Tag: Personal Experience

Go Home Hunter Boy Before You Get Hurt

If anyone has any doubt that I Love my Wife too No End Yesterday Proved it beyond any and all reasonable doubt. For those that know me what I’m about to say next is Far Beyond Bizarre, but My Wife has a variety of Holiday projects/Crafts for the kids in our Family that both required the same exact component Pine Cones. Yes I fucking went on a walk with my Wife to collect the very much needed Pine Cones.

There is a dirt road behind our backyard that separates our neighborhood from the neighborhood that neighbors ours (say the shit 5 times fast). The dirt road since it was built has been designated as a Public Road. This is due to the fact people use it for a wide assortment of reasons. Golf carts putter back down that road with little trailers filled with limbs or logs that the driver intends on dumping. There People who walk down the road doing the nature thing, kids use it to cut through between the two neighboring neighborhoods, People walk there dogs on that road, Trucks towing boats/small rv’s/ATVs use that road either to assist in getting there boat or whatever out of their backyards or as an access road to go between both neighborhoods visiting friends/family. Point being it is a rather well used road.

My Wife and I exited the backyard (deciding to leave the Our Big Backyard Dwelling Dogs at Home as walking them is a real labor of love) and proceeded down the road Pine Cone collection bags in hand. While you walk on the road you can see right into the residents backyards and can see the trails they have made to move recreational toys (ATVS, Boats Etc.). The woods separating the two said neighborhoods is like a small, narrow Triangle thats narrowest point is behind our house and as you travel the woods on both side of the road thicken to a decent degree.

After walking around five minutes I saw something on the right next to the side of the road (No not Puppies and that for those who know that reference was a different dirt road) that honestly exclaim “What The Fuck?!” it was so utterly insane for me to see. Here I must mention it is still Deer Hunting Season and what I saw lying buy the side of the road was a Deer Baiting Area. A Deer Baiting area is simply a small clearing usually near the hunters blind (A ladder with a small seat attached to the top that gives the hunter the advantage of height over their pray) and consists of only one other thing outside of a clearing, and thats Corn. Hunters can buy 25 to 50 pound bags of Livestock Corn (for animal feed, not human consumption) on the Cob which they then dump in a large pile in the clearing. The Hunter then retreats to his/her hunting blind to wait for hungry Deer to come by for a bite to eat at which point the Hunter shoots them (Not very sporting you ask me the gun toting camouflaged assholes) There was a sapling growing approximately 3 feet back from the piled corn that had a Trap Camera. They are the cameras that hunters strap to trees that have motion sensors so when anything enters the cameras view it will automatically take photos. This way hunters can see if their animals around that area worth hunting.

My first instinct was to 1) Piss all over the corn rendering it useless for baiting Deer and 2) Ironically to take my big old hunting knife and cutting the camera down. I then would of course take it with me to teach this Massive Moron that hunting SO fucking close to people is a common sense issue, and if this ignorant ass idiot doesn’t have any or is not using their common sense then I’d help them figure it out so to speak.

Now not only was it shocking to see the such monumental stupidity, but on top of hunting on a well used PUBLIC road in-between to large, populated neighborhoods (where kids play, parents do lawn work and grandparents sit on the porch throughout the lazy country days.) the Deer Baiting area was only a mere 100 feet from one of the off shoots that people use for their aforementioned recreational toys. These off shoots lead right into someones backyard or directly behind several house’s backyards as these are the established unofficial travel/transportation paths.

My Wife managed to talk me down and I left the hunters spot and gear undamaged still reeling from the sheer fucking stupidity of said hunter. We walked another several blocks down the dirt road until we inadvertently ran into the actual Hunter. At this point I must interject that I grew up in Sleezy North, spent the last 13 years in the Great Southern Swamp, and spending 10 years as a Hardcore Drug Dealing Drug Addict have been exposed to all kinds of weapons and the madness wielding them. Due to this this fact this hunter has a rifle didn’t phase me in the least. In all honestly in came down to one thing in particular and thats the “3 feet Rule” which dictates if someone one has a rifle  1) You have a knife/weapon/good with your fists     2) MORE IMPORTANTLY if your within a 3 foot radius the hunter can’t get his gun up, aimed and fired before your onto of them with your knife in their fucking neck.

The hunter emerged from the left side of the road about 15 feet infant of us and then proceeded to walk directly at us with his rifle in a resting position across his belly. I was already well pissed off so I wasn’t about to take any shit from this fuck. See Hunters are EXTREMELY TERRITORIAL and EXTREMELY PROTECTIVE of their hunting grounds. This means that if you accidentally wonder onto private land and come across the owner hunting you’ll get one of two reactions. The first if its a younger hunter they’ll be rude, agitated and loud when they inform you of your mistake. The second is if its an older hunter they will be strict but fair in that they’ll let you know they aren’t happy that you showed up on their land (especially while hunting), BUT will be polite enough not to rant and rave and will instruct you to leave their land ASAP and not return.

The hunter was a young guy, about 5′ 8″, 140-150 pounds, intensely blonde almost white hair poking out from under his hunting cap. He was cloaked in camo and was carrying a black .22 caliber hunting rifle. Like I said younger hunters can be pricks and this guy seemed to be a petty prick. No hello or anything the hunter demanded to know what we were doing. This is a PUBLIC road so as far as I was concerned he had no rights hunting or otherwise so I walked up to him stopping short of a foot from his face, and answered “Picking Fucking Pine Cones.” in my deep dead pan manner while staring intently at the hunter. No one in the Southern Country curses while in the presence of others so my barrage of foul and aggressive swearing confused the hunter who seemed to find the whole obscenity thing unnerving.

The hunter responded that we were messing up his hunting by walking down the road spooking all the possible prey that he could kill. My Wife called him out on the fact this is a PUBLIC ROAD and the Hunter looked at the ground and sort of shook his head. I jumped in and demanded to know that if we had accidentally walked onto his land then he should be able to show me the property line. I continued that I find it very strange that his family hadn’t set up signifiers along said property line allowing others to distinguish between public and private land. The usual and accepted way to do this is by  Posting “Private Property: NO Trespassing, Hunting, Fishing or Dumping (garbage)” on trees approximately 15 feet apart along the ENTIRE property line. Also there bright neon ties that are fashioned  around trunks off trees along the property line as another signifier of private property. Lastly since this was a road there would be a gate of some sort blocking off the part of the road that fell on private property. I asked the hunter why there was none of these and he couldn’t obviously answer being the fact he was fucking lying through his fucking teeth, and I wanted to let him know he was fucked because he couldn’t bullshit us.

