Tag: moment of clarity

Cartoons That Aren’t For Children: TEETH

FYB is Delighted to Present the Short Horror Film TEETH By Daniel Gray and Tom Brown, and Presented by ALTER.

TEETH is the Tale of the Narrator’s Life Long Abnormal Obsession with His Teeth and How it Ultimately Affected His Entire Being. From His First Tooth at 2 1/2, and the Utter Disregard for His Teeth that He developed due to the Unpleasantness of the Teething Process.

As a Young Child He would intentionally abuse His Teeth in an Attempt to Literally Punish Them for Their Existence. At 6 1/2 the Narrator Laments that at this point though He managed to Lose His Primary Teeth They were Immediately Replaced by His Adult Teeth. The Narrator had No Interest in Dental Health Only with Sweet Sugary Foods instead.

              

At 11 He loses a Bicuspid in a Fight After School and finds Absolute Delight in the Gap where His Tooth Used to Be. By 48 the Narrator is continuously Losing His Teeth due the Neglect of Oral Hygiene, and at this Point He actually starts to Miss His Long Lost Teeth since it Complicates Eating (and like MOst of Us He thoroughly Enjoys Food).

Eventually The Narrator has Lost So Many of His Natural Teeth that He must get Dentures at which Time He has a Revelation. He realizes at Last the Necessary and Enjoyable Link between Eating, Teeth, Tongue and Stomach. This Moment of Clarity leads to the Narrator taking a Great Deal of Pride in His Artificial Teeth to the Point that He rearranges His Diet to Ensure They Remain Perfectly Intact and Looking Phenomenal.

              

The Narrator’s Fascination at the Age of 62 turns from His Teeth to Those of Various Animals who He comes to Admire for Their Dental Prowess. The Narrator decides to Build His Own set of Customized Dentures made from a Selection of Different Animals. The Animal Dentures are a Labor of Love and are finally Completed when the Narrator is 70.

Then at 71….Well You’ll have to Watch and See For Yourself.

Enjoy.

Thanks For Watching,

Brought to You  By

  Les Sober & FYB 

(Ptd 12:53am)

Lollipop Chainsaw Ep. 1 The Beginning and The End Look The Same

Why is that fucking alarm going apeshit?!

I’m strapped in a fucking seat, Why am I restrained?!  Goddamnit if I squint I can’t really see shit?!

Where the hell am I and how the hell did I end up here?! I can’t remember shit. Fuck Me I bet I have a serious concussion just my fucking luck as usual.

Alright I think I can make out a control panel of some sort lit up like Las Vegas suffering a Cocaine Psychosis.

I haven’t a clue what the fuck its for so fuck it.

There was a brief reprieve from the chaotic hell that I found myself  in a brief moment of clarity.

I realized that I was more or less fucked.

The actual question at hand is how fucked am I?!

Prepare for the fucking WORST?

Who the fuck was that and what do they know that I damn well don’t?!!

Worst of what? Worse than what? What is the possible Worst here?!

Holy  Shit I’m not alone.

I need to figure out pretty fucking quick if thats a good or a bad fucking thing.

Oh shit theres a door, wait, its a hatch in the ceiling  like on a Space Craft or some shit like that.

Also it appears this thing is made of metal.

I’m pretty fucking sure NASA doesn’t use metal as a building material in any of it Project, too fucking heavy.

Could this thing be from a Ship possibly a Naval Ship?! I got to get the fuck out of this thing.

How the hell do I detach this seat belt thing and get free?! Theres got to be a release button or some switch, but where the fuck is it located at for fuck’s sake.

OH COME THE FUCK ON!

WHERE IS IT?! WHERE IN THE NAME OF ALL THINGS FUCKED IS IT GODDAMNIT TO HELL!

What the fuck is grabbing me like some cracked out Kraken?!

FUCK!  I wish I had a weapon, at least a goddamn pocket knife.

Remember if shit goes down hit first, and hit hard.

Oh fuck its some strange Guy grappling with the seat belt deal to free me.

Jesus I’m sure happy as hell for this Guy whoever he is.

Goddamnit he’s run into a problem getting me free, keeps tugging and making unhappy grunting noises.

Come on GUY GODDAMNIT!

Help get me out of this fucking chair now before something else fucked up happens!

“Come on we need to evacuate this piece of shit.”

Who the fuck is this Guy to give me fucking orders?!

I don’t him from a fucking whole in the ground.

Fuck it. I have no idea what to do so may as well follow this Guy’s lead for now.

Ok he’s going to open the hatch in the roof of this Iron Bubble or whatever this thing is we’re in.

This has got to be fucking NASA accept the fact neither of us are wearing Space Suits so I don’t know.

Goddamnit this shit sucks so bad.

. Alright he got the hatch open.

Fuck where is something to grab onto to so I can hoist myself out?!

Ok OK theres some basic ladder system on the opposite site, like a pool ladder. Time to get the fuck out of here.

Now how do I get the hell off the top of this contraption, right theres the ladder down.

I wonder where exactly we are, but more over what the fuck is here with us.

What fucking time is it?!

From the daylight its either the ass crack of dawn or the darker end of dusk.

Right theres the ladder down.

I can’t make out any damn details everything is a solid black silhouette.

Theres a bank of trees presumably a forrest on my left, and a large body of water to my right.

ITS too large to be a Pond or average  Lake.

Where the hell did that Guy go?!

There he is just standing over there like some sort of asshole.

This fucking Guy is going to be a real fucker to deal with I’m sure of it.

Well I guess its time to introduce ourselves and I guess I’ll have to walk over to him.

Damn I walking on sand, black sand at that. Its beginning to make my fucking legs ache like a son of a bitch.

I’ll wave first and see if this Guy turns around and sees me.

There we go he sees me.

The fucking Guy is looking right at me walking over, waving, and he’s still just standing there like some sort of fucking dick.

Oh good looks likes he’s about to say something. Can’t wait to hear this bullshit.

ok so he’s saying we need to find the Others IF their still alive before we all DIE.

Other who? People? Crew? Both I would assume?

Oh what the hell is going on?!

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! REALLY?!

DIdn’t we almost die just now?!

We just narrowly survived some sort of emergency escape without dying, and now this dick is telling me were right back in danger of dying?!

I’m afraid this is going to get very strange fast.

Look For Lollipop Chainsaw Ep.2 This Fucking Guy COMING SOON.

Thanks for Reading,

Les Sober