Tag: Scientific Research

The Optica Network

Welcome to this Monday’s Post featuring Gothic Arthouse’s THE OPTICA NETWORK. This Set of Three Videos reminds Me of a Piece We did awhile Back Called LOCAL 58 (which is Located in the Strange and Disturbing Video Section) where a Local TV Station’s Broadcast Signal is Hijacked, and Ominous Messages from a Unknown Malevolent Force start Appearing on Local 58. It also reminds Me of an Upcoming Piece on the Happy Vally Dream Survey which is a Story for Another Day. Each Video has a Description Followed by a Weird Shit in the Video Weird Shit List. Let’s get Started Shall We.

Enjoy.

                   

Video 1: What Do You  See When You Dream?

Description: What You see when You Dream can mean different Things. tell Us, what are You seeing in Your Dreams?

Weird Shit List:

  • The Video Starts like an Old VHS Tape.
  • The First Scene is Someone who is Out of Breath staring out a Second Story Window at Someone standing on the Sidewalk Outside.
  • Logo For (Channel) 91 The Optica Network
  • First Message on Screen: Continued Learning What Do You See when We Close Our Eyes?
  • Announcer “Welcome to Start of Part 9” though there No Previous Videos/
  • Announcer Claims “Your Sleep may be Compromised if Someone Other than Your Optica Agent is Present.”
  • Then Optica issues a list of Red Flags for when You Sleep.
  • Flying= Expierancing Flight in Your Dream may suggest You’re ready to make a Bold Decision.” This is Followed by a Red Screen that Warns “DO NOT make Any Decision before Consulting Your Optica Agent.”

  • Falling = Translates to You losing Control of Your Will, and if You’ve Signed Your Optica Sign Up Form these Dreams Should Not Persist.
  • Being Chased = If Your pursued in Your Dream Report IMMEDIATELY to Your Optica Agent You may Need….(Video scrambles)
  • Drumwort: No Explanation Provided.
  • Being Trapped = If you find Yourself Trapped in Your Dream DO NOT TALK TO YOURSELF! Red Screen Warning “Duplicates are Dangerous and DO NOT APPROACH Under Any Circumstance.
  • A Class of Infants: Screen Scrambles before any sort of Explanation.
  • Ad for Selby’s Lookalike Service/Agency
  • Text on Screen: Dream Reports Remain Vital and there’s a Redacted Phone Number.
  • Screen goes black with Audio of a Patient and what most likely are Research Scientists. Text at bottom of the Screen reads: Confidential Optica Records NOT for Public Domain, and the Term Unexplained Re-Attachment.
  • Blue Screen who Text Reads “There is Nothing to Worry About” directly followed by more Text that Reads “Go To Sleep Immediately”
  • 91 Logo Pops up Again with the Message “He can Only Hurt You if You’re Awake.”

Video 2: How Long Does A Dream Last?

Description: How long does a Dream Last? A lot Longer than You would Imagine apparently.

Weird Shit List:

  • Again Starts like a Old VHS Tape
  • Channel 91 Emergency Tone Test.
  • Tone Test Announcement “If You hear a nUmbered Sequence during the Tone Test Report to Your Local Optica Agent IMMEDIATELY!”
  • Tone Test Countdown Screen.
  • Screen Post Tone Test: If You heard a Numbered Sequence contact Us Immediately and there is a Redacted Phone Number.
  • Ad for Sunday Family Fun Annual Mass Suicide that starts at 1 pm, and remember to Bring Your Own Instrument of Death.
  • Channel 91 Logo with Message: Thank You for Your patience We can now Return You to the Advice Hour.”
  • Advice Hour Tutorial: How To Fall Asleep.
  • VHS Tape appears on Screen and An Announcer says, “If You Haven;t already make sure to Pick Up Understanding Our Dreams the Century before Next Thursday Afternoon and that this is Compulsory Material.

