Italy – f-your blog

PUMPKIN SPICE – White Woman Season

Welcome to Today’s FYB Post featuring PUMPKIN SPICE – WHITE WOMAN SEASON byOne of Our Favorite Animators Meatcanyon. MeatCanyon’s real name is Hunter August Hancock better know by His online user name MeatCanyon. Hancock is an American Youtuber, Animator, Voice Actor, Comedian, Writer, and Director who makes Parody Animations of Popular Characters (say Sponge Bob for instance). Some viewers of MeatCanyon’s Animations have been Described them in just One Single Word “Horrifying”. A common on going gag in Hancock’s video’s is that Something Normal or Mundane gets You Killed or Possible Worse.

One of the Key Reasons We get a Real fucking Kick Out of this Particular MeatCanyon Cartoons is the Social Commentary. First Off Let’s all fucking Face it this Pumpkin Spice Obsession that People have is Way the Hell Out of Control at this Point. It was Annoying Enough when it was just Fucking Starbucks (or Starbucks as We refer to Them as) Pimped Their Pumpkin Spice Coffee every fucking October Relentlessly. Then every Other Motherfucker started Peddling a Pumpkin Spice Version of Their fucking Products from Coffee Creamer to Spam. Yeah that’s fucking Right fucking SPAM the Infamous Canned fucking Meat adds Pumpkin Spice to the Ears and Assholes or Whatever Meat Scrap Dog Food They Use. Again I Think We all can fucking Agree when there is a Pumpkin Spice Spam shit has Gone WAY TOO fucking Far.

Now as Far as Starbucks is Concerned its Nothing More than a Caffeine Fueled Scam. Coffee is Simply Hot Water Filtered through fucking Coffee Bean Grounds so Essentially it’s Hot Caffeinated Coffee Flavored fucking Water. And We could care the fuck Less about all the Bullshit Gimmicks (There Others then just the Pumpkin Spice Shit) like Whip Cream Topping, Sprinkle of fucking Cinnamon, Adding Caramel fucking Drizzle it’s all Horseshit. Also We Do Not Give a Flying fuck that They call Their Employees as fucking Baristas or That They sell fucking Fruit. Not to Mention the Pathetically Lame CDs (Yeah fucking CDs believe that Shit) by People NO ONE GIVES A RAT’S ASS ABOUT which is Why Their CD is being Sold at a Pompous Over Rated Commercialized Coffee Shop Chain.

Bottomline on this Starbucks bullshit is They try WAY TOO FUCKING HARD to come off as Some Authentic High Class Italian Coffee Shop. The Reality it’s Run by Greedy Corporate Whores and is a Americanized Wannabe Classy European/Italian Bistro when it’s just a SCAM to get Gullible Gimmick Loving Lemmings to Pay $9 for Hot Coffee Flavored Water. If Your a Starbucks Fan and get all Bent about this Please Go Butt Chug a $12 DickNip-Dipshit-Half Caff Motherfucking Mocha Latte on Us (and Don’t forget the fucking Pumpkin Spice Asshole)!!!

Enjoy.

It is What it Is,

Presented By Les Sober

Interplanetary Revolution

Welcome to Today’s FYB Post featuring INTERPLANETARY REVOLUTION Posted by Content Creator known as Toadsmiles. Toadsmiles YouTube Channel is SO Obscure (Only 4 Videos Posted Over 15 Years and a Total of a Mere 146 Subscribers) that if it was Any More Obscure it simply wouldn’t fucking Exist. Now this Video is Exceptionally fucking Weird because it’s an “Art Imitates Life and Life Imitates Art” Scenario. What We mean by that is INTERPLANETARY REVOLUTION is an Actual Russian Anti-Capitalist Propaganda Cartoon Fantasy Short Released August 18, 1924 . The Cartoon Short was Created (and Co Directed) by Nikolai Petrovich Khodataev and the Experimental Studio State Tech Kino. Khodataev was a Russian and Soviet Artist, Sculptor, and Animator who was a one of the Founders of the Soviet Animation Industry.

When it comes to Watching INTERPLANETARY REVOLUTION Luckily there is No Dialogue so No Annoying Subtitles to be Concerned with, and All Russian Text is Translated Directly on the Screen as Opposed to Closed Caption. Whats interesting is there are Several Different Types of Animation from Traditional Cartoon to Monty Python like Animation, to some Strange shit You’d See on Adult Swim at 2 in the fucking Morning. Now this Cartoon is pretty fucking Far Out in the Deepest Depths of Left fucking Field that’s for sure. It can get Chaotic and Confusing so We have Key Point Pertaining to INTERPLANETARY REVOLUTION Below.

