Tag: dying

Another Good Man Is Dead

It’s a Truly Sad Day here at FYB as I found out Earlier Today that My Oldest and Dearest Friends Mike BlueJetSki Dies to Soon Last Night of Congestive Heart Failure. Ever Since I found Out the World Seems to Be Somewhat Off as if Reality has Suddenly gone Askew. Another Fallen Friend to Bid Farewell   to Another Death, Another Celebration of Deceased’s Life, Another Grave Needs Filling.

I’m not what You would call a Sentimental sort of Person so This is Far, Far, Far from any Biographical Memoire, but Alas I still have Shit to Say. I met Mike when I switched Schools right Before 9th Grade. It’s needless to say High School fucking Sucks, and Teenagers are Assholes so being an Interloper in a Group of fellow Students who have been fucking Classmates since fucking Elementary School. Mike was the First Person to approach Me and extend His Hand in Friendship.

Mike was an extremely Talented Self Taught Guitarist who I had the distinct Pleasure of Playing with in Several High School Bands with such as Burnt Toast, The Severed Heads, Rules of a Riot, The Satanic MC Collective, Shit Out of Luck, Far From Sober, and most Notably Stank Breath. Mike and I were part of the Motley Crew of Heavy Metal Loving, Pot Smoking, Underage Drinking Head Banger Slackers who’s only real accomplishment was Not Dropping Out or Flunking out of High School. For some in Our Circle of Friends that was a Tall Order I assure You.

           

Mike was also an Amazing Mechanic who was Born with a Natural Talent for Working with His Hands. I stopped by Mike’s Grandmothers House where Mike was Helping Her Clean Out Her Cluttered Attic. While Rummaging Through the Contents of the Attic Mike had come across His Grandfather’s Korean War Rifle. Now Mike had Obviously never seen a Korean War Rifle since He was Born After the Korean War Itself. It took Mike Meer Minutes to Completely Disassemble the Rifle, Clean it, and Reassemble it Flawlessly in Perfect Working Order .

During Our Junior Year of High School Mike’s Mother Started Dating since Sad to Say Mike’s Father had Died at an Early Age as Well of Heart Related Issues (The Kicker was He was on Medication that would have kept Him alive Accept for a Short Period He couldn’t Afford it and Paying the Bills. Talk about putting Family First and True Sacrifice.) a few Years before I met Him. Mike’s Mom was a Unconventional Character who was Honestly Quite Lonely and wanted Someone, Anyone really to Live out the Rest of Her Days With. After a long line of fucking Loser’s She impulsively Married a Southern Religious Fanatic and Old School Racist Asshole Don without Ever meeting Him in Person Prior to the Wedding (this was Pre Internet so They had to write actual Letters and Use Landlines to Communicate.)

Mike’s Mom suddenly announced one Day soon after Marrying Don the Dick to Dothan Alabama of all fucking Shitholes because thats were Don and His Family Lived, and They (Mike and His Siblings) had just under 2 weeks to get Their Shit Together before the Actual Moving Day. Again back in those Days there Weren’t wasn’t the Internet or Social Media or Skype so as I said communication could be Slow and for that matter inconsistent. The Only other Option outside of Snail Mail was Land Lines that Charged a small fucking fortune for Long Distance Calls. Being Teenagers Niether Mike nor I had any Money or source of Income so I could Move with Mike, and Mike couldn’t Move Back.

           

I did manage to Sell Enough Pot to Visit Mike During Spring Break to Don’s Dismay in Fact Don Claimed that if I came to Visit I’d “Bring the Devil to Alabama.” which being a Heavy Metal Fan and Teenager I thought was pretty fucking bad ass. In the End Mike’s Mom Divorced Don who became Mentally Unstable increasingly more and more as Time Passed. One Day Mike found Don sitting in the Kitchen with a Loaded Shotgun ranting about Murdering Mike. Mike tackled Don who was out of Shape and Obese and Wrenched the Shotgun from Him which He then locked in the Trunk of His car for Safe Keeping.

