Tag: Peyote

My Decade of Debauchery : The Foreshadowing Preface

After High School I didn’t have a fucking clue what the hell to do. I was young, and hated authority in any form. Needlessly to say I was jobless and had NO DESIRE to ever enter the Workforce. I had no desire to become one of those poor people who waste the prime years of their life at work only to retire and resent it. I drank like a fucking fish while smoking cigarettes excessively from the time I opened my eyes to the time I passed the fuck out. I was on numerous illicit substances usually a combination of several daily morning, noon or night. I was what is referred to as a “Functioning Drug Addict” which simply means I can party my ass off and still function.

I  was EXTREMELY Opinionated and not afraid to state it no matter where or when I had an opinion on every fucking thing there was or is. My Mother I remember took me aside one day and said,”You have to watch your mouth because unless someone REALLY knows you at some point you’ll insult, offend, shock or anger someone, and their going to turn around and punch you in the face.”

I lived at home with my Mother as by then my parents had been divorced for a couple years. I also had the habit off pissing off one of my parents after a few months and then bailing to go live with my other parent. This was great for at one point I was living with my Father in a Dope Apartment in the center of town over a fancy ass restaurant, and was never there because of work and he was dating a good bit ( I met several women who’s names and faces I forget and don’t mind that I’ve forgotten.) So I had the place all to my self I had the entire run of the place. I digress for now that that is a completely different set of Stories all together, and I plan to save for another time.

I also had an extreme impulsive control issues as I had none at the time, with a horrendous temper I inherited from my Father (R.I.P) Whatever I thought to say I said and whatever I thought to do I did immediately without a single thought about any possible consequences. It was also true I had a Knack for getting in trouble, but ultimately I never suffered any serious side effects (Example: Getting Arrested Numerous Times)

I knew I needed cash to fund my” Low Life” life style and feed my various addictions as the grew bigger and badder over time. I was what is referred to by Narcotics Anonymous as a “Garbage Can” meaning we didn’t have one particular drug we craved and indulged in as opposed to others. I did them them all. I did whatever I could get my deviant hands on because my true drug was MORE. I never cared what it was just give me MORE AND MORE, but I”ll never be satisfied. I did Cocaine (I snorted and injected it), Smoked Crack, Shot/ snorted Heroin, Dropped Acid (Paper or Liquid), Ate Ecstasy and MDMA, Crystal Meth, Peyote, Micro Dots, PCP, and the some pills such as Vicodin, Xanax, Valium, but thank fuck I got out of the drug game before Pain Pills became EXTREMELY POTENT and READILY AVAILABLE. The one addiction I’m glad I narrowly avoided is/was gambling as I’m positive I suck at it from the get go, and would have lost even more shit in my life than I did with the Drink and Drugs.

I don’t include Marijuana because I don’t consider it a drug and remain a daily smoker.

With no prospects for a future outside of our shitty little town that we both despised with people we fucking hated Armenian and I decided to Sell Drugs. I don’t personally consider Marijuana to be a drug, but unfortunately the DEA decides these matters. With that said we dealt mainly in Pot, LSD and PCP. If we didn’t have what you wanted at the time we knew where to get it. This lead to a  good bit of middle man work done on our part and of course charge a finders fee which could be paid in cash or stash we weren’t picky per say.

Now the Armenian was dating this girl E which meant it wasn’t just me and Armenian it was a goddamn package deal. On top of that bullshit we found out an acquaintance of ours named Guru who happened to be selling the same shit in the same area. Armenian and I decided joining forces was better than fighting for turf and customers, yet E was highly opposed to the idea and protested loudly. In spite of her opinion Armenian and I proposed to Guru our merger idea and we partnered up.

Thats Enough of That Now with More to Come.

Les Sober 

SpaceDog & Dullard’s Inter Dimensional Demise

Well hell I just don’t know wtf to begin with this little ditty but we must start somewhere. The Kiddies (Staff) mentioned in their post that as far as they knew SpaceDog was MIA, but they also stated I claimed to know the current whereabouts of SpaceDog and at that time I did. SpaceDog had taken sometime off during our move to live out his dream of true inner vision out in some god forsaken desert, and brought our Chief Editor Dullard Dillard along for the ride. As luck would have it while transversing the barren beauty of the vast desert plains SpaceDog and Dullard came across a small commune. The commune was a Hippy dinosaur disillusionment hangover from “The Love Generation” founded by Dr. Nirvana Namaste (who founded to commune in 1961 after fleeing from Berkley University where he was a professor of Geology.)

SpaceDog and Dullard were invited by the current Commune leader and son of Dr. Nirvana Namaste High Hippy Freedom Haberdasher or Clive for short. SpaceDog held lengthy conversations over the next 4-5 days talking about transcendentalism with the members of the Commune (dubbed The THC Ministry Farms by its 78 full time inhabitants) well into the wee hours of the morning.