INTERPLANETARY REVOLUTION BREAK DOWN:

The Alien Monarch of Mars Never Invented Democracy.
The Closing Sequence Features a Portrait of Vladimir Lenin.
The Animation is Best Described as “Deranged”.
The Imperial Stormtrooper Marksmanship Academy – The Alien Emperor’s 4 Guards Defend Him Triumphantly, Slaughtering Rebels in DOZENS of Shots. In the Later Shots the Guards seem to be Poorly Armed and Won by Sheer Numbers Alone.
The Leader – The Commissar (An Official of the Communist Party, Especially in the Former Soviet Union Responsible for Political Education/Organization) brings Revolution to the Planet Mars just by Speaking to a Local Proletariat ( A Proletariat is a Working Class of People, Regarded Collectively and Often Used with Reference to Marxism).
The Planet Mercury is Featured by a Man Resembling a Pre-Revolutionary Russian Shopkeeper. The Many Armed and Unfriendly Fellow isn’t Identified but is Believed to Most likely be the Planet Jupiter.
We See a the Eyes of the Moon turning into a Man and Woman who start Hugging and Kissing. The Commissar finds this to be Wildly Amusing BUT it has NO Relation to the Plot of INTERPLANETARY REVOLUTION.
Those Fucking Nazis: The Time being 1924, INTERPLANETARY REVOLUTION Features a Rather Wacky Italian Faschist (Who at that time were Best Known for Fighting Communism).
The Cartoon States (INTERPLANETARY REVOLUTION) is “A Fully Probable Event in/of 1929” just a mere 5 Years after INTERPLANETARY REVOLUTION came out and was Said in All Seriousness.

AND WITHOUT FURTHER ADU HERE IS INTERPLANETARY REVOLUTION. Enjoy.

It is What it Is,

Presented By Les Sober

The Faceless Lady And The Bleeding Picture

Welcome to Today’s FYB Post THE FACELESS LADY AND THE BLEEDING PICTURE by Italian Artist, Graphic Designer, Published Author, Sculpture, and Illustrator Paolo Ferrante. Finding Information on Ferrante was/is Tricky as there isn’t a Whole Hell on A lot.

Here are We Found:

Ferrante was Born in 1984.
Ferrante was Born and Lives in the Italian Province of Lecca.
In 2008 Ferrante had His First Book “Le Commedie del Buio”
Ferrante Graduated from The Academy of the Fine Arts in Lecca in 2010.
In 2021 Ferrante made the Finals of the International Poster For Tomorrow Competition with the Theme “Fake News”
Ferrante has His Own Wesite www.ever.trip it/
Ferrante is also can be Found on evertrip.artstation.com
Ferrante has both an Instagram and Telegraph Accounts Under the User Name EverTrip in Addition to His YouTube Channel.

NOTE: Now everything about this 20 something Second Slice of Absurd Inanity would be just Fine at Face fucking Value, But there are 2 Apects/Details in the Video that I can’t fucking Stop Thinking about I just keep Mulling it Over and Over in My Free fucking Time. First is Who the fuck is the fucking Weirdo in the Background, and I’m Not Sure if it’s Supposed to be an Actual Photo or some Pop Art Bullshit Painting. Anyway I’m Referring to it as the Photo and I wonder what the hell is it’s Significance?! I mean Why bother including it at all unless there is some sort of Method to the Madness. Second Why Does the Photo Begin to (and Continues Throughout the Rest of the Video) Start Dripping fucking Blood like a fucking 1980’s B-Horror Slasher fucking Movie. Again I ask What the fuck is the Reason the Photo is Bleeding What the fuck is the Point? Perhaps Adding it was the Point and the Point being its just Simply a Way to fuck with People’s Heads.

It is What it Is,

Presented By Les Sober

Evil Animation: MOLOCH

Welcome to Another Monday Post here at FYB featuring MOLOCH by Italian Artist, Graphic Designer, Published Author, Sculpture, and Illustrator Paolo Ferrante. Finding Information on Ferrante was/is Tricky as there isn’t a Whole Hell on A lot, and What there is needs to be Translated unless You speak Fluent Italian (and as We all Know Google Translation is Less than Reliable).

Here are The Bio Info We Located:

Ferrante was Born in 1984.
Ferrante was Born and Lives in the Italian Province of Lecca.
In 2008 Ferrante had His First Book “Le Commedie del Buio”
Ferrante Graduated from The Academy of the Fine Arts in Lecca in 2010.
In 2021 Ferrante made the Finals of the International Poster For Tomorrow Competition with the Theme “Fake News”
Ferrante has His Own Wesite www.ever.trip it/
Ferrante is also can be Found on evertrip.artstation.com
Ferrante has both an Instagram and Telegraph Accounts Under the User Name EverTrip.

Ferrante has an Obscure Youtube Channel Under the Name EverTrip and Here the Stats:

Joined January 13, 2007
Number of Videos 18
321 Subscribers
56,146 Total Views

Synopsis: Two Nightmarish Ghouls meet up in the Middle of the Night in the Depths of Woods to Conduct a Black Magic Demonic Summoning Ritual.

