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I Was A Teenage Murder Junkie pt.4: Salvation of the Streets

Mike shoved the doors of the basement delivery and much to our surprise they swung open like a $2.00 Hooker’s legs on pay day.  We bum rushed out of the confines of the basement show leaving the ensuing riot behind us. As we emptied onto the street it resembled the most messed up parade anyone could imagine. Several police cruisers were parked out front in various and precarious angles outside of the bar with their lights blazing as a handful of cops wandered around amidst the occupants of the bar. The regulars were at the outskirts of the crowd bitching about being separated from their beer and bar because of some punk kids shit show (that shouldn’t have ever been booked) as The Barfly was in deed a Bar not an actual show venue. The base of the crowd outside were not just the fan’s that attended the show, but an increasing amount of onlookers out from the shadows of the shitty streets they called home. It was quite obvious that there simply were not nearly enough police officers to accomplish much of anything accept a couple of initial arrests, and not getting killed in an already out of control situation that since they intervened seemed to only escalate more and more. Plainly put it was a numbers game and the police were well outnumbered.

Our small clan stood in a tight circle around GG who was beyond agitated and was now bordering on his usual redirect of hate against the entire fucking planet. All I remember from standing in that circle as we franticly threw together some resemblance of an escape plan that I was completely distracted by GG. Well not GG as much as the way he smelled to be more accurate. The pungent stench of stale beer, body odor, blood, feces and urine combined into a force all its own burning ones nostrils and causing ones eyes to water profusely. I have smelled rotting roadkill baking under the hellacious heat of a Texas summer heatwave that didn’t wreak nearly as bad or strongly as GG that night in the ally. The most immediate part of our plan if we were to escape unharmed in one piece and avoid incarceration was to camouflage GG like any anonymous fan. While the first responders found themselves out matched had inevitably radioed for much need back up, and GG was their main target. GG’s girlfriend grabbed a dirty bandana from out of a trash can in the ally and furiously started wiping the blood from GG’s head as well as face. The Mike contributed his leather biker jacket and one of the few other fans with donated a pair of cut off sweat pant shorts. GG took the fitly bloody bandana from Liz and fashioned it so it not only covered his shaved head but also obscured his eyes. With GG now dressed identically like one of his disenfranchised fans we slowly exited the ally into the main street. The police were to distracted by all the other bullshit going on they didn’t notice our exiting from the ally next to the bar. We started walking briskly in a tight knit group with GG on point. We made it all the half block down to the corner of the block without issue until we (moreover GG) was detected again not by the police or adoring fans, but by one of the amassed spectators on the opposite side of the street from the bar.

“GG IS FUCKING GOD!!” screamed the unknown onlooker like a fucking air siren circa World War II. Thats all it took to get the attention needed for the fans and mentality of the show to spill out onto the streets like blood from a severed artery. The fans and onlookers started to walk down the street in our direction, and unwanted attention. We managed to make it 3 blocks before GG decided to start engaging his following fans and assorted others like the onlookers. GG started by responding to the chants and screams of support which only served to rile the crowd into a further fury. We could hear the sounds of bottles breaking, trash cans being tossed and an assortment of other sounds of destruction as I began to worry that the incoming police back up might spot us thus ending our escape and starting the jailing process. GG didn’t seem to give a shit anymore as he continued to encourage the chaos. GG was leading the procession of misfits and deviants through the South Philly streets like a demented Pied Pipper leading his personal army of rats.

The only thing that finally got GG to snap back to reality and realize the true and present danger of the surrounding police was his desire to party. No surprise GG was a heavy drinker and endorsed drinking as well as drug use in any and all forms (GG also endorsed violence especially against authority) ,and his Achilles hill made him focused at the task at hand: Don’t get arrested (again) and get drunk/high. We soon realized walking wasn’t going to work as no one knew where we were or where we were going not to mention we were being escorted by a unruly gang of miscreants spreading destruction in their wake. I managed to wrestle a crumpled $20 bill from my tattered jeans and got Liz’s attention. I gave her the twenty and told her it was for cab fare to get GG out of here once and for all. We unfortunately had to walk several more blocks until we had a chance in hell of catching a cab in spite of the nights already tumultuous events. At last one of the few fans with us a small greasy guy (he was 5 foot nothing at best) with 5 o’clock shadow got ahead of us and managed to hail the only cab we had seen since arriving hours earlier. Liz jumped in the cab as fast as she possible could tugging on GG’s arm so hard it looked as if she was trying to dislocate GG’s fucking shoulder. GG paused as he entered the beat up gypsy cab and said angrily “Fuck you Philly!” and then preceded to getting the cab. As soon as GG was in the cab it took off like a bat out of hell with its ass on fire.

As I stood there watching as the cab barreled GG off into the night I thought to myself “I don’t know how the hell I ended up at a GG Allin show, but I was damn glad I came because you can’t make shit like this up.”

I Was A Teenage Murder Junkie pt.3: Here Come The Cops

As suddenly as they were switched off the stage lights burst back on. The confused and intoxicated crowd mingled around desperately trying to figure out what the fuck was going on with the on and off again lights. Just then the basement door flung open with such impact that when it slammed against the wall it sounded like a goddamn concussion grenade. The Bar/Club owner bum rushed into the room like a bull released from its pen at a rodeo. He strode to the middle of the room and promptly announced that do to “The Destructive Behavior Bullshit” and ” A Totally Fucked Up Band Lead By A Bald Degenerate Fucking Nightmare” was shutting the show down immediately. This did not bode well with the fans in the least. Instantly the Owner (and the 4 or five bouncers he had brought with him to work security, mainly his own) was plunged into a barrage of insults, violent threats, and pro GG Allin rhetoric. Needless to say the Owner made an extremely hasty retreat back upstairs to his bar. GG then took this pause in the pandemonium to address the crowd.

