The Deviant Detective #6: Dark Web Desire

Revenge was a Concept that Rock was more than Familiar with as Rock had sought Plenty of Revenge in His Life thats for sure. Thats How Rock got into the Detective Game to begin with in Fact. Rock had always had a Special Affinity for UnderDogs of all Kinds His entire Life starting with Defending Fellow Classmates from Bullies when He was growing Up. In Adulthood Rock had felt the need to Protect People from the Bullies that had grown up to The Predators Preying on Innocent Civilians. People fucking over Other People Never sat right with Rock.  Rock also harbored an Intense Hatred for all the Things He perceived to be Unjust in the World, and had No Problem resorting to Violence to Achieve His Goal No Matter What.

Rock also possessed a Volatile mix of Impulse Control and Anger Management Issues had made Rock’s Employment Record was Sporadic as Rock jumped from Job to Job. Rock would get a Job until He was either Fired for Acting Out in some Fashion, or He got board and Simple Up and Quit. Thus Rock’s inability to Hold Down a Job along with prolonged periods of Time between said Jobs made Him a less than desirable Job Applicant. The Time in-between were a Pause in what Rock considered long and extensive succession of shitty Jobs He had the displeasure of Doing just to Pay the Bills.

Rock had Never seen the Point in having a Job if You weren’t Your own Boss since Bosses tended to be Domineering Dicks or Greedy Ego Driven Assholes. The sum total of these Personal Components that Made Up Rock’s Personality had virtually Drawn Him to Detective work. He got to be His Own Boss so No Cowing Down to a Douchbag Office Dictator, He wasn’t physically constrained by being Trapped in a Mundane Office Building Manning one of Hundreds of Crappy Cubicles. With Detective Work Rock also could Champion Underdogs, Persecute Predators, Beat Bad Guys Bloody, and Pretty much Behave as He saw Fit. Rock wanted to remain Free from the Shackles of Corporate Life serving the God’s of Capitalism making Them obscenely Wealthy while the Works Struggled to make Ends Meat.

           

“I understand Revenge is a wonderful Motivator there is truly Nothing like It,” replied Rock Dryly as He was only mildly interested in what Otto was Talking about, “The Problem is the more Money someone Steals the Harder it is to Find them. More Money equates to More Options since You can Buy Anything as Long as You have the Financial Backing to Pay the Bill.”

“Well then it’s Lucky I know where My Nefarious Business Partner is currently Operating His Shady Business Dealings from,” said Otto in a slow and steady tone,”That Alone is a rather Large Lead as it will make Tracking His Movements, Location, Business Dealings, and Known Associates that much Easier. If Knowledge is Power then Technology Provides the Tools to Obtain such Power.”

“Alright Buddy Time is Money and My Patience is Short so You can stop talking like some fucking James Bond Character,” sighed Rock growing exasperated by the Ordeal,”Get to the Goddamn Point if You Please.”

“Alright as You wish I have No issue with being Direct,” answered Otto politely, “My Unscrupulous Business Partner has set Up Shop on the Dark Web Running a Red Room called “Do Unto Others” which is gaining Popularity among the Users of the Dark Web.”

           

“I know the Basics,” said Rock who’s interest was beginning to perk up at this point, “You need the Thor also know as The Onion Software to Access the Dark Web. That and You need to protect Yourself if You venture onto the Dark Web since there Undesirables of all Kinds so You need to Hide Your IP Address and VPN. From there You can access Hidden Wiki to see what sites are out there Lurking in the Abyss of the Dark Web.”

“Not to Shabby but You’ll need someone with Far better Technical skills but I’m more than confident You can Locate such a Person considering Your Line of work You must Cross Paths with Dubious Characters of all Kinds.” said Otto being as Frank as Possible.

“If and I do mean if I take the Job it won’t be a Hunt it will be a Fishing Expedition,” Rock said matter of factly, “I don’t have the Time, Energy, Manpower, or Resources to Scour the Entirety of the Dark Web and it’s insanely easy to Hide in the Shadows. I’ll need to Set some Bait and Lure The Target out of whatever cyber hole He is Hiding and lead Him directly to Me. How the fuck did You even find Out Your ex-business partner was on the Dark Web to begin with I mean that in itself is rather Impressive since anonymity is the Key element because for the Users of the Dark Web Privacy is Number One Principle.”

