Category: Uncategorized

How the Hell do We Know its all Uncategorized?!

Extreme Grindcore: C+NT BUTCHER

A While Back My Path Crossed Once Again with that of My Long Time High School Friend  Bluejetski whoI hadn’t Talked to in God Knows How Years. We are Both Massive Music Fans Who’s Tastes Lie Predominately Outside of the Mainstream Commercial Happy Horse Shit. I have always liked Extreme Forms of Music such as Death Metal, Industrial, Heavy Metal, Black Metal, Hardcore Punk, Grindcore, and Horrorcore for Example. Once We had Reconnected  We immediately picked up Where We left Off just as if We had Never Stopped Talking To Each other to Begin with. It wasn’t Long Before We got on the Topic of Music, and were Manically Swapping Bands/Artists Names that We had come Across Over the Years since We last Spoke.

One of My Favorite Bands since My High School Years to this Very Day is The Notoriously Offensive American Grindcore Band Anal Cunt Founded By Grindcore Legend Seth Putnam. Bluejetski told Me that I Should Check Out ,If I hadn’t Already, the Band Cunt Butcher Who were Australia’s Answer to Anal Cunt so to Speak. The Band Cunt Butcher was Founded By the Musician  Carcass Butcher (Real Name Marcus Kapitza), but that Wasn’t All there was More to Contend with. Blujetski then went on to Inform Me that (in Spite of being in the Golden Age of the Internet) Cunt Butcher was so Obscure that Not Even the Google Gods could Help Me that Much. Well He Wasn’t Kidding that’s for Sure. There is Virtually NO Photos, Interviews, Live Show Footage, or Songs by Cunt Butcher (or Carcass Butcher/Marcus Kapitza) fucking Anywhere and We Scraped the Hell Out of the Internet. We are Literally Posting Everything We managed to Uncover Online here in this Very fucking Post.

               

WHO/WHAT IS CUNT BUTCHER?!

Cunt Butcher was a Grindcore Band, Formed in 2004 in Sydney, Australia and was Later Based in Brisbane. Originally Cunt Butcher was an Experimental Solo Bass Project in Offensive but Catchy Grindcore for Musician Carcass Butcher with Two Goals in Mind. The First Goal was to Create the Heaviest Most Aggressive Music Humanly Possible using Only Bass Guitars, and Secondly to Entertain and Offend by Bringing the Element of Danger and Controversy back to Grindcore. Cunt Butchers music is Chauvinistic, Racist, Sexist, Meat Eating, Pornographic, Beer Swilling, Violent Hate Driven Grindcore with all of the Politically Incorrect Bullshit that Pervades the Genre. Its Simply Being Offensive as Possible to Create the Maximum Amount of Shock and Awe from Critics and Fans Alike.

Needless to say Cunt Butcher went through Several Lineup Changes and Configurations  Over the Years. For Almost Two Years Carcass and Second Bass Player Cadburry Redbeard, Together with a Drum Machine, Terrorized the Sydney Live Music Scene with Raw Meat, Islamic Blowup Dolls, Pigs, Nudity, Blood (Both Human and Animal) and Assorted Other Fluids, as Well as Playing some Ultra Politically Incorrect Grindcore in Between. By Late 2008, after Numerous Drunken Post-Gig Incidents, the Relationship Between Carcass and Cadbury Turned Sour. The Band Broke Up Temporarily and Carcass left Sydney for Brisbane.

               

Carcass was Offered a Show on September 11, 2009, just One Year after a Similar Show caused a Huge Shit Storm of a Fight in Sydney , with Student Unions, Both Jewish and Islamic Groups, and All the Left Wing PC Assholes in Town doing Everything They could to get the Venue to Ban Cunt Butcher and Eventually They Succeeded. Given another Opportunity, Carcass Reformed the Band with Former Invocation and current Dreamkillers Drummer KKKrist, and took to the Stage Dressed as a Terrorist with Hilarious Results, Culminating with a Series of Brawls between  Crowds of Drunken Metalheads and Scummy Punks out in From of the Venue.

Cunt Butcher’s Gigs were so Extremely Rare due to Venues and Promoters being very Reluctant to Book the Band due to Their Outrageous Live Show Reputation. The Band’s Shows were also the Only Actual Way of getting Hold of Cunt Butcher’s Recorded Works that was with the Exception of the Album ALLAH SHARMUTA which Carcass Butcher completed Recording just Three Days before His Untimely Death on November 18th, 2014. Carcass wanted to hand out the Album for Free at a Cunt Butcher Live Show, But Due to His Death the Show was Never to Be. After Carcass’s Demise ALLAH SHARMUTA was Posted for Free Online out of Respect to Carcass as well as Cunt Butcher Fans.

               

Posted Below:

  • The Whole Set from a 2008 Live Show
  • The Whole Set from a 2010 Live Show
  • Allah Sharmuta (FULL ALBUM)
  • a Song From an Appearance at The Station Hotel
  • A Song from Musicland in 2011

Enjoy.