“Fuck is this Shit?! We want to keep playing but these motherfuckers keep cutting the power! The owner wants to shut our show the fuck down, do you want us to stop?!” GG yelled belligerently at the still awe struck audience. The unanimous answer of the crowd rang out like riot as fans screamed over each other like methhead auctioneers.

“FUCK NO!”, “GG IS GOD!”, “FUCK THIS SHIT!”, “RIOT TIME MOTHERFUCKERS!”, “WE WANT BLOOD!”, “BLOOD FOR YOU!”, “EAT MY FUCK!” and so on and so forth.

This incited GG like gasoline being pissed on a fire. GG was scowling in intense hatred apparently for everything and everybody present. GG was pacing the stage back and forth like a caged fucking animal as he quickly picked up his pace. GG grabbed a crushed beer can from the side of the stage and then used it to slash his torso preparedly  like some primitive caveman’s knife.

From what I had reseated about GG Allin this kind of shitshow common occurrence at GG’s concerts. GG Allin concerts/shows on average only lasted 15-20 minutes total before (like now) the Club owner cut the power or the venue was stormed by the police. GG had been at this point in career to be arrested 52 times for lied acts, indecent exposure, obscenity and even shitting on stage. I had watched the infamous GG Allin documentary films called “Hated: GG Allin and The Murder Junkies” by a young Todd Phillips in 1994 (a year after GG’s death due to surprise, surprise a Heroin Overdose on June 28th 1993) In the documentary GG’s older brother Merle Allin and bass player for The Murder Junkies is interviewed rather extensively throughout. In one of the interview clips Merle even states this fact further.

Merle commented that”When you went on tour (with GG) you never expect to finish the tour and thats for one of two reasons either The Hospital or Jail.” referring to the fact due to his stage show GG not only could/would be arrested , but due to his intense performances GG could also just as easily end up in the ER.

Thats when a small calvary of cops started to slowly file into the basement show venue like the fucking gestapo. Apparently the Owner had fled back upstairs and called in the cops ASAP to bail him and his Bar out of serious trouble. The crown seemed to split into to distinctly different groups this point. The one group were the ambivalent and angst filled Anarchistic fans who stood their ground while antagonizing the cops relentlessly. The second group were the polar opposite as the scrambled for any exit out of the show before getting beaten and arrested by the militant police personnel.

My buddy and coworker Chuck has decided being antiauthoritarian to the core of his basic being was siding with those who chosen to enter into the escalating conflict with the cops. Meanwhile my other friend and coworker Mike and I agreed it was in our best interest to skedaddle like our lives depended on it.

While the insanity ensued The Murder Junkies stood on the stage just a confused as anyone else caught up in the may lay. GG had abandoned the stage and immersed himself in the crowd to avoid initial detection by the conclave of cops. A handful of GG’s hardcore fans had grouped up and were now attempting to get GG out of the building before being apprehended by the asshole authorities.

 

“GG Over here, Over Here GG Come on lets get you the fuck outta here” yelled the group of hardcore fans desperately trying to get GG’s attention, and aid him in his escape from prosecution. Finally at last GG’s then girlfriend Liz (who was leading the group) managed to grab GG”s arm and redirect him. The problem was while the escape group comprised of die hard fans had united and caught up with their quarry still had no real plan for escape. The motley crew of super fans circled around GG and were aimlessly migrating through the crowd towards the stage at the back of the room (being the farthest point away from increasing police presence). Once they reached the stage GG pushed and shoved his way over to his brother Merle who was still standing on the right stage smoking a cigarette. Mike and I figured GG and his Mega Fans were experts at exactly this, and being we too wanted to bail the fuck out for the identical reason figured it be wisest to follow them. We managed to make our way through the small sea of human bumper cars to the back of the room by the left side of the stage.

By now the the fight the power fans  were locked in full on combat with the cops. Swearing at cops had turned into swinging on the cops. Beer bottles were being pelted at the police along with anything else that wasn’t bolted down. The police retaliated with excessive amount of mace and then upped the ante by taking their tazers out. As the first few fans were rendered enabled by the first wave of tazings the crowd got crazier. Fans were using chair legs and other various debris to club the cops like police piñatas. Some fans were flailing all over like snakes having seizures as the police used zip ties to restrain them. Others were continuing the chaotic carnage by battling the police, and others already detained and restrained were being led out of the show in a single file line. A security guard of the Owner had been leveled to the ground and was being mercilessly kicked and stomped by a growing gang of blood thirsty violent minded fans. The building noise was reaching a deafening level as all hell and high water had laid complete waste to any as resemblance of a concert.

Mike and I while following GG and his escape artist hardcore fans we had become stuck up against the left side of the stage. We could no longer move having been blocked in by a number of other concert goers who launched into a fan on fan full out fist fight. At this moment I looked over at Mike who shot his gaze up to the actual stage and I instantly knew what he meant. Mike hoisted himself up onto the stage accidentally bumping into the then guitarist for The Murder Junkies William Weber. Mike then helped me as clambered up on stage. The members of The Murder Junkies barely batted an eyelash at us as if to let us know they could care less who the hell we were. We weaved around behind the drum kit and the drummer Dino The Naked Drummer who was vacantly staring off into space or some shit. Once we had achieved moving across the stage Mike grabbed my arm. I asked him what the fuck could he possibly want, and thats when Mike directed my attention to behind the curtain hanging behind Dino. It was hiding the back wall where there to our enormous luck there was loading dock door. Its one of those street level doors you see walking down the street that opens from the basement of the building, and onto the street for receiving deliveries and such. This was the chink in the aggressive storm of utter anarchy that would be our escape to the freedom on the street. Just then Mike did something that surprised the shit out of me and then some. Mike fought his way over to the front right of the stage and blurted out,

“GG! GG! We can get you out right fucking now, COME ON!!”