  • Channel 91 Logo with a Garbled Indecipherable Voice Talking followed by a Blue Screen that Reads : Broadcast Compromised Please Hold.
  • Picture of a Phone with the word Sanctuary 5 in the Lower Left Corner.
  • Screen Goes Black with Text Reading: Confidential Optica Records. NOT for Public Domain. Dream Re-Call GQ167.
  • Audio Starts of a Patient recounting His Dream with Hospital/Medical Facility noises in the Background. The Suspected Patient talks about His Kids growing up and How He tried to Keep Them Safe from “Him”.
  • Emergency Broadcast: SLEEP IS VITAL.
  • Grainy Black and White Video of a Man talking about Keeping Himself Awake, When He does wake up He Doesn’t Remember Who He is, That He sees “Him” in the Distance, and Every time I sleep (“He”) gets Closer.

Video Number 3: Can Your Dream Predict The Future?

Description: Can Your Dream predict the Future? Process. Integrate. Understand. The Sleeping Brain works on Multiple Levels.

Weird Shit List: 

  • Once again starts like an Old VHS Tape.
  • Interior Shot of a House and its Front Door.  Someone Outside is asking the Resident Personal Information Questions like “Are You Capable of Recognizing Yourself in the Mirror?”, and the Residents Answers sound like Static like Noises with Translation in Subtitle Form.
  • Channel 91 Logo with Text: Continued Learning How to Describe a Dream.
  • Blue Screen: Understanding Dream Behavior Tutorial that References the First Video (Ironically titled Part 9)and State Dreams can be Prophetic.
  • Picture of the Sanctuary 5 Phone playing a Automated Recording of a Woman Saying, “You have reached the Optica Network Thank You for Calling, Unfortunately We are Unable to take Your call right now. In order to Report Your Dream Please leave Your Message After the Tone.”
  • A Man Leaves a Message apparently He is a Delivery Guy looking for a Mr. Brandrift to confirm the order for 4 grams of Gingerbread, and wonders if this is in fact a mistake. He then says there is time to make Alterations to the Order before it is Delivered.

  • Next Message is an Old Sounding Man that States “You have to Bring Me Back There’s been a Mistake I can’t Sleep Anymore.”
  • Third Message is Man Reporting His Dream where a mysterious Rope depends from the Sky. There Scientists there and one Grabs it and is Sucked Up into the Air and Out of Sight. The Last thing the Unfortunate Scientist is heard Saying is Drumwort Over and Over Again.
  • Hospital Security Camera Footage of a Hallway While a Man on the PA System Stating a Patient needs Assistance.
  • Yet another Voice Mail Message of a Man calling from the International Space Station. He/They are calling to wish “You” a Happy Birthday as is Tradition.
  • A Sleep is Vital Advertisment.
  • Black Screen with Text: Confidential Optica Records Not for Public Domain Patient 425 Re-Submerged. The Audio is of a Hysterical Crying Man pleading HE can’t Sleep Anymore. A Optica Representative Tells the Distraught Man ” You’re going to be Spending a Little more Time with Him for Us.”

  • Another Sanctuary  Phone Message from the Delivery Guy Again. He says the Order has be Altered and now it’s Just Herbs. Again He wonders if this is a Mistake, and advises there is Still Time to Fix it if it is indeed a Mistake.
  • Additional Voice Message from a Man Reporting His Dream that mimicked His Daily Routine Specifically His Bus Ride to Work every Morning. The Man says He’s calling because He Found Optica’s Phone Number on a Flier.
  • Channel 91 Logo with Text that Reads You are Watching the Obituary Hour.
  • Optica Logo Appears and Announcer Says “It is with a Heavy Heart We must announce the Death of Patient 068 Lorraine Nelson as She enters Eternal Sleep. May She be Remembered for the Great Sacrifice….Screen Scrambles.
  • Advertisement for Optica Juniors or Optica for Kids.
  • Sleep is Vital Message on Screen along with Optica Logo.
  • Channel 91 Logo with Text that Reads: Join Us Next Time for Inside Optica Network. Have a Question for one of Our Participants? Make Sure yOu Send them to the Following Address…Screen Cuts Out.

Thank You For Reading/Watching,

   Presented By Les Sober  

Tidbits For Shits And Giggles: Science (Animated)

We are Amused to Present Science by David Firth under His fatpie2 Moniker. Science is Through back to the Stark and Often Asinine Educational Science Films of the 1950’s.