Mike was seriously one of the Most Artistically creative People I have EVER had the Sincere Pleasure of Knowing. Mike could Improvise like a Motherfucker No Matter what was Going On Mike could whip up a Song, Fictional Character, Short Story, or Movie Plot just to name a Few of Mike’s Natural Born Talents. Mike was the Ultimate Creative Collaborator the Synergy was fucking Insane like Two People living as One. Mike was the kind of Friend that We didn’t even Need to Talk, No verbalization Necessary to Communicate through just a series of Looks You’d know exactly what either of Us was Thinking/Feeling. It was Uncanny it Really fucking was. I image that being Friends with Mike equated to the Unexplained Link between sets of Twins.

Mike was also one of the Friendliest, Most Open Minded, Loyal, Caring, and Zen like People to ever walk the fucking Planet. I appreciated that being an Introvert who Spends Far too much Time in My own Head (sometimes to My Detriment) being Motivated by My Emotions. One of if not the Best piece of fucking Advice that has served Me well Over a Vast number of Years I got From Mike. I forget the exact Details other than We were Hanging Out in some Public Place, and I started to get Paranoid as a Motherfucker for some reason I can’t Remember. Mike Stared Me Dead in the Eye and in all seriousness said “Maybe what You think is going on ISN’T Going on because its all in Your Head??!”

           

Sad to Say that for Several Years Mike and I lost Touch until Our fucking Cliche finding One Another on (and it Pains Me so to Admit) Facebook back before Zuckerberg and I got into Our Battle of Wills. I will say this One of the first fucking things I did when the Bullshit FB shit happened I almost immediately exchanged Phone Numbers to Keep FB communications to a minimum. Unfortunately I ended up Abandoning Facebook which inadvertently lead to another Period of Separation if You will. Time went by and We ironically reconnected again on FaceBook, but it was Through My Wife who acted as My FB Middle Woman. From then on We talked several times a Month, but the Coolest Part was no matter how long it had been once We were reunited it wasn’t awkward or Weird in Any way whatsoever. Mike and I would simply Pick Up exactly whereWe left Off like No Time had passed at all.

My One and Only Regret is Not Seeing Mike in Person Face to Face since the Trip I took Junior Year to Visit Him. Technology has the Power to Connect, But it has No Personality. Some things can Only be done in Person there is absolutely No Technical Equivalent and Never fucking will be.

           

In Closing : I will Never Forget or Stop Missing My Dearly Departed Friend who I am sure is Giving Them Hell in Heaven.

Thanks for Giving a Shit & Reading,

By Les Sober

The Human Hypocrisy in Death

Ever since Humanity Evolved the Intellectual Ability to Comprehend Death, that ALL things including Us will Die, and there’s No fucking Way around it. Due to the Fear of the Unknown (or in this case what May or May not lie Beyond in the Realm of Death) has Spawned everything from Organized Religion to The Exploration for an Actual Psychical Fountain of Youth.

All this Time, Effort, Money, and Concern in an Attempt to Cheat or Deny Death in the End. Forever Chasing The Ultimate Prize, the Trophy of Immortality.

There is though One Fate more Dreaded Than Death Itself, and thats To Linger barely holding on to Life while Sick, Suffering, and Wallowing in Pain.

       

So its No Wonder when it comes to People’s Beloved Animals once They come into Their Golden Years  or to put it simply They Become Four Legged Senior Citizens. Once Our Pets Succumb to the Ravages of Old Age, As Their Teeth turn to Shit, They Loose Weight as well as Muscle Mass, Arthritis Takes Hold, Mobility and Bladder Control become An Issue, Senility, Their Eye Sight Dwindles, The Hearing goes Deaf, and We Deem that as “Having No Quality of Life”.We make one of the Hardest Calls Ever.

