Tag: IT

We Bought a Clown Off The Dark Web (A Luxury Dark Double Feature)

Welcome to Today’s FYB Post featuring a WE BOUGHT A CLOWN OFF THE DARK WEB! and WE BOUGHT ANOTHER CLOWN OFF THE DARK WEB by the Content Creating Duo Channel Luxury Dark Inc. that are Oddly Entertaining in Our Opinion. Now Luxury Dark’s Formula is Pretty fucking Simplistic Two Teen Friends Chester and Parker who live Together Buy all kinds of Weird fucking shit Off the Dark Web. In this Installment Chester and Parker are Back in the Basement Surfing the Dark Web for Shits and Giggles. As these Video Go the Chester has Stumbled across Some Strange Dark Web Site in this case Buy-A-Clown Site, and as Always Parker is Vocally Against It. Though We all know by Now that No Matter how much Parker Protests Chester will get His Way.

Now as for the “Psycho Killer Clown” Genre of Horror You have everything from the Cheesy Killer Clowns From Outer Space to the Psychological Horror of Stephen King’s Killer Clown Classic IT to the Over the Top Bloody Gore of Art The Clown in the TERRIFIER Movies. As Far as Today’s 2 Videos are concerned the “Killer” Dark Web Clowns actually aren’t Too Shabby all things Considered. What I mean is these are a Couple of Short and Absurd YouTube Videos by a Couple of Teenage YouTubers (as Opposed to a Full Blown Feature Film Production). The Clowns definitely Keep it on the Creepier Side of Things, YET They manage, Barely at Times mind You, to Avoid Doing a Shitty Pennywise Impersonation. What is a Definite Plus is the Dark Web Clowns Dialogue is Kept to a Strict Minimum which Helps. The Last thing anyone wants to fucking watch is an Actors Slipping into a Cliche Evil Clown Impersonation which let’s Face It is Lame as fuck.

It is What it Is,

 Presented By Les Sober

Karlmayer

Welcome to Today’s FYB Post featuring KARLMAYER which is Yet Another Unknown Oddity that has Washed Up on Our Beach. No One seems to know a fucking thing about Who Posted It, Why They Posted It, Or What the fuck it’s Supposed to mean. So essentially its Insanity without Context.

WHAT WE FOUND:

  • The Video was Uploaded in May of 2008.
  • The Music is the Distorted High Pitch Child’s Laughter that Rapes Your Ear Drums Mercilessly so Heads the fuck up There.
  • The Only Real Piece of Actual Information lies in the Videos Description Which Simply Translates to the Name Karl Mayer. Karl Mayer was a German General Staff Officer who Introduced Hitler to Politics. And We all know How that Turned Out so Officially from FYB Fuck Him.

Video Run Down:

  • The Video Starts with the Illustration of Two Children that look Oddly Alien.
  • There Various Pictures of Flowers that Change Color, Distort, Morph, and Pulsate.
  • At the 46 Second Mark there is 2 Pictures of Pennywise from the Original TV Mini Series “IT” Not the Movie Remake/Reboot/Rewhatfuckingever You want to Call it.
  • More fucked up Flower Shit.
  • At the 1:13 Minute Mark there is a Close Up of What appears to be Some Child looking Doll Eyes.
  • Approximately at the 2:00 Mark the Video Takes a Dark Turn. The Video becomes More Distorted and Darker as the Abrasive Audio ramps Up Some.
  • Random Photos for Example a Thin John Wayne Gacy looking Clown and a Picture of the Actual Karl Mayer, and Then BACK TO THE FUCKING FLOWERS.
  • Then the Random Pictures and Flowers Mixed Together featuring such Random Images as An Old School Opera House, Pennywise again, some sort of Tunnel (possibly Subway), Ocean, and a Repeat of the Random Sky Shot from Earlier.

 

It is What It Is,

Presented By Les Sober

Tech Support is a Shitty Scam

We have all been there Countless Times over the Years to say the fucking least. At the most inconvenient moment possible some piece of technology that We are using/Need takes a massive shit, and refuses to right itself.

And after tooling around with the Device like the good old “Turn it off and on Again”  and other DIY tricks of the trade. When nothing within the realm of fucking Logic doesn’t work, and your Device is still having a Tantrum like a bratty fucking child We break the fuck down, curse under Our breath, and call Tech Support.

Yeah those Less Than Helpful 9 out of 10 times with Their bullshit attitudes, and general hating of They’re Lives. Well yup you fucking guessed it some of that Trifling Tech shit happened to Me just the other fucking day.

