Month: April 2020

Dark Web Video: Corpus Christus (Lobotomy)

Welcome to this Installment of Dark Web Video Featuring CORPUS CHRISTUS!

First off the Name is sort of a Shock Type Tactic as it’s a Play on the Latin Corpus Christi which translates into The Body of Christ, but that’s Not All. It turns Out Corpus Christus is in Fact the Stop Motion Nightmare By the wonderfully Demented David Hatch (Who Directed, Produced, and Animated Lobotomy for Hatch Films). Corpus Christus is actually Hatch’s 2005 Video Tilted Lobotomy with the Video’s Beginning and Ending Credits Edited Out. WE thought it Only Fare to Post Both Videos as Proof so Below You will Find Corpus Christus followed by Lobotomy.

          \

Plot: A Man going through the Aging Process is Tended to By a Series of Demonically looking and Tortured Mechanical Minions throughout His Life.

Possible Themes:

  • It could be a Religious Commentary about How much Horrible Shit has been committed in the Name of God.
  • It could be a Social Commentary about Battling /Coping with One’s Inner Demons or about not letting Your age Define You or Possible its about Regret.
  • It could be about the Aging Process in that from the Moment We are Born are Bodies are Aging, and as They do They start to Wear Out, Break Down, and Fail. That and with more Recent Medical Developments People are Living Longer than Ever, but How can We Keep Our Bodies Maintained trough a Longer Existence?!

Thanks for Watching,

 Presented by Les Sober

Saying “Let Me Let You Go” Is Fucking Lame

One of My Best Friends from High School, and only one of a few People I kept in Touch Sporadically through out the Years was Bluejetski (Sad to Say Bluejetski Passed Fairly Recently). Something We had in common was We both were in Agreement People do Absurd Shit without even thinking, or at Least Thinking it Through. A Prime Example was that on of the Most Common Absurd things that People do is End Phone Conversations by Saying “Well Let Me Let You Go…..” which is Utterly Ridiculous.

If I’m the one Ending the fucking Phone Call then Why am I acting like the Person I’m talking to said They had to Go?! Also whenever Someone says “Let Me Let You Go…..” They explain what it is They have to Do Now, and that’s the Reason They’re Ending the Call. If You think about it for a Second it makes Much more Sense to say the Alternative “I Have To Go…..” since it’s Far more Accurate a Statement.

            

Luckily on of the Reasons Bluejetski and I were Friends in the First Place was We shared the same Absurdly Bizarre and Extremely Dark sense of Humor. So in this Case We decided as Far as We were Concerned We would always Opt for “I have to Go” over “Let Me Let You Go”, but that wasn’t all Not by a Long Shot. Next We Launch an Unofficially Official Who can Top Who with the Reason We had to Go. Since Blujetski’s Untimely Demise I’ve reflected on Our Unique Friendship to say the Least. Thus I decided to Type up a Mock List as an Example(s) of the Weird Shit We Said to Each other over Our 27 Year Friendship.

Here We Go: “I Have To Go…..”

  • I Just Farted Blood.
  • I shit so hard I Prolapsed My Rectum.
  • My Grandfather just Spontaneously Combusted.
  • My Cat Just Ate My Dog.
  • I got my Dick stuck in My Bong.
  • My Grandmother just Transformed into My Grandfather.
  • The Aliens are Here and want to get on with the Probing.
  • I was holding a Seance and Now all My Dead Relatives are here.
  • I just made Jam out of a Jellyfish.
  • A Bear is raping a Rabbit in My back Yard.

 

  • I accidentally Disemboweled  Myself.
  • The Acid I took just Kicked and I being chased by French Fries.
  • A Dingo Ate My Baby. (Hats off to You if You get That Reference)
  • Satan is Calling.
  • Just started a New Crack Addiction.
  • I have to Pawn My Great Grandfather’s Gold Teeth.
  • I have to call 911 I was Masturbating and the Cock Ring is Stuck.
  • I was reading a Porn Magazine and got a Paper cut on My Cock.
  • I have to put a VooDoo curse on My Neighbors thats gives them all Herpies.
  • Jesus is calling Me Home I’m running Late.