 

Thanks For Reading/Watching/Listening,

Presented By    Les Sober & FYB   

(Pt110Am)

The Purity Knight Murder Controversy (Police Footage Found)

We been sitting on this Little Oddity for Quite a While having Allocated it to the Preverbal Back Burner if You Will. This Tormented Tale has Not One, BUT Two Twists So You Don’t want to Miss that Shit Trust Us. Honestly the Second is the so called Big Twist, but You may opt to Not watch the Video and just Read the Rest. It’s Up to You.

  • In 1997 a Young Woman by the Name of Purity Knight and Her Roommate where having a Growing Problem with a Unknown Stalker.
  • One Night Knight’s Neighbor Notices Someone Outside and Goes to Investigate Startling the Stalker who Took Off Running into the Night.
  • The Stalker was so Startled that He/She had Left Their Camera Behind on Which were Several Pictures of Knight obviously taken without Her Knowledge.
  • Several Days After the Neighbor-Stalker Run In Knight Disappears, and During the Investigation the Detectives working the Case Received 3 Pieces of Mail.

            

  • The First Piece of Mail was a Map with a Taunting Letter:

May 1, 1997

ARMSTRONG

I cannot believe that you are unable to locate Purity Knight. Are you blind? Will I have to deliver her to your door?

In this most humble, yet most homely narrative which I am about to pen, I neither expect nor solicit belief.

PURITY KNIGHT IS ALIVE

I do not expect her condition to improve. If she dies in there it will be on your hands. Your hands–not mine.

A friend.

  • The Second was a Photo of Knight inside of some Bizarre Box, and on the Back there was a Note that Read: In the Silence of the Night How we Shiver with Affright.
  • The Last Piece of Mail was another Picture this one a Close Up of Knight still Confined in the Bizarre Box.
  • Less than a Month Later Knight’s Corpse was discovered in a Pine Grove by a Man out Walking. He was just taking a stroll and just so happened to Notice the Bizarre Box laying off the Beaten Path.
  • Corey Taylor the Lead Singer of Slipknot it was Rumored had read the Knight Case, and had used it as Inspiration for the Slipknot Song “Purity”

            

AND NOW FOR THE FIRST (aka The Little) TWIST:

  • Purity Knight is NOT a Real Person.
  • The Purity Knight Case was a Fake.
  • The Case was Posted on CrimeScene.Org which features Fictitious Cases for Law Enforcement/Government Agencies/Amateur Detectives/Private Investigators Etc.
  • Slipknot was hit with a Copy Right Infringement Lawsuit by the Creator of the Purity Knight Case, and Pulled the Song from Their then Upcoming Album. Slipknot went on to claim the Song “Purity” was in Fact inspired by Movies like The Collector and Boxing Helena. In the End Slipknot Won the Law Suit and are Now Allowed to Play Their Song “Purity” Live in Concert.

NOW WITHOUT FURTHER AWAIT THE SECOND TWIST (aka The BIG ONE)! which Stems from the Video Posted Below with the Pertainent Information Undernieth It.

  • Thirteen Years Later in 2010 the Above Video Titled RARE Purity Knight Buried Alive (Police Footage Found) was Posted to Youtube. The Video claimed to be From the Camera The Stalker Dropped when He/She Ran Away from the Neighbor, and that it had been Kept from the Public Pending Investigation.
  • Accompanying the Video was an Alleged Police Report that Reads:

In early March of 1997 Purity Knight and Her Roommate Perez were the victims of a stalking incident. A neighbor, Johnny McPhail, spotted the stalker sometime before 11:00pm in a tree in front of the apartment outside their windows. He reported seeing lights from the Tree. Mr. McPhail went out to check and then pursued the subject through the woods. The suspect was not caught. Mr. McPhail described the suspect as small build, approximately about 5″8″ in Height with a light complexion. Footprints where found at the scene when the Responding Officer Arrived. Also Recovered at the scene was a 35mm Digital Camera dropped by the Fleeing Suspect. The camera showed a number of photographs taken, and a video which will not be shown to the public, and will only be shown to the Detectives and those Directly involved in the Case. For Police Eyes Only.

NOW THIS IS WHERE SHIT GETS WEIRD

  • Though the Purity Knight Case was a Fake it NEVER Mentions or Alludes to a Video.
  • If the Creator intended the Video to be Part of the Case Why didn’t They Ever Provide a Link for it? I think it’s more than Safe to say the Creator did Not intend the Video to be a Part of the Case to Begin with.
  • During the Entire Slipknot Song LawSuit on which Cory Taylor/Slipknot Commentated Extensively on Neither EVER Mentioned or Alluded to the Video.
  • Also there in NO Mention of the Video on 99% of the Forms pertaining to the Purity Knight Case.
  • The 2010 Video and Audio far Exceeded that of a any Available Video Camera in 1997.

So Where Does This Leave Us You May be Wondering at this Point and We wouldn’t Blame You. This Leaves Us with just a Single and EXTREMELY UNNERVING THEORY which is as Follows. The Video is Indeed Real and Shows an Actual Victim is Being Buried Alive, and The Killer is using the Purity Knight Case as a Cover Up ( possibly as Unsolicited Fan Fiction) to Hide the Crime.