READERS: Stay tuned For The Final Installment Of This 4 Part Piece.                       I Was A Teenage Murder Junkie pt. 4: The Salvation of the Street                 COMING SOON DATE TBD

I don’t Know What I Am, But I Know I’m Great

I live in live in the back right corner of the Cardboard Neighborhood with its four tall walls and retractable ceiling located in the Southern territory of The Closet.

I’m not Alone, though I wish I was.
My neighbors are a bunch of troglodytes to say the least.
Who are my Neighbors you ask? Well, fine I’ll tell you though it’s a waste of both of our time.
The first of my neighbors is a rather large pocket knife. PK as I call him because I don’t know or want to know his actual name.
He’s a bore. He never talks. He just periodically blurts out military slogans such as ‘Death before dishonor” and “Remember the Alamo”.
There is a gang of condoms that while still attached to each other like siamese twins are without a proper box like a bunch of savages.
All the condoms want to do is talk to the small army of naked women in the large stack of magazines where apparently clothes are forbidden.
The magazine girls and the condoms just hit on each other all day in an endless string of “Ohs” and “Ahs” .
I don’t know any of the condoms names, or the army of naked ladies names, but if I had to make an educated guess I’d say that they all appear to be called “Baby”.
I can survive my asinine neighbors because I am special.
Those outside the cardboard confines of the neighborhood call me The Big Bad Boy.
They claim I can take your head off like a shotgun.
Thus I think its safe to assume I am in fact royalty.
Yet if you’re not convinced of my awe inspiring greatness then you can choke on this.
I’m the only one in the neighborhood who gets invited to the land of giants.
At least twice a day the giant named Tim comes and collects me.
I believe Tim is the leader of this particular group of giants.
Once in a while it’s just me and Tim hanging out, this again proves my greatness as I’m the only one the giant Tim consults in private behind the curtain of his court.
Most of the time though when Tim comes to collect me he is surrounded by his fellow giant friends who play second fiddle to Tim.
Tim lifts me out of the cardboard neighborhood and carries me to the bathroom, as it is called, yet I have not seen a single giant taking a bath in all these long years.
The Giant Tim turns on a metal appendage protruding from something called a sink.
Tim then fills my belly full of cold, crisp, clean water.
The cool water flows directly down into my awaiting belly via my mouth which is always agape.
Then Tim takes me back to the land of giants which I like to refer to as Timsland.
Tim places me on a low circular table which his friend giants are sitting around so that they may admire me.
I’m the most stunning centerpiece these giants have ever known.
After a few minutes of idle chit chat the giant Tim along with his friends take turns filling my belly button with various exotic and quite aromatic plants with names like “Grape Ape” or “OG Kush”
I suppose these are gifts paying tribute to me and all that I am.
Then the truly grand party begins.
Giant Tim lights sweet smelling sticks called Intense I believe due to the pungent trails of smoke that drift from its end when exposed to fire.
Tim then plays the music of other giants I’ve never met with strange and exotic names like Metallica, Slayer, and Anthrax at a rather high volume.
Tim then sits down with his fellow giants around the table.
He takes a small combustable device and creates a small flickering flame.
He then holds the small flame up to my belly button and sets the exotic plant, given to me as a tribute, on fire.
As the plant smolders in my belly button Tim inhales the smoke through my entire body and out through a rather large hole in my head.
After I make my rounds the giants are pleased with me and agree I am something referred to as “Cool as shit” which is obviously another dubious title for me affirming I am royalty even more so.
The giants then lounge around Timsland eyes half closed in satisfaction.
They giggle, laugh, smile and thoroughly enjoy themselves in my company.
Still, things are not always so copacetic in Timsland.
Timsland is under constant threat by an even larger female giant known as an Adult.
Sometimes during the parties the Adult summons Tim and Tim makes a frantic exit while the other giants look on anxiously.
But it can get even worse I tell you.
Sometimes the Adult storms into Timsland and crashes the party she wasn’t invited to.
When the Adult invades Timsland Tim immediately hides me from view.
I believe this is because the larger Adult wants to capture me for my endless greatness and take me far away from Timsland to serve only her.
Tim being the smaller of the two giants would not fair well in a physical confrontation so he must hide me so I can’t be confiscated by the Adult threat.
One day the Adult found where Tim was hiding me.
The Adult was enraged at Tim keeping her from me and she then kidnapped me.
I was thrown into a prison known as The basement were I was confined to an old luggage trunk.
I spent my days longing for Tim to come and steal me back and take me to Timsland to be properly celebrated.
Days turned into months and I was convinced I was abandoned or perhaps exiled by the angry Adult.
I had given up all hope as my days of glory were far gone.
That was until the Adult came to collect me and fill my belly with cold, crisp, clean water.

I Will Never Forget How To Stand On My Head By Spacedog

I tenderly caressed the back of his head. My arm was still bleeding though so I had to stop.

Another vein gone.

Another dream lost.

I told him I loved him and he replied with the same in turn. It was cold and vacant, a blizzard of deceipt, a blizzard of discontent. We were chained together by our frivolity, linked together but nothing else.

He was the prize I had won at the carnival of malaise, a trinket I picked up at a child’s lemonade stand. Oh but how the lemonade grew bitter in taste and pungent in stench. Still I showed off my trinket like rappers show off their bling and socialites show off their fine china. I knew I was buying damaged goods from the beginning yet this did not matter. This trinket, he was a challenge
and I for one have great difficulty in backing down from those, no matter the price my soul might pay.