Enjoy.

Thanks For Watching,

Presented By Les Sober

Strange and Disturbing Videos: 00390

Welcome to yet Another Installment of Strange and Disturbing Videos featuring 00390 One of Youtube’s Darkest Mysteries. So without Further Ado let’s Jump on Down this Rabbit Hole Hand in Hand.

00390 Rumors, Hypotheses, and Outstanding Questions:

00390 First Surfaced Online in November 2015, and is Still Currently Active.
After Six Years 00390 has Posted Over 100+ Videos
After Posting a String of Videos Viewers found Creepy and Disturbing.
Viewers Began to Speculate and Many came to Believe 00390’s Youtube Channel was in Fact being Run by a Stalker and Likely a Kidnapper.
As More Videos were Posted Viewers started to Believe 00390 wasn’t just into Stalking and Abductions. They began to hypothesis that 00390 was Actually a Real Life Serial Killer, but it Doesn’t End There.
One Strange Factor stood Out as Particularly Weird and that was the Handful of Video’s Sprinkled in with the Grimmer/Disturbing Content. These Video’s were of Food being Cooked.
All the Food Videos had Meat as it’s Primary Ingredient.
The Food Videos started the Rumor that 00390 was Not just a Serial Killer but a Cannibal as Well.

The Cannibal Rumor was indeed Confirmed by 00390 in the Comments Section of the Video Doll House Working Test-Cooking Some Meat.
In the Doll House Video’s comment Section which Reads like a Recipy Under the Ingredient Referred to Simply as Meat 00390 States “For Meat: You Need a Girl.”
Due to Various Videos by 00390 like Exploring Summer Night Streets-Hookers that 00390 is Based Out of Europe. Also a Phrase that Appears on Screen at one Point in the Video in Italian and Translates into “Too Fat”.
While 00390’s Average Views Per Video is Around 2,000, but Exploring Summer Nights-Hookers has Racked Up a Whopping 1.7 Million Views. The Reason(s) for this Massively Drastic Difference in the Number of Views is Currently Unknown.

In Addition to the Already Addressed Information when You go to 00390’s About Page (the Cryptic and Antisocial Description) Appears First in English and then in Italian. Thus it’s Pretty Safe to Say 00390 calls Italy Home.
00390’s About Page Verbatim:

“Do not subscribe, you bother me.

Non iscrivetevi, mi date fastidio.

Do not offer me money for affiliation or visualization or other, I’am not interested. At best offer me some typical food of your country.

Non offritemi soldi per affilizazioni o visualizzazioni dei video, non mi interessa. Al massimo offritemi qalche cibo tipico del vostro paese. Mi piacciono le ragazze fredde (ma vive).”

(Note to Reader: Based on the Cannibal Concept behind 00390 does “At best offer me some typical food of your country” mean Send Female Human Flesh from Your Home Country.)

Now while You could if You wanted to go Check out the 100+ Videos by 00390, but I’ve searched through 00390’s Video Catalog. I ended up Selecting 10 of the Darkest/Creepiest Videos that Showcase the Aspects of 00390’s Videos mentioned above. Here is a List (Along with any Notes and Observations of Ours) of the Ten Video 00390 Sampling in the Order They Appear in:

Pet Monster Forgotten Video: Who are These People Singing? Why are there Several Photos of Women Restrained and Gaged with Hearts Around Them?
Exploring Summer Night Streets-Hookers: This is the Video that has racked up 1.7 Million Views as Opposed to the Average 2,000 per 00390 Video)
Dressed Girl in the Bath Scared Screams: Is This a Possibly a Abducted Victim?
Audi/Video Torture for Kidnapped Girl [Explicit and a Little Flashing]
Old Footage-How to find a Girl: How to Find a Girl? How to Find/Stalk a Victim)
How to Transport a Semi Unconscious Girl: Is This Staged? We don’t think so considering it be hard to go completely Limp like the Girl in the Video. Also at a couple of Points You can see Her feet moving Under Her own Power (Hence the Semi Conscious Part of the Title I Suppose.)
From the Bar to the Basement-Lesson: This Video is a Distorted/Manipulated of the 2006 Comedy Movie School For Scoundrels staring Billy Bob Thornton .
Girl Talk Too Much: This is Obviously Fake as Fuck. The Tongue in the Video is an Animal Tongue is more than likely a Cow’s. If You look at it for more than a Moment You can see there is Absolutely No fucking Way on Earth that the Tongue would fit in a Human Mouth.
Test_Sony a5100 Less Light: Is this Footage of a Captive Victim?
Doll HouseStove- Working Test- Cooking Some Meat: The Glaring Question is Based on the Cannibalism Angle is this the Meat in the Video Actually Human Flesh?