Thanks For Reading/Watching,

Presented By  Les Sober & FYB

Friday Horrorfest Film: THE LAST SUPPER

Welcome to Friday Horrorfest Film featuring THE LAST SUPPER the 2007 Japanese Cannibal Slasher Horror Film Written and Directed by Osamu Fukutani. The Last Supper is Based on the Work “The Shonan Flesh Eating Conspiracy” by Kei Ohishi ( a Writer Know for His Novelizations of Popular Horror Movies). Just the Mere Mention of Cannibalism would make Most of Us Feel Uneasy Due to its Disturbing and Taboo Nature. In the World of Film Cannibalism could be considered an Important Sub-Genre of the Exploitation Movie Era which was Popular in the 1970’s and 1980’s.

           

Brief Plot Summary: A Plastic Surgeon named Kato Excels at His Job hides a Dark and Deadly Secret. After Finally Succumbing to His Desire to Taste Human Flesh, Kato soon finds Himself ADDICTED TO THE TASTE OF HUMAN FLESH! Kato’s Newly Indulged Cannibalistic Tendencies lead Him to Discover Further Culinary Delights at a Seedy Underground Restaurant with some Extremely Sinister Dishes. MURDER AND MAYHEM ENSUE as the Dementedly Detestable Doctor Continues to find New and Gruesome ways to Satisfy His Abnormal Appetite.

     

The Last Supper contains a Ton of Bloodshed and Splatter Movie Gore (Including Decapitations, Face Ripping, Limb Dismemberment, Heart Ripping) and Seriously Bizarre and Chilling Highlights that include Kato talking to the SEVERED HEADS OF HIS VICTIMS while Dining on Their Flesh, a BLOOD CURDLING Wedding Finally, and a Sequence where the Underground Restaurant/Night Club has a Sickening Special on Their Menu where a Female Dancer is Decapitated with Her Body Sliced Up and Cooked. Kato is the Film’s Main Viewing Strength in the Manner He Remains Cool and Calm while Performing GRISLY AND MURDEROUS ACTS upon His Victims (and Let’s Face it Kato and the Gore are the Main Reason to Check Out The LAst Supper).

Enjoy.

We Hope You Enjoyed This Tasty Tale of a Flesh Eating Psychopath as Much as We Did.

Thanks For Watching,

Presented By  Les Sober & FYB

(Post Time 12:19am)

The Mysterious Demise of Elisa Lam

Welcome to Another Installment of STRANGE AND DISTURBING VIDEOS  Featuring The Elisa Lam Elevator Surveillance Footage. This Time around We’re Going to Do things a Little Differently by Switching Up the Format. Directly Below is the Elisa Lam Video Footage, and Below the Video are The Facts, Speculations, and Unsolved Explanations.

The Facts:

  • Elisa Lam was a 21 Year Old Canadian Tourist and Student at the University of British Columbia in Vancouver where She was Originally From.
  • Lam was Visiting California and She was Traveling Alone.
  • In Spite of Being a Lone Traveler Lam remained in Constant Contact with Her Parents calling Them Several Times a Day.
  • Lam Struggled with Bipolar Disorder and Depression.
  • Lam was taking a Several Psychiatric Drugs to Treat Her Mental Health Issues.
  • Lam had a Blog where She Openly discussed Both Her Health and Mental Health Issues.

           

  • Lam Checked into the Cecil Hotel on January 26, 2013 and was Scheduled for Check Out on January 31, 2013
  • The Cecil (Formerly Hotel Cecil and Informally as The Cecil) is a Low Budget Hotel Built in 1927.
  • The Cecil is Located in Downtown Los Angeles on the Infamous Skid Row (Skid Row is Home to Countless Homeless, Alcoholics, Drug Dealers, Pimps, Drug Addicts, Hookers, Petty Criminals, and Assorted Deviants. Think NYC’s Hell’s Kitchen before Gentrification.)
  • Notorious Serial Killer, Rapist, and Burglar Richard Ramirez (aka The Night Stalker) lived at the Cecil from 1984-1985 during Most of His Horrific Killing Spree.
  • Lesser Known Austrian Serial Killer Johann “Jack” Unterweger was also a Resident of the Cecil’s Sordid Past.
  • In the 1930’s was Home to 6 Reported Suicides. A Few Residents Ingested Poison, While Others Shot Themselves, Slit Their Own Throats, or Jumped Out Their Bedroom Windows.
  • The Cecil is also Home to a 1964 Unsolved Murder .
  • In the 1950’s-60’s The Cecil experience another Rash of Suicides so Many that the Locals Dubbed The Cecil “The Suicide”.
  • Since the Elisa Lam’s Death the Cecil Rebranded itself The Stay On Main Hotel.

