Tag: Starbucks

PUMPKIN SPICE – White Woman Season

Welcome to Today’s FYB Post featuring PUMPKIN SPICE – WHITE WOMAN SEASON byOne of Our Favorite Animators Meatcanyon. MeatCanyon’s real name is Hunter August Hancock better know by His online user name MeatCanyon. Hancock is an American Youtuber, Animator, Voice Actor, Comedian, Writer, and Director who makes Parody Animations of Popular Characters (say Sponge Bob for instance). Some viewers of MeatCanyon’s Animations  have been Described them in just One Single Word “Horrifying”. A common on going gag in Hancock’s video’s is that Something Normal or Mundane gets You Killed or Possible Worse.

                        

One of the Key Reasons We get a Real fucking Kick Out of this Particular MeatCanyon Cartoons is the Social Commentary. First Off Let’s all fucking Face it this Pumpkin Spice Obsession that People have is Way the Hell Out of Control at this Point. It was Annoying Enough when it was just Fucking Starbucks (or Starbucks as We refer to Them as) Pimped Their Pumpkin Spice Coffee every fucking October Relentlessly. Then every Other Motherfucker started Peddling a Pumpkin Spice Version of Their fucking Products from Coffee Creamer to Spam. Yeah that’s fucking Right fucking SPAM the Infamous Canned fucking Meat adds Pumpkin Spice to the Ears and Assholes or Whatever Meat Scrap Dog Food They Use. Again I Think We all can fucking Agree when there is a Pumpkin Spice Spam shit has Gone WAY TOO fucking Far.

Now as Far as Starbucks is Concerned its Nothing More than a Caffeine Fueled Scam. Coffee is Simply Hot Water Filtered through fucking Coffee Bean Grounds so Essentially it’s Hot Caffeinated Coffee Flavored fucking Water. And We could care the fuck Less about all the Bullshit Gimmicks (There Others then just the Pumpkin Spice Shit) like Whip Cream Topping, Sprinkle of fucking Cinnamon, Adding Caramel fucking Drizzle it’s all Horseshit. Also We Do Not Give a Flying fuck that They call Their Employees as fucking Baristas or That They sell fucking Fruit. Not to Mention the Pathetically  Lame CDs (Yeah fucking CDs believe that Shit) by People NO ONE GIVES A RAT’S ASS ABOUT which is Why Their CD is being Sold at a Pompous Over Rated Commercialized Coffee Shop Chain.

Bottomline on this Starbucks bullshit is They try WAY TOO FUCKING HARD to come off as Some Authentic High Class Italian Coffee Shop. The Reality it’s Run by Greedy Corporate Whores and is a Americanized Wannabe Classy European/Italian Bistro when it’s just a SCAM to get Gullible Gimmick Loving Lemmings to Pay $9 for Hot Coffee Flavored Water. If Your a Starbucks Fan and get all Bent about this Please Go Butt Chug a $12 DickNip-Dipshit-Half Caff Motherfucking Mocha Latte on Us  (and Don’t forget the fucking Pumpkin Spice Asshole)!!!

Enjoy.

It is What it Is,

  Presented By Les Sober  

The Tale of Dunkin Donuts Man & Starbucks Woman

I was out this Weekend with My Wife at The Godawful Grocery Store Battling the Mind Numbing Monotony of it All. You see Errands Irritate the Shit Out of Me it’s Not the Actual Act of Shopping its All the Other Assholes I have to circumvent or Deal with Outright. The One thing that was Amusing Me was the New Dunkin Donuts T-Shirt I found in My Closet (I can’t remember where it came from Initially.) which Read: Friends Don’t Let Friends Drink Starbucks.

I got a huge fucking kick as I am a Big Time Dunkin Donuts Fan I also fucking HATE THE SHIT OUT OF STARBUCKS always Have ALWAYS WILL. Starfuck’s Coffee is a bunch of Over Hyped and Over Priced Bitter Bullshit, and Not Only That but Starfucks Customers are Pretentiously Lame Lemmings. Starfucks Pompus Customers that get Off on all the Happy Hipster Horseshit like calling the Employees Baristas or the fucking Ridiculously Coded Names for Their Coffees.

