fetish – f-your blog

Grindcore, Goregrind, & Pornogrind It’s All Good

Welcome to Today’s FYB Post Pertaining to Generes Gridcore, Goregrind, & Pornogrind Music. One of the Most Entertaining Factor’s of these Niche Genres is that the Music/Album Art/Lyrics are an Unofficial Ongoing Competition. The Competition amongst the Type of Bands is to be MORE Obscene, Violent, Gory, Shocking, Repulsive, and Offensive than Their Contemporaries. For Those Who May Not be aware Here is a Very Brief Description of Each of the Aforementioned Musical Genres.

GRINDCORE: Grindcore is a More Noise Filled Style of Hardcore Punk while using Hardcore’s Trademark Characteristics like Heavily Distorted, Down Tuned Guitars, Grinding Overdriven Bass, High Speed Tempo, Blast Beats, and Unique Vocal Style that Consists of Growls, Grunts, Screaming, High Pitched Shrieks, and Guttural.

GOREGRIND: Goregrind (a Sub Genre of Grindcore) is Defined by Detuned Guitars, Blasting Drums (Sometimes with a High Tuned, Clanging ‘Biscuit Tin’ Snare Drum Sound), Sickening Lyrics, and Utilize EXTREMELY LOW or Pitch Shifted Vocals Often sounding like Pig Grunts and Squeals.

PORNOGRIND: Pornogrind is Related to the Goregrind Subgenre that’s General Themes are Centered Around Sexual Themes. Common Pornorgrind Reoccurring Themes are Porno, Fetishes, Fucking, Girls, Murder, and Gore. Pornogrind also uses Revolting Sound Effects to add an Additional Gross Out Factor/ Offensive Factor including, BUT Not limited to Fart Sound Effects, Explosive Diarrhea, Projectile Vomiting, Porno or Horror Movie Clips, and Violence.

So with all that shit when I get Bored or have some Time to Kill I do dumb shit like Coming Up with Either Or Grindcore/Goregrind/Pornogrind Band Names or Album Titles. Now Here is the List I have Created and Compiled over Time.