     

  • Initially Lam had a Shared Two Roommates, But Her Roommates complained to the Hotel Staff of Lam’s “Odd Behavior”.
  • Lam was then moved to a Private Room for the Remainder of Her Stay.
  • Lam was Supposed to Check Out of the Cecil on January 29th, But She Never Did.
  • Lam was Last seen Alive on January 29th by a Local Bookshop Owner.
  • Lam failed to Call Her Parents and Check in Either on January 29th which was the First Time She hadn’t Her Entire Trip.
  • Lam’s PArents called the LAPD and Reported Their Daughter Missing.
  • The Police Utilizing Search Dogs along with Lam’s Parents conduct a Thorough Search of the Cecil Hotel Including the Roof.
  • Their Search Turned Up Nothing Not s Single Clue or Shred of Evidence.
  • Lam’s Parents Didn’t Voluntarily Disclose Their Daughters Mental Health History to the Police Who were Pissed About it. Obviously The Police Thought such Pertinent Information would have been More Helpful if They had been Informed from the Beginning.

           

  • Shortly after the Failed Search News of Lam’s Mysterious Disappearance Hits the Media.
  • The Police deem Lam’s Disappearance as Suspicious and May Indicate Foul Play.
  • The Police hold a Press Conference and make Lam’s Case Public on February 6th.
  • Over a Week Passes before the Police Hold a Second Press Conference on February 14th. At the Press Conference They Release a Four Minute Video of Lam caught on an Elevator Surveillance Camera. The Video Captured Lam’s Erratic and Bizarre Behavior in Her Final Moments.
  • In the Footage Lam is seen Exiting and Re-entering the Elevator, Talking and Wildly Gesturing in the Hallway Outside the Elevator, and Sometimes seeming to Play a Sinister Game of Hide and Seek.
  • It is assumed the Elevator Door was Malfunctioning which Explains Why the Doors Don’t Automatically Close thus Remaining Open for Over 4 Minutes Straight.
  • After the Release of the Video Footage the Case’s Momentum Slows Considerably to a Virtual Stop.

            

  • Eventually Guests at the Cecil start to Complain about Low Water Pressure, and that the Water was Blackish in Color with a Very Unusual Taste.
  • During the Whole Ordeal The Cecil Remained Open. They did Require All Guests to Sign a “Drink The Water at Your Own Risk”/”Can’t Sue Us Waiver
  • On February 19th a Maintenance Worker Discovered Lam’s Body Floating in one of the Cecil’s 4 Large Water Tanks.
  • Lam Body was Nude, and Her Clothes along with Personal Affects were Floating in the Tank With Her.
  • The Coroner’s Report Found No Alcohol or Illegal Drugs in Her System, and  Deemed Lam’s Death as an Accidental Drowning.

The Unanswered Questions:

  • How did Lam access the Roof of the Cecil? The Door that leads to the Roof is Securely Locked at All Times, and is Wired with an Emergency Alarm that is Triggered When the Door is Opened. No Alarm was Ever Reported.
  • The Cecil’s Water Tanks are Four Feet Wide and 8 Feet Tall, and are Elevated on a Substantial Cinder Block Base increasing Their Height.
  • There NO FIXED ACCESS to the Water Tanks such as a Ladder or Stairs so How did Lam get on Top of the Tank to Begin With?
  • The Lids to the Tanks Weight 20 Pounds a Piece so if Lam climbed into the Tank on Her own Accord How did She Close the Lid with No Internal Handle?
  • The Water Level of the Tank that Lam’s Body was Found in  was too Low to allow Her to Reach the Hatch Door once inside of the Tank (even if there was a Viable Handle)?
  • Also What about the Fact the Police had Searched the Roof with the Assistance of Official Trained Search Dogs that turned up Nothing?
  • The Autopsy Report and its Conclusions have also been Questioned.
  • The Autopsy Report Doesn’t Say what the Results of the Rape Kit and Fingernail Kit Were, or Even if They were Processed.
  • Even the Coroner’s Pathologists appeared to be Ambivalent about the Conclusion that Lam’s Death was Accidental.
  • Lam’s Tumblr Blog was Consistently Updated up to 11 Months after Her Death.
  • Lam’s Phone was Not Found either with Her Body or in Her Hotel Room; it has been Assumed to have been Stolen sometime around Her Death.
  • Weather the Continued Updates to Lam’s Tumblr Blog were Facilitated by the Theft of Her Phone, the Work of a Hacker, They’re Automatic Updates through Tumblr’s Queue (which allows Users to Automatically Publish when the User is Away), or Possibly by Lam’s Killer is Unknown.

            

The Video Footage Theories and Conspiracies:

  • In Lou of the Mind Boggling Dynamics Some Believe Lam simply Commited Suicide.
  • Some Believe it was Due to The Paranormal someway Linked to the Cecil’s Violent Past.
  • Other Believe it was the Evil Spirit of Serial Killer Richard Ramirez or Johann “Jack” Unterweger who Still Stalk the Halls of the Cecil.
  • Another School of Thought is Lam was Demonically Possessed.
  • The More Practical Minded People Speculate Lam was having a Manic Fit or a Psychotic Break.
  • In Spite of the Coroner’s Report Finding No Alcohol or Illegal Drugs in Lam’s System insist She was Under The Influence/ Intoxicated explaining Her Abnormal Behavior in the Video Footage.
  • The Main and Most Intriguing Belief being Lam was in Fact Murdered. It Would explain Why in the Footage Lam Appears to Be Hiding at Times, Acting like She’s being Followed, Pleading with Someone in the Hallway, and Overall Frantic and Panicked Behavior. This could also Explain Lam’s Continued Tumblr Updates as They are being Posted by the Killer using Lam’s Missing Phone.

