Tag: dark web

The F List Spirals Out Of Control Rapidly, Creator Feels Like Dr. Frankenstein

Even I can’t believe this shit is still going. It really did take on a Life of its fucking Own thats for sure.

For Those Brave Enough To ENDURE reading the ENTIRE LIST, Well Thats far beyond impressive. Give yourself a Cigar.

And Now Ladies&Gentlemen Here For Your Entertainment (and Possible Demise) THE FUCK LIST PART FUCKING FOUR.

!Warning: Prolonged Exposure to this Post can Cause Your Eyes To Bleed!

Fuck Fiber Glass. Fuck Dyson Vacuums. Fuck Dust Busters. Fuck Sams Club.

Fuck Early Mornings. Fuck Dude Ranches. Fuck Jackson Hole. Fuck Whip Its.

Fuck Fly Paper. Fuck Chili’s Baby Back Ribs. Fuck Laser Tag. Fuck OSI.

Fuck Flu Shots. Fuck Local Government. Fuck Bake Sales. Fuck Tube Tops.

FuckGarage Sale Early Birds. Fuck Storage Wars. Fuck Duck Dynasty.

Fuck The Lawrence Welk Show. Fuck Gift Shops. Fuck Imitators.

Fuck Couples That Sit On The Same Side Of The Table. Fuck Diamonds.

Fuck Wedding Registries. Fuck Honeymoons. Fuck No Paternal Leave.

Fuck Heavy Flow Days. Fuck Costume Jewelry. Fuck Monopolies.

Fuck Extradition Laws. Fuck Strep Throat. Fuck Tonsils. Fuck Mono.

Fuck Crotch Rot. Fuck Sweaty Balls. Fuck Heat Rash. Fuck Heat Stroke.

Fuck Pork Rinds. Fuck Jay Leno. Fuck Dr. Phil. Fuck Opera. Fuck Sea Lice.

Fuck Boy Bands. Fuck The Jonas Brothers. Fuck Jehovah Witnesses.

Fuck Clocking 60 New Artists Every Time I Listen To Spotify for 3 Hours.

The TV Show Jack Ass. Fuck Jim Verde, Fuck Office Art. Fuck Watercolor.

Fuck Waiting Room Art. Fuck Box Jellyfish. Fuck Station Wagons.

Fuck Crowds. Fuck Lines. Fuck The Band Sugar Ray. Fuck Mark McGrath.

Fuck Methadone Clinics. Fuck Chore Boy. Fuck Shitting In The Woods.

Fuck Zip Ties. Fuck Garbage Ties. Fuck Irritable Bowel Syndrome.

Fuck Bewilderment. Fuck Confusion. Fuck Do Dates. Fuck To Do Lists.

Fuck Team Building Exercises. Fuck Office Birthday Parties. Fuck IBM.

Fuck ADD. Fuck ADHD. Fuck Adult ADD. Fuck Restless Leg Syndrome.

Fuck The Price For Dentures. Fuck Fractions. Fuck Smoker’s Cough.

Fuck Mass Appeal. Fuck The General Public. Fuck Flat Beer. Fuck Luck.

Fuck Vermouth. Fuck Prim & Propper. Fuck Homecoming. Fuck Chick Peas.

Fuck Planking. Fuck Internet Challenges. Fuck Grilling Vegetables.

Fuck Stinky Cheeses. Fuck Closing The Carnegie Deli. Fuck Power Rangers.

Fuck The Jurassic Park Film Franchise. Fuck Agism. Fuck Gary Busey.

Fuck Parsly. Fuck The Today Show. Fuck Erotic Asphyxiation.

Fuck Voyers. Fuck Spies. Fuck Tear Gas. Fuck Jude Judy.

Fuck Souvenir Shot Glasses. Fuck Wearing A Band T-shirt To Their Concert.

Fuck The Drake Passage. Fuck Jimmy Fallon. Fuck Maggots. Fuck Blisters.

Fuck The TV Show Cheaters. Fuck Mosquito Bites. Fuck Hummer Limos.

Fuck Party Buses. Fuck Gift Baskets. Fuck Edible Arrangements. Fuck Frack.

Fuck Being Under Appreciated. Fuck Carpet. Fuck Pink Eye. Fuck Tumors.

Fuck Brain Surgery. Fuck Neurological Disorders. Fuck Boss Hog.