1. Queen Face 2. Smeghead 3. Rotting Cunt

4. Cavernous Cunt 5. Rectal Discharge 6. Assface

7. Vaginal Invasion 8. Cock Rot 9. Eat Shit

10. Rotten Pecker 11. Full Blow Aides To The Face

12. Point Blank Buttfuck 13. The Kings Of Bukkake 14.Shit Out Of Luck

15. Bloody Feces 16. Brutal Bukkake 17. Parasitic Pussy 18. Vaggash

19. Vaginal Jesus 20. Decomposing Clit 21.Decaying Genital

22. 10″ Taint 23. Rectal Birth 24. Vaginal Enema. 25. Sex Piss

26. Rotting Vag 27. Decomposing Cunts 28. Pussy Pie 29. Fuck Stick

30. STD (Sex Torture Death) 31. Mangled Genitals 32. Crotch Rot

33. Vaginal Vomit 34. Rectal Vaginitis 35. Rectal Prolapse 36. Ass Meat

37. Oozing Cunt 38. Cannibalistic Syphilis 39. Vaginal Discourse

40. Ejaculation Feces 41. Cuntfuck 42. Cuntfucker 43. Cunt Fucked

44. Up To The Nuts In Guts 45. Gash Slasher 46. Kick In The Cunt

47. Nipple Clamp Execution 48. Asseaters 49. Eater Of Ass

50. Castrate Christ 51. Piss Christ 52. Anal Abortion

53. Anal Alien Invaders 54. Rectal Invasion 55. AssFuck. 56. Assfucked

57. AssFucker 58. Anal Impalement 59. Cockrockers

60. Vaginal Defication 61. Anal Fisher 62. Rectum Stretcher

63. Necrosexual 64. Severed Genitals 65. Sodomized By Satan

66. Shitty Shitty Gangbang 67. Fletch 68. Cum Here

69. The Young Cocksmen 70. The Salty Yogurt Slingers 71. 3 Whole Whore

72. Menstruation Massacre 73. Autopsy Sodomy 74. Fuck The Dead

75. Defiling Corpse 76. Whoremonger 77. Analocolypse

78. Buttmeat Penis 79. Diarrhea Sluts 80. Fucked With Feces

81. Fuckacide 82. Hate Fuck. 83. Ragerrection 84. Rage Shit

85. Drunk As Fuck 86. Anal Gape 87. Skullfucker 88.Skullfucked

89. Whorebitch 90. Flesh Peddler 91. Smut 92. Bull Dyke

93. Smut Peddler 94. Venomous Vaginas 95. Cunt Full Of Teeth

96. Rectum Ripper 97. Analize 98. Analecotmy 99. Muff Diver

100. Muff Divers 101. Lusting Lipstick Lesbians 102. Hair Pie

103. The Rimjobs 104. Jerk Off Jerry And The Wankers 105. Fuck You Phil

106. Jack Off Jack 107. The Jerk Offs 108. The Motherfuckers

109. Fuck The Fetus 110. Gangrenous Genitals 111. Ass Splatter

112. Cum Guzzler 113. Cum Gargler 114. Cumsplat 115. Cum Stain

116. Shit Stain 117. SuckaFuck 118. Fuckass 119. Monster Cunt

120. Mung 121. Clitlicker 122. Bloody Stool 123. Anal Seepage

124. Septic Semen 125. Toxic Shock Syndrome 126. Sloppy Snatch

127. Beef Curtains 128. Beefy Cunt 129. Cuntasaurous Sex. 130. Cock Snot

131. Death Shart 132.Blood Shart. 133. Jack MeOff

134. Dirty Fucking Junkie 135. Let’s Hump 136. Milkshake Shits

137. Gas Station Sushi Shits 138. Shit Soup 139. Bowling For Feces

140. Shitting Soup 141. Starting On My Balls 142. The Squirters

143. Shitting On Seinfeld 144. Tumbleweed Toilet Paper 145. Poopatorium

146. Shitting My Ass Off 147. Hey You Shitter 148. Public Toilet Terrorist

149. The Carp Trap 150. The Creepy Crapper 151. The Shittening

152. Shitocolypse 153. Shiatacane Season 154. The Shit Abyss

155. Shit Sandwich 156. Tall Glass Of Shut The Fuck Up 157. What A Turd

158. Bullshitter 159. Bullshiting a Bullshitter 160. Home Of Halitosis

161. Outhouse Whore 162. Praying To The Porcelain God 163. Craptacular

164. Vomiting Out My Ass 165. ABS (Always BE Shitting)

166. The Colonic King 167. Eatable Enema 168. Punks Proctologist

169. Itchy Asshole Issues 170. Diarrhea Downpour 171.Shitting Skies

172. The Terrible Turd 173. Ass Eating Asshole 174. Don’t Give A Shit

175. Go Shit Yourself 176. Taking A Dump At The Dump 177. Shiticide

178. The Poop Deck Problem 179. Fun With Feces 180. Smells Like Shit

181. Scatological Studies 182. Institute of Scatology 183. I Be Shitting (IBS)

184. I Gotta Take A Shit 185. The Gay Buday 186. Rectum Ripper

187. This Restroom Is A Shithole 188. I Can’t Stop Shitting 189. Blumpkin

190. I Shit Blood 191. Bongs And Dongs 192. Poop Porn 193. Shitty Tits

194. Titty Fucking Fool 195. Fucked With Feces 196. Shit On You

197. From Pooping To Prolapse 198. Surgically Reconstructed Asshole

199. Who’s This Asshole?! 200. Scummy Shit 201. Shady As Shit

202. Sleazy Shit 203. Hot As Shit 204. Hot Shit 205. In The Shit

206. WHat’s This Shit?! 207. Knew Deep In Shit 208. Stupid Shit

209. Up Shit Creek Without A Paddle 210. Doomsday Dildos

211. Toilet Seat Sluts 212. Gas Pump Pimps 213. Urinal Euphoria

214. Who gives A Shit? 215. Fuck My Life 216. Well Shit On Me

217. Take This Happy Horseshit And Shove It Up Your Ass

218. I Call Bullshit 219. Pure Manure 220. Uncut Cocaine 221. Piss’n Shit

222. Nutting Narcotics 223. Puking On My Cock While Taking A Shit

224. I’m Having A Shit 225. Fecal Float 226. Rim Job Jerk Offs

227. Looking For Dummies 228. Tube Steak Sizzler 229. Shit Stew

230. There’s A Shitstorm Brewing In My Bowels

231. King Of The Crapper 232. Seriously Sinister Shit 233. Old School Shit

234. Old School Shit 235. Being A Total Dick 236. Shitting On Your Parade

237. Shitwich 238. Legend Of The 2 Pound Turd 239. Talking Shit

238. Sometime You Gotta Eat Shit 239. Sneaky Little Shit

240. Rectum Stretching Shit 241. Butt Plugged 242. Shit Happens

243. The Story Of Shitty Bill 244. The Asshole Anthem 245. Shit Talker

246. Talking Shit While Taking A Shit 247. Shit Talking Assholes

248. Bullshit Artist 249. Bullshitters Anonymous 250. Asswipe Arron

251. The Butthole Blues 252. The Butt Trumpet Orchestra 253. Tough Shit

254. All Ass Instrumental 255. Sodomized With Shit 256. Shit For Brains

257. Teddy The Talking Turd 258. Bruised Buttholes 259. Shit Shake

260. Teaing Off Heads And Shitting Down Necks 261. Suck Shit

262. You Butt Hurt About it Bro?! 263. Anal Armageddon 263. Shitcile

264. Empire Of Assholes 265. Mr. Brown Eye 266. A World Of Shit

268. Crap Covered Cornhole 269. Cornholing Drunks

270. The Mangina Monologues 271. Mangled Mangina

272. Shit On A Shingle 273. Donkey Punched In The Fart Box

274. Starring In The Eyes Of My Ass 275. Shitty Shit 276. Craptacular

277. Opinons And Assholes 278. I’m Going To Shit On Your Grave

279. Shit Your Shorts 280. Welcome To The Shitshow

281. I Shit On Squatty Potties 282. Port-A-Potty Poet

283. Public Restroom Retards 284. Fucktarded 285. Turd Polish

286. Your Shit DOES STINK 287. Shit Stink 288. Stank Breath

289. Crap On A Cracker 290.Holy Shit 291. Happy As A Pig In Shit

292. I See Shitty People 293. The Constipation Conundrum

294. Are Farts Supposed To Be Lumpy?! 295. Fire In The Hole

296. Hairy Hump Hole 297. Tastes Like Ass 298. Smells Like Shit In Here

299. Up Your Ass And To The Left 300. Fistfucker 301. Fistfucked

302. The Shocker 303. Backdoor Bitches 304. Bitches & Bastards

305. Up The Shitter (UTS) 306. Nice Ass Can I Eat Breakfast Off It?!

307. Hershey Squirts 308. Accidentally Crapping On The Carpet

309. Shit City 310. Shitty City 311. City Of Shit 312. Front To Back

313. Shitting Out Of Control 314. Shite Ain’t Right

315. Flatulence The Pre Poop Warning 316. There’s A Turd On My Taint

317. Assembly Of Assholes 318. Shitty Like An Asshole

319. Songs To Shit To 320. Assclown Circus 321. Hemorrhoid Hell

322. Straining To Shit 323. Getting Shitfaced Again 324. The Brown Note

325. Friendly Ass Biter 326. Colostomy Bag Boy 327. Assgasm

328. The Butthole Loophole 329. Skinny Chicks With Boney Butts

330. Shitting Yourself Insane 331. Life In A World Of Shit

332. Get To Shitting 333. Stop Being A Dick 334.Septic Tank Sayings

335. Shitbag 336. Coffee Makes Me Crap 337. WTF Is Anal Leakage?!

338. Ass Cancer 339. Booty Bombs 340. Booty Bandit 341. Shit Sale

342. Toilet Tunes 343. Filling The Turd Bucket 344. Sleep Fart Syndrome

345. Human Pooper Scooper 346. Cum Dumpster Fire

347. Watch My Back While I Take A Shit 348. Shit People Say

349. You Don’t Know Shit 350. Steaming Pile Of Poop

351. Steaming Pile of Shit 352. 3 Flush Floater 353. It’s The Season Of Shit

354. Toilet Plunger Possibilities 355. Shitting Like A Savage

356. Drain-O A GoGo 357. Shitheads Vs. Dickheads 358. Shitface

359. Sick As Shit 360. Can’t Bullshit A Bullshitter 361. Shit The Bed

362. Flush That Turd Down The Drain 363. She Seriously Shits The Sheets

364. Elbows And Assholes 365. Piss Pot Princess 366. Shat Splatter

367. Shat Is Where It Is At 368. 2 Ply Or Goodbye 369. Rid-Ex Sex

370. The Difference Between Assholes And Holes In The Ground

371. I Can’t Find My Ass With Both Hands 372. Bed Pan Splash Back

373. Pay To Poop 374.Shake It More Then Twice You’re Playing With It

374. Mondo Duke 375. Papa Starts 376. MC Bubble Guts

377. Outrageous Asshole 378. Vile Vagina 379. Clusterfucked

380. Cannibalizing Cunts 381. Rectal Vomit 382. Puke Porn

383. Malevolent Masturbation 384. Oily Fart 385. Sweaty Under Boob

386. Corroded Clit 387. Pussy Fart. 388. Necrophalic

389. Triple X Sex 390. Fuck Films 391. Porn Shop Prostitutes

392. Making Asshole Get Angry (MAGA) 393. Long Pig Penis

394. Hell If I Know 395. Cock Knocker 396. Spermicidal Jellyfish

397. Nut Sack Sinners 398. FuckSlut 399. Cunt Fart 400.The Manginas

401. The Fuck Me Pumps 402. The Gash 403. The Furious Fist Fucking 5

404. To The Tits 405. Poor Drunk Bastards 406. Manwhore

407. Hungry Hungry Hookers 408. Homocide 409. Crusty Clam

410. Harry Taco And The One Eyed Worms 411. Fight Anal Retention

412. Humphole 413. The DPs 414. Force Fed Feces 415. Puking Piss

416. Shit Smear 417. Glory Hole Gods 418. Urinal Utopia

419. The Bellends 420. Fucked For Life 421. GOPieces Of Shit

422. Republicunts 423. The Slutty Whores 424. Whorish

425. Motherhumping Christ 426. Christ’s Cunt 427. Jesus Fucking Christ

428. Here Comes The Fuck 429. The Anal Allstars 430. Jerk Off Jamboree

431. Pissfuck 432. Dick Weed And The Awful Orifices 433. The Punters

434. The Pedos 435. Scumfuck 436. Scumfucker

437. The Bastard Brigade 438. Shorty Waffles 439. Get Fucked

440. Get Fucked 441. Screw You 442. Furious Finger Fucking

443. Pungent Pussy 444. Repugnant Penis 445. Wad Blower

446. Johnny Wad Rides Again 447. Hung Like Hell 448. Monster Cock

449. General Genitorture 450. Compound Of Cunt 451. Sexorrist

452. Maxi Pad And The Heavy Flow 453. Ponder This Shit

454. Sweaty Slit 455. United States Of Anal 456. Fuck The World

457. So Fucking What (SFW) 458. Pussy Popping Priests

459. Slamming Ass 460. Bumping Uglies 461. The Beast With 2 Backs

462. Colostomy Bag Copulation 463. Dick Docking Dilemma

464. Anal Orgies 465. Sir Fuck-A-Lot 466. Grab Ass Gangsters

467. The Stench Of Sex 468. Sex On A Slip’n Slide

469. Just The Tip 470. Gobs Of Gash 471. The Mad Twatter

472. Snatchology 473. Fuckology. 474. Fuck 101 475. Facefucked Fools

478. Lusting Lucifer 479. Long Dong Silver Away 480. Wonderfuck

481. Gash Basher 482. Pounding Pussy 483. Fugly 484. Sexual Sadist

485. John Wayne Gacy Is Gay 486. Porn Shop Prostitutes

485. Johnny Wad Was Right 486. Addicted To Dick 487. Scrotal Tuck

488. Labia Loving Lesbians 489. Sex Toy Slaughter 490. Mung Mouth

491. Colonics Make Me Horny 492. Who Gives A Flying Fuck

493. Dildos Of The Dammned 494. Kick In The Crotch

495.A Forest Of Morning Wood

496. Spanking Monkeys And Choking Chickens 497. The Bearded Clam

498. The Cock Ring King 499. Pussy Full Of Puss

500. Friends Of A Sex Fiend

It Is What It Is,

By Les Sober

Yandere Chainsaw Regurgitation “The Price Of Ecstasy Is Pain”

Welcome to Today’s FYB Post featuring the Song “The Price Of Ecstasy Is Pain” by Yonder Chainsaw Regurgitation Factory. Now this is One of Those Posts where due to the fact YCRF is in an Extreme Music Niche there isn’t much Information Out there on Them. YCRF is part of a Sub Genre of Grindcore Known as Animegrind so Information is Scarce. For those Who may be Unaware of the Genre here is a Brief Synopsis of Animegrind. Common Animegrind Themes are a Preoccupation with Pitch-Shifted or Extreme Low Guttural Vocals, Murder, Gore Galore, Intense Violence, Mutilation, Anime/Anime Themed Art, Death, Bodily Fluids, Sexual Fetishes, Hentai inspired Lyrics, Destruction, Forensic Pathology, and Blisteringly Fast Tempos. While Other Grindcore Sub Genre like Goregrind or Pornogrind utilize Grotesque, Nauseating, Sexually Violent, Gore Driven, and Often Misogynistic illistrations Animegrind utilizes Various Variants of Disemboweled Anime School Girls (like Those see in Pro Guro or Erotic Gore Mangas, and Japanese Hentai Films often Combine Sex and Violence are used as a Backdrop). With that Said here is All the Information on YCRF that We were able to Scrap Together from Our Notes.

