Tag: narrator

I KNOW I’M A FOOL

Welcome to Today’s FYB Post I KNOW I’M A FOOL By Content Creator know as Burden. Burden Claims Their Work as “For those who are no longer human. For those who can’t relate. Videos range from unruly despair to unrecognized rage. Deprived Visions.” Who or Whom Burden is remains to be seen, but Here’s a would be Rundown of this Obscure Channel. Burden is a Small Channel that has a Collection of Strange/Unexplained/Mysterious Videos that could Possibly be an ARG, an Art Project, Gorilla Advertising, or Just the Crazy fucking shit Spewing from Someone Who forgot to take Their fucking Medication. We Don’t give a Fuck if Burden is Actually Ingenious or Absolutely Insane, But We fucking Do Enjoy Their Work a Good Bit that’s for Sure.

I KNOW I’M A FOOL basically can be Broken Down into 3 Parts The Beginning, The Middle, and Yeah the fucking End. The Beginning showcases Gothic Themes like it was Filmed in Some fucking Graveyard somewhere it’s just Painfully Cliche is all (it SERIOUSLY reminds Us of a Countless Number of Student Art Films/Projects is All). The Audio is Much More interesting as it’s Narrated by What Sounds like an Old British Man Who Sounds like He is Waxing Poetically during what could be a Lecture of Some sort on Life Lessons or fucking Philosophy on the Human Condition but We don’t rightfully fucking Know.

The Middle is Black and White Footage of What Appears to be a Woman on a fucking Bus as if She was on a Security Camera because the Distorted Footage is Reminiscent of Something Recored on/by CCTV. Then Following that There is Rather Random Stock Footage of Old Historical Trains with Coal Burning Steam Locomotives at the Helm. For Once in One of these Weird fucking Fringe Videos the Audio ACTUALLY fucking Matches the Visual as during the Train Footage the Audi is just a Recording of the Industrial Sounds of a Moving Train. The Trains Aren’t Passenger Trains as there No Passenger Cars or at Least We Didn’t fucking See any and We watched this Shit Over and Over So there’s That. These Trains Appear to be Freight Trains with Box/Stock Cars (The Train Cars that fucking Hobo’s Used to Hitch a Ride on)

The Final or Ending Part of the Video is a Simple fucking Visual of a Blue fucking Sky and fucking White Clouds that Sort of Blurry Together over Time. The Audio is the Old British Bastard but this Time around there is a Distinct fucking Echo wherever He’s Speaking. We instantly;y Associated the Echo with a Cathedral or Extremely Large Church as if this Guy is Delivering a fucking Sunday Sermon or some shit though God, Jesus, or Specific Religion is NOT MENTIONED OR REFERENCED. And for that We are more than fucking Grateful because NOTHING fucks Up a Potentially Bad Ass Video than Religious Preaching, Testifying, Promotion, Rhetoric, or Fanaticism. Best to Leave Religion Well Out of It because Honestly if there is a God We’re Sure He/She/It Could Care fucking Less about it.

FYI the Last Line of Dialogue is fucking Killer.

 

 

It is What it Is,

  Presented By Les Sober  

Lollipop Chainsaw Ep. 3 : Bullets For Breakfast Cafe Serves Up Hot Lead Hotcakes

Thank God We’ve made it to the Godforsaken Peninsula.

The Wannabe Leader Guy was right there appears to be 3 other people at least they look like fucking People.

Wait what the fuck was that familiar sound?! HOLY SHIT Their fucking shooting at us the fucking Dicks!!

Thats one hell of a fucking Hello. Shit, Shit, Shit gotta find cover quick! Theres nothing decent to duck behind goddamnit.

Ah Ha looks like a rather large fallen Tree trunk, that shit will have to work. Logs fucking SUCK. They barely provide the needed cover, but there so fucking low to the ground that You have to basically lay flat on your back or stomach to fucking protect Yourself.