After time though, my senses slowly returned to me. The darkness seeped out of my pores and I had no more need for my fallen angel. The ideals of brute intimidation, frigid love, and penetrating midgets no longer matched that of my own. So the tie was severed. The bond was broken. I moved on.

I had lost my way but I still knew how to stand on my head and flip my life around and be done.

I will never forget how to stand on my head. I have countless times.

Why?

Sometimes there is never an answer for why we do what we do. People ask us and we try to discern what is best in our heads at the time. I was asked by many a friend, why him, why that man. It fulfulled the need of accomplishment in me at the time.

Instant gratification. I wanted it to be the deepest depths of the ocean, when in my head I knew it was the kiddie pool.

These are all just guesses to me now. I do not know the person I was back then. He is different then the one I am today. I am just speculating. The aspects of my persona change daily. I am still the same deep at my core. But the person who wakes up out of bed with me each and every morning, he is different. The surface does not always match the depths.

So why do we swim in the kiddie pool when we all want the ocean? Why?

Your Health Insurance is Financially Raping You To Death

The Fairytale History of Health Insurance:

Health Insurance would provide a service where the client sends in Monthly checks for your entire life. When the client needs, Hospitalization, Surgery, ER Emergency, Illness, Doctor Visits, Specialists, Medications etc. the insurance company uses the clients money to cover any medical issue. Of course the Health Insurance Companies would charge a reasonable fee for their services since they deal directly with your doctors and medical institutions.

What The Hell Happened?

Health Insurance Companies realized the more money the refused to pay the richer they became, and they sold their souls to the Deity of the Dollar.    The Health Insurance Companies started restricting its coverage, constantly increasing rates, and finding ways TO NOT PAY YOUR CLAIM.

Health Insurance Companies employ a whole fucking department of people who’s only job is to review client claims and FIND ANY REASON/LOOPHOLES so your Healthcare Provider WON’T HAVE TO PAY YOUR CLAIM, essentially doing the opposite of its intended purpose.

Seriously the Health Insurance’s business model wouldn’t work for any other business because people wouldn’t use it and it’d go bankrupt. What other industry or company or product maker raises their prices periodically all year, every year WHILE REDUCING THE SERVICES.

Would you tolerate your local grocery store say constantly increasing the price of Milk for instance and at the same time giving you less milk for your money. If your grocer continued raising the price of a gallon of Milk from today’s current price of $2.25 up to$3.75 ,and then a month later to $6.00 and then $7.99 next month and so on all year long. BUT not only is your grocer raising the price but SIMULTANEOUSLY your grocer would be giving less Milk for the Money. See as the price goes up you’d get less Milk at first it be just a little under a gallon then 2/3 of a gallon, and then only half a gallon at newly inflated GALLON Milk prices.

Then there’s The Deductible which is one of the greatest and greediest scams in Health Insurance History. The deductible works as follows. You pay a set amount of money out of your own pocket for your medical care WHILE SENDING A CHECK EVERY MONTH TO YOUR HEALTH INSURANCE PROVIDER. Can you say “Legal Double Billing”?! That be the equivalent of taking your car to your mechanic and he makes you fix the car yourself (using your labor and cash for needed parts) and then giving you a bill for the repair. ITS FUCKING INSANE THAT PEOPLE PUT UP WITH THIS CORRUPT CAPITALISTIC GREED LIKE THIS EVERY DAY.

I will once again use a Bullet Point format for the rest.