Yandere Chainsaw Regurgitation Factory:

Real Name Andrew Gonzales
YCRF is a One Man Project like Putrid Pile for Example (We have a Putrid Pile in Concert in Our Obscene Extreme Post in Our Music Section).
Based in Tehachapi, Kern County, California.
Years Active 2001-Present
Label: Impaled Ximena Records
Themes: Sadism, Gore, Extreme Violence, Sick Humor, and Anime.
Musical Aspects: Brutally Guttural Vocals, Explosive Down Tuned Riffs, and Anime Themes.
Though YCRF is in Fact a Animegrind Act but YCRF has also been mistaken for Death Metal, Brutal Death Metal, and Slamming Brutal Death Metal.
YCRF define Themselves Specifically as a “Weeb Slamming Animegrind”
Weeb is a Slang Term used to refer to Someone who is Obsessed with Japanese Culture, Particularly Anime and Manga. Weeb is a Term used in a Mocking or Derogatory manner.

It is What it IS,

Presented By Les Sober

Carmen’s Banana Cooking Episode #41

Welcome to Today’s FYB Post featuring CARMEN’S BANANA COOKING EPISODE #41. Carmen’s Banana Cooking Show Aired on Austin Community Television (Public Access) on Channel 10 on Fridays at 10pm from 1984 until 1992. Carmen would Cook Up Banana Dishes, Showcase Local Talent, and Go on Countless 80’s Austin Adventures. The Show’s Viewing Audience was Comprised of Actual Real Fans as well as Those Who were Fans of the Surreal Absurd fucking Freak Show Factor. The Show was Recently Rescued and Restored Carmen’s Banana Cooking is Streaming for Free On Youtube, and it has an Official Website. Also an Interesting Fact is Every Single Episode of Carmen’s Banana Cooking Show was Produced by Steven David Video.

The Host is a Ugly motherfucker in Wannabe Chiquita Banana Drag with Prosthetics (But remember They weren’t like the Prosthetics used in TV and Film Today. Take for Example Carmen’s Massive Quadruple DD Tits that were made from fucking Paper Mache for fucks sake), and the Finest fucking Dollar Store Wig Available. Carmen is Also Adorned with some Seriously fucking Tacky Banana Gimmick that looks like Some shit You’d buy for a fucking Halloween Costume. As for Carmen’s Make Up it Looks like a Piece of fucking Trailer Park Dwelling Piece of White Trash hooked up with a fucking Las Vegas Meth Addicted $2 Hooker and had a fucking Kid. Also We must fucking Warn You that at the Beginning Carmen Sings some Old Ass Love Song and Sings it HORRIBLY that it makes American Idol Rejects look Talented.

Episode Synopsis: First and Foremost the Show has Insanely Shitty Production Value and is EXTREMELY fucking Low Quality as it fucking gets. As We just Mentioned Above the Show Starts with Carmen Murdering the fuck Out of some Back in the Day Love Song. Then Carmen’s Big Sister Karma Stops by for some Utterly Unknown Reason. Karma then Dumps a Basket of what fucking else Bananas and Proceeds to Read Them like Some Sort of Shaman Mystic Medicine Man. Now it’s Not exactly Clear but it Seems that the Banana Basket Bullshit was to Confirm the Winner of the 1988 Election or at Least that’s what the Two Started Babbling About Almost Incoherently.

Our Favorite Line is when Carmen tells Her Sister as Her Sister is Leaving “We’ll Twist Up a few Banana Peels” Not too fucking Subtle Smoke Weed Much? FYI We Smoke Weed so We’re Not talking some Straight Edge Happy Horseshit. The Episode Ends by Transitioning from the Show’s Set to Some Asshole in Bed with Leopard Themed Pillows, Sheets, and Shit Wearing a Cheap Latex Mask (The Kind Used in the Human Doll Fetish). Now whoever the fuck it is or Supposed to be Doesn’t say a single fucking Word and Body Language is as if the Camera Man just Walked into Their Bedroom and Surprised Them so Their Acting all Shyly Taken Aback.

It is What it Is,

Presented By Les Sober

WTF Am I Watching: My Sister

Well another Wednesday is upon us and today’s post MY SISTER is a true fucking internet oddity unto itself. There was NO INFORMATION provided so without a fucking crumb of context MY SISTER just kept getting fucking odder by the minute. To put it simply I was not even anywhere close to fucking prepared to research this shit.

I hit up the usual platforms like Youtube (including the fucking comment section) and Reddit but I found jack diddly shit. So I went a little farther and checked 4Chan which was big for me because I personally fucking think 4 Chan is a fucking cyber shithole. Anyway the 4Chan sacrifice I made turned up dick.

WHERE DID THIS FUCKING VIDEO COME FROM, WHO MADE IT, AND WHY THE FUCK DID THEY?

The first fact I found was basic as fuck and was MY SISTER was uploaded in May 2011 on an Old Youtube Channel called Raider Dawg. The fucked up thing is MY SISTER stuck out like a sore fucking thumb because all the other content on Raider Dawg was purely either gamer shit or straight up trolling shit. To sum it up outside of MY SISTER Raider Dawg’s content was just a bunch of fucking immature fucking punk ass bullshit.

Bottomline here is shit didn’t add up.

Well it turned out that Raider Dawg wasn’t the channel’s original name was DeeznutsFYC until the name switch sometime in 2014. Since Raider Dawg apparently appeared to be a gaming enthusiast who wasn’t above fucking trolling someone told me to check something called LurkerFAQS. If you don’t know (and I didn’t either until this fucking post) is a ongoing continuous archive of posts from the GameFAQS message board.

So I started doing my own math and since the MY SISTER was originally posted in 2011 it made sense to me to search around using Raider Dawg’s old name DeeznutsFYC. What I found was that DeeznutsFYC posted 3 separate posts over the course of a year (2011-2012) about MY SISTER. I also noticed that he bumped the MY SISTER video several times which essentially means the old shit gets reposted at the top on the list. As you can imagine DeeznutsFYC was ask REPEATEDLY NUMEROUS TIMES about the Video and responded like a real fucking douchbag about it divulging nothing at all about the video.

The trail ended there so it was time to ask the usual questions like:

Is this a prank?
Is it a performance art piece?
Is it the work of a mentally disturbed individual?
Is this a gorilla promotion for a video game or movie?
Is this a promotional video since there is a fetish where people like to dress up like dolls and use high end silicone masks (since this fetish mainly applies to men who assume female form when “all dolled up”)?

Honestly this time around I don’t think any of those apply. The one hypothesis that I think honestly the most logical I have heard is that DeeznutsFYC/Raider Dawg created it, but it didn’t get the attention he wanted. So he resorted to posting the video several times while periodically bumping it to gain exposure by keeping it relevant to some fucking degree. Just like with his Youtube gaming channel the video MY SISTER posted on a gaming message board seems completely fucking out of place.

Now considering Deeznuts/Raider Dawg is obviously a gamer it sort of makes sense in the oddest fucking way that a gamer who created a video to freak people out (and failed to do so) on Youtube would post his creation on gaming message boards. This would not only serve to generate attention for MY SISTER, but it served as a way to get people from the gaming message boards to check out his gaming channel.

Anyway you fucking slice it this unsettlingly unnatural video is a fucking classic insane oddity, and who’s origins/creator/purpose will remain a fucking mystery from now until the fucking end of time.

See you when I see you,

Justine Sane

Fetishes For People Other Than Cannibals

A short while ago FYB posted a post pertaining to different kind of cannibalism, and we received plenty of e-mails that noted that (especially the end of the list) fell into a sexually fetishized form(s)/kind(s) cannibalism. Now to say that we were unaware of this would be a bold faced fucking lie because we damn well did.

A prime example of this is Vorarephilia which is an abnormal sexual condition characterized by the tendency to become sexually aroused by the idea of eating someone, the idea of being eaten by someone, or by witnessing a cannibalistic act (people with this particular paraphilia are commonly referred to as votes.