I then addressed the fact that he was hunting in EXTREMELY Proximity to people that it was equal to hunting in their backyard. I then asked how the fuck he’d feel if his stupidity got a kid/person/elderly person wounded or killed because of his GROSS INCOMPETENCE. Again the hunter remained speechless. I asked if he had an actual hunting permit, what his family name was (to verify if it was in some sort of way his family’s private land) and while I was interrogating the hunter relentlessly I made sure to stand no farther than a foot away. I also made sure to stay standing to his side in his blind spot. I did this because when he looked at my Wife he had to take his eyes off me to the point where he couldn’t see me even in his peripherals, and as you may image makes people quite nervous as it did this Hunter.

I suppose they hunters plan was to try and act all authoritarian with us and try and intimidate us by bullshitting that this was his/his family private property, and that combined with a rifle in hand should have been enough to run us off if you will. Needless to say then that this was not a response he ever thought he’d get. The little shit then asks us to please leave by walking the rest of the road until it emptied into part of my neighborhood instead of back tracking which would have been a 5 minute walk for us. Some people could call me paranoid others could call me safe, but I agreed to exit the hunters way though it was a huge fucking inconvenience because I didn’t want the little shit to know where I live.

We exited the wooded road and walked all the way home. As we approached our house I had an idea. While crossing the lawn I fetched my car keys from my pocket and walked directly to my Jeep. I got in my Jeep drove it down the dirt road a few blocks and then laid on my horn like a New Yorker possessed by a insane fit of road rage insuring there wouldn’t be a single fucking chipmunk left in the wood for the hunter to hunt thus fucking up the rest of his hunting day.

Thanks For Reading,

Les Sober  

The Final Fn Chapter of The Great Southern Swamp

Well here is the last pertinent update.

We had a Buyer come poking their nose around inquiring about purchasing our Old Home Office, but their offer was shall we say Crackhead Price. Instead of telling them what I thought (that they could fuck the hell off with their insultingly insulting offer) and did the practical thing and we countered their shit offer. They responded by babbling some bullshit and walked away from the deal like the fucking vultures their are.

A few weeks later we got a call from our real-estate agent informing us that the initial buyers were back with a new offer, but the sons of bitches put a Firm Offer (No Negotiating meaning no countering) with the answer due by 5 pm that day. I read the email which our Agent sent containing the new offer, the twats came up $2,000. We wrote our Agent and this time I did tell him what I thought in full. The so called Buyers tried to low ball the living shit out of us then walked only to come back again. I told the Agent this is a bullshit tactic (they walked and waited before coming back hoping extra stress, and growing feeling desperation might of clouded our judgement allowing them to virtually steal the property.) and the $2,000 increase is utterly pointless so please go tell the bitch ass Buyers No Counter. This time We walked away from the deal.

At last the bastard Buyers came back a third time upping their offer buy another $3,000 (thats $5,000 total at this point) but then with drew their offer on;y to replace it with an actually decent offer, not the greatest mind you but it wasn’t insulting. We calculated what our savings would be (the goddamn office in The Swamp turning into a Murphy’s Law cluster fuck one added expense after another after another and so on) plus our Home Office Insurance companies refund check for the rest of this year (we are cancelling our Insurance and have found a far better company to work with here in The Southern Country) and the check for some repairs they had mailed us and decided the math worked out to our satisfaction. We alerted our Realtor that we accepted the terms of and price of purchase. The Buyer scheduled an inspection the very next day which went well. Also the Buyers offer was All Cash eliminating the worst threat to a real-estate deal the fucking Bank(s). Not to mention it greatly decreases the ton of red tape, and endless fucking paperwork that comes with dealing with a bunch of Bankers. We close in 11 days and can’t wait for the sale to be over once and for fucking all. All left to do now is sort out the various purchasing paper work, we aren’t even going to the closing we opted to do it via email/internet.

I can’t tell you how absolutely elated I am to severe the last rancid tie to that God Awful Swamp and its batshit residents. I feel for the first time that things are back on track and our planned expansion is indeed now possible.

So come on back and Keep your Eyes Open.

Thanks for the Read as Always,

Les Sober

Last Voicemail Message from SpaceDog Transcribed by Les Sober

Welcome

It was an autumn night. The year 1994. I was 16. I remember this night for it was my first introduction to the ‘gay community’. It was my first night at a gay bar. The people I was with told I was at the ‘Little Roxy’ (in New Brunswick, NJ maybe?).

As I walked in, I took in the room. The first thing I noticed were the stares. The first thing I felt was the hand of an intoxicated man grabbing my ass. It was immediate uncomfortablity. I was offered a drink but I just wanted to get out. I did eventually.

We proceeded to go to Roxy in New York. I was in awe. At first I loved it, then it struck me as odd, then it struck me as love again. I noticed everybody being really gropey to one another. Then the people I was with (a much older sampling of men probably mostly over 40) all started kissing together in a circle. I, being in the city on their pursestrings, joined. It was all odd in the long run, then I was taken home, snuck in my window, and went on with my regular life.

Looking back at this specifically it just strikes me as odd how this group of friends would all get tongue twisted like that. I shouldn’t judge really, I’ve hooked up with a friend or two in my days but it was basically my first impression.

On my eighteenth birthday, I was ostracized by my closest gay friend for not wanting to go out to a club. I wanted to be around my straight friends and for this I was condemned and condoned.

‘Why would you want to be around straight people?’ You can’t get any cock with them!’, he viciously barked at me.

My simple reply was,’Life is not just about sex. It is about being around people that I enjoy the company of whether they are straight or gay.’ Sadly this wasn’t the only time I heard this from a fellow gay.

Prelude to a F*** OFF

Before I begin this section I just want to state that I have had fun at gay bars and clubs in the past. I have also had fun while being stranded in snow storms along the side of the road and have had fun while being searched by the police. I even have had fun with someone after suicide attempt. Does this make me sick and twisted? More then likely yes. I adapt to the cards I am dealt on a given occasion and try to make the best of things. We aren’t always dealt a great hand and even when we are there are infinite ways we can screw it up (and vice versa).