Enjoy.

In Summation:

Well in Conclusion We believe these Videos are Strange, Disturbing, and Ultimately Fake. 00390’s Videos also Don’t appear to be Promotions for a Video Game or Movie since the Videos have been Posted over 6 Plus years. So Unless this is an “Axl Rose – Chinese Democracy” Situation the Promotion Angle makes No Sense. A Possibly Viable Reason for 00390’s Videos could be that this is Art Student or Visual Artist’s on Going Art Project. Though I think there’s a Bit more to It. As Far as this being an ARG it Very Well could be it, but I am Not 100% Convinced this is the Case.

I think this is simply Someone Who wants/likes People Thinking/Believing that They’re some Insanely Psychotic Serial Killer and Crazed Cannibal straight out of a B-Horror Movie. The Point is I think 00390 is creating and Posting these Videos because He/She/They get a Kick Out of It. Sometimes the Simplest Solution is Sufficient as Face Value has its Own Worth.

Thanks For Reading/Watching,

Presented By Les Sober

Short Horror Film Friday: The Horribly Slow Murderer With The Extremely Inefficient Weapon

We are Delighted Present this Week’s Short Horror Film Friday Featuring the 2008 Horror Comedy The Horribly Slow Murderer With The Extremely Inefficient Weapon Written, Directed, and Narrated by Richard Gale. The 11 Minute Film was Filmed Entirely in California with a Panasonic HVX200 over the Course of 22 Days on a $600 Budget.

The Movie itself is Presented as Being a Trailer for a Whopping 9 Hour Long Movie. It starts with a Voiceover, telling the Viewer that: “Some Murders take Seconds; Some Murders take Minutes; This Murder….will take Years!”

Synopsis:

The Movie Portrays the Story of a Forensic Pathologist Named Jack Cucchiaio (Cucchiaio is the Italian Word for Spoon), Who Finds Himself being Tormented by a Deranged and Ghoulish looking Man, Who is, Without any Clear Reason, Hitting Him with a Spoon. No One seems to believe this though as the Ominous Attacker Only shows up when Jack is Alone. As Jack’s Torment Continues He starts to Develop a Phobia of Spoons resorting to Stirring His Coffee with a Fork for Example.

Jack Attempts to Defend Himself by Stabbing the Ghoulish Man in the Throat with a Kitchen Knife, but to Jack’s Surprise He turns out to be Immortal. The Ghoulish Man Simply pulls the Knife Out of HIs Throat and Tosses it Away before continuing to Hit Jack with the Dreaded Spoon. However, in this Scene Jack Notices a Strange Sign on the Arm of the Ghoulish Man.

Jack Travels to the Far East where HE Learns that the Ghoulish Man is Known as The Ginosaji (which is Japanese for “Silver Spoon”), an Immortal and Unstoppable Being. It Searches for a Victim to Terrorize and Slowly Kill by Repeatedly Hitting Them with a Spoon. The Ginosaji will Follow Jack to the Ends of the Earth, and it will Never Stop Attacking Jack until Jack is Dead. In Spite of Learning about the Ginosaji Jack still tries to Escape the Ginosaji by Traveling Around the Globe, and Repeatedly Trying to Kill it with Various Weapons such as Guns, Dynamite, and Even a RPG (Rocket Propelled Grenade.) but all His Efforts are Futile. That is Until as the Ginosaji is Striking a Worn Out, Weakened, and Wounded Jack as He is Crawling through the Desert THE SPOON BREAKS!!

Is this Some Sort of Supernatural Loophole that will Allow Jack to Finally Rid Himself of The Ginosaji Once and For All? You’ll have to watch and See for Yourself.

Enjoy.

We Hope You Enjoyed This Tale Of Slaughter By Spoon as Much as We Did.

Thanks For Watching,

Presented By Les Sober (Pt1202am)

A Monday Night of Sickening Cinema: The City Of The Living Dead!!!

THE CITY OF THE LIVING DEAD is a 1980 Italian Zombie Splatter Horror Movie Directed by Lucio Fulci who also Wrote the the Screenplay, and plays Pathologist Dr. Joe Thompson in the Film. Although Fulci worked in a Wide Array of Genres as a Director, Screen Writer, Producer, and Actor over His nearly 50 Career in the Film Industry. Fulci garnered an International Cult Following for His Giallo (in the Movie Context, for Italian Audiences Giallo has come to refer to Any Kind of Murder Mystery or Horror Thriller) and Horror Movies. Due to the High Level of Visceral and Graphic Violence that present in Many of Fulci’s Films that He is Frequently Referred to as “The Godfather of Gore”, A Title Given to American Splatter Movie Gore Master Herschell Gordon Lewis.