  • I have to go watch Debbie does Nova Scotia (Hats Off if You get that Reference.
  • Stepped on a Needle at the Jersey Shore and Now am Addicted to Heroin.
  • I have to Jump Up My own Butt and Die.
  • I’m having a Way to Near Near Death Experience.
  • My Pet Hamster got Aids.
  • I have to Lobotomize a Stray Cat.
  • Drive the Sheep to the Sheep Fuckers Union Meeting.
  • I’m going to a Circle Jerk Hosted by an Octopus.
  • I have to Call Cthulhu (Hots off again if You get That Reference)
  • I have to find a Hooker with Grabs because I want Seafood, but I’m Broke.

 

  • I have to Impale My Boss.
  • I just Passed Go and Didn’t Collect $200.
  • Because a Riot Doesn’t start on its own.
  • A chicken thinks My Balls are Eggs and Won’t get off My Lap.
  • Have to Eat Pork’n Beans in Hell.
  • To Prove I’m a Real Man by Wiping My Ass with Barbwire.
  • I’m gonna try jerking off with Sandpaper.
  • I didn’t look both ways before crossing the Street.
  • A Bus Full of Nuns just Exploded Outside My House.
  • Forgot to Buy Fertilizer for My Mom’s Garden so I have to go Shit in It.

            

  • Going to Populate Antartica.
  • I fucked My Girlfriends brains Out and Now I have to figure out how to put them back in.
  • I have to figure out what to do with all these Dead Ninjas.
  • I have to Wax on Wax Off.
  • Join a Boy Band and Kill Myself.
  • I have to Eat Shit.
  • I have to get My Fuck Flying because I don’t give One.
  • I was scratching My ass and Accidentally Fisted Myself.
  • Have to Gargle with Broken Glass.
  • See about Aborting My Uncle.

           

  • I just went completely Deaf.
  • I give a Shit, But I don’t give a fuck.
  • Chuck Norris is here and wants to throw down.
  • Need to hold onto a blade of Grass to keep from falling off the Planet.
  • I have to go throw Airplane Liquor Bottles at My Alcoholic Aunt.
  • Have to get going on a Old Fashioned Bender.
  • I just turned inside Out.
  • ME, Myself, and I are in a Fight.
  • Swallow a Sword and shit a Dagger.
  • My head wasn’t fastened On so I Lost it.

  • My Brain fell out of My Ear and Rolled under the Refrigerator.
  • I have to train My Flea Circus because We’re going on a Tour.
  • Breed My Captive Platypuses.
  • I bought Guam so I have to Fill out a shit ton of Paperwork.
  • My Tapeworm is Hungry.
  • I got so High (aka Stoned) I can see My House from Here.
  • My brother is on PCP in the Backyard Kicking the shit out of a Squirrel.
  • I have to Try Bud Dry. (Hots off if You get that Reference)
  • Get in a Shouting Match with a Mute.
  • There Nazis on the Moon and Someone has to Stop them.

  • Moving to Chernobyl to see if I gain any Super Powers.
  • I have an Appointment to Pierce and Tattoo My Taint.
  • My 4th Cousin Removed needs an Exorcism.
  • I ate Shit and will Now Die.
  • Hack My Robots Brain to see what it’s Thinking.
  • Spear Fish in the Pond at the Local Golf Course.
  • Go to the Community Pool and Throw Rocks at People.
  • About to get into a Knife Fight with a Homicidal Hobo.
  • I’m converting to Cannibalism and a Tasty looking Jogger just went by.
  • I have to Just Say No. (Yup Hats Off if  You got that Reference)

           

  • I have to go fuck Myself.
  • I got to start cooking a Rack of Spam.
  • I’ve gone Temporarily Insane, But I’ll Be Ok by Monday.
  • I got High on My own Supply.
  • I’m going to Start Some Anarchy in the UK (Hots off Reference)
  • Because I have something I need to do The Day After Yesterday.
  • I lost My fucking Marbles so I replaced them with Tiddly Winks and its not working out well.
  • I Assumed and made an Ass out of You and Me.
  • Disgraced My Family and am going to Commit Ritual Suicide as Penance.
  • I have to go See a Man about a Widget.

           

  • I just got Confirmation I’m going to be on Jerry Springer.
  • My Trailer Park is on Fire.
  • I’m upgrading from Double to Triple Wide.
  • My Government Cheese Just Arrived.
  • I’m throwing a Red Roof Party.
  • I just went on the Deep Web and Drowned.
  • I have to Pick My Teeth with a Razor Blade.
  • I’m not going Grave Robbing I’m Grave Spelunking.
  • Death comes to those who Wait and I’ve been on Hold Forever.
  • I just Projectile Vomited so I need to make sure I’m not Possessed.