Fuck More. Fuck Less. Fuck Stubbing Your Toe. Fuck Paper Cuts. Fuck Veal.

Fuck Lift. Fuck Ocular Degeneration. Fuck Degeneration X. Fuck InfoWars.

Fuck Dorian Fruit. Fuck GM. Fuck Shitty Weed. Fuck Man Caves.

Fuck Hot Yoga. Fuck Car Shows. Fuck Treachery. Fuck Broken Ribs.

Fuck Back Problems. Fuck Electric Chainsaws. Fuck Electric Lawn Mowers.

Fuck Police Response Times. Fuck Restraining Orders. Fuck Hiccups.

Fuck Inflation. Fuck Exchange Rates. Fuck Currency. Fuck Auto Pay.

Fuck The Gold Standard. Fuck Mixed Nuts. Fuck Internet Cat Fishing.

Fuck SO You Think You Can Dance. Fuck America”s Got Talent.

Fuck The x Factor. Fuck The Voice. Fuck Not Getting a Promotion.

Fuck MV2. Fuck FXX Streaming. Fuck A Dead Tooth. Fuck Dogma.

Fuck Anything Repetitive. Fuck Commercials. Fuck The Penny Saver.

Fuck Pizza Bagels. Fuck Natural Peanut Butter. Fuck Miley Cyrus.

Fuck Rhetoric. Fuck Global Warming Dismissal. Fuck Indoctrination.

Fuck Influence. Fuck Peer Pressure. Fuck Cult Mentality. Fuck BRAVO.

Fuck Exclusion. Fuck Stylists. Fuck Fashion Magazines. Fuck Models.

Fuck Personal Shoppers. Fuck Regional Hospitals. Fuck Road Rash.

Fuck Carpet Burns. Fuck Purple Nerples. Fuck Wet Willies. Fuck Delays.

Fuck Static Electricity. Fuck Perms. Fuck Obscurity. Fuck Fading Away.

Fuck Saying “Bra”. Fuck Saying “No Homo”. Fuck The Delaware River.

Fuck Sunday Sunday. Fuck Set Backs. Fuck Short Comings. Fuck Dyslexia.

Fuck Limitations. Fuck Sweater Vests. Fuck Selfie Sticks. Fuck Compulsion.

Fuck The Dark Web. Fuck Aesthetic Classes. Fuck In School Suspension.

Fuck Private Jets. Fuck Yachts. Fuck Armani. Fuck Corporate Buy Outs.

Fuck Gutless People. Fuck Passionless People. Fuck Pleasantry.

Fuck White Knuckling It. Fuck Photos At The End Of Roller Coasters.

Fuck Jacked Up Beer Prices At Concerts. Fuck Not Using Ones Turn Signal.

Fuck Gender Announcements Parties. Fuck Self Destruction.

Fuck Self Fulfilling Prophecy. Fuck Ms. Manners. Fuck Cutting.

Fuck People Who Bitch But Don’t Do Shit. Fuck Velcro. Fuck Speedos.

Fuck Welcome Mats. Fuck Metal Wind Chimes. Fuck Litter. Fuck Gin.

Fuck Horse Racing. Fuck Slot Machines. Fuck Online Gambling.

Fuck Mark Zuckerburg. Fuck Religious Persecution. Fuck Mormons.

Fuck Child Molesting Priests. Fuck Shunning. Fuck Tow Truck Fees.

Fuck Uninsured Drivers. Fuck Weigh Stations. Fuck Rest Stops.

Fuck Contradiction. Fuck Guessing. Fuck Anticlimactic Shit.

Fuck Probiotics. Fuck Anti Oxidants. Fuck Consumer Culture.

Fuck Duck Duck Goose. Fuck Choosing Teams. Fuck Sunday School.

Fuck Smart Cars. Fuck Wildfires. Fuck Sun Burn. Fuck Fake Balls On Trucks.

Fuck No Pain No Gain. Fuck Daylight Savings. Fuck Craft Cocktails.

Fuck People Who Are Nice To Your Face & Then Talk Shit Behind Your Back.

Fuck IPA Beers. Fuck Folly. Fuck Complacency. Fuck Taint Piercing.

Fuck Credit Cards. Fuck AnyDesk. Fuck Supremo. Fuck Team Viewer.

Fuck Team Viewer 13. Fuck Google Chrome. Fuck Curry. Fuck FBI SCAMS.