           

In The End it was a Mystery Then and It’s a Mystery Today. It’s Safe to Say Whatever the Secret was Behind Lam’s Final Manic Moments She Took With Her to the Grave.

Thanks For Reading/Watching,

Presented By    Les Sober & FYB  (Posted at 1:07 am)

Scumfuck Radio (Our Favorite GG Allin Songs)

It’s No Secret that We here at FYB are GG Allin Fanatics in the Least, and Thus have Decided to Start the Scumfuck Radio (Our Favorite GG Allin Songs) Series.

The Series serves to Showcase Our Absolute Favorite Tunes from the Infamous Rock’n Roll Terrorist GG ALLIN.

Each Installment will Feature a Song (with or without a Accompanying Vide0) along with the Lyrics Transcribed Below.

           

We have Already Covered Our All Time Favorite GG Song Titled Bite It You Scum, and Now Here is Our Second All Time 2nd Favorite GG Song the Anti-Social Anthem Shoot, Knife, Strangle, Beat & Crucify off of the Album Brutality & Bloodshed For All. (The Last Every Record by GG Allin before His Untimely Death on June 28, 1993 due to a Heroin Overdose).

GG was always Controversial with His Notorious Live Shows Involving anything from GG Urinating on the Band, Rolling in Broken Glass,Starting Full Blown Riots at Concert Venues, Self Mutilation, Nudity, Fist Fights with Fans, Vandalism, Obscenity, Running from the Police, Promotors Shutting Down Shows Prematurely Due to Violence/Property Damage, Tons of Drugs, Binge Drinking, GG Knocking out His Own Teeth with the Microphone (or shoving it Up His Ass), and Most Famously GG’s Indulgence in Coprophagia/ Coprophagy (Which is the Consumption of Feces aka Actually Eating Shit). GG though wasn’t Satisfied with just Eating Shit, He took Shits on Stage and would Throw it at The Audience, Smear it on His Naked Body, and Roll in It.

           

Unfortunately By the Time GG Recorded Our Favorite GG Album Brutality & Bloodshed For All after a 3 Year Prison Stint (For Assaulting a Fan and Bating Them so Severely They spent Months in the Hospital Recovering) His Voice was Shot to Hell. Years of Drinking, Drugging, Smoking, and Psychotic Screaming finally caught up with GG, and reduced His Voice to a Gravely Growl that at Times is Incomprehensible. Thats Why We felt it was Imperative We included the Lyrics.

Enjoy.

Lyrics:

Stand Up, it’s Time to Rise

It’s Time for Revenge, Opposition must Die

Chaos, Violence, Revolution Now

We are the Real Rock’n Roll Underground

          

Shoot, Knife, Strangle, Beat and Crucify

These are the 5 Laws of the Jungle that I Live By

You Locked Me up in Prison on the Inside

Now it’s time to Shoot, Knife, Strangle Beat and Crucify

           

Shoot, Knife, Strangle, Beat and Crucify

I Believe in an Eye for an Eye

Your Rehabilitation Backfired from the Inside

Now its Time to Shoot, Knife, Strangle, Beat and Crucify

            

Stand Up, It’s Time to Rise

It’s Time for Revenge, Opposition must Die

Chaos, Violence, Revolution Now

We are the Real Rock’n Roll Underground

           

Shoot, Knife, Strangle, Beat and Crucify

I am the Guy, the One You tried so Hard to Fry

But I was Strong, You Couldn’t take My Mind

Now It’s Time to Shoot, Knife, Strangle, Beat and Crucify

           

Stand Up, It’s Time to Rise

It’s Time for Revenge, Opposition Must Die

Chaos, Violence, Revolution Now

We are the Real Rock’n Roll Underground

(Repeat 4 Times until Song Ends)

 

Thanks for Listening,

Presented By   Les Sober & FYB  

Animation Abominations: CREAM

Welcome to this Installment of Animation Abominations (aka Cartoons That Aren’t For Children) Featuring CREAM By the One and Only David Firth. For those Who do Not Know or May Not BE Aware David Firth is an English Animator, Director, Writer, Musician, Actor, Voice Actor, Video Artist, and Broadcaster of Whom We are a Big Fan of Here at FYB. Several of Firth’s works in Flash Animation, along with Multiple Music Videos and Works of Video Art, have Garnered Large Followings.

     

The Time has Come for CREAM- the Latest Product that will Fix Your Life. If Your Ugly CREAM will make You Handsome, If You had Your Leg Amputated CREAM can Grow You a New One, and MORE! This is the Story of Dr. Bellifer, a Scientific Genius, who Years of Smashing Particles Together, Reveals His revolutionary New Product with the Power to Fix all of Your and The World’s Problems. Enjoy.

Thanks for Watching,

  Presented By Les Sober

Dark Web Video: Corpus Christus (Lobotomy)

Welcome to this Installment of Dark Web Video Featuring CORPUS CHRISTUS!