Thanks for Reading,

  By Les Sober  

FYB’s Salute To Eccentrics: Korney Creates a HOMUNCULUS

We came across a Enthusiastic Russian Man Who was Posting a Series of Home Videos of Him Attempting to Create a Actual Homunculus. Though He never produced the Definition of a Homunculus what He managed to Create is Something Straight out of Science fucking Fiction.

Definition of a Homunculus:

Is a Representation of a Miniature Fully Formed Human Being (Example Tom Thumb). Popularized in 16th Century Alchemy. Alchemy is an Ancient Branch of Natural Philosophy. Most People are Familiar with Alchemists as The Lunatics from History that tried to Purify, Mature, and Perfect Materials (example Transforming “Base Metals such as Lead into “Noble Metals” most Notably Gold. Alchemists also attempted to Create an Elixir of Immortality, the creation of Panaceas able to Cure Disease, the Development of Alkahest a Universal Solvent, and the Creation of Homunculi to Name a Few. The Homunculus Concept has Roots in Performationism (a Formerly Popular Theory that Organisms Develop from Miniature Versions of Themselves).

           

The Homunculus first Appeared by Name in the Alchemical writings Attributed to Paracelsus (1493-1542) In De Natura Rerum (1537) Paracelsus Outlines His Method for Creating Homunculi:

That the Sperm of a Man be Putrified bu Itself in a Sealed cucurbit for 40 Days with the Highest Degree of Putrefaction in a Horse’s Womb, or at least so Long that it comes to life and moves Itself, and Stirs, which is Easily Observed. After this Time it will look Somewhat like a Man, but Transparent, without a Body. If, after this, it be Fed Wisely with the Arcanum of Human Blood, and be Nourished for up to 40 Weeks, and be kept in the even Heat of a Horse’s Womb, a Living Human Child Grows therefrom, with all its Members like another Child, which is Born of a Woman, But Much Smaller.

In 1775, Count Johann Ferdinand von Kufstein working together with Abbe Geloni, an Italian Cleric, is Reputed to have Created 10 Homunculi with the Ability to Foresee the Future, which von Kufstein kept in a Glass Containers at His Masonic Lodge in Vienna. Dr. Emil Besetzny’s Masonic Handbook Die Sphinx, Devoted an Entire Chapter to the wahrsagenden Geisterm(Crying Ghosts). These Homunculi are Reputed to have been seen by Several People, Including some Local Dignitaries.

            

With That Said Now Back to The Russian and His Homunculus Experiments…..

The Man’s goes by the Name Korney (the R is Silent), and Unfortunately there isn’t a whole hell of a lot about Him online Outside of His Passionate Homunculi Experiments. Here is what We have Uncovered Thus Far:

  • Korney went Silent for 6 moths without Posting.
  • After 6 Months Rumors started that Korney had if fact Died of a Heart Attack.
  • Once the Rumor of Korney’s apparent Demise Conspiracy Theories Erupted like an On Line Volcano.
  • One Rumor was the KGB or Russian Government Assassinated Karney due to His Experimentation and “Knowing Too Much”. The only Problem with this Theory is Why the hell would the Russian Government/KGB wait for Years (and countless Video Posts) before Intervening?!
  • Then There’s The Frankenstein Theory to consider. The Frankenstein Theory is Based on Korney’s Videos where in one Episode in the Series HE announces One of His Two Current Homunculi in Fact Emits Electricity. Karney Demonstrates this in the Video using an Electrical Detection Device of some Kind. So the Theory is The Homunculus (Named Pikachu after its Electric Emitting Capabilities) may have Accidentally or perhaps Intentionally as a Defense Mechanism Electrocuted Korney causing said Heart Attack . Now to Believe this Theory One must believe that Korney’s Video’s are Real and Not Faked in Any Way.

           