Fuck Illegal Call Centers. Fuck Scammers. Fuck Nagaland. Fuck Eating Ass.

Fuck Changing A Flat. FuckColonial Rule. Fuck Electric Bill Scams.

Fuck Ransomware. Fuck Grant Scams. Fuck Refund Scams. Fuck Tea.

Fuck FastSupport.Com. Fuck TechLiveConnect.Com. Fuck News Max.

Fuck Paddle Boats. Fuck Kayaks. Fuck Free Diving. Fuck Night Dives.

Fuck Tea Cozy’s. Fuck Dollies. Fuck Paying For Porn. Fuck Point & Click.

Fuck Dog Strollers. Fuck Instant Gratification. Fuck High Society.

Fuck Galas. Fuck Balls (Dance). Fuck Tuxedo Rentals. Fuck Bowling Shoes.

Fuck Sky Mall. Fuck Country Clubs. Fuck Civil War Reenactments.

Fuck Pink Slips. Fuck Blue Slips. Fuck No Fault States. Fuck Online Bullies.

Fuck Online Grooming. Fuck Rosemary. Fuck Pita Bread. Fuck Bland.

Fuck Common Place. Fuck Annexes. Fuck Sarah Collins. Fuck Saudi Arabia.

Fuck Classic Definitions. Fuck Grammar. Fuck Calculations. Fuck Al Gore.

Fuck Micheal Moore. Fuck The Worst Case Scenario. Fuck The Senate.

Fuck Fishing Licenses. Fuck Hunting Licenses. Fuck Gone With The Wind.

Fuck Girls Gone Wild. Fuck Black Friday. Fuck Cyber Monday. Fuck Futons.

Fuck Lawn Gnomes. Fuck Electric Weed Whackers. Fuck Lawn Furniture.

Fuck Electric Hedge Clippers. Fuck The Hair Of The Dog. Fuck Asbestos.

Fuck Whicker Furniture. Fuck All Bark & No Bite. Fuck Lead Paint Chips.

Fuck HBO’s Real Sex. Fuck Cultural Bias. Fuck The New School.

Fuck You CAn’t Teach An Old Dog New Tricks. Fuck Jeanie Pirro.

Fuck Metaphorical Crutches. Fuck The Band Green Jello. Fuck Tom Farr.

Fuck Standing Room Only. Fuck Selling Out. Fuck Compromising Principles.

Fuck The Band The Impotent Sea Snakes. Fuck John Bolton. Fuck Jeff Flake.

Fuck Scalpers. Fuck Limited Time Only. Fuck Rick Santorum. Fuck Sulfur.

Fuck Amway. Fuck Timeshares. Fuck Tupperware Parties. Fuck Gluten.

Fuck The Next Big Thing. Fuck Jerome Corsi. Fuck Mike Pompeo.

Fuck Cosmo Magazine. Fuck Artificially Flavored. Fuck Based On True Story.

Fuck Carbs. Fuck Lee Press On Nails. Fuck Immaturities. Fuck Bark Collars.

Fuck Mary Kay Cosmetics. Fuck Toxic Shock Syndrome. Fuck Pet Birds.

Fuck Tainted Drinking Water. Fuck Pipelines. Fuck Underwater Drilling.

Fuck Soft Paws. Fuck Declawing Ones Cat. Fuck Cheap Kitty Litter.

Fuck Fake Laughter. Fuck Laugh Tracks. Fuck IRS Scams.

Fuck Cindy Hyde-Smith. Fuck Saudi Prince Mohammad Bin Salman Al.

Fuck Mitt Romney. Fuck Rand Paul. Fuck Scott Walker. Fuck Marco Rubio.

Fuck Conservatives. Fuck Conservatism. Fuck Chris Christie.

Fuck Mike Huckabee. Fuck Judge Roy Moore. Fuck Wes Goodman.

Fuck Homework. Fuck The SATS. Fuck A Dull Knife. Fuck Omarosa.

Fuck Pat Meehan. Fuck Jeff Hoover. Fuck Herman Cain. Fuck Mike Duvall.

Fuck Larry Craig. Fuck Spoilers. Fuck Disorganization. Fuck Bob Allen.

Fuck Misrepresentations. Fuck Jack Ryan. Fuck Bob Packwood.

Fuck Buz Lukens. Fuck Roman Polanski. Fuck Dan Crane. Fuck Edison.