The Movie was released in Italy in 1980 under the Title Paura fella cotta dei Mortifications Vivrnti in Italy which translates to ‘Fear in the City of the Living Dead’, and was Released in the United State in 1983 the Title Twilight of the Dead, which Resulted in a Cease and Desist Order from United Film Distribution Company due to the Title’s similarity to Their Own Film, George A. Romero’s Dawn of the Dead. Thus the Distributer, Motion Picture Marketing, withdrew the Film and Re-Released it under the New Title The Gates of Hell.

Brief Plot Summery:

The Movie is set in the Shunned Village of Dunwich (a Tribute to H.P. Lovecraft’s The Dunwich Horror), where the Priest Father Thomas commits SUICIDE by Hanging Himself which Results in a GATEWAY TO HELL Opening, and Turning loose a Ravenous Pack of ZOMBIES OF THE DAMNED! Meanwhile during a Seance in New York, Mary Woodhouse sees Morbid and Horrific Visions of the Priest’s Suicide, and its Dire Consequences leading up to a ZOMBIE ONSLAUGHT on All Saints Day. Mary then suddenly Collapses to the Floor and Convulses then She appears to Die, Only to be Rescued from Premature Burial by the Journalist Peter Bell. The Two Travel to Dunwich to DESTROY THE GRAVE of Father Thomas in order to Stop the MASS ZOMBIE INVASION!

An Italian Newspaper La Stampa’s review of the Film “Not recommended for easily impressionable viewers.”, with a Story that grew Progressively into a “Expressive Nightmarish Atmosphere”
Jay Carr of the Boston Globe said “A Film Only a Diehard Necrophile could Love”
Dick Fleming of The Daily Times “Scenes Purely for the Sake of Shock Value”
Ringle wrote”Idiotic Sleaze Fest with Nothing to Offer but an Abundance of Filmed Animal Innards.”
AllMovie “City of the Living Dead benefits from Fulci’s ability to Create and Sustain an Intensely Creepy Atmosphere…. the Blending of Graphic Shocks and Surrealistic Atmosphere .”

Movie Quote: Mary Woodhouse “The City of the Dead. The Living Dead. A Cursed City where the Gates of Hell have been Opened.” Enjoy.

We Hope You Enjoyed this Italian Supernatural Splatter Film’s Flesh Eating Zombie Fiasco as Much as We Did.

Thanks for Watching,

Presented By Les Sober

Italy is Awesome, BUT Florence Fn Sucks.

For those paying attention to this shit I mentioned that there where Two pertinent points from a recent trip to Italy that I would Post about. I’m not writing a Travel Blog here (not in the fucking least), and I don’t work for fucking National Geographic either so there You go.

In the First Post Tilted “Marijuana: Whats Going On In Italy” was addressing Italy’s stance and legality of Marijuana. For those who didn’t read it by chance in summation: It Sucks plain and simple.

The following Post is the Second Point I’d like to make regarding Italy.

Now I feel it is of utter importance to make it ABUNDANTLY clear that I am in NO WAY talking shit about Italy. So what if Their stance on Marijuana Sucks Their far from alone so can’t fault Them there. Also if ONE City bites the Big One You can’t fault the ENTIRE fucking COUNTRY because of it thats fucking ignorant as a motherfucker.

It is true Italy is full of Cities/Towns that revel in Medieval Majesty in spades and that putting it lightly. One day a Member of Our or Clan wanted to take a Road Trip to Florence because its the Home of Michelangelo’s David among other amazing things to see/do.

We all agreed, loaded up, and got the car caravan rolling down the narrow and winding mountain roads towards the City of Florence Our hopes held high. They just weren’t high enough as it turned out.

For the record the ACTUAL CITY of Florence is Beautiful as well as draped in History. And The City is home to many wonderful Works of Art. It’s only once Your parked, and walking the streets that You begin to see what MAKES spending time in Florence inevitably Suck Serious Ass.

In Florence the Biggest Unwanted Hassles come from Three different Groups of Street Hustlers. I will be listening them in Order from the Lesser of Three Evils to the Worst of the Worst.

And Away We GO…….

The least Offensive of the Three aforementioned Groups are the Homeless looking Pan Handlers/Beggars.

Now Plenty of People in America bitch and whine about how Beggars are a bother being Dirty looking and depressing. Basically these People find Beggars to simply be what They consider a Living Human Eyesore.

All in all though the American Beggars to Their credit remain stationary having posted up in a particular spot, and are quietly subservient showing the shame They feel for being in Their unfortunate situation.

This is NOT the case in Florence. For starters Beggars there roam the streets constantly on the move pacing all over the fucking City. That though isn’t the real problem.

The real problem is Their aggressive in Your face style of asking for spare change. They will walk right up in your personal space and then shove some shitty paper cup in your face. At this point the stare blankly into your eyes and shake the cup jingling the small amount of change at the bottom.