First off the Name is sort of a Shock Type Tactic as it’s a Play on the Latin Corpus Christi which translates into The Body of Christ, but that’s Not All. It turns Out Corpus Christus is in Fact the Stop Motion Nightmare By the wonderfully Demented David Hatch (Who Directed, Produced, and Animated Lobotomy for Hatch Films). Corpus Christus is actually Hatch’s 2005 Video Tilted Lobotomy with the Video’s Beginning and Ending Credits Edited Out. WE thought it Only Fare to Post Both Videos as Proof so Below You will Find Corpus Christus followed by Lobotomy.

          \

Plot: A Man going through the Aging Process is Tended to By a Series of Demonically looking and Tortured Mechanical Minions throughout His Life.

Possible Themes:

  • It could be a Religious Commentary about How much Horrible Shit has been committed in the Name of God.
  • It could be a Social Commentary about Battling /Coping with One’s Inner Demons or about not letting Your age Define You or Possible its about Regret.
  • It could be about the Aging Process in that from the Moment We are Born are Bodies are Aging, and as They do They start to Wear Out, Break Down, and Fail. That and with more Recent Medical Developments People are Living Longer than Ever, but How can We Keep Our Bodies Maintained trough a Longer Existence?!

Thanks for Watching,

 Presented by Les Sober

Saying “Let Me Let You Go” Is Fucking Lame

One of My Best Friends from High School, and only one of a few People I kept in Touch Sporadically through out the Years was Bluejetski (Sad to Say Bluejetski Passed Fairly Recently). Something We had in common was We both were in Agreement People do Absurd Shit without even thinking, or at Least Thinking it Through. A Prime Example was that on of the Most Common Absurd things that People do is End Phone Conversations by Saying “Well Let Me Let You Go…..” which is Utterly Ridiculous.

If I’m the one Ending the fucking Phone Call then Why am I acting like the Person I’m talking to said They had to Go?! Also whenever Someone says “Let Me Let You Go…..” They explain what it is They have to Do Now, and that’s the Reason They’re Ending the Call. If You think about it for a Second it makes Much more Sense to say the Alternative “I Have To Go…..” since it’s Far more Accurate a Statement.

            

Luckily on of the Reasons Bluejetski and I were Friends in the First Place was We shared the same Absurdly Bizarre and Extremely Dark sense of Humor. So in this Case We decided as Far as We were Concerned We would always Opt for “I have to Go” over “Let Me Let You Go”, but that wasn’t all Not by a Long Shot. Next We Launch an Unofficially Official Who can Top Who with the Reason We had to Go. Since Blujetski’s Untimely Demise I’ve reflected on Our Unique Friendship to say the Least. Thus I decided to Type up a Mock List as an Example(s) of the Weird Shit We Said to Each other over Our 27 Year Friendship.

Here We Go: “I Have To Go…..”

  • I Just Farted Blood.
  • I shit so hard I Prolapsed My Rectum.
  • My Grandfather just Spontaneously Combusted.
  • My Cat Just Ate My Dog.
  • I got my Dick stuck in My Bong.
  • My Grandmother just Transformed into My Grandfather.
  • The Aliens are Here and want to get on with the Probing.
  • I was holding a Seance and Now all My Dead Relatives are here.
  • I just made Jam out of a Jellyfish.
  • A Bear is raping a Rabbit in My back Yard.

 

  • I accidentally Disemboweled  Myself.
  • The Acid I took just Kicked and I being chased by French Fries.
  • A Dingo Ate My Baby. (Hats off to You if You get That Reference)
  • Satan is Calling.
  • Just started a New Crack Addiction.
  • I have to Pawn My Great Grandfather’s Gold Teeth.
  • I have to call 911 I was Masturbating and the Cock Ring is Stuck.
  • I was reading a Porn Magazine and got a Paper cut on My Cock.
  • I have to put a VooDoo curse on My Neighbors thats gives them all Herpies.
  • Jesus is calling Me Home I’m running Late.

  • I have to go watch Debbie does Nova Scotia (Hats Off if You get that Reference.
  • Stepped on a Needle at the Jersey Shore and Now am Addicted to Heroin.
  • I have to Jump Up My own Butt and Die.
  • I’m having a Way to Near Near Death Experience.
  • My Pet Hamster got Aids.
  • I have to Lobotomize a Stray Cat.
  • Drive the Sheep to the Sheep Fuckers Union Meeting.
  • I’m going to a Circle Jerk Hosted by an Octopus.
  • I have to Call Cthulhu (Hots off again if You get That Reference)
  • I have to find a Hooker with Grabs because I want Seafood, but I’m Broke.

 

  • I have to Impale My Boss.
  • I just Passed Go and Didn’t Collect $200.
  • Because a Riot Doesn’t start on its own.
  • A chicken thinks My Balls are Eggs and Won’t get off My Lap.
  • Have to Eat Pork’n Beans in Hell.
  • To Prove I’m a Real Man by Wiping My Ass with Barbwire.
  • I’m gonna try jerking off with Sandpaper.
  • I didn’t look both ways before crossing the Street.
  • A Bus Full of Nuns just Exploded Outside My House.
  • Forgot to Buy Fertilizer for My Mom’s Garden so I have to go Shit in It.