SpaceDog had always dreamed of actually whipping up a big old punch bowl with what he called “Electric Kool Aid”, and figured he had an apt audience. So SpaceDog asked Clive if he could repay his and Dullard’s stay at the commune by making a metaphysical meditation medication. Clive not being to concerned of the risk because well they were 117 miles from anything remotely resembling civilization. SpaceDog went to work (as Dullard watched wide eyed in shock and Awe) without pause concocting his Enlightenment Elixir. First Spacedog filled a massive punch bowl (25 gallon to be exact) with cheap fruit punch that consisted mainly of water, sugar and red dye. The SpaceDog added the list of secret ingredients (which is a bit foolish to say as SpaceDog had told quite a few people over the years about his Holy Psychedelic Venture)

This is now time for our Disclaimer & WARNING:

  1. The views, opinions and actions portrayed in posts ARE NOT THAT OF f-yourblog.com.
  2. We DO NOT Advocate, Encourage or Endorse ANY AND ALL  extremely dangerous acts that our subject (or subject manner) may pertain to in a post, we are just mere reporters, Documentarians, and Story Tellers.

WARNING TO ALL READERS!

We at f-yourblog do not condone drug use and believe Addiction to be a serious and dire subject.

DO NOT ATTEMPT ANYTHING REMOTELY LIKE what SpaceDog did EVER. If you do the list of severely sick shit that can happen to you include but are not limited to:

HOSPITALIZATION, SEVER NEUROLOGICAL DAMAGE, SEVERE BRAIN DAMAGE, DEATH, EXTREME MOOD SWINGS, LACK OF REASON/COMMON SENSE, DIZZINESS, DELUSION, HALLUCINATION, HEART ATTACK/ STROKE, SELF DESTRUCTIVE BEHAVIOR (IE. SELF HARM), INSANITY, PSYCHOSIS, PARANOIA ,AND DEMENTIA and thats just for starters.

NOW back to our story…

Spacedog proceeded to add MDMA, LSD, Ecstasy, Magic Mushrooms (Psilocybin), Peyote, Mescolilne, PCP, Micro Dots, DMT, Ayahuasca, Salvia Divinorum, DXM, Areca catechu, Kava (Piper methysticum), Ipomoea tricolor, Khat,Fly Agaric Mushrooms, Datura Stramonium (Hell’s Bell’s or Jimson weed), Wormwood, Heavenly Blue Morning Glory Seeds, Areca Catechu (Betel Nut), Plants containing Atropine/Scopolmine,Lysergic Acid Amide,Eboga,Mexican Calea,San Pedro Torch Cactus,Blue Egyptian Water Lily,Colorado River Toad Poison, and Cannabis Sativa. There were also likely a few more ingredients that were added in an impromptu manner in the making.

SpaceDog’s psychotic psychedelic punch made its debut at that nights Feast of the Full Moon Festival. Now this is were shit gets really fucking weird, and the details are sketchy as sketchy can get. According to the surviving Commune Members some of the things that occurred that evening are as follows:

  1. 9 Members Brains liquefied and drained out of their Nasal Cavities
  2. 2 Members Spontaneously Combusted
  3. 17 Ran off into the desert night claiming that they were going in search of The Gumdrop Gods to request that they be allowed to live in Candy Land Board Game, and have yet to be found.
  4. Several members climbed large cactuses nude.
  5. 3 Members became convinced they were ancient desert Tortoises and still believe that to this day.
  6. 4 Members were transported back in time, but their destinations in the historical timeline are uncertain.
  7. 11 Members blasted off into outer space to have a foot race using the Rings of Saturn as their race track.
  8. 1 member reverted from a full grown adult into a barely viable fetus.
  9. A Couple of Members listened to Chumbawamba and Tub Thumped one another to death.
  10. 6 Members actually jumped out of their own skin.

But what happened to SpaceDog and Dullard Dillard you ask? Well I can tell you what I’ve been told so here goes:

  1. Dullard Dillard allegedly came face to face with his Doppelgänger. A Doppelgänger is a German word that means “A Ghostly/Paranormal identical double or counterpart of a Living Person”. The Myth is if you encounter an apparition of yourself is/was an Omen of imminent death. The best way I can explain this subject further is “The Omen of Death” refers to a similar belief in Doppelgängers that if you encounter your Doppelgänger you will cease to exist. Think of it this way its the same as adding a positive number 1 and a negative number 1 together (-1+1=0). It was reported that when Dullard came face to face with his own Doppelgänger (No one else there saw Dullard’s Doppelgänger based on what happened though its considered the cause of Dullard’s disappearance) he exclaimed “I’m You, Your Me, together its We”, and then proceeded to turn inside out, outside in, inside out, outside in again then he simply imploded.

  1. SpaceDog Fared a much less detrimental outcome though it is equally bizarre. SpaceDog is alive but is still tripping his celestial balls off thus details as to his exact whereabouts are unknown. SpaceDog keeps referencing a “Emerald Triangle” (a infamous area of Marijuana Smuggling Routes) so we assume at this point he’s headed North West possible to Canada.

Thus we find ourselves at the end of this tale of Oddities, and I leave you to make up your own minds as far as wtf went down that night in the vast Desert.

Thanks for the Read,

Les Sober