  • The 3rd Major Theory is the Videos were Elaborately Staged using Expert Camera Work and Possibly a bit of CGI thrown in.
  • If The Videos are indeed Fake it Doesn’t Diminish the Excited Enthusiasm for this Korney exhibits for Experimentation Project then Faking His Own Death wouldn’t be Out of the Question. It be the Perfect End Game Move as it would leave all the Questions about His Videos Unanswered Permanently. If He Faked His own Death or Not there will always remain what They Call in the Legal Realm Reasonable Doubt. No One will be able to Definitively say it Was or Wasn’t Real.
  • So if Korney was planning to Fake His Own Death to End the Series as a Real or Fake Mystery He needed a Set Up for the Ending. The Electricity the Homunculus exhibited in His Video then would provide a Perfect Set up for the Heart Attack Scenario. The Principle would have been Simplicity personified as The Homunculi apparently Live in Water and Allegedly Emit an Electricity in some Capacity. This Provides the Set Up for a Possible Electrical Shock, and Electrocution can Cause Heart Attacks or Stop The Human Heart. And since No One Knows if the Videos are Real or Not Who’s to say a Homunculus Couldn’t emit an Electrical Shock great enough to Kill a Full Grown Man?!
  • There was also Official News/Media coverage of Korney’s Passing, and of Course some People believe it was a Fake News Cast also Created by Korney to Help convince People He was indeed Dead. Others believed One of the Reporters in the News Report was in fact Korney proving that He faked His own Death. Some People believe the News Story is actually the Cover Story for the Possible and Alleged Assassination by the KGB/Russian Government.

Enjoy.

Thanks For Watching,

  Presented By Les Sober

Friday Splatter Horror Movie: COLOR ME BLOOD RED!

FYB is Delighted to bring You Tonight’s feature the 1965 Cult Classic Splatter COLOR ME BLOOD RED by None Other than “The Godfather of Gore” Herschell Gordon Lewis! Color ME Blood Red is the Third Movie in what Fan’s have Dubbed Lewis’s Trilogy of Blood/Gore along with Lewis’s Blood Feast 1963  (Also Featured on FYB), and Two Thousand Maniacs! (1964).

           

Brief Plot Summery: Color ME Blood Red is The Gruesome and Gory Tale of the Temperamental and Annoyingly Pompous Painter Adam Sorg. Adam is obsessed with becoming the Next Big Thing in the Fine Art World, and is Desperately trying to Sell His Paintings to a Local Art Gallery. A Prestigious Art Critic who was invited to the Exaction is Shocked and Appalled by the Sorg’s work much to His Dismay. The Critic makes a Snide Comment about how Sorg’s Paintings Lack True Color which set Sorg off Down a DARK, BLOODY, AND MURDEROUS PATH to Critical Acceptance.

           

Later back at Sorg’s Art Studio His Obnoxious Girlfriend accidentally Cuts Her Finger on a Nail sticking out of a Painting Frame. Sorg sees the Blood on the Canvas and His Psychotic Mindset leads Him to Believe that Blood provides the Color His Art has been Lacking. While convincing His Girlfriend to Use Her Blood She Recoils at the Thought, and tells Sorg to use His Own Blood. Sorg takes Her up on Her advice and Starts Painting Using HIs Own Blood, But there’s the Demented Dilemma that Sorg’s Body can Only Produce so Much Blood. Sorg then turns to Brutally Killing Female Models and HARVESTING THEIR BLOOD as a Source of Color for His Ongoing Works. Will Sorg’s Self Indulgent Slaughterfest make Sorg the Artistic Icon He Yearns to Be, Or Just an Insane Self Absorbed Serial Killer?! You’ll have to Watch and See. Enjoy

Hope You Enjoyed this Bloody Little Art Lesson as Much as We Did.

Thanks for Watching,

  Presented By Les Sober

Dark Web Videos: Hamburger Lady

Welcome to this Installment of Dark Web Videos Featuring THE HAMBURGER LADY!

  • While this Video was Dredged Up from the Abyss known as The Dark Web No One can be certain of its exact Origins.
  • Many People have claimed the Video is Cursed or Possessed in someway that will Negatively Affect Viewers. Others believe it was made by a Group of Satanists or some Devil Worshipping Death Cult. Even others claim it causes Insomnia, Paranoia, Nightmares, Disorientation, and overall feeling of Dread and Impending Doom. Others yet claim it’s Part of a Military or Government Experiment in Mind Control and Psychological Manipulation. Some even believe its a Coded Message from The Illuminati or New World Order (NWO).
  • The Narrator of The Hamburger Lady seems to be a Medical Professional or Specialist who is chronicling/Discussing the Case of One of Their Patients Who has been Severely Burned from the Waist Up.
  • As it Turns Out the Infamous Hamburger Lady is Based on a Fictitious Doctor’s Letter written by Postal Artist Blaster Al Ackerman in 1978.
  • Postal Art (or Mail Art) is a Popular Artistic Movement centered on Sending Small Scale Works of Art through the Postal Service.
  • Media commonly used by Postal Artists include but not limited to Postcards, a Collage, of Found or Recycled Objects, Rubber Stamps, Artist Created Stamps (called Artistamps), and Paint BUT can Also Include Music, Sound Art, Poetry, or ANYTHING that can be put in an Envelope and Sent Via The Postal Service.
  • The same Year (1978) Pioneering Industrial Band Throbbing Gristle released their Third and Final Album titled “D.o.A” featuring a Song Called The Hamburger Lady which used Samples of Ackerman’s Fake Doctor’s Letter pertaining to a Fictitious Burn Victim read aloud.
  • Throbbing Gristles’s Philosophy was Unconventional in that they Believed ANYTHING that makes a Sound is an Instrument, and if You can make the Sound then You are a Musician.
  • Below You will find the Dark Web Video The Hamburger Lady followed by Throbbing Gristle’s song The Hamburger Lady.