F*** OFF!!!!!!!!!!

I am completely tired of how gay people act as a whole. Sure as a ‘community’ we can band together and protest things like prop 8 which I am proud of, yet the remander of the time we tear one another apart.

I choose not to part of a ‘community’ wear all that is praised is vanity, clothing labels, and how many cocks we can suck. I choose not to be a part of something where self centeredness reigns queen supreme. Where narcassism is considered a positive attribute and altruism is a red flag for let’s take advantage of him. Where people not conforming to the majority are made to feel like a right wing nut job at an Obama rally.

And nearly fifteen years after my first experience with the ‘community’ I have realized nothing has changed. It is all just still a big meat market, devoid of morals, devoid of much more then what can you do for me now. I don’t really expect more and never have or will. It is what it is.

On a personal note, I have noticed that things such as honesty, whether about yourself or someone else is chopped down to an unacceptable level.

Nine times out of ten when I tell someone that I have epilepsy they suddenly look at me differently like I have eight legs or they want me to have a seizure like, ‘HERE SPARKY BARK SPARKY’ F*** SPARKY!!!

I tell them I think Britney Spears, Ashley Simpson, Miley Cyrus and their legion of doom can all go suck my cock and that I like a lot more rock music and that the music playing in this club makes me to shoot myself in the head, they are either personally affronted or think I literally want to shoot myself in the head. Like I’m gonna go out like Kurt Cobain or Layne Staley and off myself just because I listen to their music.

 

When someone asks my opinion, I do not sugar coat it. I tell it like it is. I do not hang in close surroundings with people I detest. People are so offended by bluntness and honesty because the truth hurts.

Would you rather be lied to all your life by people you think are your friends or would you rather be told the truth by your enemies? Lest we forget the old saying:, ‘Keep your friends close but your enemies even closer.’

A lot of people who portray themselves as genuine will stab you in the back in front of their friends. Some people will simply reveal their true colors over time.

Which is why I simply say F*** OFF to the ‘gay community’ and for those of you fed up as well, welcome to my gay revolution.

Asshole Amy’s Rip Off Recommendation

As you all are readily aware we have moved our Home Offices and now I must sell our old Home Offices. The reason f-yourblog.com has yet to “relaunch and evolve” itself if you will is I’m having a shit time trying to unload the Offices. The following is a PRIME EXAMPLE of some of the inane to the insane shit I’ve been dealing with Every Day for 3 weeks or more.

Here’s the set up:

One of the easy fixes was a window in our office had a cracked pane of glass so we were going to replace it obviously before we had the property listed, and remember we are many state lines away. Our useless representation (earning the moniker Asshole) Amy recommended a window repair service called WINDOW DOCTOR.

Now its important at this to point out for the first time in f-yourblog.com’s brief history I have used a place/person/location/company by their REAL NAME, But after read the rest of this story I assure you will understand I wanted this piece to do double duty as a Warning to All Readers AND Consumers alike. Now back to the story.

 

Following the direction of our previous and shitty representative I scheduled WINDOW DOCTOR to come out to repair an easy fix. I should have realized how screwed up this situation is when WINDOW DOCTOR showed up to the job A DAY LATE. The Tech noticed a slight buldge at the bottom right corner of the window. He then informed our Rep.’s Personal Assistant.

We get our rep.’s PA’s report that evening that stated the Tech saw said buldge and being the Great Southern Swamp suspected there was some water damage issue (i.e. Window Leak issue), and couldn’t tell how bad the suspected water damage was.  He said he would report this finding to his employer WINDOW DOCTOR and then WINDOW DOCTOR would take it from there.

At the last possible minute on Friday 20 minutes before they close for the weekend WINDOW DOCTOR called my Wife at 4:40pm. Whoever the scumbag on the other end of the phone was claimed to definitively know the problem (again without doing a single diagnostic test) was and that they could fix it for us. The Scumbag went on to say that the entire exterior wall was rotted to hell and would have to be torn down, completely reframed and then rebuilt to the tune of $9,000.

IMEDDIATELY a HUGE Red Flag shot up on my never failing Bullshit Meter. So I did the practical and logical I called for a 2nd and even a 3rd estimates (Due to the fact I trust next to no one). I also called other Window/Home Construction Companies over the weekend, and explain the horrendous pile of Horse Shit I was told by WINDOW DOCTOR. To NO SURPRISE WHAT SO EVER They all unanimously agreed that was one of the stupidest (not to mention shadiest) things they had ever heard, and recommended NOT USING WINDOW DOCTOR.

The 2nd and 3rd estimates came back virtually the same, there was NO STRUCTURAL DAMGE as The Wall was intact and free from wood rot or water damage. The entire window and window frame would need to be replaced due to a leak. Right at the base of the window where the water had trickled in would need to be fixed BUT THAT WAS IT. I asked them both what they would charge me to fix the problem at hand. The answer was…..drum roll please………$2,300 four times LESS (thats over $6,500 less) than WINDOW DOCTOR because there was NO INTERIOR DAMAGE TO THE WALL, All Damage was deemed SUPERFICIAL.

Me being Me I couldn’t let it end there I was pissed off about the whole WINDOW DOCTOR estimate that had been proven to be absolutely BULLSHIT. If your thinking the next thing I did was call WINDOW DOCTOR Directly then Your Right.

See I had put a few things together. First WINDOW DOCTOR lied to me which was in fact an attempt to commit fraud. Second thing was the fact that WINDOW DOCTOR had called so close to closing on Friday especially when their closed on weekends. Based on the time of the call it was apparent they were using basic fear tactics, call last minute, report some serious shit, and then let them sit and stew about it all weekend. The desired affect is to have the Mark to panic, which they figured would work even better on an out of state owner. It Didn’t. In Fact as you can see their plan was failing as well as back firing.