My Wife stepped away for a Minute to retrieve some sort of Ass Cream. This was for the Sole purpose of having Me ask Why She was Buying Ass Cream, and then Her Saying  “It’s for My Asshole.” before Handing it Directly To Me with a Sly Smile. I like to see that I rubbed off on Her a Bit over the Years even if its My Absurd Sarcastic Sense Humor.

       

While My Wife was off Getting Her Prop so She could Set Me Up a Woman came Strolling By. Then out of fucking No Where She stops right in from of Me. She stood there Facing Me glaring like She just smiled the Foulest Fart imaginable with one Hand on the Shopping Cart Handle and the Other on Her Waist. She remained standing thee like that before finally speaking the fuck up, and when She did She Said “I HATE Your Shirt.” in a Totally Pissed the fuck Off tone of Voice.

After making Her Spite Filled Statement She again just Stood there in front of Me Disapprovingly like a Angry ass Soccer Mom or Some shit. Now Normally I’d have a Clever and Bitter Response that would have Leveled Her, BUT I was completely Blind Sided by This Barrage of Bullshit. So going with My Knee Jerk Reaction I Blurted out “Well Fuck You Too.” To My Surprise the Woman remained Standing Unfazed by My Harsh and Foul Mouthed Response.

The Two of Us remained in this bizarre Stand Off until luckily for Me My Wife returned. She immediately knew something weird was going on by  the Scowl on My face. She asked what was going on, and I informed Her this Stranger had Stopped specifically to tell Me she Hated My Shirt. That and at that Point I had responded with the exclamation “Well Fuck You Too.” My Wife looked over at the Lady and said to her something about being a Starbucks Lover (aka Dunkin Donut Hater) to which The Strange Woman confirmed.

I was still a bit baffled by this bullshit scenario because She didn’t say She Hated My Shirt Jokingly, She didn’t say it Sarcastically, and She didn’t do the Whole “I’m only half Joking because really I’m being a Dick using a Backhanded Compliment.” She simply got in My face and Told Me She Hated My Shirt with No Context or Emotion other than Repulsed Disgust.

A Moment or Two after Admitting Her comment was Pro Starbucks Driven the Woman finally Turned and slowly walked away pushing Her Shopping Cart with Aggravated Determination. Seconds after the Woman Exited the Isle a Man came by and informed Me he liked the Shirt and thought it made all the sense in the World. He pointed out How this Weirdo Woman’s reaction only served to back the Statement written on My T-Shirt. Thats because Starbucks Coffee is Not just a fucking Scam, BUT Their Customers are Stuck the fuck Up Elitist Coffee Assholes to boot.

We finished Our Shopping Trip without Running into the StarBucks Bitch again which I guess is for the Best since I ended up getting rather Pissed Myself after the Fact. The funny fucking thing is Out of ALL (I have an extensive Collection I’ve Accumulated over My Many Years on this Planet) T-Shirts that I Own This was the One that Pissed Off Someone to the Point They had to Personally Inform Me of Their Hate. I mean in all actuality have some T-shirts that are So Offensive I don’t wear them in Public Anymore, Yet its NOT because Someone Confronted Me over any of Them. I’m just trying to Save Myself Bullshit Run Ins like The One I just Wrote About.

Thanks for Reading,

 By Les Sober

F to the U to the C to the K

I have to vent some as I’ve got that fucked up feeling like I’m actually going insane.

I can fucking feel It.

I fucking fear It.

I fucking am It.

FUCK IT BEGINS:

Fuck The Bullshit.  Fuck Them. Fuck Money.  Fuck Pharmaceuticals.

Fuck Taxes. Fuck Censorship.  Fuck Salt.  Fuck Bills.

Fuck Organized Religion.  Fuck Politicians.  Fuck The Police.  Fuck Poverty.

Fuck Sexism.  Fuck Fast Food.  Fuck Nazi Scum.  Fuck Homophobes.

Fuck Fox News.  Fuck Trump,  Fuck Driver’s Licenses.  Fuck War.  Fuck Aids.