Oh come on what the fuck is with this Guy He followed me which lets fucking face it was the best move, BUT the fucker dove behind the fucking Log like We’re in some sort of fucking Action Movie. Heres a tip for Him and thats HE’S NO JASON STATHAM thats for fucking sure.

The dumb son of a bitch literally didn’t look be for He fucking Leapt, and the  stupid bastard landed squarely on Me. Goddamn Dude is heavy as hell yet he seems fit as fuck. He’s gotta be all fucking muscle with out an ounce of body fat or some shit like that. Goddamn.

Huh looks like the 3 other People have taken cover hunkered down in the crevices between the Large assortment of Boulders that run down the entire length of the fucking Peninsula.

Apparently I was wrong, They are in fact NOT shooting at us, but rather They’re being shot at as well. So WHO THE HELL IS shooting at us remains to be seen.

The Bullets aren’t coming from the Jungle behind us, and it isn’t the Other 3 People We saw, and so Whoever is Attacking Us They’re shooting at Us from the Water at Us. SO what They fuck are They some fucking Mermaid Militia?!!

The “wish I was leader” dude is about to poke his head up and see if he can see anything pertinent. Hope He doesn’t get shot in the fucking face, of the fucking top of His fucking head gets blown off leaving His brain exposed.

Alright He was successful! I can hardly fucking hear Him even though He’s laying right fucking next to Me. Whoever is firing at us seems to upgraded Their Weaponry.

We gotta do something as this fucking Log is getting Shredded like a big old piece of fucking Cheese, and I sure as fuck don’t want to get ventilated like a I was made of Swiss fucking Cheese either goddamnit.

Time to cash in on the flight or fight principle and utilize the sudden Adrenaline rush surging like Rocket fucking Fuel through My veins. I don’t know about the other Guy, but I’m going to make a B-Line to the Boulders like the Others.

I’m going to tap this Guy on the shoulder or some shit, point words the Boulders, looks at him and then the rocks several times real quick, and then I bolting out from behind whats left of this fucking Log.

Here it goes. Good got His attention and He acknowledged My plan. Nothing left but to haul ass and hope not to get fucking killed in the process.

FUUUUUUUCK!!! The fucking bullets are whistling past Me WAY TOO CLOSE for any comfort. The fucking sand is getting riddled with Bullets sending sizable geysers of sand exploding upwards as it gets pounded by the The Enemy’s Artillery.

I have to see the motherfuckers firing at Us at least if I’m going to die for fucks sake. Alright running like hell and looking left. What the fuck is going on?!! Looks to me like 6 smaller Sailing Vessels sailing like a Flock of Canadian Geese Fly. There’s The Leader out front, and the rest of the “Flock” Flying behind The Leading Goose  in a Triangle Formation.

The Boulders are only a few feet in front of me now almost there, I’m going to make it by God. THANK FUCK I’m finally holed up in a narrow space in-between a couple of the Boulders like its Trench fucking Warfare.

Where the fuck is that other Guy I was with. There He is Goddamnit still half way out on the goddamn Beach. The fucking fool must have paused before following Me, and now He’s in serious trouble.

Ok at least He’s keeping his head down trying to lower himself as far down as he can, and now He’s Zig Zagging like a Zipper with ADHA on Cocaine.

SHIT! He’s never going to make it! Oh God these unknown fuckers just broke out Their Heaviest Artillery and are unloading like theres no fucking sorrow, OH CHIRST HE GOT FUCKING SHOT!!!

Fucking hell He wasn’t so much shot as He was torn the fuck apart, obliterated  into a Confetti of Flesh. Jesus He’s in pieces, well more like bloody chunks of Meat.

I have to make contact with the Others. I wonder where Their finding around here, how close are We to each other?!

Tune In Next Time For

LollyPop Chainsaw Episode 4: Fate In The Forrest

Thanks for Reading,

By Les Sober