I decided to use the “Hi! I’m Joe Public, I don’t know anything on the topic of window repair, So your saying” strategy to dupe the Scam Artist into thinking I was a viable target, and then trapping them in their own lies while playing The Fool. The first question I asked was how did they know so much about such extensive structural problem(s) without doing ANY diagnostics? The woman’s replay was “Because I’ve been in the Business 25 years” so I replied to her by stating the fact ANYONE could do ANYTHING for 25 years like say I was a Professional Bowler. I could bowl 25 years, BUT that doesn’t mean I’m on the Champion Circuit all decked out in Endorsements. After 25 years I could still suck and be struggling at the bottom of any ranking system.

The Woman then (like a truly guilty person) immediately got extremely defensive. She started feeding me equally idiotic company propaganda such as “We hire only the best tech/use the best products etc.” I then told her I had NEVER heard of WINDOW DOCTOR before, never done business with them (neither did anyone else I contacted on this subject) and in all honesty didn’t actually hire them (Asshole Amy did since WINDOW DOCTOR was HER recommendation that turned out to be a 3 ring shit show) At this point I had this woman so flustered because I wasn’t falling for her well rehearsed con artist line of crap, and was staying toe to toe with her until she was backed into a corner. The woman AGAIN like a VERY GUILTY PERSON does she handed the phone off to a Field Tech. It turned out the Tech Named ANDY was the same son of a bitch that did the wrote up the initial report.

This Sack of Shit tries to convince me of one of the most RIDICULOUS LIE I have heard in a long, long time. ANDY tells me the reason the estimate was $9,000 wasn’t so much the actual due to the cost of materials. ANDY continued telling me that they have to buy their supplies in bulk, and if their only doing one office then ALL their LEFTOVER BULK ORDERED MATERIALS would be useless as in they couldn’t use them for any other jobs.

Just then I suddenly figured the scam out, and it was time to go for the this jackass’s jugular.

I stopped ANDY in the middle of whatever drivel he was babbling about and addressed what he had told me. I told ANDY that it had become quite obvious ANDY and his employer WINDOW DOCTOR where attempting to get me to agree to a fake problem. That way WINDOW DOCTOR would bank the actually REAL REPAIR PRICE of $2,300 and then take the additional $6,500 Plus to buy supplies on MY DIME. I then proceeded to tell ANDY that his lie was AN OBVIOUS LIE, what am I supposed to believe? Am I supposed to believe that right after WINDOW DOCTOR finished the repair that what? The nails would instantly rust? The wood suddenly is ravaged by termites? The massive roll of tar paper would disintegrate? WHAT A LOAD OF SHIT. I ended the conversation at that point with a “Well Fuck You Andy and your Bullshit Employers for trying to exploit their customers.”

The Moral of this story is Don’t Blindly Trust anyone Especially a Large Company.

ALWAYS get a 2nd opinion.

Don’t Take Shit from Scam Artists.

Fight Back against Scumbag Scam Artists and Conartists.

Thanks For Reading

Les “Than” Sober

 

Our Exodus From The Great Southern Swamp Once & For All

As all these stories start we woke at dawn (or the ass crack off dawn for my fellow non morning friends) and proceeded to try to drink Dunkin Doughnuts out of coffee. We had to wait until 11 am before we could pick up the small army of Uhaul trailers the reason being our Slumlord wouldn’t allow us to park the vehicles in the parking lot overnight like an asshole. So we set out to finish “Tidying Up” and do last minute patching, painting and deep cleaning while we waited. I don’t personally have the patience to wait which is why I hate waiting. Patience is a virtue I was born without.

Finally we get the Uhauls lined up out front of the office and for the next 4 hours did nothing but load the trucks up one after the other. We then packed up our office animal and put rubber to asphalt. Just our luck The Great Southern Swamp had one more fuck you for us as we made our final escape. The entire east side of The Great Southern Swamp was hit with a series of brutal tropical storms. The storms were so intense you couldn’t see the tail lights of the car 6 feet in front of you thus slowing down our progress severely. After battling the tropical storms for almost 8 hours we crossed the state line leaving the Great Southern Swamp looming in our review mirrors.

The rest of the trip to the Southern Country went relatively smooth in spite of god knows how many fueling stops, bathroom breaks and other minor difficulties. We reached our new home office (which since moving have decided to dub “The Black Lodge” a tribute to the band Anthrax, what I told you I’m older than dinosaur shit?!) a little past 3 am and were needless to say exceptionally glad to have reached our destination and get the hell off the road. As we started to unload My Wife suddenly informed me the only key we had was missing. We stumbled around road weary and some what sleep deprived (everyone was excited about the move so no one really got any thing resembling actual sleep) looking in vain for the lost key. It was the brought to my attention there was a back up emergency key stashed about 30 minutes away. Not thrilled in the least my Wife and I got in our car, leaving the kids (staff) and critters on the front porch of The Black Lodge. Once we reached the house where our emergency key was at we had to enter the code given to us by the owner to shut off the security alarm. Needless to say in our delirious state we instead of shutting the alarm off we set it off. I can not begin to describe the sound this alarm made it was not only deafening (even with your fingers in your ears so far their tickling your brain) and disorienting in it self. It was so insanely loud we actually could think coherently, it was like the kind of shit the police/military/government agencies do when they blast music to end a standoff.

I managed to hold my shit together long enough to clock the alarm company’s phone number off the alarm box and ran across the street to call them. The alarm company was cool as shit and the problem was taken care of, well that one at least. My Wife then went in to retrieve our emergency key and I shit you not it wasn’t there. I then tried to contact the owner which took awhile being at that point it was around quarter to 4 in the morning. I did catch up with the owner in the end who then informed me they had our key with them. The only issue with that was the owner was on vacation in motherfucking Las Vegas which obviously left us high and dry.

With no other option my Wife and I got back in the car once again and headed back to The Black Lodge. Once we arrived we informed the Kids (Staff) we would be sleeping in the same vehicles we were so happy to get out of in the first fucking place. Fortunately that would only translate to approximately 4 hours or so because it turned out our contractor still had a copy of our key which we retrieved at 8:30 am the next day.

All in All it seems like a fitting end to our chapter in The Great Southern Swamp and our the start of our new chapter here in The Southern Country.