I believe the fact that Florence is full of Visitors from around the Globe the Beggars use the Language Barrier to Their advantage. It affords Them the Luxury of Lingering longer.

The final Tactic They employ is just that Lingering. No matter how many times you tell them No They remain fixed in front of You refusing to accept Your answer.

Also I noticed that like with the Police when You’re dealing with one another one seems to always show up as well. I’m not sure what the second Beggars strategy is exactly, but its one of the following.

Its either They are using Their presence to up the pressure for the Mark to just give up and give them some money just to fuck off out of Their faces.

It could also be that They like attracted to the commotion like a Shark to a Feeding Frenzy, and just shows up out of instinct looking for an easy score. Perhaps its just that They think the primary Beggar has found a generous party, and wants a piece of the generosity.

The only saving grace is Pan Handling is illegal in Florence which is why the Beggars stay on the move to avoid the Police Foot Patrols (as well as every other fucking Cop). This means while Their tactics are bullshit They ironically can’t afford to hang around too long before having to keep moving to avoid arrest.

The Second Group of Hustlers have far more flair to Their Song and Dance Scheme. They are extremely friendly, energetic, outgoing, and quick with a smile. They will approach You introduce Themselves, and instantly strike up a friendly conversation generally over the typical bullshit. They ask where your from, how you like Italy/Florence, whats your home country is like, and so on.

Once the conversation is in full fucking swing They make Their play. Without even mentioning it or bringing an ounce of attention to it They will inadvertently hand You some sort of cheap ticket like a Bumble Machine Bracelet or some other shit, and Then after a bit more lip service They ask You to Pay Them for whatever completely ridiculous trinket They handed You just moments ago.

Thats fucking insane. Thats the equivalent of Me going into a Clothing Store and walking straight up to the counter. Then the Clerk hands Me whatever is laying around in Lost and Found and charges Me for it. It’s nothing I want or need it’s something I wouldn’t let My Kid waste Their money on, but The Store just assumes I’ll to buy it.

Once the Jig is Up like the Beggars these Hustlers throw Their hands up, step away from You, and basically refuse to take it back, BUT through it all They still expect You to Pay Them for it.

You virtually drop whatever cheap piece of shit They handed You on the fucking ground before They will collect Their crap and piss off elsewhere.

The Final Group of Offenders are the absolute fucking WORST OF THE WORST, and that Group would be The Gypsies.

For clarification purposes Gypsies are NOT the Withered Old Crones who place Curses on People in Horror Movies. Nor are the the Magical and Mystical Fortune Tellers like in Disney fucking Cartoons.

I was some what aware that Gypsies had a rather Shady, and rather Shitty reputation in Europe apparently it seemed.

In Europe They are essentially considered Nomadic Con Artists. Gypsies for the most part Travel around the Country Scamming and Cheating the People the encounter along the way.

They are also looked down upon as petty small time Thieves who deal in such things as Games of Chance or Pick Pocketing.

Bottom Line: They are NOT to be trusted EVER.

With that said on with the Story.

In Florence roaming around in the Streets there are in fact authentic Gypsies. They have a rather unconventional and slightly confusing Scam You see.

It’s significant I believe to note at this point that NONE of these Gypsy Street Scam Arist’s are/were Men.

The Scam is as Absurd as it is ridiculous. The Gypsies cake Their faces with some sort of what looks to be lead based face paint. Now there are no other markings like the black eyeliner accents seen with Mimes or Added color like with Clown Aesthetics.

The clothes they dress up in are by far the lamest outfits or lame fucking attempt at a fucking costume.

They dress very plain with Long Simple Skirts that are so long they damn near hide Their feet from view. They sport these White Billowy Shirts, and These matching white hat like headdresses called Mob Caps. So in the end the affect most resembles a 18th century Peasant who worked as a Servant in some Rich Son of a Bitch’s Kitchen as a Scullery Maid.

What They do is the sneak up behind some Poor Bastard when he’s not paying attention (usually do to a plethora a distractions Florence provides) and suddenly grab ahold of His/Her wrist.

They then without saying a single word (which is exactly like a fucking Mime) the start posing with The Mark is cheesy clique poses such as a Hug While Cheek to Cheek, Kissing You on the Cheek, Holding Your Hand while making some bullshit Puppy Love Face or some stupid shit like that.

They also encourage whoever is with The Mark to take a Photo, and then usually then run the same bullshit routine on Them as well.

And unlike the tools that hang around on the streets of Hollywood in Super Hero Costumes, and shit like that who pose for tips these Gypsy fuckers STRAIT UP DEMAND YOU PAY THEM (though You NEVER solicited Them for any sort of bullshit Song and Dance Photo Opportunity)

This is exactly what happen when Our Clan stopped in a Plaza/Town Square, and for one fucking fleeting second I forgot to put My hand back in my pocket. I was keeping My hands in My pockets to guard My Phone as well as Wallet, but also so they specifically couldn’t be grabbed by The Fucked Up Gypsy Scullery Maid motherfuckers.

