After an intense Moment of Eye Contact the Officer turned on His heel and headed back to His Patrol Car Leaving Lee and Dizzy standing in the Street like a bunch of assholes.
“FUCK THE POLICE!” yelled Dizzy Defiantly at the Police Officer Back still steaming about the Whole Situation.
“Fuck You Too.” answered the Police Officer over His shoulder not breaking stride before getting in His Patrol Car, and Speed Off Annoyed that He had to deal with Two Drunken Idiots when there was Real Crime out there He could have been Fighting.
“So now what the fuck are We gonna do?!” asked Lee bewildered by what had just happened and still quite Drunk. Lee started to riffle through His pockets searching for spare change for the Bus. There was absolutely No Way in Hell He was ever setting a single fucking foot in Dizzy’s Apartment ever again. Lee looked up briefly to see what the fuck Dizzy was doing since He had momentarily forgotten about Him. Dizzy was standing with a dumbfounded expression plastered across his face like a Drunken Mental Patient swaying ever so slightly as He Peered off blankly into the Distance.
“You got any Change for the Bus?” Lee wondered aloud as He continued to Pilfer His Pockets for literally all they were worth.
“Are You talking t Yourself or Me?!” Dizzy inquired as He slowly transitioned from wherever the fuck He was at in His Head back to Reality, and thought standing in the Street made Him look like some sort of an asshole.
“You I’m obviously talking to You I mean I know what the fuck I’m doing! I’m checking to see if I have change. So It’s You I’m wondering about.” quipped Lee snidely as He was less than Happy at How things had Turned Out.
“It’s not so fucking Obvious though is It really I had Not a fucking Clue who You were addressing, and that’s why I had to fucking ask.” replied Dizzy in an equally snarky tone as He too was Thrilled about Recent Events either.
“I don’t have any change But I found a couple of Dollar Bills and We can get Change from the Corner Deli on the Way to the Bus Stop so that’ll work, Talk about convenient right?” said Lee in a more Up Beat Tone as He realized there was No Point in Wasting the Rest of the Day over some Stupid shit.
Lee started off toward the Corner Deli down the Block with Dizzy following in Tow. As They walked Lee was Mentally going over a Fictional Best Guess Copy of the Crystal Diner’s possible Menu because He was He felt on the Brink of Starvation His Hunger Fueled by His Alcohol Intake. Dizzy on the Other hand Decided this was an opportune time to Voice His rather Dismal Opinion of Public Transportation mainly Buses.
“Do You have any Idea how fucking much the Bus Sucks because if You’ve never been on a goddamn Bus before it’s a Big Old Bitch I’ll tell You That right Here Right Now,” griped Dizzy as He began to rev up into His Next Opinion Laden Rant, “First off Buses are Big Mobile Petrie Dish of Every fucking Bacteria, Virus, Internal Parasite, and Illness or Disease under the fucking Sun. You ever have Giardia because You will You ride the fucking Bus. One 10 minute run down the Road and that Evening You’ll be Shitting Your fucking Brains Out Literally. You will actually shit out Your Brain, and Once Your Mind exits Your Body Via Your asshole there’s No Turning Back Your Proper Fucked plain and simple My Friend.”
“I think Your being really fucking Overdramatic it’s like Your the fucking Mass Transit Drama Queen for crying Out Loud. Could You be any More Over the Top fucking Seriously.” complained Lee as The Two neared the Deli.
“Well the fucking Sickness is only the TIP of the fucking Iceberg of Shit that is The Bus, and I’ve only begun to Speak My Mind Motherfucker so Deal with That.” announced Dizzy with a great deal of Gusto.
Stay Tuned for the Next Bowel Clenching Installment of………
LEE JONITIS: PROFESSIONAL PEOPLE WATCHER (54/365)
Thanks for Reading,
By Les Sober