Thanks for Reading,

Les Sober

 

Your Health Insurance is Financially Raping You To Death

The Fairytale History of Health Insurance:

Health Insurance would provide a service where the client sends in Monthly checks for your entire life. When the client needs, Hospitalization, Surgery, ER Emergency, Illness, Doctor Visits, Specialists, Medications etc. the insurance company uses the clients money to cover any medical issue. Of course the Health Insurance Companies would charge a reasonable fee for their services since they deal directly with your doctors and medical institutions.

What The Hell Happened?

Health Insurance Companies realized the more money the refused to pay the richer they became, and they sold their souls to the Deity of the Dollar.    The Health Insurance Companies started restricting its coverage, constantly increasing rates, and finding ways TO NOT PAY YOUR CLAIM.

Health Insurance Companies employ a whole fucking department of people who’s only job is to review client claims and FIND ANY REASON/LOOPHOLES so your Healthcare Provider WON’T HAVE TO PAY YOUR CLAIM, essentially doing the opposite of its intended purpose.

Seriously the Health Insurance’s business model wouldn’t work for any other business because people wouldn’t use it and it’d go bankrupt. What other industry or company or product maker raises their prices periodically all year, every year WHILE REDUCING THE SERVICES.

Would you tolerate your local grocery store say constantly increasing the price of Milk for instance and at the same time giving you less milk for your money. If your grocer continued raising the price of a gallon of Milk from today’s current price of $2.25 up to$3.75 ,and then a month later to $6.00 and then $7.99 next month and so on all year long. BUT not only is your grocer raising the price but SIMULTANEOUSLY your grocer would be giving less Milk for the Money. See as the price goes up you’d get less Milk at first it be just a little under a gallon then 2/3 of a gallon, and then only half a gallon at newly inflated GALLON Milk prices.

Then there’s The Deductible which is one of the greatest and greediest scams in Health Insurance History. The deductible works as follows. You pay a set amount of money out of your own pocket for your medical care WHILE SENDING A CHECK EVERY MONTH TO YOUR HEALTH INSURANCE PROVIDER. Can you say “Legal Double Billing”?! That be the equivalent of taking your car to your mechanic and he makes you fix the car yourself (using your labor and cash for needed parts) and then giving you a bill for the repair. ITS FUCKING INSANE THAT PEOPLE PUT UP WITH THIS CORRUPT CAPITALISTIC GREED LIKE THIS EVERY DAY.

I will once again use a Bullet Point format for the rest.

  1. My Aunt Ellington needed a hip replacement, and put it off for years in spite of the fact they she had what is considered a good health care provider. She asked me politely not to name the Health Insurance Company and out of respect for her I won’t. She knew the out of pocket would be a significant amount of money. She finally had the surgery and it cost a total of $117,000. Her insurance company paid only $17,000 leaving her with a $100,000 in medical bills, AND THEY STILL WANTED THEIR MONTHY PAYMENTS.
  2. I had a best friend in high school named Brooklyn Billy Bob who I still talk to sporadicly to this day. Right before I met Brooklyn Billy Bob his family had just moved in with his grandmother not by choice but necessity. The family didn’t have a lot of money to speak of. During the long moving process Brooklyn Billy Bob’s dad, who had a serious health issue pertaining to his heart, couldn’t afford his heart medication. As a result Brooklyn Billy Bob’s dad DIED because he couldn’t pay for his LIFE SAVING MEDICATION.
  3. Pharmaceutical companies who work hand in hand with your Health Insurance Company DO NOT CREATE CURES, THEY CREATE CLIENTS. Think for a second on how the Pharmaceutical companies are COMMERCIALIZING YOUR HEALTH FOR PROFIT.
  4. Lets not forget the American Government whose politicians make MILLIONS on Health Insurance and Pharmaceutical companies Lobbyists HAVE INSTATED A $2,500 YEARLY FINE if you DON’T have (lets be honest its if you don’t pay for) Health Insurance.
  5. When I went to rehab for a vicious heroin addiction which SAVED MY LIFE my Doctor had to call/talk to my Health Insurance Provider DAILY because they wanted to booted out asap so they wouldn’t have to pay any more claims. My Doctor had to LIE TO HELP SAVE MY LIFE. Each day my doctor got on the phone with my Health Insurance Provider and had to lie so I didn’t get kicked out because my Health Insurance Provider didn’t want to pay to cover my again LIFE SAVING treatment. My Doctor was smart he knew I COULDN’T be removed from Rehab IF i was either SUICIDAL or HOMICIDAL (the rule is simply you can’t be taken out of treatment for Insurance reasons if your a threat to yourself or others). My Doctor did this dance for 17 days and I did end up getting released early because of the bullshit with my Health Insurance Provider (who ultimately got what they wanted which was ending treatment asap)
  6. EVEN WORSE my Wife is an RN who works in the Drug Addiction field and the Insurance vs. Rehab War continues. Since the dawn of Drug Rehab Health Insurance companies have been trying with all their financial might to DENY ALL ADDICTS LOOKING FOR HELP. The Insurance Companies HATE REHAB because unfortunately addicts relapse and may need more help to stay clean and healthy. Insurance claims this “Revolving Door” of the Rehab field justifies NOT PAYING ANYONES REHAB CLAIMS EVER AGAIN. The war has raged for decades, BUT finally the Insurance Companies have started to win. They have rearranged protocols in their favor. Example there is a treatment evaluation used when a patient is admitted to a rehab that gauges their current physical health from 1-10 with 10 being the worst. The Insurance companies have announced that if a patient comes in to be admitted if their symptoms are 1-5 THEY AREN’T PAYING because in their opinion aren’t in actual need of medical help. They are also making medical institutions write EVER THING in a patients medical chart 3 requiring the ENTIRE treatment teams signatures. This is a way to encourage little mistakes by the staff that the Insurance Companies can then use to DENY THE PATIENT CARE. This will create a massive social problem. If drug addicts can’t get help the keep using, and if they keep using they keep lying, cheating, stealing, robbing and scaring to feed their habit before it ends their life prematurely. Its bad enough our prisons are over crowed due to drug offenses (such as possession) that has created a over crowding situation. This over crowding allows NEW OR REPEAT VIOLENT OFFENDERS being brought into the prison system to be released extremely early because there is no place to put them. The fact is drug addicts should be sentenced to Rehab NOT PRISON, Addiction is called a disease BUT its actually a treatable Metal Disorder.
  7. One thing a that baffles me in the Health Insurance field is they DON’T PROVIDE FERTILITY COVERAGE FOR WOMAN OR MEN. The Insurance Companies will chip in once a woman is pregnant. WHATS WEIRD is Health Insurance Companies are GREEDY AS FUCK so why wouldn’t they cover fertility?! MY POINT if a couple has a kid then the kids going to need Health Insurance and thus get added to their parents policy and then at 18 they have to pay for their own policy. So kids equal customers and customers equal cash.
  8. When I had Hepatitis C which if untreated will end your life painfully and prematurely I saw a Specialist who was a fucking godsend, a miracle in the form of a man. There at the time I was seeking treatment a slew of new and more effective Hep-C drugs hitting the market. It was because the FDA was pumping cash into the Hep-C drugs after they announced the #1 health problem facing America was Liver Transplants. My Doctor researched EVERY drug and decided one a 2 medication combo that had virtually NO SIDE EFFECTS (up till VERY recently the only treatment for Hep-C was Interferon injections which have the identical side effects as Chemotherapy causing a whopping 91% of prior patients to end treatment before completing the course of Interferon ) AND IT COULD CURE HEP-C as opposed to possibly wrestling it into submission like Cancer. Well no surprise my Health Insurance Provider wasn’t at all happy about my treatment plan. My Specialist called my Health Insurance Provider and managed to get them to clear his treatment plan for me by USING THEIR GREED AGAINST THEM. His argument simply was this by biting the bullet and paying for my treatment NOW then I’d live a full lifetime which meant my Health Insurance Provider would continue to get monthly checks much longer. Bottomline Dead People DON’T FUCKING PAY FOR HEALTH INSURANCE HEALTHY PEOPLE DO.
  9. JUST YESTERDAY I went to my local pharmacy to pick up my medication and was told the price was $131.00 when I was paying $10 with my HUMANA Insurance plan. The Pharmacist told me my  HUMANA insurance card expired so I thought it was no big deal I’d just have to order a new one. I called  HUMANA my Insurance Provider as soon as I got home, and the representative informed me my Health Insurance had been CANCELLEd AS OF JANUARY 31ST.. I’ve been with that Insurance company 14-15 years and NEVER missed a single payment. So as you can image I was in a state of shock, awe and serious confusion. I asked the representative why and he proceeded to duck my question for an hour before finally coming up with this statement “HUMANA is NO LONGER providing the plan I was insured under in my area.” I asked him what the fuck that meant as thats not a proper answer and to me made no fucking sense at the time. Again he would answer fully and just kept repeating his “NO LONGER IN YOUR AREA” statement so I hung the fuck up. I immediately called back and asked the second representative the question of what the previous statement meant. She had no problem answering me and said with out a pause “HUMANA IN FACT HAD DECIDED TO NOT INSURE ANYONE ANY MORE IN MY ENTIRE STATE.” This means 100’s of thousands or more people LOST THEIR HUMANA/HUMANA ONE HEALTH INSURANCE COVERAGE BY NO FAULT OF THEIR OWN. Bottomline HUMANA/HUMANA ONE decided to stop providing coverage for the ENTIRE STATE because it was a “High Claims State” and what do Health Insurance Companies hate? Yup PAYING YOUR HEALTH INSURANCE CLAIMS.
  10. SHOP AROUND! While Health Insurance is a Scam based on FEAR and GREED you should opt for the lesser of all the evils, and by evils I mean the Health Insurance Companies. I got dropped by HUMANA due to HUMANA’S GROWING NEED FOR GREED, but in the end I got NEW plan with BLUE CROSS BLUE SHIELD with not only the SAME COVERAGE for LESS MONEY and FULL DENTAL & OPTICAL which I never had with HUMANA/HUMANA ONE.