Fuck Robert Bauman. Fuck Obituaries. Fuck Charlie Crist. Fuck Dimwits.

Fuck Matt Wingard. Fuck ChatBots. Fuck Fitness Tracker. Fuck Fitbit.

Fuck The Echo Dot. Fuck Fire Sticks. Fuck Apple AirPods. Fuck Vinyl Pants.

And Most Of All……FUCK SANITY.

If You Read The Entire List Congratulations.

That is Some Extremely Hardcore Shit On Your Part.

Thanks for Reading

 By Les Sober

Try Scamming Me & I’ll Royally Fuck Up Your Day PT. 2: Counterstrike

 

I left off explaining in the last post that some Absurd Asshole(s) had contacted via text about trouble processing my Health Insurance Payment that was a BLATANT SCAM. In stead of flipping out and going batshit crazy with rage/revenge I would try a different plan. Here is what I did.

I did some Bong Rips and began to think about a plan. Now not only did I want to piss the Scam Artist off as much as they had me I also wanted it to be fun to do. I ended up coming around full circle by selecting Text Messaging as my form of communication versus Cell Phone Call. If I had chose to call the number included in the Text I know what the fuck would have happened.

I would have simply lost my shit and started cursing out the guy on the other end of the phone. The swearing then would be followed by a slew of insults and then violent threats of bodily harm. I seem to have inherited my Father’s intense source of Anger. My motto in situations like this is if you try and fuck with me or fuck me over I will return the favor 100 fold, BUT I digress.

Then I concocted a phony Movie Company Called Von Dire Films. Now Von Dire I thought should be a scummy, underground, indie, sleazy, offensive, and troubling films with titles like “Corpse Farm: A Return to Flesh” or some weird shit like that. I then came to the conclusion that Von Dire Films was a Self Promotional Merchandise Super Sluts who TEX BOMB the Hell out of random people hoping to secure some new fans/customers.

Here are some examples of the Von Dire Film Solicitation Texts:

Text 1.

You have reached Von Dire Movie Production Company. Unfortunately We are having budgetary issues while shooting our new Movie in Borneo called “Skull Fucking Your Bloody Skull”. We will be out of the Country for Filming for the next 8 weeks. Please leave any and all contact information pertaining to the specified project at Our Dark Web Website VonDiresFuckedUpFilm.Org

So to Our Fans We say “Fuck Off We’re Filming” & “Adios Assholes” so Thank You for Your interest in Von Dire International Snuff Film Productions LLC.

Text 2.

Von Dire Banned Films That with Mindfuck you like a Lobotomy!!!

WWW.VDBF.ORG

SUPER SICK SALE ALL WEEK LONG!!!!!!!!

Text 3.

Von Dire Film “Cannibalistic Coitus” Nominated for the Underground Picture of the Year at Cannes!!! Now Only $29.99!!!

See Our Website on the Dark Web for further details!!!

STAY SICK CITIZENS!!!!!!

TEXT 4.

VON DIRE IS BACK! in the Celluloid Slaughter Business with his new demented movie “Meat Hook Justice” Coming to American Theaters Feb. 14th 2018! ADVANCE TICKETS Sales Available Through Our Dark Web Website. SO SIGN IN, SHOP, AND STAY SICK!

Text 5.

Von Dire’s Ferral Film Festival set for Bucharest Sept. 18th 2018!!!

Gorepon Group Packages Available on our DARKEST WEBSITE!

HURRY BEFORE THEY SELL OUT!!!!!

GOREPONS START AT 12,000 BitCoin (Purchaser must have a Valid

PayPal account at time of Purchase)

Text 6.

Gorepon the Groupon of Grizzly Gore has current Tour Packages of

Killing Christ’s Kingdom Studios

VERY LIMITED TIME ON ONLY!!! DON’T THINK BUY. BUY.BUY.

TEXT 7.

VON DIRE Sinful Spoken Wicked Word Tour COMING SOON!!

Check Out Our Deepest Dark WebSite for Upcoming Information!!!

Have Your check books ready!!!!

Text 8.

Von Dire Biography 4 Sale!!! “Bloody Genital Mutilation: My Life Growing Up in Antartica” ON SALE! LIMITED NUMBER PRINTED!

ORDER NOW,NOW,NOW!!! (Sale Price 165 Euros) !!!

All We need is Your Social Security Card Number for verification of Purchase!

Text 9.