Fuck Abstinence.  Fuck Ignorance.  Fuck The GOP.  Fuck Fear.

Fuck Pollution.  Fuck Hunting.  Fuck Hypocrisy.  Fuck Half Assed.

Fuck Insurance Companies.  Fuck Hospitals.  Fuck Opioid Pain Killers.

Fuck Flakka.  Fuck Bath Salts.  Fuck Pot Prohibition.  Fuck Order.

Fuck Power.  Fuck The Elite.  Fuck Fake. Fuck Rape.

Fuck Crime. Fuck Society. Fuck The Legal System. Fuck Washington.

Fuck Florida. Fuck Capitalism. Fuck Sports. Fuck The Education System.

Fuck Alex Jones.  Fuck Sarah Sanders. Fuck Ben Carson. Fuck Devos.

Fuck Paul Ryan. Fuck Bill O’Reilly. Fuck Sean Spencer. Fuck Kavanaugh.

Fuck Big Business. Fuck Trade Wars. Fuck Tax Breaks For Wealthy Cunts.

Fuck Doctors. Fuck Ego. Fuck Critics. Fuck Dictators. Fuck Fascists.

Fuck The System. Fuck The Man. Fuck Authority. Fuck Racism.

Fuck Scott Pruitt. Fuck Mitch “The Bitch” McConnell. Fuck Mike Pence.

Fuck AR-15’s. Fuck Mass Shootings. Fuck Anti-Semitism. Fuck Intolerance.

Fuck Bordom. Fuck Fun. Fuck Work. Fuck 401 ks. Fuck Cubicles.

Fuck Animal Abuse. Fuck Elder Abuse. Fuck Child Abuse. Fuck Lawyers.

Fuck CEOs. Fuck FaceBook. Fuck The Internet. Fuck Bullying.

Fuck Melania Trump. Fuck The Entire Trump Family Tree. Fuck Them All.

Fuck Jared Kushner. Fuck Jeff Flake. Fuck Susan Collins. Fuck Lawrenceville.

Fuck Hate. Fuck Anger. Fuck Depression. Fuck Dispare. Fuck Injustice.

Fuck ICE. Fuck Bias. Fuck TV. Fuck Apps. Fuck “Ask Your Doctor”. Fuck Debt.

Fuck Attitude. Fuck Conforming. Fuck The Powers That Be. Fuck Oil.

Fuck Putin. Fuck Gluten. Fuck Kimmy Jong-un. Fuck Pop Punk.

Fuck Ratings. Fuck The American Dream. Fuck Us All. Fuck It To Hell.

Fuck The Oscars. Fuck The Kardashians. Fuck NJ Shore Cast. Fuck Pandora.

Fuck Siri. Fuck Alexa. Fuck Apple. Fuck Bill Gates. Fuck SmartPhones.

Fuck Scams. Fuck SUVs. Fuck YouTube. Fuck Hollywood. Fuck Unoriginality.

Fuck Mundane. Fuck The Norm. Fuck Uber. Fuck Entitlement.

Fuck The Rich. Fuck Nationalists. Fuck Fine Art. Fuck Wine Snobs.

Fuck Foodies. Fuck Hipsters. Fuck Millennials. Fuck Procrastination.

Fuck Failure. Fuck Job Interviews. Fuck Public Opinion. Fuck People.

Fuck Podcasts. Fuck Materialism. Fuck Consumerism. Fuck Restrictions.

Fuck Rules. Fuck The Proud Boys. Fuck Tucker “Fucker” Carlson.

Fuck Sean “The Shithead” Spencer. Fuck Reboots. Fuck McMansions.

Fuck Desperation. Fuck Misery. Fuck Agony. Fuck Pain. Fuck Sadness.

Fuck Conflict. Fuck Hate. Fuck Love. Fuck Humanity. Fuck The World.

Fuck North Korea. Fuck Saudi Arabia. Fuck Terrorists.

Fuck Domestic Terrorism. Fuck The NRA. Fuck Teddy Nugent.