It’s said one of if not the Greatest Tragedy a Parent can face is Losing a Child because You’re Not meant to Out Live Your Children .They Out Live You and thats the Way it Is. Now based on that argument Pet Owners go through the same feelings of Loss, Depression, and Hopelessness as Parents do when They loose a Child, BUT Pet Owners will Experience such a Life Changing Loss Many, Many times during Their Lives.

          

As Humans We have Empathy and Compassion for Our Aged Animals, and would Never want to Prolong the Life of a Pet when all it has to Look Forward to is Slowly Suffering as it Creeps towards the Light. That is Why Not Only do We have Veterinarians to Heal/Cure Our Sick or Injured Pets, BUT, Veterinarians Provide a Service that is Alien in the World of Human Healthcare and that’s Euthanasia. And the Reason We have Euthanasia is to Relieve Our beloved Pets from Any and All Further Suffering. We all agree it’s the HUMANE thing to Do.

The Story though is Far Different when it comes to Humans and Death. Human’s for whatever reason can Justify the Sickness and Suffering of Elderly Family Members in particular. When a Relative becomes Gravely Ill and Whose’s End is Imminent We want Them to Be Pain Free and as Comfortable as Possible, BUT WE WON’T LET GO.

          

We throw Time, Money, Diagnostics, Medications, Tests, Medical Machines, Surgeries, and Doctors into the Mix to PROLONG a Loved One because THEY don’t want Them do Pass. People are fucking Selfish. People tend to Act in Their OWN Best Interest (Basically “I don’t want So-N-So to Die”) rather than that of The Sick and Suffering Family Member.

This Behavior has struck Fear into Many a Person’s Heart. The idea of Being Bed Ridden, Muddle Minded, In Pain, Soiling Ones Self, and Inability to Bath or Feed Oneself Trapped in the Confines of a Hospital Bed basking in the Soul sucking Florescent Lights. No One wants to Languish like a Living Corpse plugged into Menacing Medical Machines unable to Decide Your Own Fate as You wait Praying for the Sweet Release of Death.

          

This Fear gave Birth to a New Trend if You will The DO NOT RESUSCITATE (DNR) MOVEMENT.  A DNR is often referred to as a “NO CODE”, an Advance Directive Document that Guides Medical Personnel to NOT PREFORM CPR or Otherwise try to Revive You/Family Member/Dear Friend if Their Heart has Stopped.

Once the Idea caught on DNR LEVELS were implemented which are as Follows:

Level 1: Stay in a Facility, and be kept Comfortable, BUT NOT Given Antibiotics or Other Medications to Cure You.

Level 2: Stay in a Facility and Receive ALL Medications AND Treatments possible Within Said Facility.

Level 3: To Be Transferred to a Hospital from a Nursing Facility, BUT NOT given CPR or Taken to Intensive Care.

Level 4: Be taken to a Hospital and Given ALL  Possible Medical Interventions. DO EVERYTHING POSSIBLE.

Note: Level 1 and Level 2 Allow Someone to Die Naturally in Familiar Surroundings. Also Some States use Different Terms Such as:

AND: Stands for ALLOW NATURAL DEATH, used in End of Life Situations to be Clear that an End is Anticipated and the Natural Consequences of the Condition are Allowed to Proceed.

DNAR: DO NOT ATTEMPT RESUSCITATION, this should be Accompanied by SPECIFICS of which Forms of Interventions Can or Can Not be Used if One’s Heart Stops Beating.

The Moral to this Twisted Tale is This: Figure Out Your Personal Medical Wishes, and More Importantly MAKE THEM ABUNDANTLY KNOWN so They will be Honored.

       

(Note: Living Wills Don’t Mean Shit in the Medical World as there is so much bullshit Red Tape that Living Wills are Almost NEVER HONORED because the Hospital and Doctors have to Legally Cover Their Asses.)

Thanks for Reading,

  By Les Sober (12:47am)