My initial instinct was FUCK THEM We didn’t ask Them for jack shit so thus We owe them NOTHING. Also I was simultaneously trying to remember the Italian word for Police since I as mentioned just like with the Beggars what the Gypsies are doing is ILLEGAL.

I just figured if I said Police a few times while getting louder each time it scare the scumbags off. If need be though I have no problem with conflict so if They felt Froggy I’d eat Their fucking Legs.

Well My Wife is much nicer so when the short Gypsy Woman squared up to Her (being a demanding piece of fucking shit), and wanted 20 Euros or about $29 U.S. as payment .

My Wife was well aware that when this bullshit Horse and Pony Show started what the hell it was, and were it would inevitably End. Again being FAR NICER than I ever could be She agreed to 20 Euros.

I wasn’t really fucking happy about that, but its not My job to be happy it’s to Back My Wife’s Plays.

What happened next only lead to further complicate the already awkward as fuck situation that was playing out. My Wife went to retrieve the 20 Euros from Her damn near wallet sized travel purse (or whatever the thing is).

At the same time She was keeping watch for any possible Purse Snatchers or other Petty Thieves, and by sheer shitty luck accidentally pulled out a 50 Euro bill (that had been sitting behind the 20 Euro bill) at the same time.

You probably have already deduced what happened next yeah?! The fucking Gypsy Woman after seeing the fucking 50 now is suddenly now demanding 50 Euros. My Wife put her foot down and told the Bitch that They had agreed on 20 Euro so 20 Euros it was.

Of fucking course the despicable Gypsy Woman sticks to Her Guns, BUT at the same time My Wife was Standing Her Ground. Apparently We had a Stand Off on Our Hands so to speak.

The Gypsy Woman starts getting louder and louder until She is damn near Yelling.We had no idea what she was ranting about because none of us

spoke anything close to fluent Italian. I don’t think that mattered in the least as the whole Scam relies on Pressure and Aggression to extort money.

Meanwhile My Wife is aggressively at this point to take the agreed upon 20 and take a fucking hike. I’m just waiting and watching to be ready for whatever the fuck might happen next as things started to escalate quickly.

The fucking Gypsy Woman is trying to literally get in My Wife’s face while My Wife dodges Her, and has now started waving her arms around in the air like some sort of Asshole. She’s also accelerated Her speech to the point She sounded like some fucking Italian Auctioneer in the middle of a bidding frenzy.

The Other People on in the Plaza (about 25-30) had started to take notice and even stopped to observer the building chaos. This turned into BUT keeping a low profile. The Attention of a growing Crowd called direct attention to the Gypsies who didn’t want to get the attention of the Police.

Finally to everyones fucking relief the Gypsy Woman’s Partner in Crime shows up out of no where like a fucking Ninja, and grabs Her friend by the arm. This does virtually nothing to calm the ongoing conflict as Her friend wasn’t about to drop a goddamn thing.

Her Partner in Crime had started to physically pull Her away from Us, and thank god She was the stronger of the two since Her friend kept ranting and raving to beat the fucking band every goddamn step of the fucking way.

At last the pair of Street Hustling Gypsy Scam Artists had vanished down one of the many dark and rather narrow side streets much like Cockroaches running from the Light.

Before I bring this fucker to an end there are a couple of other things about Florence I feel compelled to mention.

One is Florence has been converted into a MASSIVE Tourist Trap. Due to the Fact Florence draws in a lot of Tourists all the fucking prices for any and everything has been jacked sky high to the point its just a fucking rip off.

Also all the Tourist are so thick and heavy in Florence that your damn about shoulder to shoulder walking in the streets. Its like being at fucking Disney during the years largest Promotion just mobbed as a motherfucker.

The last thing is this. There (I suppose again to to the booming Tourist Trade Florence experiences) WAY TOO FUCKING MANY American Stores. I mean I didn’t travel across the fucking Ocean to go fucking shopping at Hugo Boss, Disney Store or eat at Burger King. Actually this was the one and only time We did in fact see a American Fast Food joint as Fast Food is a virtually alien concept.

All in All Italy is AWESOME as all get out, BUT Florence SUCKS A BAG A DICKS.

Thanks for Reading,

By Les Sober

Mediterranean Marijuana : Whats Going On In Italy

Recently My Wife and I had an outstanding opportunity to spend 9 days in a sprawling 6 bedroom Villa. The Villa was located atop one of the majestic Moutan’s of Tuscany. The fact the Villa came with actual Million Euro View of the lush vineyard filled Valley was an unreal bonus.

The only reason I know that is the current owner told us he had decided to sell the Villa and retire to city of Siena and then informed me he sold it for 1 Million Euros.