Von Dire Films Presents Bloody Sod Bollock’s

“Shoot My Face Off I Like It” Disturbing Documentary of Damnation

For Sale For LOW, LOW PRICE of 900 Yen!!!

All We Need is Your Debit Card Number and Pin Number!!!

Text 10.

Von Dire’s New Gothic Novel

“The Insurance Sucubus Slayer: Cannibalize The Conman”

Available now on BrutalBooks.Net for $49.99

All We Need is the Routing Number from a Personal Check!!!

Text 11.

Von Dire is Von Damit in “Demonic Dolphin Rape Cave 2”

Streaming on FuktFilms.Net for just the low price of $4.99 for

the 1st Minute and $2.99 each Additional Minute!!!!!

Text 12. “Lust and Lobotomies: The Jeffery Dalhmer Story” by Von Dire

Inspired by Real Life Insanity!!

Torn from the Headlines of Horror!!!!

On Sale Now For Just 17 Easy Payments of $59.99!!!!

Text 12.

Von Dire’s work will Haunt you!!!!

Check Out at Goddamn VOnDire.Org!!!

Text. 13

Von Dire Fan Club Enrolling NOW!!!

Von Dire’s Fan Club The Bloody Bastards has LIMITED OPENINGS!!!

Rare chance to become an actual Fan Club Member just Sign Up For

12 Months for $6,499.99!!!

9 Months for $4,995.99!!!

6 Months for $3,499.99!!!

3 Months for $1,499.99!!!

1 Month for just a mere $999.99

All You need to do is just send ALL Your Personal Banking Information to Us Via Our Deep Dark Dark Website!!

Text 13.

“Suck My Ass It Smells” the Von Dire GG Allin Punkumentary Slated for Release in FALL 2019!!! ADVANCE TICKETS FOR SALE!!!! BUY NOW!!!!!

Text 14.

It has come to Our attention that you haven’t purchased anything in QUITE A WHILE!

Please contact Us IMMEDIATELY with Your Credit Card Information Ready!!!

VON DIRE FILMS LLC “The Sickest Shit on Celluloid!!!”

LOG IN NOW! NOW! NOW! BUY! BUY! BUY! TODAY! TODAY! TODAY!!

Text 15.

WHY haven’t YOU visited Our Deep Website VonDire.Org Website??????

Please Stop and SHOP! SHOP! SHOP!

Deals! Sales! Discounts!! DOUBLE Fan Club Member Points!!!!!

Text 16.

It has come to the attention of Our Billing Department that You have an Outstanding OVER DUE Payment Pending for $749,999.99.

Contact Us IMMEDIATELY to Address this URGENT MATTER to Avoid Further Fines/Penalties before its TOO LATE!!

If You FAIL to contact us within 24 hours We will turn Your Current Past Due Amount over to The United States Federal Debt Collection Agency.

It be in Your Best Interest to CALL US TODAY and PAY Without Thinking or Questioning it. You can also Log Onto Our Darkest Website and SPEND the Equivalent on Merchandise.

Text 17.

You’ve been CAUGHT by MasterLock Security Monitoring Systems on Illegal    Von Dire DarkWeb Movie sites.

These Sites contained depictions of Extreme Fetishes, Donkey Shows, Eating Feces, Platypus Rape, S&M&B&D&GT, Pygmy Gangbangs, Live Sex Acts preformed by Sea Monkeys, Defamation of the Dead, Necrophilia, HillBilly Incest, Cattle Decapitation, Sex with Star Fishes, Genital Mutilation, Uniques, Rectal Insertion of Foreign Objects, Triple Fisting, Nipple Clamp Carnage, Group Masturbation, Coffin Coitus, Blood Lust Orgies, Vaginal Vomiting, Testicular Torture, Midgets Running a Train on a WNBA Center, Amputee Stump Humping, Skull Fucking, Ejaculating Blood, Among Other Offenses.

If You Do Not PAY the Fine of $15,499.99 to Us in Target Gift Cards OR Cigarettes WE WILL REPORT YOU TO THE NSA IMMEDIATELY POST HASTE!

Text 18.

Cunt-Fart & The Rotten Peckers have just signed a contract to record the entire Soundtrack for Von Dire’s Short Student Art Film

“Sadistic Sex Slug Sodomy”

Release due February 1st at MIDNIGHT through Our Super Sick Website!!!

Members get unlimited listening!!!

