3 nearly Identical letters containing Cryptogram Messages to 3 different Newspapers and demanded that the Letter be Published.

The Son of Sam also left multiple Letters Mocking the Police, Their Investigation, and promise of Further Murders which were HIGHLY PUBLICIZED by the Press.Then there is The Louisiana Ax Man who Wrote a Open Letter on March 13, 1919 claiming He’d Kill at 12:15 am on March 19th, But He’d Spare the Occupants of any Place Playing Jazz (it worked as there were no Reported Murders that Night)

It Should be Noted that ALL 3 EXAMPLES Jack The Ripper, The Zodiac Killer, and The Louisiana Ax Man WERE NEVER CAUGHT.

IF YOU OR ANYONE Have ANY information that You think Pertinent or Important Please contact:

The FBI at 1-(202)-324-3000

The New Hampshire State Police at 1-(603)-233-3860

There are No Words to Wrap Up this Little Bit of Sick………

Thanks for Reading/Viewing

Presented by Les Sober

Ego & Irony on Twitter

I was just on Twitter doing what I do, and I noticed a Famous Musician (Who I will not Name because I don’t want to Deal with Bullshit) I follow had Tweeted a Strangely Uncharacteristic Tweet. The Tweet said in summation that Her Followers Had “Disappointed” Her and Not just This time but Apparently a Few Times Before as Well. The Tweet was annoyingly Laden with the Angry Face, Thumbs Down, and Fire Emojis making the Tweet look Juvenile as fuck.

There was also a almost Minute Long Video included in the Tweet where said Musician Directly Addresses the Issue at Hand. She again whines about How Her Followers Have and Current are Disappointing Her. The Followers so called egregious Offense apparently was Not Responding to Her Tweet(s) the Way She Wanted Them Too. And for this reason and this reason alone She is Leaving Twitter for Instagram because Twitter again some how Personally Let Her Down.

Granted She is Intensely Political and Hates The Current State of Affairs in America (as do Millions of Other My self Included), and wants to use Her Celebrity or Fame to Influence Her Fans/Followers into Taking Action. In Fact She refers to its as Her “Calls To Action” which where not Received as well as She would have Liked, and is the Primary Cause of this Self Serving Self Pity of Hers.

I see Her point though She utterly fucked it up with Her “Poor Me” Tweet. She wanted to Motivate People via Social Media and thinks Instagram is the Better Social Media Platform for Her, But the Tweet came off ALL KINDS OF WRONG. In Fact it was so fucked Up in My Opinion I’m No Longer a Fan of Her in any Aspect after Watching that Video.

What I got Out of the Video was This:

“People aren’t Doing What I Want When I Want!! They won’t feel and act just like Me on some shit, So fuck Them, Twitter Followers are fucking Disappointments! I’m taking My Toys and Going to Instagram!!! The Instagram Users will Listen to Me and React The Way I WANT THEM TO!!!”

Talk about fucking Egotistical am I right?! How about She just being Happy with the fucking Fact She has Fans/Followers in the First fucking Place. This Feed My Ego, Feed My Fame Horseshit that She is wollowing in is Absolutely CONTEMPTIBLE and DISGUSTING.

REMEMBER NO FANS NO FAME ASSHOLE. RESPECT Your Fans and Appreciate Them for Essentially making You Who You Are. Why would a Fan remain a Fan after Reading/Watching that bullshit Tweet? NOT ME FUCK THAT. For Everyone of Her “Poor Me”s I have a “Fuck You.”

The Ironic thing is as You may Imagine She HATES Trump (As do I) He’s the Vile Head of the GOP Beast, and like Many Others She has talked Shit about Donny’s Immature, Ignorant, Evil and Egotistical Behavior.

So it’s IRONIC that Her Departure from Twitter is EXACTLY HOW TRUMP WOULD HAVE DONE IT.

1. You See When The American People Don’t back Donny or Kiss His Traitorous Orange Ass He Sinks into a Sea of Self Pity, He then gets Angry as Hell, and Lastly He will Rage Tweet about It. Also

2. If Trump doesn’t like Something then Any and Everyone Associated with whatever it is He Dislikes are Automatically Idiots, Fake, Incompetent, Criminal etc.

3. And Finally Trump will have Such a Tremendous Tantrum that He will Completely Quite whatever He is Failing at (which is every fucking thing), and Walk away Head Down claiming He No Longer can be Bothered by this Newly Deemed Nonsense.

This was an Impromptu Lesson from The School of Don’t Meet Famous People You’re a Fan because They’re Human, and Thus are More than Likely Utter Assholes in Reality that will Totally Disappoint You.

Ignorance IS Bliss.

Thanks for Reading,

Les Sober