Enjoy.

Throbbing Gristle “Hamburger Lady” off Their Album D.o.A

Thanks for Watching,

  Presented by Les Sober

Dark Web Videos: The Grifter

Welcome to Yet Another Dose of Disturbing Dark Web Videos Featuring: THE GRIFTER! Is the Grifter just a Prop for a CreepyPasta OR Could it be Proof of Illegal Human Experimentation?! Decide For Yourselves.

  • The Story Goes that the Video was first mentioned on 4Chan’s X Image Board.
  • The Very First Copy of The Actual Grifter Video was posted on September 8, 2009 by a user Named Jojacob666
  • The First Thread for The Grifter stated “A Video so Disturbing that it would take a HUGE Toll on the Mental State of Anyone Who Watched it.
  • The Second Thread pertaining to The Grifter referenced the Video in greater Detail Referencing “A Bath Tub Full of Maggots”, ‘Text in a Different Language”, and “A Cradle with a Child in It.” the Writer also wrote an Warning stating watching The Grifter is a Soul Rendering Experience Far More Horrible than Anything You Can Imagine.
  • The Strange Text that appears towards the End of the Video is written in the International Auxiliary Language Esperanto.
  • International Auxiliary Languages (IALs) are Languages Constructed with the Aim of Facilitating Communication between People who would Otherwise have No Other Language in Common. They are designed to be Significantly Simpler, and thus more Easily Learnt, then National or “Natural” Languages.
  • Esperanto has become “The Most Outlandishly Successful invented Language ever” and is the Most Widely Spoken Constructed International Auxiliary Language. Esperanto is believed to be one of Fifty Languages that are Most Used Internationally.
  • The Message that appears towards the end of the Video Translates to: “This Child is Still Alive and Now a Young Man living in a Local Shelter (Name Not Given). He Never Spoke and is still in a Catatonic State.”

Enjoy.

Thanks for Watching,

 Presented By Les Sober

Animation: LA FAIM (Hunger)

La Faim (Hunger) is the Impressively Repulsive 1973 Animated Short Film Directed by Peter Foldes, and Produced by the National Film Board of Canada. La Faim has the Unique Distinction of Being one of the FIRST Computer Animated Films, and it took a Year and a Half to Make. The Director Peter Foldes collaborated with he National Research Council’s Division of Radio and Electrical Engineerings’ Data Systems Group, who Decided to Develop a Computer Animation Application in 1969.

La Faim is a Grotesque, Cruel, Violent, and Highly Effective Story Told Without Words in a Bold Speechless Narrative. The Film is a Grave Morality Tale about Greed, Gluttony, and Consumerism in Contemporary Society. The Film’s Main Character an Aggressively Self-Indulgent Business Man with a Voracious Appetite in a World Plagued by Hunger and Poverty.

The Man starts by Eating only a Minor Amount to begin with, but soon He’s Eating More and More He’s simply Never Satisfied. This of course Inevitably leads to a VIOLENT AND NAUSEATING Transformation as the Man is Devoured by His Own Increasing Greediness. Eventually in The End the Greedy Overindulgent Businessman is consumed by his own Greed, and then He Himself is Eaten by the Starving Masses.

La Faim begs the Question “Who Needs Ethic When You Have Everything You Need or Want at Your Finger Tips?”

Thanks for Watching,

Presented By Les Sober

BUTCHERS HAREM: Brutal Australian Underground Horrorcore

After Posting the Passenger Of Shit Video For Staple Tapeworms To My Penis it seemed fitting to do a Follow Up with BUTCHERS HAREM.