            

  • Going to Populate Antartica.
  • I fucked My Girlfriends brains Out and Now I have to figure out how to put them back in.
  • I have to figure out what to do with all these Dead Ninjas.
  • I have to Wax on Wax Off.
  • Join a Boy Band and Kill Myself.
  • I have to Eat Shit.
  • I have to get My Fuck Flying because I don’t give One.
  • I was scratching My ass and Accidentally Fisted Myself.
  • Have to Gargle with Broken Glass.
  • See about Aborting My Uncle.

           

  • I just went completely Deaf.
  • I give a Shit, But I don’t give a fuck.
  • Chuck Norris is here and wants to throw down.
  • Need to hold onto a blade of Grass to keep from falling off the Planet.
  • I have to go throw Airplane Liquor Bottles at My Alcoholic Aunt.
  • Have to get going on a Old Fashioned Bender.
  • I just turned inside Out.
  • ME, Myself, and I are in a Fight.
  • Swallow a Sword and shit a Dagger.
  • My head wasn’t fastened On so I Lost it.

  • My Brain fell out of My Ear and Rolled under the Refrigerator.
  • I have to train My Flea Circus because We’re going on a Tour.
  • Breed My Captive Platypuses.
  • I bought Guam so I have to Fill out a shit ton of Paperwork.
  • My Tapeworm is Hungry.
  • I got so High (aka Stoned) I can see My House from Here.
  • My brother is on PCP in the Backyard Kicking the shit out of a Squirrel.
  • I have to Try Bud Dry. (Hots off if You get that Reference)
  • Get in a Shouting Match with a Mute.
  • There Nazis on the Moon and Someone has to Stop them.

  • Moving to Chernobyl to see if I gain any Super Powers.
  • I have an Appointment to Pierce and Tattoo My Taint.
  • My 4th Cousin Removed needs an Exorcism.
  • I ate Shit and will Now Die.
  • Hack My Robots Brain to see what it’s Thinking.
  • Spear Fish in the Pond at the Local Golf Course.
  • Go to the Community Pool and Throw Rocks at People.
  • About to get into a Knife Fight with a Homicidal Hobo.
  • I’m converting to Cannibalism and a Tasty looking Jogger just went by.
  • I have to Just Say No. (Yup Hats Off if  You got that Reference)

           

  • I have to go fuck Myself.
  • I got to start cooking a Rack of Spam.
  • I’ve gone Temporarily Insane, But I’ll Be Ok by Monday.
  • I got High on My own Supply.
  • I’m going to Start Some Anarchy in the UK (Hots off Reference)
  • Because I have something I need to do The Day After Yesterday.
  • I lost My fucking Marbles so I replaced them with Tiddly Winks and its not working out well.
  • I Assumed and made an Ass out of You and Me.
  • Disgraced My Family and am going to Commit Ritual Suicide as Penance.
  • I have to go See a Man about a Widget.

           

  • I just got Confirmation I’m going to be on Jerry Springer.
  • My Trailer Park is on Fire.
  • I’m upgrading from Double to Triple Wide.
  • My Government Cheese Just Arrived.
  • I’m throwing a Red Roof Party.
  • I just went on the Deep Web and Drowned.
  • I have to Pick My Teeth with a Razor Blade.
  • I’m not going Grave Robbing I’m Grave Spelunking.
  • Death comes to those who Wait and I’ve been on Hold Forever.
  • I just Projectile Vomited so I need to make sure I’m not Possessed.

Thanks for Reading,

  By Les Sober  

FYB’s Salute To Eccentrics: Korney Creates a HOMUNCULUS

We came across a Enthusiastic Russian Man Who was Posting a Series of Home Videos of Him Attempting to Create a Actual Homunculus. Though He never produced the Definition of a Homunculus what He managed to Create is Something Straight out of Science fucking Fiction.

Definition of a Homunculus:

Is a Representation of a Miniature Fully Formed Human Being (Example Tom Thumb). Popularized in 16th Century Alchemy. Alchemy is an Ancient Branch of Natural Philosophy. Most People are Familiar with Alchemists as The Lunatics from History that tried to Purify, Mature, and Perfect Materials (example Transforming “Base Metals such as Lead into “Noble Metals” most Notably Gold. Alchemists also attempted to Create an Elixir of Immortality, the creation of Panaceas able to Cure Disease, the Development of Alkahest a Universal Solvent, and the Creation of Homunculi to Name a Few. The Homunculus Concept has Roots in Performationism (a Formerly Popular Theory that Organisms Develop from Miniature Versions of Themselves).

           

The Homunculus first Appeared by Name in the Alchemical writings Attributed to Paracelsus (1493-1542) In De Natura Rerum (1537) Paracelsus Outlines His Method for Creating Homunculi:

That the Sperm of a Man be Putrified bu Itself in a Sealed cucurbit for 40 Days with the Highest Degree of Putrefaction in a Horse’s Womb, or at least so Long that it comes to life and moves Itself, and Stirs, which is Easily Observed. After this Time it will look Somewhat like a Man, but Transparent, without a Body. If, after this, it be Fed Wisely with the Arcanum of Human Blood, and be Nourished for up to 40 Weeks, and be kept in the even Heat of a Horse’s Womb, a Living Human Child Grows therefrom, with all its Members like another Child, which is Born of a Woman, But Much Smaller.