A lot of the e-mails were ,for lack of a better word shocked, to learn of how crazy shit got when we delved into the almost unbelievable underbelly of various types of cannibalism. This led people to wonder what other strange fetish shit was out there that they may very well be unaware of. This got us in turn to contemplate the same question so we did some investigating and compiled the following list of sexual fetishes (that with only an exception of one or perhaps two) we had no fucking idea even existed. All we can say in summation of our investigation into lesser known/popular/rarer fetishes we just couldn’t help thinking how insane the human brain actually is even without in this cases the presence of a mental condition, disorder, or syndrome.

The Fetish List:

Breath Play: Breath Play involves the restriction of oxygen to the brain to achieve to heightened orgasm. Self-induced breath play during masturbation is known as autoerotic asphyxiation. Breath play within a couple can be achieved by nose pinching, holding your breath, covering the face with hood or plastic bag, “corseting” (pushing down on someones chest, choking, hanging, “Kininging”/ “Queening” (smothering your partner with your genitals. Any time you restrict someone’s ability to breathe, you’re engaging in high risk behavior, so breath play within the realm of BDSM behaviors known as “edge play”, in which your partner is actively responsible for your life.
Hybristophilia: Hybristophilia is an abnormal sexual condition in which sexual desire and climax occur in response to the knowledge that one’s partner has committed a heinous act such as infidelity, lying, or criminal act such as rape, murder, or robbery.
Diaper Bondage: Diaper bondage is a specific for of submission that involves role-play in which an adult regresses to an infant-like state. Often, the adult preforming this sexual fetish will wear a diaper and act like a baby, seeking nurturing from their sexual partner. This condition is also known as paraphilia infantilism, autonepiophilia, psychosexual infantilism or, more commonly, adult baby syndrome.

Sexsomnia (Sleeping Sex): Sexsomnia is a rare disorder that prompts an individual to seek sexual activity in their sleep. Although most reported cases involve men, both male and females may initiate sleep sex. Most people have some awareness of this fetish since the invention of prescription sleeping pills. Ambien alone has a reputation for causing strange nocturnal behavior (Sleep sex, walking, driving, eating etc.)
Cuckolding/Cuckoldry: Cuckholding or cuckoldry is a sexual fetish in which someone experiences sexual arousal by the way of observing their partner having sex with another man or woman. Some report an associated feeling of humiliation and/or rejection as part of the allure.
Omarashi: Omarahi, or “omo” for short, falls within the urolagnia family of sexual fetishes which are related to urine. Those who identify as ooo become aroused when they have a full bladder and wet themselves, or observe their partner wetting themselves. Other phrases used to describe this particular fetish are :bladder desperation” and “panty wetting.” The word omarashi is Japanese for “to wet oneself.” This is not to be confused with Golden Showers.

Spanking Art: Spanking art is generally enjoyed by people who identify as spanking enthusiasts in the bedroom. Spankophilia is a paraphilia characterized by arousal from spanking or being spanked. It falls within the realm of BDSM (bondgae, discipline, submission, sadomasochism) behaviors, although it’s a sexual fetish in and of itself.
Somnophilia: Somnophilia is erotic arousal dependent upon the act of intruding on a stranger mid-sleep, or walking someone up with an erotic caresses.
My Little Pony Sex: The adult male fans of “My Little Pony” are colloquially known as “boonies” (these are NOT fuzzies, but are considered a specific subset of the Fuzzy Fetish. While not all bronies associate this cartoon program created for children with sex, there is a niche community of people who fetishize “My Little Pony” and watch porn related to these series/ role-play scenes based on the show.
Teratophilia: Teratophilia is a sexual fetish that involves being attracted to people physical deformities. There are many subjects of teratophilia specific to different types of human deformities. For instance, acrotomophilia involves sexual attraction to amputees and stigmatophilia refers to deriving sexual pleasure from people whose bodies are marked or scarred in some way.

Coprophilia/ Scatophilia: Coprophilia/Scatophilia (also know as “scat sex”) is a sexual fetish rooted in a fixation with feces and defecation. People who gravitate towards pop play expierance sexual pleasure through the act of defecating on another person or being defecated on for instance. This is not to be confused with Copraphasia which is the act of eating one owns feces.
Daddy Kink (Day Dom): Daddy kink is a relatively simple sexual fetish that involves submission/domination play during which the submissive refers to her dominate partner as “daddy.”
Pee Fetish: You’ve more than likely heard of a “golden shower” (the act of urinating on someone for the purpose of sexual pleasure) and the people who like giving or receiving golden showers are characterized as having a pee fetish. The clinic term for this is paraphilia is “urolagnia”.
Cum Fetish: People who identify as having a cum fetish are aroused by the act of cumming on their partner, being cummed on, and/or images of people who have been ejaculated on. Sometimes its about the sticky mess of ejaculate on someone’s face, stomach, chest, or ass is tantalizing to those with a cum fetish. The most promenade form of the cum fetish is known in the world of pornography as Bukkake.

Mechanophilia: Mechanophilia is characterized by sexual attraction to machines, sometimes a desire to engage in sexual relations with (or in) an airplane, car, bicycle, Bus, Motorcycle, or Helicopter.
Macrophilia/ Giantess Sex: Macrophilia or giantess sex is an abnormal sexual condition that involves being attracted to and aroused by someone who is much larger than you are physically. In short, it’s a phenomenon in which people are turned on by giants and fantasies involving giants.
Pedal Pumping/ Revving: Pedal Pumping or “revving” is a subset of foot fetishism that involves watching someone, often a woman wearing high heels, push a gas pedal with masturbatory rhythm.
Balloon Fetish/ Looners: People with a balloon fetish (aka “looters”) find balloons sexual attractive and incorporate them into their sex lives. While some find creative ways to have sex with balloons, other simply enjoy the sight of their partner sitting on a balloon and popping it.
Quorofilia/ Hand Fetish: Some people who experience a hand fetish or quorofilia are attracted to a specific part of the hand, such as the fingers (which might appear phallic), the nails, or the palm. Others are aroused by actions preformed with the hand, whether overtly sexual (i.e. masturbation) or traditionally asexual (i.e. hand washing or rinsing dishes).

Sensation Play: While many forms of erotic play and fundamentally cerebral and centered on power exchanges (think domination/submission), sensation play is physical eroticism. In sensation play, the physical stimuli (i.e. silk scarves, ice, candle wax, massage oil, feathers etc.) are applied in a controlled manner with the purpose of eliciting the release of pleasure triggering endorphins. While their may be pain involved, the effect is similar to that of a “runner’s high.”
Extreme Feeding/ Feederism: Feeders or “encouragers” take pleasure in funneling excessive quantities of food into the mouths of “gainers”. Some extreme feeders enjoy the sensation of inserting their penis between a gainer’s fat folds.
Pygophilia: Sexual attraction or arousal to the human butt.
Hematolagnia: Hematolagnia is also known as “vampire syndrome”, hematolagnia is sexual interest in blood or desire to drink blood sensually.
Salirophilia: Is the love of getting dirty (or getting your partner dirty) literally, prior or during sexual intercourse.

Katoptronophilia: Is the intense sexual satisfaction derived from mirrors, often satisfied by having sex, stripping, or masturbating in front of mirrors.
Food Fetish: While some foods are actually aphrodisiacs because they have properties that induce sexual desire, sexual food play can involve any food that a person finds sexually stimulating. Food play is a form of sitophilia which refers to arousal by erotic scenes centering food.
Teleiophilia: Sexual attraction to adults? WE HAVE NO IDEA WTF THIS MEANS because if you’re not a pedophile then Yes you’d be an adult attracted to other adults. We couldn’t find any further useful information on this fetish so if you can/do please shoot us an e-mail at fyourblog404@gmail.com Thanks.
Microphilia: Is a sexual attraction to small people (the politically correct term(s) for DWARFS/MIDGETS) or someone of a short stature such as a Horse Jockey as well as other tiny things. Basically if someone has a micropenis then a Microphiliac is just what your looking for.
Claustrophilia: Those who have claustrophilia are people that are turned on by/ prefer to have sex in tiny or confined spaces (i.e. a Coffin).

Agalmatophilia: Is the love/sexual attraction to mannequins or statues.
Hotdogging: Is a sexual fetish that involves someone rubbing their penis between another person’s butt cheeks. (This is NOT about anal penetration, though it can lead it it).
Tricophilia: The Sexual Arousal from Hair (primarily human).
Abasiophilia: The sexual attraction to people with leg braces.
Spectrophilia: The sexual attraction (or arousal) to Ghosts.
Phalloorchoalgolagnia: Sexual arousal from pain to the male genitalia (this means anything from being kicked in the balls to cock and ball torture).
Plushophilia: The sexual attraction to stuffed animals or people in animal costumes (THESE ARE THE FUZZIES).
Emetophilia: The sexual attraction to (or arousal) to vomit.