For those of You Who do Not Know or May Not Be Aware David Firth is an English Animator, Director, Writer, Musician, Actor, Voice Actor, Video Artist, and Broadcaster of Whom We are a Big Fan of Here at FYB. Several of Firth’s works in Flash Animation, along with Multiple Music Videos and Works of Video Art, have Garnered a Large Followings.

Synopsis: Science (2008)- 2 Scientists fill in some gaps in our collective knowledge. Dr. John Science and Dr. Research Jones have teamed up to work on Tobacco Studies for the Big Cigarette Companies. The Two Scientists agree a lot of Scientific Experiments have been Done throughout History and A Lot Haven’t, and there Many Gaps to Fill. The Question the Scientists face is “Why haven’t More Animals Tried Smoking Tobacco Products?” This leads the Scientists to taking a Trip to the Land of Gazelles. Once the Scientists reach Their Destination They make an Amazing Scientific Discovery pertaining to Gazelles.

“This Cartoon I made for the Playboy Website in 2008. I’m not sure if they ever used it. Their animation section didn’t show up on Google for some reason and then mysteriously disappeared.” -David Firth (aka fatpie2)

Enjoy.

Thanks For Watching,

Presented By Les Sober  

Once Trump Is Shit Canned WTF DO We DO With All The #MAGAssholes?!!

When Trump gets His Fat Orange Ass Booted from the Whitehouse What will Happen to all His Shitbag Supporters? This is a  Question I have been Mulling Over in My head for Quite some time Now. It’s like Germany at the End of World War II Once The War was Over, The Nazis Lost, and Hitler was Dead the German Public had to deal with the Left Over Nazi Soilders. The Nazis were such Pieces of fucking Shit that it didn’t seem right to just let them Reintegrate back into Society and call it a Day. People that are that fucked in the Head, and are the Scum of the Earth need Consequences for Their fucked up Actions. The World Dictates some sort of Retribution is Required in Extreme Cases such as These.

Let’s fucking face it MAGAs are Worse than fucking Nazi Scumbags. Nazi’s wanted to Use Genocide to Illuminate Jewish People from the Planet, and to Take over the Entire fucking Earth. MAGAs are Racist Ratfucks but They are also Sexist, Antisemitic, Homophobic, Ignorant, Hate filled, Mindless, Uneducated, Moronic, Inbred, Gullible, Child Molesting, Rapist White Trash Sheep the Absolute Worst Humanity has to Offer. These People bring Nothing Positive or Productive to the Table their Not Leaders Their Mindless Lemmings Born to Blindly Follow without Question. So when The Treasonous Orange Asshole and His Crooked Administration of Utter Assholes time in the Whitehouse is Inevitably Up They will be Subject to Arrest, Prosecution, Conviction, and Imprisonment for Their Crimes the Cowardly Traitors. The Fact Remains though We can’t lock up all the MAGAssholes (though We all want To) there simply too many of the Dumbfucks to Deal with.

               

So What do We do with all the Left Over MAGAssholes Then? Well I just so Happens to have the Perfect Solution for Handling these Pro Trump Dipshits. True We can’t Imprison Them all, and it’s Less than Likely that We would be Granted Permission to Kill the Sons Of Inbred Bitches on Sight which is a Shame as I think a MAGA Hunting Season would be Splendid. Now that We have established We can’t Lock them Up or Hunt Them for Sport what Option(s) do We have Left on the Table? The Answer My friends is DEPORTATION! That’s right Deporting MAGAs would be Hilarious as Hell since the Racist RatBastard Rejects want to Deport all the Immigrants so Deporting Them is Poetic Justice Personified.