I jumped on My trusty fucking Laptop (AKA My Partner in Crime) logged on to the site here, and it was all normal until I pulled up a Post I was in the middle of working on. Thats when I found out My Format had somehow become completely fucked rendering pretty much everything if You think about it to a grinding halt.

I spent little over a hour trying My best to remedy the situation, but to no avail. I finally had to accept the fucked up fact that I’d have to call Tech Support in for this fucker.

I spent 40 fucking minutes talking with the first Guy and LITERALLY GOT NO WHERE. Apparently He couldn’t access My screen to see what the fuck I was seeing because something on My end effectively blocked Him before He could.

Well this dumb fuck tells Me since the issue is on My end I need to shut off whatever the fuck it is thats locking Him out. So I said fine tell Me then how the fuck I do it and I will now,  BUT thats when the TECH SUPPORT GUY informs Me for some unexplainable reason He can’t.

I then told the Guy how fucking stupid and utterly fucking absurd the issue was. Here I am the Tech Noob asking Him for help only to have Him tell Me Me He CAN”T DO A DAMN THING TO HELP. Then the Tech Expert tells the Noob He needs to figure out an issue the fucking TECH FUCKING EXPERT CAN’T.

Needless to say I was transferred to a Second Guy in what I was told was the TurdPress Live department.

After having to tell the Second joker all over again what the fuck was going on He tells Me He’s all too familiar with the issue and that He sees it several times a Month.

I then ask Him what the hell happened to which He replied an Automatic Update (I have experienced any such fucking thing, at least nothing fucked up like it in the 4 plus years I have been Paying this Provider) had a faulty Plugin that either didn’t load or it only partially loaded either way thats what clusterfucked My Beloved Format.

Now I’m feeling a bit better at least the Second Joker is familiar with the problem, and sounds like this Guy can fix it since He had NO trouble diagnosing the problem in great detail at length. Well I was Wrong.

The next fucking thing I know is this asshole is telling Me for some reason He won’t fucking tell me He can’t intact Fix the issue. I mean shit at least the First Joker had a reason for His incompetence. This Guy had DICK.

I then realized where the fuck this conversation was inevitably headed and that time I was right fucking on.

This assfuck goes on to say that if I want the problem fixed (and remember I can’t write/Post a goddamn thing without My fucking Format being fixed/working) I have to SIGN UP FOR THEIR TURDPRESS LIVE SERVICE.

Apparently They like SO many Others use TurdPress, but in this incidence the Provider Company created TURDPRESS LIVE just to handle all the fucking issues all the fucking users where having. How fucked is that shit I ask You?! A Secondary Company had to create a Tech Support Department to handle THE FIRST COMPANIES USER’S PROBLEMS.

Anyway I damn well know signing up for ANY and ALL ADDITIONAL SERVICES translates into “But You’ll have to PAY US MORE MONEY.” So I ask this fucking Guy how much, and He has the balls to tell Me its “just” a couple hundred a month.

He then lets Me know that most People sign up only for a few/couple months and then drop it like some People do with HBO and Their Game of Thrones Show as well as Other Similar Sinarios with Different Shows.

Bottomline is I’d have to buy a MONTH worth of Support to fix this one issue. I then asked this idiot what the fucking alternatives would be, and He says to surf forums asking questions (and see what the fuck happens) or scouring YouTube to see if You might find something of use. Both would require a great deal of time and effort, but still it all could come up with absolute dick as far as answers.

I was well pissed off by now as anyone would and told this clown I’d have to think about some shit and call back later or something. I sat around for a while killing time before My Wife came home form Work spitting venom.

I for one am SICK AS SHIT that I Pay all these different fucking companies and They all tell Me about the fucking spectacular Customer Service They provide for Their Customers.

Then You have an actual problem thus You call them for Help ONLY TO BE TOLD IT WILL COST YOU MORE FUCKING MONEY for Their Service that can actually fix the fucking problem/Provide the Service You want or need.

I mean where the fuck is the Customer Service Help I’m ALREADY FUCKING PAYING FOR?! How come all these phone fucks can do is charge Me more through some Upgrade orSpecific Service. Talk about Double Billing.

HERE’s The Kicker. Once My Wife got home see took a look at it and had it totally fixed in UNDER 15 Minutes FOR FUCKING FREE.

Tech Support/Customer Service can EAT SHIT SANDWICHES In Jersey.

Thanks for Reading,

 By Les Sober