Frotteurism: The sexual arousal from rubbing against non-consenting people. This in FYB’s opinion is creepy and borderline illegal.
Eproctophilia: The sexual arousal or attraction to farts.
Homeovestism: Is the attraction to the clothing of one’s own gender (i.e. for males it could be a Woman wearing a man’s shirt).
Dacryphilia: The sexual attraction to making someone cry.
Nasophilia: The sexual arousal or attraction to noses.
Arachnophilia: The sexual arousal or attraction to spiders also known as “spider lovers”

Now if this Post peeked your Curiosity then we suggest you head over to BDSMTEST.ORG and take the test and see what floats your boat, and who knows you might just surprise yourself.

I’ll see you on the other side,

Otto Rageous

Introduction to Cannibalism 101: The Different Kinds of Cannibalism

Greeting and welcome to Introduction to Cannibalism 101: The Different Kinds of Cannibalism with Otto Rageous .

The practice of cannibalism has existed since the very dawn of humanity. From the Beginning from Cavemen through out the entire history of man al the way up to modern day. This is not a general lesson in/on cannibalism, it’s a specific lesson on the various kinds of cannibalism/cannibals that exist. Cannibalism is considered by a majority of Societies around the world as the most extreme Taboo a person could engage in. It’s ironic that humanity eats countless species of animals for sustenance, but when it comes to people eating other people its unacceptable, demonized, condemned, and made illegal. There’s a strange double standard surrounding the practice(s) of cannibalism since mankind is the only animal on the entire earth that kills one another for anything other than food. Thus the unofficial rule that came to be is murdering someone is extremely bad, yet eating someone is still far worse.

Cannibalism:(noun) The practice of eating the flesh of your own species/Kind.

Etymology: The word “cannibalism” is derived from cannibles, the Spanish name for Caribs, a West Indies tribe that may have been practicing cannibals, from the Spanish canibal or caribou “A savage”. The term Anthropology, meaning “eating humans” is also used for human cannibalism.

Historical Quote On the topic of cannibals/cannibalism:

“The people round here are all cannibals. You never saw such a weird looking lot in your life. There are also dwarfs (called Batwas) in the forest who are even worse cannibals than the taller human environment. They eat man flesh raw! It’s a fact.” Casement then added how assailants would “bring down a dwarf on the way home, for the marital cooking pot … The Dwarfs, as I say, dispense with cooking pots and eat and drink their human prey fresh cut on the battlefield while the blood is still warm and running. These are not fairy tales, my dear Cowper, but actual gruesome reality in the heart of this poor, benighted savage land.”

-Roger Casement (In a Letter to a Colleague on August 3, 1903)

Categories of Cannibalsim:

Ritualistic
Survival
Sacrifical
Necro/ Mortuary
Autocannibalism/ Sexual Autocannibalism
Sexual
Filial
Erotophonophilia
Vorarephilia
Gynophagia
Perthenophasia (sub type)
Sexual Autophagy
Symbolic
Pathological (also known as Erotophonophilia)
Exocannibalism
Endocannibalism

Category Definitions:

Ritualistic Cannibalism: In acts of ritual or customary cannibalism, specified members of a society consume all or part of a certain body parts, which are believed to contain and convey attributes of the deceased.

Survival Cannibalism: Survival cannibalism is innate in humans; people will resort to eating a fellow human being under dire circumstances.

Sacrificial Cannibalism: In dire circumstances a group of people may implement a system one of the most common is drawing straws. Members of a group draw “straws” to see which member of the group will subsequently be killed and eaten. As a willing participant each member of the group is in agreement if they are the one with the shortest straw that they will sacrifice themselves for the betterment of the group. It’s important to note that this grim system of selection is a voluntarily decision made by every member of the group unlike with Survival cannibalism.

Necro/ Post-Mortuary Cannibalism: The consumption of part or all of a corpse by members of its own kind. This is not limited to flesh alone as it includes the consumption of internal organs as well.

Auntocannibalism: Self-cannibalism or the practice of eating oneself. This also includes things like eating ones finger nails or a mother eating the placenta after giving birth.

Sexual Cannibalism: Is usually considered a psychosexual disorder and involves individuals’ sexualizing the consumption of another human being’s Flesh.

Erotophonophilia (type of Sexual Cannibalism): Often referred to as “lust murder” , a sexual paraphilia in which individuals have extreme violent fantasies and typically kill their victim during sex and/or mutilate their victim’s sexual organs. In some cases, the erotophonophiles will eat some of their victim’s body parts (usually post-mortem).

Vorarephilia (type of Sexual Cannibalism): This type of sexual cannibalism has been increasingly documented in the scientific literature over the last decade. This is a sexual paraphilia in which individuals are sexually aroused by 1. the idea of being eaten 2. eating another person, and/or 3. observing this process for sexual gratification. However, most vorarephiles’ behavior is fantasy based, although there have been real life cases such as Armin Meiwes, the so-called ‘Rotenburg Cannibal’.

Gynophagia (Sexually Cannibalistic Behavior): A sexual fetish that involves fantasies of cooking and consumption of human females (gynophagia literally means ‘woman eating’).

Parthenophagia (Sub Type of Gynophagia): This is the practice of eating young girls or virgins. Several lust murderers were also know to consume the flesh of young virgins, most notably serial Killer, pedophile, and sexual sadist Albert Fish.

Sexual Autophagy (type of Sexual Cannibalism): Refers to the eating of one’s own flesh for sexual pleasure.

Filial Cannibalism: Occurs when an adult individual of a species consumes all or part of the young of its own species or immediate offspring. This is primarily applied to the animal kingdom but the fact remains there is no age limit on human victims of Cannibalism. There are plenty of documented cases of human cannibalism involving adults eating children and babies (in addition to eating adults) from around the globe.

Symbolic Cannibalism: One that resides in the abstract, spiritual realm where no actual flesh is consumed. An example of this is Christian Mass.

Pathological Cannibalism: A pathological urge to devour human flesh, occasionally observed in severe schizophrenics and similar metal disorders. In psychoanalytic theory, cannibalistic impulses are associated with the fixation at the oral-biting phase of psychosexual development. This category includes several Serial Killers such as:
Albert Fish ( The Grey Man”)
Ed Gein (The fictional characters Leatherface from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Buffalo Bill from the Movie Silence of the Lambs, and Norman Bates from Alford Hitchcock’s Psycho were all inspired by Ed Gein and his crimes.)
Jeffery Dahmer (“The Milwaukee Cannibal”)
Rudy Eugene “The Miami Cannibal”
Andrei Chikatilo “The Ukrainian Monster”
“The Crossbow Cannibal” Stephen Griffiths,
Luka Magnotta (The Canadian Cannibal. Most known as the subject of the popular Netflix documentary Don’t Fuck With Cats).

Endocannibalism (Learned Cannibalistic Behavior): Community of like minded people consume a member of their group pre or post mortem.

Exocannibalism (Learned Cannibalistic Behavior): The consuming of flesh of someone from outside of the group. Usually as a celebration of victory over an opposing enemy.

Thus ends our education on eating human flesh for now, and keep an eye out for future Cannibalism posts as there will be more and varied. The lesson here is from survival to serial killers cannibalism is more prevalent in the world than you’d dare to think.

That’s all Until our paths cross again

By Otto Rageous

Lee Jonitis: Professional People Watcher (27/365)

The Performer Guy held the Christ like Pose for a few seconds before breaking into a full blown Gregorian Chant. Lee found it admirable that the Performer knew Latin since who the fuck spoke Latin as it had already been declared a Dead Language?! Once the Performer was finished singing He placed the Hammer down laying along the 2 by 4 with a Bizarre Ritualistic sense of Reverence.

Next the Guy retrieved an Old Beaten Up Bible, and a Rickety Music Stand from behind the wings. He opened the Bible to a Pre Marked Page, and started to Read the part of the Bible about The Last Supper in a Booming (almost Sing Song like) Baritone. Just as Lee was entertaining the idea of a second Bathroom break things started to pick up.

The Preformer started to speak Faster, and Faster like an Auctioneer on Crack Bender as His words began to Blur together Indecipherably. As He was reading at this point the Performer reached down and extended the bottom part of His Foreskin. He then held the section of His Foreskin in place using the insanely sharp looking Tip of the Massive Looking Nail.

Suddenly the Performer screamed out “THE BODY OF CHRIST!!!” like His fucking Life depended on it. This Snapped the Meager Audience back to Reality. As soon as He finished the word Christ the Performer picked up the 5 pound Hand Held Sledgehammer in His right Hand, Raised it High over His head, and then He brought it down (with all the might He could Muster) onto the Head of the Nail in one swift Blow. The Hammer struck the Nail with the loud Metallic Twang of Metal meeting Metal head on. The Nail Plunged almost all the way through the fucking 2 by 4 .