In 1775, Count Johann Ferdinand von Kufstein working together with Abbe Geloni, an Italian Cleric, is Reputed to have Created 10 Homunculi with the Ability to Foresee the Future, which von Kufstein kept in a Glass Containers at His Masonic Lodge in Vienna. Dr. Emil Besetzny’s Masonic Handbook Die Sphinx, Devoted an Entire Chapter to the wahrsagenden Geisterm(Crying Ghosts). These Homunculi are Reputed to have been seen by Several People, Including some Local Dignitaries.

            

With That Said Now Back to The Russian and His Homunculus Experiments…..

The Man’s goes by the Name Korney (the R is Silent), and Unfortunately there isn’t a whole hell of a lot about Him online Outside of His Passionate Homunculi Experiments. Here is what We have Uncovered Thus Far:

  • Korney went Silent for 6 moths without Posting.
  • After 6 Months Rumors started that Korney had if fact Died of a Heart Attack.
  • Once the Rumor of Korney’s apparent Demise Conspiracy Theories Erupted like an On Line Volcano.
  • One Rumor was the KGB or Russian Government Assassinated Karney due to His Experimentation and “Knowing Too Much”. The only Problem with this Theory is Why the hell would the Russian Government/KGB wait for Years (and countless Video Posts) before Intervening?!
  • Then There’s The Frankenstein Theory to consider. The Frankenstein Theory is Based on Korney’s Videos where in one Episode in the Series HE announces One of His Two Current Homunculi in Fact Emits Electricity. Karney Demonstrates this in the Video using an Electrical Detection Device of some Kind. So the Theory is The Homunculus (Named Pikachu after its Electric Emitting Capabilities) may have Accidentally or perhaps Intentionally as a Defense Mechanism Electrocuted Korney causing said Heart Attack . Now to Believe this Theory One must believe that Korney’s Video’s are Real and Not Faked in Any Way.

           

  • The 3rd Major Theory is the Videos were Elaborately Staged using Expert Camera Work and Possibly a bit of CGI thrown in.
  • If The Videos are indeed Fake it Doesn’t Diminish the Excited Enthusiasm for this Korney exhibits for Experimentation Project then Faking His Own Death wouldn’t be Out of the Question. It be the Perfect End Game Move as it would leave all the Questions about His Videos Unanswered Permanently. If He Faked His own Death or Not there will always remain what They Call in the Legal Realm Reasonable Doubt. No One will be able to Definitively say it Was or Wasn’t Real.
  • So if Korney was planning to Fake His Own Death to End the Series as a Real or Fake Mystery He needed a Set Up for the Ending. The Electricity the Homunculus exhibited in His Video then would provide a Perfect Set up for the Heart Attack Scenario. The Principle would have been Simplicity personified as The Homunculi apparently Live in Water and Allegedly Emit an Electricity in some Capacity. This Provides the Set Up for a Possible Electrical Shock, and Electrocution can Cause Heart Attacks or Stop The Human Heart. And since No One Knows if the Videos are Real or Not Who’s to say a Homunculus Couldn’t emit an Electrical Shock great enough to Kill a Full Grown Man?!
  • There was also Official News/Media coverage of Korney’s Passing, and of Course some People believe it was a Fake News Cast also Created by Korney to Help convince People He was indeed Dead. Others believed One of the Reporters in the News Report was in fact Korney proving that He faked His own Death. Some People believe the News Story is actually the Cover Story for the Possible and Alleged Assassination by the KGB/Russian Government.

Enjoy.

Thanks For Watching,

  Presented By Les Sober

Tidbits For Shits and Giggles: Henry Eats

Have You ever found something Wildly Entertaining without Actually being about to Explain Why? For Example I have Mentioned one of My Favorite “Jokes” as it were is as Follows:

Why Do Ducks Have Webbed Feet? To Put Out Forrest Fires.

Why Do Elephants have Flat Feet? For Stomping Out Flaming Ducks.

Granted this isn’t what one would refer to as a Joke by Traditional Standards as its Completely Absurd, Makes Absolutely No Logical Sense, and is Completely Void of Any and All Context. Whoever is Responsible for this Joke had a Very Eccentric Sense of Humor, Was Mentally Unwell, or Was Quite Intoxicated at the Time (Our Money is On Intoxicated be it Insanely Drunk, Higher Than Fuck, or Tripping Balls). No Matter the Reason the  Joke always makes Me Smile without Fail.

Henry Eats by Ben Wheele has some Similar Features as it Lacks any kind of Context, is rather Absurd, Kind of Oddly Creepy, and God Only Knows what the Point is or Even if there is One to Begin with. It’s Simply a Quirky Little Piece of Animation that’s Best to be Taken at Face Value. Enjoy.

Thanks for Watching,

  Brought to You By Les Sober