So Send Us a Photocopy of Your Driver’s License and a Blank Persona Check or Debit Card!!!!

ONLY $975.99 While Supplies Last BUY NOW WITHOUT DELAY!!!!!!

Shitting and Fondling Included for an Additional Fee of $64.99!!!

Text 19.

Visit VONDIREMERCH.ORG(Y).NET NOW!!!!HURRY!!! GO!!!!

Discount Sale Starts This Friday at Midnight on Our Sick As Shit Website TODAY!!!

BE THERE YOU BASTARDS & BITCHES!!!!!

Text 20.

Authentic Bulgarian Bahhbahchoubpa  Available TODAY!!!!

Grown EXCLUSIVELY at Von Dire Feral Farms in the Sunless Lithuanian Country Side!!

JUST A MEASLY $49.99 a Bushel!!!!! LOGON TO OUR Sinful Website for Purchasing Information TODAY!!!!!

Text 21.

Von Dire Office Yard Sale is going on this Weekend!!!!

This is YOUR rare and utterly exclusive chance as a Fucked Up Fan Club Member to PURCHASE SPECIAL MERCHANDISE ITEMS SUCH AS:

A Mason Jar of Von Dire’s Shaved Pubes, VD’s PERSONAL ANTIQUE Genital Torture Kit, VD’s diseased and stuffed Pet Electric Eel, VD’s office Urinal, The German Industrial Nipple Clamps from VD’s Outfit he wore to the Vomitous Awards in 1993, AND SOOOOO MUCH MORE!!!! LOG ON NOW LEMMINGS!!!

Text 22.

Von Dire’s Scummy Spoken Word Collection “Decade of Debauchery” consists of the 1979-1991 Spoken Word Tours of  Guam. ONLY $99.99! LOG ON AND BUY NOW and BUY A COPY FOR A FRIEND OR FAMILY MEMBER NOW!!

Text 23.

Von Dire’s Lost Movie has just been Found!!!!

“Cockring Carnival of Karnal Cock Carnage 1888”

One of Von Dire’s 1st Films found misplaced in the Lost Soul Studios’s Film Vault!!!! ONLY $179.99!

EXTREMELY LIMITED TIME ONLY!!! This is a one time 36 Hour Special Secret Sale!!! Buy Several Copies NOW!!!

Text 24.

Von Dire POP UP RESTAURANT The VD Clinic IS HERE Tonight!!!

Just a small fee of $299.99 Per Person and $499.99 Per Plate!!!!

Dinner Includes:

Specialty Corrosive Cocktails, 17 Course Dinner (with the Main Course Being Bison imported from the Croatia), Damnable Dessert,  and Sinister Cigars served with 110 year old cognac from Turkey.

PLUS A SPECIAL SHOWING OF VD Video Productions Catalog BUT HURRY SALE ENDS IN 76 Minutes!!

Text 25.

BREAKING NEWS!!! THIS JUST IN!!!!

Von Dire Dick Pics Leaked on

HollywoodHardons.com!!!!!!

NOTE TO READER: The texts above were sent starting Monday 6:15 am and Wednesday 11:39am. That would have been the end of it, BUT on Wednesday at 2:47 pm The Absurd Assholes sent me yet ANOTHER TEXT. The text was the same deplete piece of shit cheap ass scam bullshit as the last previous 3. Thusly at 7:48 Wednesday I returned to my antagonistic ways.

Text 1.

“Throbbing Taints and the Shitty Assholes” a Film By the Legendary Deplorable Director VON DIRE is a Political Commentary Documentary on the current sate of political affairs throughout this Evil Earth. Von Dire has already announced He will be filming the sequel “TrumpFucker: A Legacy of Failure” solely focusing on Donald Trump.

ADVANCE COPIES AVAILABLE FOR 210 BITCOINS!! CHECK OUT OUR SICKLY WEBSITE!! SOONER THE BETTER, BUY NOW!!

TEXT 2.

“Crippled Faith” is a collection of Gothic Poems about Death and Desire by none other than VON DIRE’S Little Bastard Brother VAN DIRE!! The book was released by Putrid Publishing which is his Older Brother VON DIRE’s Publishing House known mostly for publishing “Necrophilia Noir” a instructional guide for beginner Necrophiliac.

AVAILABLE AT OUR WEBSITE!!!