It was then that 3 of the 11 Audience Members present got up and left looking repulsed and pissed at the same time. Lee figured this Performance was like the others designed as an over the top Circus of Shock and Awe. And Lee would be damned if He was going to be the so called first on to flinch. This was an Abrasive Performance Art Showdown, and Lee was about to fucking loose.

The Performer returned to Reading about the Last Super from the Old Beaten Up Bible. This time His speech sped up much faster than the last time around, and Lee figured thats the way it is when you just impaled your Penis in front of a fucking Live Audience. As the Performer was building up Steam a Stage Hand in a Slayer T-shirt not so subtly snuck out and handed the Performer a Regular Standard Household Hammer.

This time the Performer Screamed Out “THE BLOOD OF CHRIST!” before taking the Claw of the New Hammer, and Violently Pried the Nail out of the Board and His Foreskin. As soon as the Nail exited His Flesh a fucking torrent of blood came gushing forth like somehow His dick had been transformed into a fucking Fire Hose it was truly unreal.

The Performer jumped back from the 2 by 4, and took His fucked up Foreskin and tried to pull it over the head of His cock. This looked to Lee like a strange attempt to stop the Profuse Amount Bleeding by turning His cock into an impromptu Water Ballon of sorts. Maybe the first thing the Performer (being uncircumcised) though of when looked down at His Bloody Bellend the first thing that popped into His head was Sausage. And thusly He was trying to use His Foreskin to create a kind of Casing if You will. Aside from the Odd Reasoning behind the Weiner wrapping idea it also was failing to work as copious amounts of Blood was being Splattered all over the fucking Stage at this point.

Stay Tuned Kiddies for the Next Stellar Installment of………

LEE JONITIS: PROFESSIONAL PEOPLE WATCHER (28/365)

Thanks for Reading,

By Les Sober

Lee Jonitis: Professional People Watcher (24/365)

Lee entered the Small Lobby and looked around as His eyes adjusted to the Dim Light. Everything was painted Black The Walls, Door, Ceiling, and Concession Stand which made it all that more difficult to see anything at first. The Concession Stand was defunct with an Outdated Popcorn Maker, A Soda Dispenser that was coated in cobwebs, and an entirely empty Display Case. Lee couldn’t figure out why the Theater Owners weren’t selling Candy and Soda since that shit boosted the Bottom Line when it came to profits.

Lee walked up a flight of stairs into the Tiny Theater which had max seating of 50 people at most. The Chairs were simply the run of the Mill folding Metal Chairs in rows sending a homemade Riser. Again every fucking thing was painted Jet Black. There was a handful of onlookers in the Audience that topped out at 11 people including Lee sitting motionless as if They were Tibetan Monks Meditating. Lee found the unyielding Silence to be rather unnerving since it reminded Him of a fucking Funeral Home.

Then at last the lights dimmed down, a Gentlemen who looked like a Long Haul Trucker fresh off the road appeared from god knows where and stood unenthusiastically next to the sole Spot Light (there wasn’t another sort of Stage Lighting to be found). After a brief pause The Curtin crept open and the Spot Light jumped into action.

The First Act was called “Pregnant with Myself: The Inner Child Defined”. The Act consisted of a Young Female Contortionist preforming a 3 stage Interpretive Dance. The First Stage was Her inpregnationg Herself by having Sex (Not Masturbation) with Herself followed by Her being Pregnant with Herself. The last Stage, Stage 3 was Her giving Birth to Her fully Grown Self with an exorbitant amount of Fake Blood.

The Contortionist was followed by a Young Man that appeared to be in His late Twenties in Jeans and plain blue t-shirt who walked very deliberately onto the stage, set down an empty 25 Gallon Plastic Bucket, then dropped His pants, Sat Down on said Bucket, and then spent the next 57 minutes taking a shit in it while playing Candy Crush on His Cell Phone. It was then that Lee realized WHY the Theater didn’t sell anything Edible.

The 3rd Act was a Pair of Fuzzies who came out one dressed as a Bright Pink Unicorn and the Other was Dressed as a Tyrannosaurus Rex . They then proceeded to play a few Children’s Games like Leap Frog and a 2 person game of Duck, Duck, Goose before Standing side by Side. Once the Fuzzies were standing next to one another shoulder to shoulder They undid the Velcro that covered Their crotches exposing the Unicorns erect cock and the T-Rex’s freshly shaven Vagina. The Two the engaged in Mutual Masturbation until Both Climaxed and fell over. Lee pitied the Janitor who had to clean that shit up before the Next At took the Stage.

Stay Tuned for the Next Fun Filled Installment of………

LEE JONITIS: PROFESSIONAL PEOPLE WATCHER (25/365)

Thanks for Reading,

By Les Sober

Text Poetry That No One Should Read

WARNING DEAR READER:

Even though We here at f-yourblog.com have an open letter statement posted that has a section pertaining to content. The Following Post is the reason We have said section. THIS IS THE MOST OFFENSIVE and OBSCENE Post to date. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.

In the past I have posted a couple of SpaceDog’s and my Late Night Text Conversations. I was recently on a road trip that had me headed into SpaceDog’s neck f the Woods. So I texted Him a short 4 line limerick that then gave birth to an entire poem written on spontaneously on the spot while stuck in a real bumper fucker of a traffic jam. A few minutes later SpaceDog hit me back with a Nasty bit of Poetry of His own also pertaining to the same person. See one of the things SpaceDog and I have in common are a bunch of people we both Hate and Despise to NO END WHATSOEVER. To handle this deep disgust We mock these people viciously in an arena where NOTHING IS OFF LIMITS EVER.

Here is My Poem I sent SpaceDog:

THE BAD ASS BALLAD OF BRITTANY:

People laugh and people scoff,

But Brittany cut her pussy off,

She’d have Wild Fetish fits,

While Strange Men shit on her Tits,

She used so much lube She bought Stock,

While sucking on an Old Man’s Cock,

She’d fuck you till you bounced off the Walls,

She’d Swallow, Eat Ass, and Gargle Balls,

When She heard of Bukaki,

She said “thats for ME!”,

She always had problems with her legging,

When some Dude’s Ass She was Furiously Pegging,

No Secret Brittany Licked some Slit,

Nibbled on Crackhead Clit,

She Shot Heroin that was Top Notch,

She injected into her stank Crotch,

Filled with Pervert’s Jizz,

She Loves The Biz,

Now She has Lost All Hope,

She’s Sucking Dick for Dope,

Made Her money on her Back,

Spent it all Smoking Crack,

Her Vag is riddled with STDs of Every Kind,

She’s Drinking Mad Dog 20/20 to unwind,

She’s Pregnant again and She Knows the Institution,

She’ll go back to The Free Clinic for her 100th Abortion,

She’s a 3 Hole Super Slut,

Mouth, Vag, and The Butt,

She sits on the corner smoking a PCP Laced Blunt,

While Passerby’s on the Street gag at the smell of Her Cunt,

It looked like a sloppy Hot Roast Beef between Her legs,

As Her Live In Gimp Grovels, Moans, and Begs,

She can Cream Pie like no other,

She once even fucked Her own Mother,

Started a Porno Web Cam,

Where She’d eat Her Sister’s Clam,

She’ll fuck every last one of the 42 of us,

As Long You don’t mind Her Pussy Puss,

Her Scab covered Genitalia,

Just the Smell Could Kill Ya,

She’d let you Tittie fuck Her for just a Dollar,

You could finish on her face and its No Bother,

She would go insane if you wanted to run a train,

Just as Her Baby was Aborted so was Her Feeble Brain,

Gang Bangs made Her Wet,

Bath Salt Abuse made Her Forget,

Molested by Her Step Brother,

Preformed Oral sex on her Mother,

A Homeless Alcoholic Hooker,

As a D-List Stripper No One would Book Her,

She loved taking Golden Showers,

She’d sell Her body at all hours,

She can really go to town taking on a Taint,

She does shit that makes Hardcore Porn Stars Faint,

She has to be to remain the Rim Job Queen,

She was a regular at The No Tell Motel,

In Her Own Ejaculation Soaked Hell,

She was a truly Bitter a real Bitch,

Who’s pounded out pussy tended to Itch,

Her Vaginal fuck Flaps hung down by Her dirt covered Knees,

A Vile of Crack would pop out of Her Ass when She would sneeze,

Track Marks under Her Muff,

Taking 56 cocks a day can be rough,

She would Masturbate in a Fury,

Behind the Dumpster in the Ally,

She’s fuck you for Food,

She’ll fuck a Girl, a Sheep, and a Dude,

She was a Donkey Show Star,

At the Sleaziest Bar,

So absolutely fucked up and utterly Dumb,

No wonder The Stupid Slut is coated in Cum,

She used to shoot Golf Balls out of Her Snatch,

And Golf Tee’s out Her Ass just to Match,

She’s Dirty, disease ridden Prostitute,

There is NO Dispute,,

She used to run through Police Barricades,

While Screaming “I have FULL BLOWN AIDS!”,

She constantly Battled the Clap,

Under a Bridge SHe’d take a Nap,

She was a Tramp among Tramps,

She’d take Cash, Drugs, or Food Stamps,

She just a low rent junkie,

a Drug Mule Flunky,

A rotten, scummy Hell of a Gutter Whore,

I hit the Road, I could stand Her NO MORE.