Butchers Harem is a Underground Australian Brutal Horrorcore Rap Group that mixes the Influences of Goregrind and Horrorcore Lyrics over Heavy and Distorted Hip Hop Beats. The Group was formed in Outer West of Sydney in the Blue Mountains as a Music Collective featuring MC Bushpig (aka ScatButcher), MC Cumblood, MC Slurry, The Woundbearer, MC Twot, and MC Mangia (aka The Anal Executioner). The Group officially formed in 2004 and the project was formed from the Remnants of the Infamous Suicidal Rap Orgy which MC Bushpig had founded in 2001. MC Bushpig  whose Real Name is Swift Treweeke has the Distinction of Holding the Title as the “Godfather of Brutal Horrorcore.”

           

Butchers Harem was the Premier Australian (as well as New Zealand) to Produce this Type of Unconventional, Highly Aggressive, and Obscenely Brutal Style which gave Birth to a Uniquely Influential Australian Version of Horrorcore Music (Often referred to as “The Brutal Australian Sound”). The Group mad a Large Impression on the European Scene Opening the Door to Multiple Tours of Holland, Czech Republic, France, Germany, Belgium, and Greece.

Mc CumBlood    

In 2008-2009 after Recording the Still Unreleased Album X Rated Puppet Theatre of the Dead most of the Group’s Members Quit. In spite of the Set Back in 2011 Mc Bushpig and MC Cumblood released the First Butchers Hrem Album Snuff Porn Gore on Butchers Harem Productions. Currently the Group is Recording Their 3rd Album Erotic Stories Written in Blood Though MC Bushpig/Butchers Harem haven’t done a single Interview since February 2015). So You can Expect to Hear New Levels of Brutality and Vomitous from the Australian Masters of Horrorcore Music.

(NOTE to Reader/Listeners: Brutal Horrorcore (also known as Gore Rap or Australian Horrorcore is the Bastard Offspring of Horrorcore Music which Mixes Styles of Brutal Death Metal (a Subgenre of Death Metal) and Hip Hop. The Sound Features Death Metal Growling Vocals with Production Elements of Horrorcore, Devil Shyt, Hardcore Techno, Breakcore, and Noise Music. Brutal Hardcore Lyrics are generally Much More Extreme Subject Matter than Older School Horrorcore, and Their Album Covers are Extremely Sexual, Bloody, or Violent reminiscent of the Typical Death Metal Album Art.)

Thanks for Listening,

 Presented by Les Sober*

(* This Post is Dedicated to FYB’s Good Friend Mr. Nobody. We Highly Recommend that You Check Out His Music on Youtube.)

The Deviant Detective #7 Von Dire or Be Damned

“Like You Detective,” Otto continued,”I have little time to spare so Time is of the Essence in this matter You see. I will leave You with all the Intel You will need to Start Your Hunt, and Detective Please remember above all Discretion is Vitally Important while Dealing with as well as Resolving this Issue at Hand.”

With that said Otto drained His Drink in one Large Sip, Stood Up Quickly, and Handed Rock a Manilla Envelope He had retrieved from His Coat Pocket before Abruptly Leaving. Although Rock appreciated Ott’s Candor He still was a Little Taken a back about How suddenly the Conversation Ended. Rock Tossed the Envelope onto the Bar in front of Him with the enthusiasm of a Man who was just Served Divorce Papers. He flagged Manny down for another refill before lighting a Cigarette, and Exhaling Deeply a Token Sign of a Tired Soul. As Rock was leisurely putting out His Cigarette He noticed in His Peripheral Vision someone sitting down next to Him. Exhausted but still curious Rock slowly and deliberately turned to face the Person who had taken up Residence on the neighboring Bar Stool.

There sitting Next to Rock was a Petite Young Girl with Shiny Jet Black Hair and Piercingly Green Eyes who looked to be 20 years Rock’s Junior. Rock couldn’t Help noticing the Girl given the Circumstances in a Old Man Dive Bar She stuck out like a sore fucking Thumb that’s was for sure. Even Manny   who usually was infallible seemed enamored by the Young Girl He was fumbling and bubbling the Bottles of Booze He was inventorying. Rock found Himself wondering How this Girl ended up at Old McCoy’s when She should be at some Generic Sports Bar with a bunch of Annoyingly Loud Girlfriends and Their Dumbfuck Frat Loving Jock Boyfriends.