           

“Thats an Excellent Question indeed,” the Otto said in a Complimentary tone, “It made the Most Sense since My Partner didn’t have the Foresight to Keep His devious Plans a Secret. What I mean by that is He frequently would talk about the Dark Web which I believed to be a Sinister Obsession with Him. He was particularly fond of discussing how if He in fact committed a Major Financial Crime how He would Utilize the Dark Web to Help Him get away consequence Free.”

“Well it makes sense now that You mention it. He could instantly Hide the Money by converting it into the Crypto Currency Bitcoin thus erasing any way of Tracking the Cash through the Banking System, He wouldn’t have to pay the fee to Launder it, Theres No Way to track the Bills through Their Serial Numbers, and there No Banks to worry about poking around in Your Business.” commented Rock having become very Intrigued by this Possible up coming Case, “No to mention the Dark Web is ground goddamn Zero for Buying Fake Passports, ID Cards, Birth Certificates, and Driver’s Licenses basically if You can Counterfeit it You can Buy it on the Dark Web. One stop shopping for The Criminal Element. Also Operating on the Dark Web means all You need is a Computer and Your good to go it allows You to Stay hidden in a chosen Location without having to Risk the Exposure of Traveling in the Real World. Lastly like I said Anonymity on the Dark Web is the Most Important thing to It’s Users so No One will come nosing around asking questions or anything like that.”

           

“So there is No reason for Me to Explain as Your intelligent Man and have figured it out for Yourself which is one of the Reasons I wanted to Hire You in particular was for Your Deductive Reasoning.” stated Otto with an air of Satisfaction.

“The Only question I have left is How did You find out about Your Ex Partner had set up a Red Room,” asked Rock with Genuine Curiosity, “I’m additionally curious since I was under the impression that Red Rooms were just an Internet Urban Legend just another helping of Creepy Pasta and all that foolish shit.”

“I assure You Detective Red Rooms are Very Real,” answered Otto Ominously, “Very Real Indeed.”

STAY TUNED for the Next Installment of………

THE DEVIANT DETECTIVE #7 COMING SOON!

Thanks for Reading,

  By Les Sober

Lee Jonitis: Professional People Watcher (35/365)

“So what’s the Deal with The Name and the Whole Bitcoin Bullshit about?!” asked Lee inquisitively.

“Well They picked the Name Ride because it Stays off People’s Radar. No One asks Questions. It’s the Hiding in Plain Sight Strategy. You see Everyone  is more than Familiar with the concept of “A Ride” You Know?” answered Dizzy as He Riffled through His numerous Pockets to scrounge up the $4.37 for the 40s.

“Yeah I get it now. No One blinks when You say shit like “Thats My Ride” or “I got to call My Ride” because Ride is so utterly Generic No One Notices being Virtually Oblivious.” said Lee in a Slow Tone of Realization.

       

“So that’s explains the Name for You so what’s the Bitcoin Tie In about? Setting Up Ride so even in some INSANELY RARE OCCURRENCE an Asshole figures Out the Ride Name the Bitcoin is there as Back Up.” explained Dizzy plainly as He took several Prolonged Sips of His 40.

“What the fuck does that Mean? Back Up?! What kind of Back Up are You talking about specifically?!” said Lee in a Condescendingly Irritated Tone as He grew irritated by the Whole dragging out of the Conversation, and wished Dizzy would get to the fucking Point already.

“Alright fucking Relax You ass I’ll explain.,” said Dizzy with a rather Authoritative Tone, “It’s really quite Obvious Regular People Don’t deal in Bitcoin or Don’t know jack diddly shit about Bitcoin period or They deem Bitcoin Shady because of it’s Dark Web Association. So without Bitcoin You can’t use Ride.”

   

“Ok thats a Pretty fucking Smart Idea They came up with.” Said Lee with slight Admiration, “How fucking far is it until We get to Your Place it feels like We’ve been walking for fucking Ever and a Day.”