In Summation the Salvation of Health lies in Social Medicine. I know back in the early days when the American politicians where debating The Affordable Care Act the greedy unethical and immoral GOP launched a propaganda campaign demonizing social medicine. The claims the Republicans made WERE ABSOLUTELY FALSE it was a blatant fear tactic to scare the American public into submission and it worked. Why did it work so well?

Americans believe whatever they hear now a days instead of thinking about them first. A pivotal point in the propaganda was social medicine would increase taxes, BUT IF the American public had stopped and done the math they would easily see the tax would be FAR LESS THEN THE CURRENT PRIVATE HEALTH INSURANCE COVERAGE.

If you remember my Aunt got stuck with $100,000 medical bill AFTER HER HEALTH INSURANCE PAID THEIR PART ($17,000 out of at total cost of $117,000) SO I ask you which costs more a tax increase or a $100,000 medical bill after being fucked over by your Health Insurance Provider?!

Its unAmerican that Capitalism now dictates your health care. You pay or you SUFFER and you pay or you DIE. We have the doctors, facilities, treatments, and medications that could help heal people BUT we will let them SUFFER AND DIE because MONEY IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN PEOPLE.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“If Your Donald Trump’s Assistant Why Do You Drive A Ford Escort?” By Spacedog In His Delightfully Demented Debut

I guess some people just can’t help themselves. Some people just spurt all kinds of lies out of their mouths. I am guilty as well, heck I was caught in a tiny little lie tonight. Some people can lie about much more though. Some lies people tell are funny. Others are mean and there are even a few people that tell the lie even more then they tell the truth.
I once met a rather attractive man. He was from somewhere out on Long Island, I’m not exactly sure where at though. He was 25. So I met him in the city and he wanted to take me out to dinner. OK, why not I thought? He told me he was Donald Trump’s personal assistant. I was young. I was vain. I was thinking cha-ching. I was _________ (fill in your favorite negative word to describe me).
So he comes to Jersey to pick me up. He was driving a Ford Escort. A small little red flag went off in my head. I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he was just cheap with his cars or maybe the beamer was in the shop.
So we go out to eat. We start driving down the road towards nothing in particular and are just talking. He pulls into the mall. I hate the goddamn mall. So I tell him and we leave the mall. It is at this moment that he tells me how much he likes Wendy’s and asks me where there is one. Not my idea of a “date” (I suppose this was a date?) I thought at least Fridays. So we end up at Wendy’s.
He buys me whatever I wanted but then he gets two things from the dollar menu and that was it. Red flag number two I thought. Hmmmmm maybe he could be anorexic? The other half of me was still trying to defend him.
So then we get to the movies. He wants to see nothing in particular and whenever I suggest a movie, he claims he already saw it and it was lame. So we  rent a movie. Red flag number 3? Oh he must be a strong man with strong opinions.
So we go and watch the movie. I go in the door, he comes in the window. We watch. He keeps complimenting me. He wants something. What does he want? Oh wait, me? But the little flags go up and my pants don’t. So he leaves after that.
About two weeks later, I go back to New York. I’m having a pretty good time, meeting people, dancing (yes I once danced), and I see someone cute. So we start talking and I tell him I’m dating someone but it isn’t really that serious. I like to talk too much so I describe the guy. He gets a distraught look on his face.”Does he work for Donald Trump?”, cute boy asks me.  “Yeah he told me that.” I reply.
Turns out he really was 35 years old, worked at the Dunkin Donuts, lived with the parents and not in the penthouse, was HIV positive, had lied to cute boy, and also infected him.
All shreds of decency for this man completely died. I wanted to throw up, I wanted to scream, I wanted to key this man’s car or worse. Then I saw cute boy and I hugged him. He didn’t deserve all this. I didn’t. No one else did.