All We Need is a photocopy of Your Personal Financial Statements such as Banking Statement, to Complete Your Purchase RIGHT FUCKING NOW BITCHES!!!

Text 3.

Von Dire’s band SlutFuck will be playing a limited number of secret acoustic Tour all during the month of March.

DON’T MISS SLUTFUCK’S “EATING THE ASS OUTTA A DEAD DINGO” TOUR

WHERE WILL THEY BE PLAYING YOU ASK???!!

Log On to Our Wretched WebSite where You and Your Friends can PURCHASE CLUES to help You to locate a Secret Show NEAR YOU!!

The Cost Per Clue is Only $29.99!!! ACT NOW, BUY NOW!!!!!!

Text 4.

Cocktails To The Tits: A Von Dire Meet & Greet scheduled before the debut of VD’s most recent Diseased Film “The Cyclops: Cycle of  Shitty Sex, Unbearable Sin, and the Abominable Aftermath”

Saturday Midnight Showing down at The Barfly Lounge!!!

Meet & Greet Passes $349.99 and Film Tickets for ADDITIONAL $74.99!!

Call The BarFly Lounge For Details RIGHT FUCKING NOW BABY!!!

Text 5.

“Zombie Hooker Handjobs” a Sick Flick by One of the most despised film makers in MOVIE HISTORY Von Dire’s Eldest Son Vin Dire!! COMING SPRING 2019!!!

Text 6.

“The Scumfuck Tradition & Legendary Luridness”

Von Dire’s FAMOUS AWARD WINNING ROCKUMENTARY chronicles Iconic Underground Hardcore Porno Punk Bands Such as the Following:

The Fuck Me Pumps, SlutFucker ( a SlutFuck Tribute Band), Slore, The Shitty Shitty Gangbangers, Agent Alien Anal X, The Prolapsed Rectums, Anti-All, Puss Buster, Rectal Invasion, Muff Diver & The Bull Dykes, Fighters and Fuckers, The Les Sober Scumbag 6, The Gash, Up To The Nuts In Guts, The Young Cocksmen, Hairy Clam and The Beavers, Death To Dipshits, Fuck Your Face, Mr. Fister, Cunt-Fart, Mangled Manginas, Vag The Impaler, Manstruation, The Salty Yogurt Slingers, Molested Melvin, The Perv’s, Rectal Leakage, The Bastards, and MANY MORE!!!!

Just Send Us the Deed to Your House as Payment!!! Purchase NOW!!!

Text 7.

Von Dire Presents “Disemboweling The Dead” a Perverse Film from Celluloid Sinn with LIMITED SHOWINGS AVAILABLE NOW STREAMING ON OUR SINFUL WEBSITE!!!! ONLY $197.60!!! ACT NOW!!!

Text 8.

The Sultan of Slaughter, The Duke of The Damned, The King of Corpses, The Barron of Blood, The Price of Perversion, The President of the Perverse, The Prime Minister of Sinister VON DIRE RETURNS AFTER 2 YEAR ABSENCE!!!!!

“Mouth Full of Maggots” is Von Dire’s Return to the Wretched Movie!!!

Already Banned in 49 States and 42 Countries World Wide!!!

Available in 90 Days for $129.99 or an Advance Copy for just $119.99!!!

Text 9.

The Von Dire Movie “Gargling With Broken Glass” is now available fully remastered in GORE VISON !! Available Now For $665.99!! Gore Vision Glasses NOT INCLUDED! Gore Vison Glasses SOLD SEPARATELY and can be PURCHASED for $349.99!!!

Text 10.

The Satanic Semen Society to induct Infamous Film Maker VON DIRE into the Sleaze Hall Of Fame on Julember 32nd!!! Watch the Induction on PPV On Demand for $49.99 or Stream it LIVE on our Sinister Website for $74.99!!!!

Text 11.

BREAKING NEWS!! YUGOSLAVIAN FILTH FILM DIRECTOR VON DIRE!!!

VON DIRE was Arrested and charged with Crimes Against the Indigenous People of PogoPogo while filming his latest movie

“The Bloody Savages of The Flesh Forrst”

Stay Up To Date on this SHOCKING News Story by Subscribing to Our NEW YOURUBE Channel for a Low Monthly Charge of $79.99!!

WTF R U WAITING 4?!!

 

That My Readers is where it has ended for now, and We will have to wait and see if this situation will continue in the near future/future.

Thanks For Reading,

Les Sober