  1. My Aunt Ellington needed a hip replacement, and put it off for years in spite of the fact they she had what is considered a good health care provider. She asked me politely not to name the Health Insurance Company and out of respect for her I won’t. She knew the out of pocket would be a significant amount of money. She finally had the surgery and it cost a total of $117,000. Her insurance company paid only $17,000 leaving her with a $100,000 in medical bills, AND THEY STILL WANTED THEIR MONTHY PAYMENTS.
  2. I had a best friend in high school named Brooklyn Billy Bob who I still talk to sporadicly to this day. Right before I met Brooklyn Billy Bob his family had just moved in with his grandmother not by choice but necessity. The family didn’t have a lot of money to speak of. During the long moving process Brooklyn Billy Bob’s dad, who had a serious health issue pertaining to his heart, couldn’t afford his heart medication. As a result Brooklyn Billy Bob’s dad DIED because he couldn’t pay for his LIFE SAVING MEDICATION.
  3. Pharmaceutical companies who work hand in hand with your Health Insurance Company DO NOT CREATE CURES, THEY CREATE CLIENTS. Think for a second on how the Pharmaceutical companies are COMMERCIALIZING YOUR HEALTH FOR PROFIT.
  4. Lets not forget the American Government whose politicians make MILLIONS on Health Insurance and Pharmaceutical companies Lobbyists HAVE INSTATED A $2,500 YEARLY FINE if you DON’T have (lets be honest its if you don’t pay for) Health Insurance.
  5. When I went to rehab for a vicious heroin addiction which SAVED MY LIFE my Doctor had to call/talk to my Health Insurance Provider DAILY because they wanted to booted out asap so they wouldn’t have to pay any more claims. My Doctor had to LIE TO HELP SAVE MY LIFE. Each day my doctor got on the phone with my Health Insurance Provider and had to lie so I didn’t get kicked out because my Health Insurance Provider didn’t want to pay to cover my again LIFE SAVING treatment. My Doctor was smart he knew I COULDN’T be removed from Rehab IF i was either SUICIDAL or HOMICIDAL (the rule is simply you can’t be taken out of treatment for Insurance reasons if your a threat to yourself or others). My Doctor did this dance for 17 days and I did end up getting released early because of the bullshit with my Health Insurance Provider (who ultimately got what they wanted which was ending treatment asap)
  6. EVEN WORSE my Wife is an RN who works in the Drug Addiction field and the Insurance vs. Rehab War continues. Since the dawn of Drug Rehab Health Insurance companies have been trying with all their financial might to DENY ALL ADDICTS LOOKING FOR HELP. The Insurance Companies HATE REHAB because unfortunately addicts relapse and may need more help to stay clean and healthy. Insurance claims this “Revolving Door” of the Rehab field justifies NOT PAYING ANYONES REHAB CLAIMS EVER AGAIN. The war has raged for decades, BUT finally the Insurance Companies have started to win. They have rearranged protocols in their favor. Example there is a treatment evaluation used when a patient is admitted to a rehab that gauges their current physical health from 1-10 with 10 being the worst. The Insurance companies have announced that if a patient comes in to be admitted if their symptoms are 1-5 THEY AREN’T PAYING because in their opinion aren’t in actual need of medical help. They are also making medical institutions write EVER THING in a patients medical chart 3 requiring the ENTIRE treatment teams signatures. This is a way to encourage little mistakes by the staff that the Insurance Companies can then use to DENY THE PATIENT CARE. This will create a massive social problem. If drug addicts can’t get help the keep using, and if they keep using they keep lying, cheating, stealing, robbing and scaring to feed their habit before it ends their life prematurely. Its bad enough our prisons are over crowed due to drug offenses (such as possession) that has created a over crowding situation. This over crowding allows NEW OR REPEAT VIOLENT OFFENDERS being brought into the prison system to be released extremely early because there is no place to put them. The fact is drug addicts should be sentenced to Rehab NOT PRISON, Addiction is called a disease BUT its actually a treatable Metal Disorder.
  7. One thing a that baffles me in the Health Insurance field is they DON’T PROVIDE FERTILITY COVERAGE FOR WOMAN OR MEN. The Insurance Companies will chip in once a woman is pregnant. WHATS WEIRD is Health Insurance Companies are GREEDY AS FUCK so why wouldn’t they cover fertility?! MY POINT if a couple has a kid then the kids going to need Health Insurance and thus get added to their parents policy and then at 18 they have to pay for their own policy. So kids equal customers and customers equal cash.
  8. When I had Hepatitis C which if untreated will end your life painfully and prematurely I saw a Specialist who was a fucking godsend, a miracle in the form of a man. There at the time I was seeking treatment a slew of new and more effective Hep-C drugs hitting the market. It was because the FDA was pumping cash into the Hep-C drugs after they announced the #1 health problem facing America was Liver Transplants. My Doctor researched EVERY drug and decided one a 2 medication combo that had virtually NO SIDE EFFECTS (up till VERY recently the only treatment for Hep-C was Interferon injections which have the identical side effects as Chemotherapy causing a whopping 91% of prior patients to end treatment before completing the course of Interferon ) AND IT COULD CURE HEP-C as opposed to possibly wrestling it into submission like Cancer. Well no surprise my Health Insurance Provider wasn’t at all happy about my treatment plan. My Specialist called my Health Insurance Provider and managed to get them to clear his treatment plan for me by USING THEIR GREED AGAINST THEM. His argument simply was this by biting the bullet and paying for my treatment NOW then I’d live a full lifetime which meant my Health Insurance Provider would continue to get monthly checks much longer. Bottomline Dead People DON’T FUCKING PAY FOR HEALTH INSURANCE HEALTHY PEOPLE DO.
  9. JUST YESTERDAY I went to my local pharmacy to pick up my medication and was told the price was $131.00 when I was paying $10 with my HUMANA Insurance plan. The Pharmacist told me my  HUMANA insurance card expired so I thought it was no big deal I’d just have to order a new one. I called  HUMANA my Insurance Provider as soon as I got home, and the representative informed me my Health Insurance had been CANCELLEd AS OF JANUARY 31ST.. I’ve been with that Insurance company 14-15 years and NEVER missed a single payment. So as you can image I was in a state of shock, awe and serious confusion. I asked the representative why and he proceeded to duck my question for an hour before finally coming up with this statement “HUMANA is NO LONGER providing the plan I was insured under in my area.” I asked him what the fuck that meant as thats not a proper answer and to me made no fucking sense at the time. Again he would answer fully and just kept repeating his “NO LONGER IN YOUR AREA” statement so I hung the fuck up. I immediately called back and asked the second representative the question of what the previous statement meant. She had no problem answering me and said with out a pause “HUMANA IN FACT HAD DECIDED TO NOT INSURE ANYONE ANY MORE IN MY ENTIRE STATE.” This means 100’s of thousands or more people LOST THEIR HUMANA/HUMANA ONE HEALTH INSURANCE COVERAGE BY NO FAULT OF THEIR OWN. Bottomline HUMANA/HUMANA ONE decided to stop providing coverage for the ENTIRE STATE because it was a “High Claims State” and what do Health Insurance Companies hate? Yup PAYING YOUR HEALTH INSURANCE CLAIMS.
  10. SHOP AROUND! While Health Insurance is a Scam based on FEAR and GREED you should opt for the lesser of all the evils, and by evils I mean the Health Insurance Companies. I got dropped by HUMANA due to HUMANA’S GROWING NEED FOR GREED, but in the end I got NEW plan with BLUE CROSS BLUE SHIELD with not only the SAME COVERAGE for LESS MONEY and FULL DENTAL & OPTICAL which I never had with HUMANA/HUMANA ONE.

In Summation the Salvation of Health lies in Social Medicine. I know back in the early days when the American politicians where debating The Affordable Care Act the greedy unethical and immoral GOP launched a propaganda campaign demonizing social medicine. The claims the Republicans made WERE ABSOLUTELY FALSE it was a blatant fear tactic to scare the American public into submission and it worked. Why did it work so well?