“Don’t be such a Drama Queen We’ll get there Soon Enough I assure You,” replied Dizzy nonchalantly.

The two continued Their on for a while in Silence as They made quick Work of Their 40s. Then all of Suddenly Dizzy  grabbing Lee’s arm to get His Attention.

“Oh shit Look it’s fucking Dancing Dave!!” Dizzy blurted out in Drunken Excitement.

       

Lee Stopped and looked Diagonally across the Intersection at the Far Corner where Dizzy was Pointing Wildly. There on the Corner stood a Man dressed in a Navy Uniform, but not only that He also was wearing a Stereotypical Kitchen Apron along with a Old School Circa 1920’s-1930’s White Navy Cap. The Man appeared to be in His late 50’s to perhaps Early 60’s and was so Thin he looked a rather Sickly as He could weigh more than 90 pounds Soaking Wet. His skin was badly Weathered, and His Shoulders Hunched as He stood Slouching on the Corner as Still as a fucking Statue.

Dizzy again routed through His pockets until He located a handful of Spare Change which He searched through intently until He found a Couple of Quarters. Dizzy handed one of the Quarters to Lee without saying Why before He took His Quarter and lobbed it across the Intersection at Dancing Dave. The Quarter landed Unceremoniously at Dancing Dave’s Feet bouncing a couple of Times before finally coming to Rest.

       

Tune in for Next Weeks Enlightening Installment of………

LEE JONITIS: PROFESSIONAL PEOPLE WATCHER (36/365)

Thanks for Reading,

 By Les Sober

Lee Jonitis: Professional People Watcher (34/365)

“So Ride is Modeled exactly like fucking Uber or Lift, BUT it was Designed, Set Up, Run By, and is Specifically for Tech Guys, You know the So Called Nerds. The one thing Everyone knows about Nerds is that They are Painfully Socially Awkward and shit like that. They exited Their World to Walk in Ours and They fall Prey to the Alpha Mentality. The “Alpha Male” Theory was based on David Mech’s Research into the Social Structure of Wolf Packs.” Dizzy said as the Slowly Meandered down the Street.

“I’ve head of that,” replied Lee pleasantly surprised by the Conversational Topic, “That’s the Theory that the “Alpha Male” Wolf asters Himself over the Pack through Aggression, but Year Later it was Proved Mech’s Research was proved to be a Debunked Model of Lupine Social Groups.”

        

“Exactly My Friend Exactly. It turned out that with Further Study it turned out Wolves don’t really have Alpha Males or Alpha Females for that Matter. The Truth is it’s ONLY  when Combined Different Wolves from Different Families (like in a Zoo for Example)  will Fight Over Rank, and even then shit Calms Down once a New Family Structure is Established.” remarked Dizzy, ”  My Point being Nerds being Socially awkward is the ENTIRE PREMISS for the fucking Big Bang TV Show, its become an ACCEPTED Sect of Society. I mean even the fucking Fashion World the Ones Who especially attacked Nerds over Their Fashion Choices has done a fucking 180, and is Now Embracing Nerds with that Nerd Chic Happy Horseshit.”

“Well some Cliches are Cliches because They’re Real, and this is a Perfect Example of That. The Cliche that applies to this Situation is If The System Fails You Then You Make Your OWN System I suppose.” Lee said earnestly as the Two of Them stopped Briefly to Buy a Couple of Hot-dogs and Beers from a Hot Dog Cart that was in Route.

       

“True so since Nerds truly Only feel Comfortable and at Ease around or with Other Nerds This Collective of Tech Nerds created a System that suited Them Perfectly. Uber started the the Public Taxi Trend if You will, but then it was Reported Uber shits on Their Drivers Like Pigeons on a Freshly Washed Car. Then Lift showed up and Stole Uber’s Business Model, and Got Known for being Very Cool to THEIR Drivers. Same Shit Different fucking Day.” Dizzy snarled through Bites of Hotdog and Sips of Beer.

