“Alright Lester told Me He’d text Me the exact specifics, but He wants us to Buy the Best medium range Dildo for now. Then on Our way back Lester wants Us to stop off at a Hardware Store and pick up some sort of Weather Proofing Spray. You know the kind Business Types use to Water Proof Their expensive Italian Leather Shoes and Shit.” reported Shane very matter of factly.
“Furthermore Lester said as for post Severing Scene Lester’s going to use a small Metal Bar to reconnect the 2 broken pieces. Next He’ll Super Glue the Broken pieces back together around the interior Metal Bar Support The all thats left is to Slap a Cock Ring over the repair, and then will be reusable in Lester’s next Outlandish Film.” Shane continued as Glen stared at Him Blank Faced and Motionless. Once Shane was finished relaying Lester’s instructions turned and walked out without saying another word.
Shane stood looking reminiscent of a Meerkat searching the Grass Lands for possible Predators as He watched in dismay as a Frustrated and Furious Glen marched to the Door, and threw it Open forcefully just in case Someone wasn’t aware that He was being an Angry Asshole. Shane then leaned over and grabbed one of the Dildos off the Rack, Glanced at it, and then Shrugged to Himself.
Lee’s observations so far were Shane was Voice of Reason or The Sensible Ying to Glen’s Emotionally Driven Combative Yang. It was Shane’s unofficial job to stay Grounded and Rational when Glen flew off the hook in a Wild Whirlwind of Extreme Emotions. This dynamic Lee found was more than common amongst the Members of Society.
Lee had decided that Opposites Do AND More Over MUST attract. One Person is The Calm to the significant Other’s Chaos which works as They 2 Personality Types nullify one another. When You put 2 identical Personalities together in one relationship it NEVER works, and is usually just one long clusterfuck from Beginning to End. People are just like fucking Magnets in Opposite Poles Connect to one another while if You try to connect 2 Magnets using Their SAME Poles They repell each other (The desired Connection is for all intensive purposes is Impossible.)
Shane approached the Check Out counter still trying to figure out if the particulate Dildo He was about to purchase for His Boss to use as in the (Castration & Masturbation with a Cheese Grater None The Less) Scenes His Gory Splatter Movie was indeed the “Right” One for the Job.
Stay Tuned Kiddies for Tomorrow’s Installment of Lee Jonitis: Professional People Watcher (8/365)
Thanks for Reading,
By Les Sober