Americans believe whatever they hear now a days instead of thinking about them first. A pivotal point in the propaganda was social medicine would increase taxes, BUT IF the American public had stopped and done the math they would easily see the tax would be FAR LESS THEN THE CURRENT PRIVATE HEALTH INSURANCE COVERAGE.

If you remember my Aunt got stuck with $100,000 medical bill AFTER HER HEALTH INSURANCE PAID THEIR PART ($17,000 out of at total cost of $117,000) SO I ask you which costs more a tax increase or a $100,000 medical bill after being fucked over by your Health Insurance Provider?!

Its unAmerican that Capitalism now dictates your health care. You pay or you SUFFER and you pay or you DIE. We have the doctors, facilities, treatments, and medications that could help heal people BUT we will let them SUFFER AND DIE because MONEY IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN PEOPLE.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Hypocrisy Of MTV And The American Viewer

Many moons ago at this point MTV (or better known back in the day as Music Television because 1,000 years ago they actually played music videos 24-7) aired a American remake of the British hit show “Skins” that followed a group of high school friends daily lives, interactions, relationships and so on.

Now again its fucking funny how here in America we tout our FREEDOM OF SPEECH allowed us by the 1st Amendment, BUT then the government creates the FCC (Federal Communications Commission) who’s sole job is to censor tv, radio, print news and are attempting, and failing so far miserably to say the least, the Internet via Social Media.

The FCC is not the only one to blame for its the American public that likes to think we are culturally evolved, and armed with the 1st Amendment we believe we are a socially open and accepting of art in any form. This couldn’t be farther from the truth.

In the original British version the teens portrayed in the show did engage in Smoking Pot (which in America is legal in 25 states or 1/2 of America) ,and TOTALLY illegal in Briton though their attitude towards Marijuana has always be more liberal and lax then in American historically speaking.

The teenage characters also drank beer/booze freely, BUT remember in Briton the legal drinking age is 18. Not to mention Alcohol is the 1st intoxicant (fact Google it) teens try first. Though in the Pharmaceutical age Pills are replacing alcohol at an alarming rate, but thats another story.

The High School characters (played by high school age kids, not 20-30 somethings pretending to be high school students like Beverly Hills 90210 bullshit, or 21 Jump Street) surprise, surprise have sex. NOW this is not to say or imply gratuitous sex complete with nudity. In fact the scenes were no more offensive than a basic American movie love scene or tamer even. You see the teens start to hook up kissing and shit, and then the camera fadeout or transitions to the next scene. You also at times saw the teen couple lying in bed (completely covered again NO NUDITY) after having sex, BUT you NEVER saw the teens actually having simulated sex with each other.

MTV saw the popularity of the show in Briton and decided since Hollywood has died due to being void of new ideas/creative concepts that they’d just take a British hit show, Americanize it, and enjoy the high ratings. That never even came close to happening. What did happen was the American public went absolutely apeshit and caused a massive public backlash. Americans were horrified by the drinking, appalled at the Pot smoking ,and utterly repulsed even by the idea of FICTIONAL TEEN TV SHOW CHARACTERS hooking up in ANY way what so ever.

There 2 issues I have with the American public on this subject. One being the age old conundrum of sex vs. violence. American’s bitch constantly about violence on tv (and every where else for that matter) BUT when it comes to sex violence becomes acceptable. George R.R. Martin once said in an interview about his hit HBO series “Game of Thrones” (based on his books) “It never stops amazing me how on the show people get angry over the showing of a naked breast when in the next scene a mans head is cut in half with a Battle Ax in extremely graphic detail.” I couldn’t agree more Americans are hypocritical when it comes to sex, violence or both.

The second issue I have is with the American public AND MTV. The American Public freaked the fuck out over “Skins” subject matter and portrayal of teens sex lives, BUT heres the HYPOCRISY. While enraged at the behavior of FICTIONAL characters the American public had no problem with MTV’s other show “16 and Pregnant”. The show “16 and Pregnant” was a reality tv show that followed REAL LIFE UNDERAGE PREGNANT TEEN MOTHERS, their families, their friends , and occasionally the TEENAGE FATHER.

If Americans claim to be free yet their actually restricted as fuck, and the American public are NOT socially enlightened at all in fact their predominately MENTAL MIDGETS offended by damn near everything. So how the hell do Americans justify condemning a FICTIONAL SHOW because of its content and because of how it could influence/affect American teens in real life, BUT fully endorse and embrace a tv show that damn near glamorized underage high school pregnancies?!

What the fuck is exactly wrong with Americans who claim to be accepting but are ANYTHING but based on American social norms?!

END THE HYPOCRISY AND TRULY UTILIZE THE FIRST FUCKING AMENDMENT. The world s full of sex, drugs, drinking, and socially unacceptable behavior so restricting Television shows based on “objectionable” content won’t accomplish a fucking thing.

CENCORSHIP IS UNAMERICAN.

FIGHT THE FCC.

FUCK HYPOCRACY IN ALL ITS FORMS.

Less Sober Begrudgingly On Less Sober

Ask and You shall receive they say well I hold more with the saying be careful for what you wish for because you might just get it. In this case in particular Your Gonna Get It Ladies and Gentlemen. I fully understand especially in the age of social media dominated by millennials that someone attracts the exact attention I don’t want. See the less you say about yourself now a days the more ravenous the curiosity of others grows and abounds. So for those who wanted to know so goddamn bad that they annoyed me to the edge of sanity this ones for you so with that said I don’t want to hear anymore personal questions about me from here out.

Here some facts in Bullet Note form:

Age: Old enough to be considered Ancient.

Looks: Like a Basic Human with 10 and 2 of everything required.

Right or Left Handed: Ambidextrous

Education: Street Smarts with a Collage Education.