Now thats just the beginning because once We have Decided to Outsource These MAGAssholes where do We Deport Them to Exactly? It is a Very Tricky and Rather Difficult Situation because Who in Their right fucking Mind would Allow Us to Deport MAGAs to Their Country. Absolutely No One I can fucking think of Thats for Sure and You Can’t Blame Them. The Rest of the World has Watched America Slide Down the Shitter (thanks to Fucktard Trump and the GOPieces of Shit) for the Past 4 Years. They have also witnessed How Shitty MAGAs are  so Why would They want/allow the MAGAssholes coming to take up Residence in Their Beloved Homeland? MAGAs are Human Parasites that do Nothing but Take Up Space, Waste Air, and Shit All Over Everything while Providing Nothing Beneficial to Society or the World Around Them. They are Human TapeWorms and Should be Dealt with as Such in that Parasites should be Eradicated No Matter What.

               

So Thus We are stuck with the Geographical Dilemma facing the Deportation of Any and All MAGAssholes. Fear Not Friends for I have Figured out the Solution to the Geography Conundrum and its Quite Simply and Extremely Easy to Execute. We Deport the MAGAssholes to the Continent of ANTARCTICA! Yes thats goddamn right I said ANT-fucking-ARCTICA. I’m pretty positive that You’re wonder Why Antarctica which is a Valid Question so Allow Me to Answer. First of Size Wise it got more than Enough Room (5,500,000 Square Miles Antarctica is the 5th Largest Continent and Twice the Size of Australia) for the Millions of MAGAssholes to live with Plenty of Elbow room. Second Antartica is One of if Not the Whitest Places on the Entire Planet so the Racist Nazi White Nationalist MAGAs would fucking love that shit.

Also there is No actual Population already Living in Antarctica to Deny the Entrance of the MAGAsshole Mother Load. There Approximately 1,000 Scientific Researchers Stations in the Winter, and about 5,ooo in Summer, giving it a Population Density of between 70 and 350 inhabitants per Million Square Kilometers (180 and 900 per Million Square Miles). Point being there’s Plenty of Room where the MAGAsshole can hangout that wouldn’t be a Bother or Imposition to the Various Countries Scientific Researchers.

               

Also there is No Established Government, Infrastructure, Military, or Government Agencies to Contend with. It is True though that Several Countries (such as France, Russia, United Kingdom, Australia, Norway, Chile,Argentina, and New Zealand for Example) claim Sovereignty in Certain Regions. While Very Few of these Countries have Mutually Recognized Each Other’s Claims, the Validity of these Claims in Not Recognized Universally. Antartica’s Status is Regulated by the 1959 Antarctic Treaty and Other Related Agreements, collectively called the Antarctic Treaty System.

Many People at this Point would Ask about all the Insane and Expensive Resources that would be needed for People to Survive in the Brutal Antarctic Frozen Wasteland (I mean Antarctica is the Coldest Continent on Earth with Temperatures going as lows between negative  112 degrees Farenhight and Negative 128 degrees Farenhieght). Also there are Virtually No Resources for Shelter or Food be it Hunting, Gathering, or Farming) which makes it one of the Most Inhospitable Places on the Planet. The Largest fucking Animal in Antarctica is a Wingless Midge (Belgica Antarctica) which is Less than 1.3 cm Long for Fucks Sake, it’s a Minuscule Insect. All Other Larger Animals are Considered Marine Animals, meaning that They Feed and Lively Mainly in the Ocean and includes Seals and Penguins. There are No Trees or Shrubs in Antarctica, and only Two Species of Flowering Plants Antarctic Hair Grass and Antarctic Pearlwort. The Bottomline is Antarctica Doesn’t have a Permanent Population for a fucking Reasons.

               

As Far as Resources or Monetary Budget I Again have an Answer for that which is WHO FUCKING CARES?!!

These MAGAssholes Don’t Deserve Any Outside Help to Possible manage to Survive in the Desolate and Frigid Antarctic Climate. Remember I said Deport Them Not Support Them. We let Them Pack whatever the fuck They want and Then We deport Them without any Assistance Programs in Place whatsoever. I mean Why waste Money on Such fucking Shitty People when You can Deport Them and Let Antarctica Resolve the Problem so to Speak. Let Them Freeze, Let Them Starve, and Let Them Die of Sickness its what MAGAssholes Deserve. If We can’t Kill Them Off Let Mother Nature handle it For Us. Point Being the Only Good MAGAsshole is a DEAD MAGAsshole.

Thanks For Reading,

  By Les Sober

(Pt100Am)