Shady man had a decent personality and looked good but everything about him was a lie. His whole being was a lie. The few positives about him were bludgeoned. Thankfully shady man was an exception to the rule.
People still can’t help but lie. The age lie is way too common. The ages of 18,21, 29, and 39 still sends off bells and whistles in my head. 18 because I used to say that when I was 14 or 15, the rest because people like to hold on to their 20s or 30s like there is going to be some catatonic occurrence if they were actually 30 or 40.
I am 30 and damn proud. I gave the whole lets pick a random number in the 20s and be that a thought, but it quickly died there. I like to keep my lies simple. Things like: “I have to go my sister just put our rabbit in the microwave or AAAAAAHHHH I just let a squirrel in the house or my dad is attacking my mom with a meat cleaver.” Those work much better for me.
All I can really say to the true liars is this. Watch out cuz spacedog is gonna go into gay commando mode when he finds out. Anyone who’s gone out with me for drinks in Pennsy knows about this mode. Beware.

-spacedog-

A True Partner In Crime

The question of, in ones mind, what makes up a person’s ideally perfect partner is as old as humanity itself. The journey to find ones soul mate is the undying quest of every human past, present, and future has or will endure. The deeply ingrained desire to find the one person, on an entire planet of people that you were destined to be with keeps people perseverant and imprisoned. Once again I find myself facing the eternal question of what would comprise my ideal partner in and for life.
Now almost all men automatically put physical appearance as the number one trait that they seek in a woman first and foremost. I personally do not. In fact physical appearance comes in dead last on my list. There are a singular of physical trait that I would prefer and those would that my partner and an inch or two shorter than me or as tall as me would also suffice. I’m not one of those macho guys that feel the need to tower over their partner like King goddamn Kong . What I mean is I don’t want to be walking down the street with my partner, and have some idle idiot come up to tell me what a pretty daughter I have. The so called height requirement is not written in stone as I consider all women to be attractive no matter what society dictates. Its all about what I and only I think. I don’t give a rat’s ass about what society says I don’t cow down to advertising dictating the way people should look. Its a futile endeavor that servers more over to make people fell like shit about themselves feeding on basic human insecurities. Bottom line some cliches are cliches because their true and with that said beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Emotionally I look for two primary traits in a woman the first is that she is a passionate. As I am an artist, I appreciate and admire passion for anything in any form. I’m not talking specifically talking not just about physical passion (though I like physical passion as much as the next person), but passion in all its forms. It could be a passion for sports, reading, biking,music, B movies or whatever personal passion fuels that emotional component. I think it goes without saying that my ideal woman would be loving which is the key emotional trait I believe everyone man or woman in the world truly is seeking. No one wants to be with someone who doesn’t actually love them (or act in a loving manner) like someone who marries for money or social status for example.
When it comes to the intellect I would want (or need is a more accurate word I suppose) to be with a woman who has above average intelligence. Just a reminder to readers Intelligence and Educated are to separate animals, you can be quite intelligent without being educated. It does not matter how attractive or loving a woman is if I can’t have an intelligent conversation with her. I enjoy learning about an extremely diverse range of subjects (Buddhism, Troma Movies/independent cinema, and psychological warfare to name a few) If I’m with someone who doesn’t care, understand or can’t intellectually keep up then I know the relationship is going to be a rather ferocious failure.
The personality of my ideal partner would have to be positive as I’m a natural born pessimist, and need a partner who can counteract me negativity with their positivity. She would also need to be out going because I’m an introvert who tends to shun society as a whole, and again I’d need my partner to help provide a healthy balance between the world and myself. She must be accepting, open minded to new things and ideas as I am, and patient as I am an emotionally driven artist which means I can make life complicated, chaotic and be a bit overwhelming. My mother wrote my Wife a letter before we got married letting her know that she was glad my Wife could see my big heart underneath all the candy coated craziness as “I’m not an easy person to live with.” I do not deny it in the least as I’m fully aware I’m difficult to deal with or live with let alone marry. This is why I tell people my wife is my far better half with the patience of a saint with a heart of pure gold (which she needs to handle my daily frantic mood swings along with my constant loud ranting and raving endlessly.)
I truly do believe and feel extremely optimistic that any person has beyond excellent chances of meeting their ideal partner as long as they can be perseverant. Finding your ideal partner can take time, as its a process through trial and error. It can take years even decades, but it can be done as long as a person doesn’t become depressed and abandon all hope during the process. I’m not going to sugar coat shit it can be a grueling task finding ones ideal partner, and its no wonder that people can feel hopeless at times. But if you keep your eyes open and remain head strong through the inevitable failed relationships I fully believe anyone will find their ideal partner (in the end no matter what may occur along the way.) I was one of those people who gave up searching and fell into a sea of self pity, but as soon as I stopped obsessing about finding my ideal partner or if this person actually existed only then I found the my ideal partner. Thus its not only possible to find your ideal partner, but to find an ideal partner with every and all traits physically, emotionally, intellectually, and with the personality you desire as long as you don’t succumb to feelings of failure.
The characteristics I value the most in an ideal partner are intelligence as well as personality, as I can’t be with a woman who is not on my intellectual level because we simply wouldn’t have anything meaningful to talk or debate about, and that is something I can’t do without. Personality is the second characteristic I can’t make any exceptions on because I need someone who’s personality is the exact opposite of mine. I’ve been in relationships with women who’s personalities mirrored mine (which one would think would be perfect but its not) ,and each of those relationships in spite of the fact I thought I had found my ideal partner failed due to the fact we were too much alike. I need my ideal partners personality to be outgoing, accepting, open minded and loving or I know that the relationship is doomed from the start.
So in the end its my belief that everyone not only has an ideal partner with the specific desired characteristics, but that anyone in time will find their ideal partner no matter where they may be. Just like anything, as long as you don’t give up or break down and settle for second best, you will succeed in your quest for your perfect partner as I did.