           

The Girl picked a Pretzel from the Bowl that was sitting next to Rock’s empty Shot Glass and Mulled it over in Her fingers as if in Deep Contemplation. Rock started to think of various reasons the Girl might have picked such an Out of the Way Hole in the Wall Like Old McCoy’s. More than likely Rock thought She was simply hiding from Someone like an Asshole Ex-Boyfriend or Perhaps She was hiding from the World in General. Before Rock had time to consider another possibilities the Young Girl became to Speak.

” Don’t think I was being Rude or that I’m a inconsiderate Asshole, but I couldn’t Help over Hearing Your conversation earlier with that Stiff and Stern looking Investment Banker looking motherfucker.” said the Girl without looking up from the Pretzel in Her Hand.

“COuldn’t Help? What the fuck does that even mean, it’s just a bullshit excuse People use so hopefully the Person They were ease dropping on Doesn’t haul off and Hit Them,” criticized Rock with Angry Frustration, “You eased dropped on My conversation because Your Nosey and wanted to Hear what We were saying. My Point is is wasn’t a fucking accident or freak fucking occurrence. You deliberately decided to Listen in plain and fucking simple that’s the way I See it.”

“That aside if You’re going Hunting for Someone on The Dark Web The Old Fart was right Your going to need somebody with some serious Tech Skills. Anyone can use the Dark Web, but finding someone takes a shit ton more Know How than the Basics.,” the Girl said completely ignoring Rock’s harsh criticism, “Like You said Anonymity is Key and lets face it the Dark Web is the New fucking Alaska for motherfuckers who Do Not want to be Found.”

            

“Look I’ve had one hell of a fucking Day so I assume this is where You tell Me why You’re That Person.” muttered Rock into His Beer Glass.

“Have You ever Heard of the Hacker Known as VonDire?” asked The yOung Girl Slightly with a smirk.

Now Rock may not have been the most Technically inept person on the Planet but that didn’t mean He was in the Dark by any Means. Rock had in fact heard of VonDire who had been the Center of Several Big Tech Hacking News Stories over the last Year or So. Aside from the List of Litanies the Media like everyone else had No Idea or Actual Information pertaining to Who VonDire was. The News had Reported a Variety of Allegations such as VonDire was a Member of the Hacktivist Group Anonymous until getting Kicked Out of the Organization for Conflict of Ideology. They had Reported VonDire was an Ex-Military Anti-Government Radical, a Anarchistic Tech Terrorist who Lived Only to create Chaos through Destruction. There were News Stories Alleging VonDire was the Illegitimate Love Child of Dark Web’s Silk Road Founder Ross Ulbricht (aka Dread Pirate Roberts) and an Infamous Drug Cartel’s Mistress, and that VonDire was a Hackers Version of Robin Hood targeting Corrupt Corporations and Billionaire Bastards.

It was all Here say because if Any One Knew who VonDire was or How to Track Him/Her Down it would have already happened, and been blasted across the Media Platforms like wild fucking fire. This Meant VonDire is as much of a Mystery as They were From Day One. Not to mention Rock wasn’t a Blithering Idiot or a Drunken Fool so He was well aware that the Shit People Say in Bar’s is simply that Shit People Say in Bars. Rock wasn’t impressed by the Name Drop and He sure as Hell didn’t have a single reason whatsoever to believe that this Attractive and Petite Thing sitting Neck to Him was a Wanted International Hacker. Seriously Rock thought to Himself was He supposed to Believe this Pretty Little Thing sitting Next to Him was the One who had been wreaking Havoc on a Global Level that’s fucking Certain.

            

“Look You don’t have to believe Me its doesn’t Chap My Ass in the Least,” replied the Young Lady,”It’s obvious by the Scowl plastered across Your well worn face You Don’t, but not only that You Don’t care either. What You Should Care about is the Man Your considering Working For Mr. Otto Van de Berg.”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” demanded Rock gruffly as He grew tired of Talking to People when He had come to the Bar to Drink Alone.

“Well I’ll keep it sort at least for now since I’m aware Your Time is Precious,” countered The Young Lady, “The Van de Bergs Aren’t Angels They’re Devils. In Reality The Van de Berg’s are some of the Evilest, and most Revoltingly Vile Pieces of Shit to have ever been Regurgitated up from The Bowels of Hell.The Van de Bergs have amassed a Fortune since the Early 20th Century in Oil and Railroads. In the Beginning The Van de Bergs indulged in White Collar Crimes like Fraud, Tax Evasion, Insider Trading, Ponzi Schemes, Embezzlement, Wage Theft, Bribery, Labor Racketeering, Forgery, Copyright Infringement, Cybercrime, Identity Theft, and Money Laundering. The Whole Nine Illegal Yards as it were You see Greed is One of the Biggest and Dangerous Motivators of Man.”