What? You were Warned So if your Offended in any way…..

For those Reader’s who are around I will be posting SpaceDog’s Reply Poem Tomorrow without Fail Friends.

Thanks For Reading,

Les Sober

Try Scamming Me & I’ll Royally Fuck Up Your Day PT. 2: Counterstrike

I left off explaining in the last post that some Absurd Asshole(s) had contacted via text about trouble processing my Health Insurance Payment that was a BLATANT SCAM. In stead of flipping out and going batshit crazy with rage/revenge I would try a different plan. Here is what I did.

I did some Bong Rips and began to think about a plan. Now not only did I want to piss the Scam Artist off as much as they had me I also wanted it to be fun to do. I ended up coming around full circle by selecting Text Messaging as my form of communication versus Cell Phone Call. If I had chose to call the number included in the Text I know what the fuck would have happened.

I would have simply lost my shit and started cursing out the guy on the other end of the phone. The swearing then would be followed by a slew of insults and then violent threats of bodily harm. I seem to have inherited my Father’s intense source of Anger. My motto in situations like this is if you try and fuck with me or fuck me over I will return the favor 100 fold, BUT I digress.

Then I concocted a phony Movie Company Called Von Dire Films. Now Von Dire I thought should be a scummy, underground, indie, sleazy, offensive, and troubling films with titles like “Corpse Farm: A Return to Flesh” or some weird shit like that. I then came to the conclusion that Von Dire Films was a Self Promotional Merchandise Super Sluts who TEX BOMB the Hell out of random people hoping to secure some new fans/customers.

Here are some examples of the Von Dire Film Solicitation Texts:

Text 1.

You have reached Von Dire Movie Production Company. Unfortunately We are having budgetary issues while shooting our new Movie in Borneo called “Skull Fucking Your Bloody Skull”. We will be out of the Country for Filming for the next 8 weeks. Please leave any and all contact information pertaining to the specified project at Our Dark Web Website VonDiresFuckedUpFilm.Org

So to Our Fans We say “Fuck Off We’re Filming” & “Adios Assholes” so Thank You for Your interest in Von Dire International Snuff Film Productions LLC.

Text 2.

Von Dire Banned Films That with Mindfuck you like a Lobotomy!!!

WWW.VDBF.ORG

SUPER SICK SALE ALL WEEK LONG!!!!!!!!

Text 3.

Von Dire Film “Cannibalistic Coitus” Nominated for the Underground Picture of the Year at Cannes!!! Now Only $29.99!!!

See Our Website on the Dark Web for further details!!!

STAY SICK CITIZENS!!!!!!

TEXT 4.

VON DIRE IS BACK! in the Celluloid Slaughter Business with his new demented movie “Meat Hook Justice” Coming to American Theaters Feb. 14th 2018! ADVANCE TICKETS Sales Available Through Our Dark Web Website. SO SIGN IN, SHOP, AND STAY SICK!

Text 5.

Von Dire’s Ferral Film Festival set for Bucharest Sept. 18th 2018!!!

Gorepon Group Packages Available on our DARKEST WEBSITE!

HURRY BEFORE THEY SELL OUT!!!!!

GOREPONS START AT 12,000 BitCoin (Purchaser must have a Valid

PayPal account at time of Purchase)

Text 6.

Gorepon the Groupon of Grizzly Gore has current Tour Packages of

Killing Christ’s Kingdom Studios

VERY LIMITED TIME ON ONLY!!! DON’T THINK BUY. BUY.BUY.

TEXT 7.

VON DIRE Sinful Spoken Wicked Word Tour COMING SOON!!

Check Out Our Deepest Dark WebSite for Upcoming Information!!!

Have Your check books ready!!!!

Text 8.

Von Dire Biography 4 Sale!!! “Bloody Genital Mutilation: My Life Growing Up in Antartica” ON SALE! LIMITED NUMBER PRINTED!

ORDER NOW,NOW,NOW!!! (Sale Price 165 Euros) !!!

All We need is Your Social Security Card Number for verification of Purchase!

Text 9.

Von Dire Films Presents Bloody Sod Bollock’s

“Shoot My Face Off I Like It” Disturbing Documentary of Damnation

For Sale For LOW, LOW PRICE of 900 Yen!!!

All We Need is Your Debit Card Number and Pin Number!!!

Text 10.

Von Dire’s New Gothic Novel

“The Insurance Sucubus Slayer: Cannibalize The Conman”

Available now on BrutalBooks.Net for $49.99

All We Need is the Routing Number from a Personal Check!!!

Text 11.

Von Dire is Von Damit in “Demonic Dolphin Rape Cave 2”

Streaming on FuktFilms.Net for just the low price of $4.99 for

the 1st Minute and $2.99 each Additional Minute!!!!!

Text 12. “Lust and Lobotomies: The Jeffery Dalhmer Story” by Von Dire

Inspired by Real Life Insanity!!

Torn from the Headlines of Horror!!!!

On Sale Now For Just 17 Easy Payments of $59.99!!!!

Text 12.

Von Dire’s work will Haunt you!!!!

Check Out at Goddamn VOnDire.Org!!!

Text. 13

Von Dire Fan Club Enrolling NOW!!!

Von Dire’s Fan Club The Bloody Bastards has LIMITED OPENINGS!!!

Rare chance to become an actual Fan Club Member just Sign Up For

12 Months for $6,499.99!!!

9 Months for $4,995.99!!!

6 Months for $3,499.99!!!

3 Months for $1,499.99!!!

1 Month for just a mere $999.99

All You need to do is just send ALL Your Personal Banking Information to Us Via Our Deep Dark Dark Website!!

Text 13.

“Suck My Ass It Smells” the Von Dire GG Allin Punkumentary Slated for Release in FALL 2019!!! ADVANCE TICKETS FOR SALE!!!! BUY NOW!!!!!

Text 14.

It has come to Our attention that you haven’t purchased anything in QUITE A WHILE!

Please contact Us IMMEDIATELY with Your Credit Card Information Ready!!!

VON DIRE FILMS LLC “The Sickest Shit on Celluloid!!!”

Text 15.

WHY haven’t YOU visited Our Deep Website VonDire.Org Website??????

Please Stop and SHOP! SHOP! SHOP!

Deals! Sales! Discounts!! DOUBLE Fan Club Member Points!!!!!

Text 16.

It has come to the attention of Our Billing Department that You have an Outstanding OVER DUE Payment Pending for $749,999.99.

If You FAIL to contact us within 24 hours We will turn Your Current Past Due Amount over to The United States Federal Debt Collection Agency.

It be in Your Best Interest to CALL US TODAY and PAY Without Thinking or Questioning it. You can also Log Onto Our Darkest Website and SPEND the Equivalent on Merchandise.

Text 17.

You’ve been CAUGHT by MasterLock Security Monitoring Systems on Illegal Von Dire DarkWeb Movie sites.

These Sites contained depictions of Extreme Fetishes, Donkey Shows, Eating Feces, Platypus Rape, S&M&B&D&GT, Pygmy Gangbangs, Live Sex Acts preformed by Sea Monkeys, Defamation of the Dead, Necrophilia, HillBilly Incest, Cattle Decapitation, Sex with Star Fishes, Genital Mutilation, Uniques, Rectal Insertion of Foreign Objects, Triple Fisting, Nipple Clamp Carnage, Group Masturbation, Coffin Coitus, Blood Lust Orgies, Vaginal Vomiting, Testicular Torture, Midgets Running a Train on a WNBA Center, Amputee Stump Humping, Skull Fucking, Ejaculating Blood, Among Other Offenses.

If You Do Not PAY the Fine of $15,499.99 to Us in Target Gift Cards OR Cigarettes WE WILL REPORT YOU TO THE NSA IMMEDIATELY POST HASTE!

Text 18.

Cunt-Fart & The Rotten Peckers have just signed a contract to record the entire Soundtrack for Von Dire’s Short Student Art Film

“Sadistic Sex Slug Sodomy”

Release due February 1st at MIDNIGHT through Our Super Sick Website!!!