“I hear You. I had some Asshole ask Me in all fucking earnest What the hell a My Space Page fucking was. I told the Fuck it was the Original Social Media Platform that FaceBook Stole for Theirs. Now FaceBook is Corrupt as Shit, Greedy as Hell, User Exploiting, Lying, Scheming, Billion Dollars Business, BUT it’s ass Addictive as Pain Killers. Fucking Facebook is the New Opium of the Masses They Know its fucked up as all get out, yet They can’t Stop Using It to save Their fucking Life.” responded Lee with the Greatest Disgust as Lee Personally Hated the Fuck outta FaceBook.

       

That’s All For Now, and Be Sure To Check Out Next Week’s Awe Inspiring Installment of………

LEE JONITIS: PROFESSIONAL PEOPLE WATCHER (35/365)

Thanks for Reading,

  By Les Sober (12:02 am)

Lee Jonitis: Professional People Watcher (33/365)

Suddenly Dizzy turned to Lee, and surprised the hell out of Him which was Rare as Lee wasn’t easily Surprised.

“You ever Notice how a lot of times Someone You know Dislikes or even Hates Some other Person until that Person Dies, and as soon as the Person is Dead They aren’t assholes anymore? It’s as if by Dying the Person in Question is immediately absolved of all Wrong Doings during Their Life, and the People who Previously Bitched, and Talked Shit about Them Now have Nothing but Respect and Reverence for the Deceased Who when Alive was the very Person They swore was the Bane of Their Existence.” said Dizzy matter of factly as He finished Beer Number 4, and Ordering Beer Number 5.

       

Dizzy waited for the Bartender to return with His Fresh Beer before inquiring “Hey You got shit to do Today or are You free to fuck around Town , and get into some type of Trouble?!”

Lee thought to Himself and realized that He didn’t have a damn thing to do so why not see where the Afternoon would take Him.

“I got some time to Hang Out’n see Whats What.” answered Lee earnestly as He shifted uneasily in His Seat. Watching People was Lee’s Forte, and Interacting with Them Tended to put Him on Edge at First due to His Serious Trust Issues.

       

“Alright Dope. I’ll call My Buddy over at the Shitty Theater and tell Him We’re leaving are Cars, and He’ll keep an Eye on Them so They don’t get Towed or Fucked With.” announced Dizzy quite Energetically before requesting to use the Bar’s Phone.

This struck Lee as very Peculiar since People Now a Days all Live in Constant Contact with the Aide of the ever Prevalent Smart Phones so using a Business’s Landline struck Lee as Note Worthy. While Lee pondered this newly discovered Oddity Dizzy was engaged in an Increasingly Loud and Aggressive Conversation with His Buddy at the Theater over the Car situation ending with Dizzy slamming down the Phone Receiver violently several times for emphasis.

“Fuck I can’t believe there are People Born who will never know the succinct Satisfaction of Hanging the fuck Up on Some Douche by Slamming Down the Phone Receiver. Anyway He said He’d watch the Cars, He was just being a real dick about it is all. He’s a Moody little Motherfucker. Goddamn Temperamental Artist Asshole.” snarled Dizzy Seething with Frustration and Simmering in Contempt.

       

“Alright,” Dizzy continued having gathered His composure from His perviously infuriating Phone call, “Do You have any Bitcoin? Unusual Question, but Ride only Takes Bitcoin that’s the only reason I’m asking.”

“No I don’t own any Crypo Currency because I really don’t see the Point. What I mean is I know what Bitcoin is right, and I know how You can buy It. Then it starts to get Shady because for one where the fuck can You spend it outside of The Dark Web? I can’t buy fucking food with it or Pay My fucking Bills with it so what the fuck is it good for exactly?! ALSO the one question NO ONE has been able to Answer is HOW THE HELL DO I CASH OUT?! Where and How can I convert My Bitcoin into Actual Physical Cash?!” responded Lee now finding Him to be the one getting all Amped.

        

TUNE IN NEXT WEEK for the Next Breath Taking Installment of………

LEE JONITIS: PROFESSIONAL PEOPLE WATCHER (34/365)

Thanks for Reading,

  By Les Sober (Posted at 12:31am Sunday)