Occupation/Vocation: Writer/Expert Cryptozoologist on Chupacabras.

Salary: I’m chronically broke, but I can pay my bills.

Social Status: Social Deviant

Marital Status: Married to my Wife

Ethnicity: Unknown due to the fact that if I were a dog breed I’d be a Ethnic Mutt.

Accent: Slight Southern Accent that slips in occasionally.

Tricks: Getting people to buy any absurdity based on Reasonable Doubt

Polotics: I agree with George Washington when he said “A Two Party System will DESTROY AMERICA.

Hobbies: Sharpening my knife collection or cleaning my guns while thinking about people I hate.

Addictions: Ex Junkie, Heavy Drinker, Fast Food, Death, Doom and Destruction, People Watching.

Pot Smoker: Yes daily

Social Media Used: Twitter and FaceBook only for Blog Promotion nothing else.

Obsessions: Sociology, Death Metal, Horror Movies, My Dogs & Snakes, Revenge, Under Dogs, Anything Anti Authority, The Occult, and more.

Beliefs: I do not believe in organized religion of any kind, I prefer Spirituality. I also fully endorse Karma.

Superstitions: Murphy’s Law, It’ll Get You Ever Time Without Fail.

Attitude (General): Stubborn, Aggressive, Impulsive, Opinionated, Demanding, High expectations of others and most of all self, Vengeful at times, Anger bordering Rage (Terrible Temper), Sceptic, Natural Born Pessimist, little to no Patience, open minded, Sarcastic, Trust Worthy, Loyal to a Fault, Witty, Entertaining, and Extreme Story Teller to name just a few.

Prejudices: I hate the Rich, The Police, The Government and any Institution of Authority such as the FCC. I hate millennials with a undying passion. I hate technology but use it as it becomes a necessity because the public integrates it into social life. I hate big pharmaceutical companies, Lobbyists, Politicians, The Legal System, Taxes, The Health Care System, Large Corporations, Bullies of any kind,  SUVs, Rules and most Laws. Think thats enough to list for now.

Ambitions: To make a comfortable living as a writer and to get this Weblog financially self sustaining. Becoming a Marijuana Millionaire in the Medical/Recreational Marijuana industry. (It be nice to get paid for what I know as opposed to be sent to prison for it.)

Medical History: I had Hep-C and was treated making a 100% recovery. I have never broken a bone, BUT I’ve had more stitches then I can count, and I had my Appendix removed TWICE (but thats another story all together)

Sex: I was born with a penis so obviously Male.

Fears: There will never be justice.

Pets: English Bulldog, French Bulldog, Miniature Dachshund (who is completely deaf and only has 1/2 her vision in her left eye) Ball Python, and a Colombian Rainbow Boa Constrictor. Also 3 evil ass cats.

Tattoos/Piercings: No Piercings, 6 Tattoos with plans for many more

Handwriting: Shitty, my handwriting makes Doctor’s handwriting look legible.

Friends: Small Handful of people I have met throughout my life. I generally dislike people and avoid them a great deal.

Personality Type: EXTREMELY Introverted

Favorite Movie: The Toxic Avenger

Favorite Singer: Chris Barns (formally of Cannibal Corpse now with 6 Feet Under)

Favorite Band: Currently for the last 3 years or so Ghost (also known as Ghost BC in America due to copyright laws)

Hometown: Cliche USA

Currently Living: In Parts Unknown to Man and Beast

Country of Origin: Antartica

Astrological Sign: Maximus

Personal Heros: Nicola Machiavelli, Nicola Tesla, Vlad the Impaler, Genghis Khan, Hunter S. Thompson, Lloyd Kaufman, George Remero, Les Claypool, Tobe Hooper, Eli Roth, Doug Benson, Sam Kinison, Samuel Jackson, G.G. Allin, Kevin Smith, Kevin Spacey, Ron Jeremy, Popcorn Sutton, Johny Cash, Tommy Chong, Scortese, Dr. Ray, Jerry Springer, Doyle, Merle Allin, Dave Brockie (aka Oderus Urungus), Mr. Lordi, Werner Herzog, Micheal Jordan, Cliff Burton, Clive Barker, Wes Craven, and thats plenty for this piece.

Favorite Color: Black (the absence of color)

Favorite Song: Bite It You Scum by G.G. Allin & The Murder Junkies

Siblings: Yes 1 younger brother Moore Sober

Instruments: Used to play Bass guitar, but gave it up along with my teenage dreams of being a rock star.

Height: The National Average for my demographic

Weight: Could stand to lose 3-5 pounds.

Sports: I do not play any sports and am anything but a sports fan.

High School: Ignorant High

Favorite book: Tie between “1984” and “Animal Farm”

Favorite Place: Inside my own head

 

 

Its All A Matter Of Perspective

I just bought a new property somewhere in Podunkville East Cackalacki and hired a new contractor (not new per say he’s worked with my family on a myriad of projects, but this is the 1st time he will be working with us) named Rock EnRoll. When I was returning home I texted Rock the following text:

“The side gate by the pond in open”

All that meant was exactly what it said as its only value is face value.

Rock called back in less than 90 seconds and was all worked up talking so fast all I heard was his thick as tar southern accent. I was a tad bit stoned and rather exhausted so I handed the phone to my Wife stating to Rock she was the one who locked the property up.

As it turns out Rock doesn’t text and a rule of thumb is you shouldn’t text Rock. This is because in this small part of the country people keep their fucking cell phones in their pockets out in public (that includes placing their phone on table as if to say, “I swear I won’t check it every 2 fucking seconds to see if I got a text or a fucking FaceBook like for the picture of my goddamn dog in a cowboy hat.”) Now due to this technology differential Rock, among many if not almost all, have no idea or concept on/for interpreting the context of the text. I’ll explain.