Members get unlimited listening!!!

So Send Us a Photocopy of Your Driver’s License and a Blank Persona Check or Debit Card!!!!

ONLY $975.99 While Supplies Last BUY NOW WITHOUT DELAY!!!!!!

Shitting and Fondling Included for an Additional Fee of $64.99!!!

Text 19.

Visit VONDIREMERCH.ORG(Y).NET NOW!!!!HURRY!!! GO!!!!

Discount Sale Starts This Friday at Midnight on Our Sick As Shit Website TODAY!!!

BE THERE YOU BASTARDS & BITCHES!!!!!

Text 20.

Authentic Bulgarian Bahhbahchoubpa Available TODAY!!!!

Grown EXCLUSIVELY at Von Dire Feral Farms in the Sunless Lithuanian Country Side!!

JUST A MEASLY $49.99 a Bushel!!!!! LOGON TO OUR Sinful Website for Purchasing Information TODAY!!!!!

Text 21.

Von Dire Office Yard Sale is going on this Weekend!!!!

This is YOUR rare and utterly exclusive chance as a Fucked Up Fan Club Member to PURCHASE SPECIAL MERCHANDISE ITEMS SUCH AS:

A Mason Jar of Von Dire’s Shaved Pubes, VD’s PERSONAL ANTIQUE Genital Torture Kit, VD’s diseased and stuffed Pet Electric Eel, VD’s office Urinal, The German Industrial Nipple Clamps from VD’s Outfit he wore to the Vomitous Awards in 1993, AND SOOOOO MUCH MORE!!!! LOG ON NOW LEMMINGS!!!

Text 22.

Von Dire’s Scummy Spoken Word Collection “Decade of Debauchery” consists of the 1979-1991 Spoken Word Tours of Guam. ONLY $99.99! LOG ON AND BUY NOW and BUY A COPY FOR A FRIEND OR FAMILY MEMBER NOW!!

Text 23.

Von Dire’s Lost Movie has just been Found!!!!

“Cockring Carnival of Karnal Cock Carnage 1888”

One of Von Dire’s 1st Films found misplaced in the Lost Soul Studios’s Film Vault!!!! ONLY $179.99!

EXTREMELY LIMITED TIME ONLY!!! This is a one time 36 Hour Special Secret Sale!!! Buy Several Copies NOW!!!

Text 24.

Von Dire POP UP RESTAURANT The VD Clinic IS HERE Tonight!!!

Just a small fee of $299.99 Per Person and $499.99 Per Plate!!!!

Dinner Includes:

Specialty Corrosive Cocktails, 17 Course Dinner (with the Main Course Being Bison imported from the Croatia), Damnable Dessert, and Sinister Cigars served with 110 year old cognac from Turkey.

PLUS A SPECIAL SHOWING OF VD Video Productions Catalog BUT HURRY SALE ENDS IN 76 Minutes!!

Text 25.

BREAKING NEWS!!! THIS JUST IN!!!!

Von Dire Dick Pics Leaked on

HollywoodHardons.com!!!!!!

NOTE TO READER: The texts above were sent starting Monday 6:15 am and Wednesday 11:39am. That would have been the end of it, BUT on Wednesday at 2:47 pm The Absurd Assholes sent me yet ANOTHER TEXT. The text was the same deplete piece of shit cheap ass scam bullshit as the last previous 3. Thusly at 7:48 Wednesday I returned to my antagonistic ways.

Text 1.

“Throbbing Taints and the Shitty Assholes” a Film By the Legendary Deplorable Director VON DIRE is a Political Commentary Documentary on the current sate of political affairs throughout this Evil Earth. Von Dire has already announced He will be filming the sequel “TrumpFucker: A Legacy of Failure” solely focusing on Donald Trump.

ADVANCE COPIES AVAILABLE FOR 210 BITCOINS!! CHECK OUT OUR SICKLY WEBSITE!! SOONER THE BETTER, BUY NOW!!

TEXT 2.

“Crippled Faith” is a collection of Gothic Poems about Death and Desire by none other than VON DIRE’S Little Bastard Brother VAN DIRE!! The book was released by Putrid Publishing which is his Older Brother VON DIRE’s Publishing House known mostly for publishing “Necrophilia Noir” a instructional guide for beginner Necrophiliac.

AVAILABLE AT OUR WEBSITE!!!

All We Need is a photocopy of Your Personal Financial Statements such as Banking Statement, to Complete Your Purchase RIGHT FUCKING NOW BITCHES!!!

Text 3.

Von Dire’s band SlutFuck will be playing a limited number of secret acoustic Tour all during the month of March.

DON’T MISS SLUTFUCK’S “EATING THE ASS OUTTA A DEAD DINGO” TOUR

WHERE WILL THEY BE PLAYING YOU ASK???!!

Log On to Our Wretched WebSite where You and Your Friends can PURCHASE CLUES to help You to locate a Secret Show NEAR YOU!!

The Cost Per Clue is Only $29.99!!! ACT NOW, BUY NOW!!!!!!

Text 4.

Cocktails To The Tits: A Von Dire Meet & Greet scheduled before the debut of VD’s most recent Diseased Film “The Cyclops: Cycle of Shitty Sex, Unbearable Sin, and the Abominable Aftermath”

Saturday Midnight Showing down at The Barfly Lounge!!!

Meet & Greet Passes $349.99 and Film Tickets for ADDITIONAL $74.99!!

Call The BarFly Lounge For Details RIGHT FUCKING NOW BABY!!!

Text 5.

“Zombie Hooker Handjobs” a Sick Flick by One of the most despised film makers in MOVIE HISTORY Von Dire’s Eldest Son Vin Dire!! COMING SPRING 2019!!!

Text 6.

“The Scumfuck Tradition & Legendary Luridness”

Von Dire’s FAMOUS AWARD WINNING ROCKUMENTARY chronicles Iconic Underground Hardcore Porno Punk Bands Such as the Following:

The Fuck Me Pumps, SlutFucker ( a SlutFuck Tribute Band), Slore, The Shitty Shitty Gangbangers, Agent Alien Anal X, The Prolapsed Rectums, Anti-All, Puss Buster, Rectal Invasion, Muff Diver & The Bull Dykes, Fighters and Fuckers, The Les Sober Scumbag 6, The Gash, Up To The Nuts In Guts, The Young Cocksmen, Hairy Clam and The Beavers, Death To Dipshits, Fuck Your Face, Mr. Fister, Cunt-Fart, Mangled Manginas, Vag The Impaler, Manstruation, The Salty Yogurt Slingers, Molested Melvin, The Perv’s, Rectal Leakage, The Bastards, and MANY MORE!!!!

Just Send Us the Deed to Your House as Payment!!! Purchase NOW!!!

Text 7.

Von Dire Presents “Disemboweling The Dead” a Perverse Film from Celluloid Sinn with LIMITED SHOWINGS AVAILABLE NOW STREAMING ON OUR SINFUL WEBSITE!!!! ONLY $197.60!!! ACT NOW!!!

Text 8.

The Sultan of Slaughter, The Duke of The Damned, The King of Corpses, The Barron of Blood, The Price of Perversion, The President of the Perverse, The Prime Minister of Sinister VON DIRE RETURNS AFTER 2 YEAR ABSENCE!!!!!

“Mouth Full of Maggots” is Von Dire’s Return to the Wretched Movie!!!

Already Banned in 49 States and 42 Countries World Wide!!!

Available in 90 Days for $129.99 or an Advance Copy for just $119.99!!!

Text 9.

The Von Dire Movie “Gargling With Broken Glass” is now available fully remastered in GORE VISON !! Available Now For $665.99!! Gore Vision Glasses NOT INCLUDED! Gore Vison Glasses SOLD SEPARATELY and can be PURCHASED for $349.99!!!

Text 10.

The Satanic Semen Society to induct Infamous Film Maker VON DIRE into the Sleaze Hall Of Fame on Julember 32nd!!! Watch the Induction on PPV On Demand for $49.99 or Stream it LIVE on our Sinister Website for $74.99!!!!

Text 11.

BREAKING NEWS!! YUGOSLAVIAN FILTH FILM DIRECTOR VON DIRE!!!

VON DIRE was Arrested and charged with Crimes Against the Indigenous People of PogoPogo while filming his latest movie

“The Bloody Savages of The Flesh Forrst”

Stay Up To Date on this SHOCKING News Story by Subscribing to Our NEW YOURUBE Channel for a Low Monthly Charge of $79.99!!

WTF R U WAITING 4?!!

That My Readers is where it has ended for now, and We will have to wait and see if this situation will continue in the near future/future.

Thanks For Reading,

Les Sober