Any who enough of that Hallmark Reminiscing. I’m not going to right about the entire trip not even close. I’m not writing my Biography nor am I a travel Guide Author. I will be writing about the 2 key points of interest (as far as I’m concerned) from the trip, and this is the First.

As a Pot Enthusiast and with the curiosity of a 1,000 cats decided that before we departed to investigate what the Marijuana Situation was currently in Italy in General. This is what I found out.

Italy in fact does sell recreational Marijuana that they have Labeled as “Light” and isn’t hard to find either for that matter. Now immediately I wondered what the fuck Their definition of “Marijuana Light” exactly was. Apparently “Marijuana Light” as defined by the Government of Italy is the following:

“Light Marijuana sold for recreational usage can only contain a total THC content of 0.5% OR LESS.”

What does that mean for Pot Smokers? It means THERES NO FUCKING POINT IN EVEN BOTHERING SMOKING “LIGHT” MARIJUANA.

The Astronomically low THC content makes smoking it like smoking the shittiest Dirt Weed you’ve ever known, It’s absolutely NOTHING compared to the High Grade shit grown in America as well as other Legal Countries around the World.

Would you want to drink a Beer that had only 0.5% Alcohol in it. Hell No I’m guessing since it negates the point. Same here with Marijuana and its Perspective THC Levels.

According to those People who have actually smoked the Italian Light brand of Marijuana its harsh as hell, tastes like dirt or Barn Yard, You won’t catch a buzz BUT more than likely who will get a shitty headache.

This leads me to believe that Italian Light Marijuana isn’t even from a Female Plant. I think their smoking Males Plants (Who have THC in their small leaves, but do not produce the desirable buds of the Female Plant.

That is why traditionally Male Plants were converted into Hemp Products. I have also heard that if you smoke Hemp, even an entire football fucking field of it, all you’ll get is a wicked cough and nasty headache.

The next thing I found out through research and inquiry is that there were a few Tourist Trap Stores that were nothing but a complete fucking fake and utter rip off scattered around certain Cities.

People who had seen or visited these establishments warned to avoid at all costs. They main reason was simple theses stores where dealing in Bait & Switch Style False Advertising that prayed on peoples ignorance. The stores were pure bullshit hype, nothing more.

So where is the Marijuana tie in you may be wondering. Well here it is.I stumbled across one of these Stores in Florence ( a city that has become one big fucking shitty tourist trap) so I went in to scout it out.

These Stores DO NOT SELL MARIJUANA PRODUCTS THAT CONTAIN THC.

They are NOT DISPENSARIES.

They are RETAIL STORES.

This is important to point out as The Store from its Name CANNABIS Store Amsterdam (note Cannabis is in all Caps), to their products labels CanniPops, Cannabis Cookies, CannaGummy and so on were all designed to mislead the consumer into thinking their buying a legit THC product when in fact their purchasing a CBD Marijuana Derivative/Extract.

This is Shady as shit because while the Labels, Sales People, and Interior of the Store (which is like a Hot Topics of Marijuana) AREN’T LYING. Even though the entire Store and its designed to decieve CBD is in fact extracted from The Marijuana Plant so its Technically a Marijuana Product. They can simply claim its not Their fault the customer bought something under a ignorant assumption.

Its greedy scummy Scam/Con Artists like these fuckers at CANNABIS Store Amsterdam that really chaps my ass cashing in on their crap while corroding the legitimate. Their all Smoke and Mirrors. Their a preverbal Horse and Pony Show. THEY ARE BULLSHIT.

The last thing I discovered along the way was in the end Italy is like most places where Marijuana (or in this case Mainstream Marijuana) is still illegal its the same old You need to know a Guy or Find the Friend of a Guy to purchase quality Marijuana.

Plenty of People advised that the best places to find Black Market Marijuana in Italy is in areas densely populated by Students. This is a no fucking brainer you ask me its just a matter of common sense.

I was also told that as long as you don’t smoke out in the open or in Touristy Areas then the Police really aren’t concerned, so if you smoke Weed in Italy just be respectful, Mindful, and Discreet.

Thanks for Reading,

By Les Sober

Global Graffiti : A Retrospective in Street Art

One of my fascinations lies in my intense interest in Graffiti Art/ Artists from around the Globe.

Graffiti has a Message be it Political, Social, Independent Thought, Original Ideas/Concepts, or Art for The People to enjoy (to provide a reprieve from the mundane toiling of work and obligations that dominate most of our lives.)

Art is Universal.

So its no surprise that one of my various projects is assembling a pictorial showcasing Street Art of all kinds in any and all forms that it inhabits.

Here is a Sampling of Content from the upcoming “Global Graffiti : A Retrospective in Street Art”

Collected, Compiled, and Arranged By

Les Sober