The question of, in ones mind, what makes up a person’s ideally perfect partner is as old as humanity itself. The journey to find ones soul mate is the undying quest of every human past, present, and future has or will endure. The deeply ingrained desire to find the one person, on an entire planet of people that you were destined to be with keeps people perseverant and imprisoned. Once again I find myself facing the eternal question of what would comprise my ideal partner in and for life.
Now almost all men automatically put physical appearance as the number one trait that they seek in a woman first and foremost. I personally do not. In fact physical appearance comes in dead last on my list. There are a singular of physical trait that I would prefer and those would that my partner and an inch or two shorter than me or as tall as me would also suffice. I’m not one of those macho guys that feel the need to tower over their partner like King goddamn Kong . What I mean is I don’t want to be walking down the street with my partner, and have some idle idiot come up to tell me what a pretty daughter I have. The so called height requirement is not written in stone as I consider all women to be attractive no matter what society dictates. Its all about what I and only I think. I don’t give a rat’s ass about what society says I don’t cow down to advertising dictating the way people should look. Its a futile endeavor that servers more over to make people fell like shit about themselves feeding on basic human insecurities. Bottom line some cliches are cliches because their true and with that said beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Emotionally I look for two primary traits in a woman the first is that she is a passionate. As I am an artist, I appreciate and admire passion for anything in any form. I’m not talking specifically talking not just about physical passion (though I like physical passion as much as the next person), but passion in all its forms. It could be a passion for sports, reading, biking,music, B movies or whatever personal passion fuels that emotional component. I think it goes without saying that my ideal woman would be loving which is the key emotional trait I believe everyone man or woman in the world truly is seeking. No one wants to be with someone who doesn’t actually love them (or act in a loving manner) like someone who marries for money or social status for example.
When it comes to the intellect I would want (or need is a more accurate word I suppose) to be with a woman who has above average intelligence. Just a reminder to readers Intelligence and Educated are to separate animals, you can be quite intelligent without being educated. It does not matter how attractive or loving a woman is if I can’t have an intelligent conversation with her. I enjoy learning about an extremely diverse range of subjects (Buddhism, Troma Movies/independent cinema, and psychological warfare to name a few) If I’m with someone who doesn’t care, understand or can’t intellectually keep up then I know the relationship is going to be a rather ferocious failure.
The personality of my ideal partner would have to be positive as I’m a natural born pessimist, and need a partner who can counteract me negativity with their positivity. She would also need to be out going because I’m an introvert who tends to shun society as a whole, and again I’d need my partner to help provide a healthy balance between the world and myself. She must be accepting, open minded to new things and ideas as I am, and patient as I am an emotionally driven artist which means I can make life complicated, chaotic and be a bit overwhelming. My mother wrote my Wife a letter before we got married letting her know that she was glad my Wife could see my big heart underneath all the candy coated craziness as “I’m not an easy person to live with.” I do not deny it in the least as I’m fully aware I’m difficult to deal with or live with let alone marry. This is why I tell people my wife is my far better half with the patience of a saint with a heart of pure gold (which she needs to handle my daily frantic mood swings along with my constant loud ranting and raving endlessly.)
I truly do believe and feel extremely optimistic that any person has beyond excellent chances of meeting their ideal partner as long as they can be perseverant. Finding your ideal partner can take time, as its a process through trial and error. It can take years even decades, but it can be done as long as a person doesn’t become depressed and abandon all hope during the process. I’m not going to sugar coat shit it can be a grueling task finding ones ideal partner, and its no wonder that people can feel hopeless at times. But if you keep your eyes open and remain head strong through the inevitable failed relationships I fully believe anyone will find their ideal partner (in the end no matter what may occur along the way.) I was one of those people who gave up searching and fell into a sea of self pity, but as soon as I stopped obsessing about finding my ideal partner or if this person actually existed only then I found the my ideal partner. Thus its not only possible to find your ideal partner, but to find an ideal partner with every and all traits physically, emotionally, intellectually, and with the personality you desire as long as you don’t succumb to feelings of failure.
The characteristics I value the most in an ideal partner are intelligence as well as personality, as I can’t be with a woman who is not on my intellectual level because we simply wouldn’t have anything meaningful to talk or debate about, and that is something I can’t do without. Personality is the second characteristic I can’t make any exceptions on because I need someone who’s personality is the exact opposite of mine. I’ve been in relationships with women who’s personalities mirrored mine (which one would think would be perfect but its not) ,and each of those relationships in spite of the fact I thought I had found my ideal partner failed due to the fact we were too much alike. I need my ideal partners personality to be outgoing, accepting, open minded and loving or I know that the relationship is doomed from the start.
So in the end its my belief that everyone not only has an ideal partner with the specific desired characteristics, but that anyone in time will find their ideal partner no matter where they may be. Just like anything, as long as you don’t give up or break down and settle for second best, you will succeed in your quest for your perfect partner as I did.
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my thoughts on everything