            

“So They’re Wealthy Elitist Assholes, The Sons of Bitches of Bureaucracy Out to Finically Rape the World’s Riches on the Broken Backs of the Common Man.”commented Rock almost under His Breath.

“The Story Doesn’t Stop There Oh No the Van de Bergs started to Expand Their Criminal Repertoire first with Gambling and Loan Sharking. Next the Van de Berg’s branched Out into Arms Dealing followed by Them Entering the Drug Game. Then it was Prostitution, Human Trafficking, and Murder on a Massive Scale. At this Point if it’s Illegal and there’s money to be made the Van de Bergs are involved in it to some degree.” said the Young Girl with the Honesty of a Nun.

Stay Tuned for THE DEVIANT DETECTIVE #8 Coming Soon

Thanks for Reading,

  By Les Sober (12:31am)

FYB Saturday Splatter Movie: BLOOD FEAST!

FYB is Ecstatic to bring You what is Considered to be the First Ever Splatter Film EVER MADE! This Video Nasty is the Cult Classic BLOOD FEAST composed, Shot, and Directed by “The Godfather of Gore” Herschell Gordon Lewis Himself. BLOOD FEAST immediately became Notorious for its EXPLICIT VIOLENCE AND GORE. Also the Main Character/Killer Fuad Ramses has been described as “The Original Machete-Wielding Madman”open the Door for Future Characters such as Micheal Myers (Halloween Franchise) and Jason Vorhees (Friday The 13th Franchise).

           

Brief Synopsis: Fuad Ramses and His Family have relocated from America to France, where They Own and Operate an American Style Diner. Unfortunately for the Ramses Business is less than Stealer so Fuad takes a Night Job working in the Museum of Ancient Egyptian Culture. There He is compulsively drawn to a Seductive Statue of the Ancient Egyptian Goddess Ishtar. Before long the Statue of Ishtar starts speaking to Fuad through Visions, and Finally succumbs to Her DEADLY DESIRES!

After Surrendering to The Statue of Ishtar’s Malevolent Charms Fuad begins a New Life in which MURDER AND CANNIBALISM become His Daily Routine. He starts to Prepare a Ritual Feast to Honor Ishtar with a Lavish Affair SOAKED IN BLOOD, ORGANS, AND INTESTINES OF HIS VICTIMS! As The Butchered Bodies are stacked upon the Alter of Ishtar, Fuad slowly Descends Deeper Into Utter Insanity until He serves Only as Ishtar’s Human Puppet. The Only Issue is Ishtar Thirsts Not Just For HUMAN BLOOD, but She wants the Blood of Fuad’s Wife and Daughter as well!

           

What Have People Said about BLOOD FEAST? Find Out Below.

“I’ve often referred to BLOOD FEAST as a Walt Whitman Poem. It’s No Good, but it was the first of its Type” -Herschell Gordon Lewis

“It was the first Gore Movie….Now, it looks kind of funny, but it’s still REALLY SICK.” -Lux Interior (Horror Aficionado)

“Offensive, Nasty, Shabby, and Revolting, but also Great Fun, if You can Stand the Sight of BLOOD AND GUTS.” -Jerry Renshaw  (Austin Chronicle)

“This is One of the Most Important Releases in Film History, Ushering in a New Acceptance of EXPLICIT VIOLENCE that was Obviously just waiting to be Exploited.” -Dennis Schwartz (Ozus’ World Movie Reviews)

           

BLOOD FEAST Tag Lines Include:

  • Nothing so Appalling in the Annals of Horror!
  • ADULT HORROR!
  • Weird, Grisly Ancient Rite Horrendously Brought to Life in BLOOD COLOR!
  • You’ll Recoil and Shudder as You witness the SLAUGHTER AND MUTILATION of Nubile Young Girls-in a Weird and Horrendous Ancient Rite!

A Nightmare of PURE GORE in VIVID BLOOD COLOR!

Enjoy.

(NOTE TO READER: If You don’t want to Read all the Shit I wrote above OR are Not Totally Sure if Based on what You read if this Movie is For You RELAX. We have included the Official BLOOD FEAST Trailer for You to check Out First if Need Be.)

We Hope You Enjoyed this Splatterday Special as Much as We Did.

Thanks for Watching,

  Presented By Les Sober