Rock received the text, read it and interpreted it as some James Bond 007 super secret 911 code for an emergency AND he needed his help immediately. Why did he draw this conclusion I have truly no idea to be blatantly honest.

I mean when Rock read it did he possible think one or more of the following issues was at hand:

  1. My Wife or I had had a severe and most likely life threatening accident.
  2. There were hostile renegade poachers attacking from the cover of the woods.
  3. A Home Invasion was going down complete with guys in ski masks and machine guns
  4. My Wife and I were battling insane Moonshiner’s over still site(s)
  5. Ali Baba and his 40 thieves were attempting to steal shit.
  6. Wife and I were being “TAKEN” by Liam Neeson.
  7. Wife and I were being abducted by Aliens.
  8. Viciously rabid woodland creatures were surrounding my Wife and I.
  9. The house was engulfed in flame and my Wife and I were stuck upstairs.
  10. My Wife, The House and I were being swallowed up by a sinister sink hole.
  11. Leatherface was running at us with his  Chainsaw revving up like a fighter jet engine.
  12. The Hills Have Eyes.
  13. Cannibals were trying to kill us and turn us into BBQ.
  14. Bigfoot was real and holding us hostage.
  15. My Wife and I were in fact secret agents for the CIA and were being targeted by either the drug cartels, mafias, gangs, terrorists or foreign evil governments, and needed impromptu assistancte/help.

That though is only the first part, the second being the gate open part. If we were in fact in immediate danger of some sort why the hell didn’t we say so?! You’d think in an emergency we’d texted “HELP!”, “HELP US”, “911 EMERGENCY!”, “ACCIDENT! Need Help” or “Come Quick we’re in life threatening danger!!” but I didn’t text anything remotely like that that could be misinterpreted or at least that what I thought when I sent the text.

What about the gate being open?! Did Rock think this message of the gate by the pond is open was code for “Help Us, Come Quick! the side gate is open so you can access the property and swoop in and save us from whatever the hell you think the trouble is!”

Well I will never know how a simple one sentence text was thought to be a coded plea for help in a direly dangerous and potentially violent emergency , BUT I did learned my lesson, NO MORE TEXTING ROCK.

Sexual Ambiguity By Spacedog

Subject Contradictions:
He takes his coat off as he slowly enters the room. A swift, precise glance of the inhabitants reveals copious laughter but their smiles are nylon. This is unamusing to him so he creeps out the back door.

He sees a child drop an ice cream cone and begin to cry.

He sees a parapelegic ringing her little bell and sitting on the sidewalk. He wonders where her wheelchair went?

He hears a train whistle but sees no tracks.

He steps in a big wad of horse shit and walks with a more pronounced anger.

Walking further down the narrow roadway, he spots a man and woman arm in arm. Every four steps or so the woman takes she gazes a loving glance at this man. The man gazes back at her but in the exact moment she looks away, he lustfully gazes at the ass of the man in front of them.

He walks down the street and wonders when his chance will be. When he will be the ass that they gaze upon. He’s a virgin though and waiting for marriage. Then he remembers that he is gay.

Wait! We can’t marry!

So he decides to take matters into his own hands. He turns around abruptly. He takes off his shirt. He is cold and his nipples harden, among other things. He walks back into the room.

I need something acceptable, he thinks. He turns his nose to the air. He smells alcohol, roses, and faint scents of sex. He walks towards those of course. He realizes it is darker in the corner of the room. Someone motions him into a doorway.

He enters the room.

Twenty minutes later…….

He’s no longer a virgin. He goes home.

Believe it or not there is a point to the story. It really has nothing to do with sex but sex gets people’s attention for the most part. All the things which are “forbidden” to us when we are children do. Sex, drugs, alcohol, crime, purposefully hurting others.

I have dabbled into all of the above. A lot of them quite often. Never all of them at the same time. You grow out of one bad habit and there is always another. We all have them. If we are defined by them and ruled by them therein lies the problem.

So I don’t care what people do in their own time. Each of the things I mentioned above have their risks and their rewards. As adults we know what they are. We still do them though. We have sex until we get the HIV or anally seep or walk a little funny. We do drugs until we have no more veins or no more teeth. We drink alcohol til we need a liver transplant and then we get a new liver and drink some more. We evade taxes, invade minors, and jaywalk. We hurt others and then we are hurt and then they are hurt and it goes around in one big limitless circle like Simba and his fuckin pathetic Circle of Life.

Then we go to church and we pray and put on our Easter bonnets and some of go home and celebrate Jesus and some the Cadburry bunny, while others still just go off and celebrate their birthday suits together. One big happy family.

Then we go feed the homeless. Then we hop a train to the city in the clothing we just bought at the Salvation Army and go panhandle.

After that we pick up our grandmother to go to bingo. She sits there contently. Dabber in one arm, flask in the other, bible in her purse. She sees another 70 year old man there, one with all his teeth, and promptly leaves you to dab balls by yourself. Apparently grandma knows a lot more about balls then you thought.

It never ends. It is eternal, it is disturbing but it’s not. We all do it. Extreme or miniscule. It exists.

“This is the biggest mistake I could think would save me. I wanted to give up the idea I had any control. Shake things up. To be saved by chaos. To see if I could cope, I wanted to force myself to grow again. To explode my comfort zone.” -Chuck Palahniuk

I have so been there. Ripping myself apart just so I could see myself bleed and try to fix things. That’s human.

And that’s why even though people are flawed to a repulsive extent, they deserve a chance in my book. Otherwise we would all be sitting alone by ourselves in caves, fleshlight in one hand (ummmm i guess dildos for all the bottoms and women out there) and a bottle of whiskey in the other. 🙂