Shotguns, My Grandfather & The Guy Who Should Have Died

My grandparents lived in a Farmhouse built circa 1883 on a massive 1,100 ache plus property down south in a tiny town know as Podunk. Every summer and every Christmas my family and I would drive down to  visit my grandparents on the farm since my brother and I were off from school. While the town was so tiny (that when it got a second traffic light it was a big goddamn deal let me tell you) there are 2 major trucking companies headquarters located in Podunk that run 18 wheelers all day and all night long transporting everything under the sun. Luckily when the main road in and out of Podunk was to be built they asked my great grandfather about its placement since( like the original 19th century dirt road) it would run through a portion of his property. So instead of having the modern road run directly outside of the Farm house’s front yard gate he decided to have it built this time with a huge curve that brought the road out to a 1/4 of a mile from the main house. Between the farmhouse and the new road is essential a giant grassy field with a semi circle dirt driveway that allows the house to be accessed by 2 separate entries from the outlying road. Now on the outer side of the large curve is a 6 1/2 foot ditch (before you reach the woods) and for the life of me to this very day I have no idea why the town hasn’t put of warning signs for the truckers. See if your driving an 18 wheeler and are going slow you’ll hug the road to safety ,BUT if your driving an 18 wheeler and your going to fast you’ll run off the road and plumet head first into the aforementioned big ass ditch.

One summer while we were visiting my grandparents when late one night we all got one hell of a scare. What set off the insane events of that night started when a trucker driving a rather big tanker truck filled with liquid pesticide was speeding a bit and thusly found himself plunging head long into the ditch of death. The first thing that saved the driver’s life was when he crashed he was thrown from the cab, but this only got him out of the frying pan into the fire. If I recollect correctly the driver’s injuries included (but not limited to) Broken and cracked ribs, internal bleeding, severe lacerations, 2 completely shattered legs, head trauma, fractured right wrist, and massive bruising not to mention he was in shock as well. When the driver gathered his senses and managed to look around at his surroundings (as well as thanking whatever god he prays too for not being instantly and violently killed) he saw the far off light of farmhouse’s front porch lights and knew it was his only hope or he would in fact die on the side of the road. So summoning all his remaining strength the driver slowly (and I imagine quite painfully) pulled himself using just his arms and dragged himself the 1/4 mile across the grassy field and across to the front yard. I don’t know if the driver couldn’t get up the stairs to the front porch, but he again dragged himself around the side of the farmhouse to what is referred to as the middle porch. Its called the middle porch for one simple reason which is back in 1883 fire was a huge concern especially if you lived in a small rural town. Thusly to combat the threat of fire the architects of the day designed houses so you’d have the  house with a middle porch in-between the main house and the kitchen as well as dinning room. This way if your kitchen (which was the biggest threat of fire) did catch fire the middle porch provided a buffer in-between.

Once the driver reached the middle porch he preceded to punch his way through the screen of the exterior door leading off the middle porch to the surrounding yard. The driver opened the door and then pulled himself up onto the porch. From there he once again dragged himself in excruciating agony to the door to the main house and pounded on the door like his life depended on it which it did. The driver was screaming bloody murder things like”There’s been an accident! HELP! HELP ME PLEASE! Oh God, PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR I don’t want to die out here…” obviously to get the attention and aid of the homeowner (who for all he knew wan’t even home).

Now as one might imagine being that it was around 2 a.m. in the morning, virtually pitch black outside (no streetlights or urban sprawl makes night even darker), and we were located in such a rural area outside of a tiny town that we were basically on our own (the average police response time to the property is around 40 minutes or more.) There are 2 bedrooms at the back of the house on the 1st floor across from one another my brother and I slept in one and my parents slept in the other. I remember opening our bedroom door just a minute crack as to allow a singular eye to peer out into the hallway. I saw my father too had cracked open my parents bedroom door and glanced over at me to give me the universal “STAY THERE” hand gesture. All of us were freaked the hell out and had no idea what to do because like I said if there was a crash alright, but it could be some sick son of a bitch trying to gain access to the house and all that terrible shit. A minute or two of being frozen in place by paralyzing fear I heard the familiar sound of the wood stairs creaking as someone came down them and immediately looked to see what was going on there to see my grandparents. My grandfather being 6’3″ with a poker face made of stone and a shotgun in each hand was leading the way down the stairs.  My petite 5 foot nothing grandmother was literally right behind him and looked flustered as hell. My grandfather walked to the door not saying a word, unlocked it and forcefully swung it open. The driver collapsed backwards as the door flung open to see my grandfather standing there in his pajamas silently pointing a wicked looking pair of shotguns at him. At this point it was obvious there had in fact been a horrendous crash and there wasn’t some deranged rapist serial killer, and my parents and grandmother went into crisis damage control. My grandmother called 911, my father asked the man what happened and my mom frantically gathered first aid items. Meanwhile my grandfather continued to stand in the door way completely quite still aiming both gun barrels at the injured driver. After assessing the initial situation my grandmother suggested we move the injured driver off the porch and into the house’s main hallway, and it was then my grandfather spoke for the first and only time during the whole ordeal. What my grandfather said I will remember to the day I die and its only one singular sentence                         “Don’t bleed on my carpet.”

Note to Reader: The driver was taken by ambulance to the nearest hospital for emergency medical treatment. My father called the hospital the next day and was informed the driver was alive, stable and would completely recover from all of his various injuries.