Fuck Roseanne Barr. Fuck Fox Friends. Fuck Kid “Rap” Rock.

Fuck Contracts. Fuck Banks. Fuck The Stock Market. Fuck Exclusion.

Fuck Apartheid. Fuck Lies. Fuck Deceit. Fuck Disloyalty. Fuck Traitors.

Fuck Fair Weather Fans. Fuck Advertising. Fuck Fashion. Fuck Cosmetics.

Fuck limitations. Fuck Child Molesters. Fuck Evangelicals.

Fuck Steve Bannon. Fuck Steve Miller. Fuck Lesly Graham.

Fuck Netflix. Fuck Macho. Fuck Bravado. Fuck Self Centeredness.

Fuck Corruption. Fuck Fraud. Fuck Luxury. Fuck TMZ. Fuck Country Rock.

Fuck Pro Life. Fuck Big Tobacco. Fuck Ramen Noodles. Fuck Obedience.

Fuck Tofu. Fuck Disco. Fuck Expectations. Fuck Curry. Fuck Kale.

Fuck The 90’s. Fuck Political Correctness. Fuck Orthodox.

Fuck Conventional. Fuck Crowds. Fuck Frats. Fuck Collage Sports.

Fuck Commercial Endorsements. Fuck Internet Fame. Fuck Stupidity.

Fuck Ignorance. Fuck The Box. Fuck Diets. Fuck Doctors. Fuck Credit Cards.

Fuck Cell Phone Providers. Fuck Roaming. Fuck Flying. Fuck Security.

Fuck Contradiction. Fuck Two Facedness. Fuck Cliches. Fuck Fads.

Fuck Popularity. Fuck Success. Fuck Protocol. Fuck The Standards.

Fuck Viral Videos. Fuck Stainless Steel Appliances. Fuck Garbage Disposals.

Fuck Home Owners Associations. Fuck Idiocy. Fuck Cancer.

Fuck Heart Disease. Fuck Imitations. Fuck Wannabes. Fuck Lemmings.

Fuck The Hype. Fuck Acceptance. Fuck Star Bucks. Fuck On Line  Shopping.

Fuck Drones. Fuck Robots. Fuck Artificial Intelligence. Fuck Domestication.

Fuck Elon Musk. Fuck Collage Tuitions. Fuck Tests. Fuck Evaluations.

Fuck Envy. Fuck Jealousy. Fuck The DMV. Fuck Public Transportation.

Fuck Movie Theaters. Fuck Amusement Parks. Fuck Disney.

Fuck Time. Fuck The Inevitable. Fuck Fate. Fuck Extinction. Fuck Fuck.

Fuck Interior Design. Fuck Radio. Fuck Desire. Fuck Temptation. Fuck Sex.

Fuck Infomercials. Fuck Propaganda. Fuck The Bullshit. Fuck Sarah Sanders.

Fuck Reality. Fuck Fiction. Fuck Spam (Mail). Fuck Tourists. Fuck Vaping.

Fuck Conspiracy Theories. Fuck Pretense. Fuck Definition.

Fuck Classification. Fuck Indifference. Fuck Schtick. Fuck Arrogance.

Fuck Ikea. Fuck Burning Man. Fuck Fees. Fuck Mensa. Fuck NASA.

Fuck Vegans. Fuck Celebrity Chefs. Fuck Mixology.

Fuck Pomp and Circumstance. Fuck Folly. Fuck Gasoline. Fuck Ivy League.

Fuck Superiority. Fuck The Majority. Fuck The Flock. Fuck Followers.

Fuck “Likes”. Fuck The Flue. Fuck Double Standards. Fuck Exclusivity.

Fuck Wealth. Fuck Fame. Fuck Fortune. Fuck Disbelief. Fuck Shock and Awe.

Fuck Fanatics. Fuck Zealots. Fuck Day Dreams. Fuck Salesman.

Fuck Pressure Sales. Fuck False Apologies. Fuck Cheating. Fuck Giving Up.

Fuck Whining. Fuck Bitching. Fuck Lamenting. Fuck Complaining.

Fuck Excuses. Fuck Reason. Fuck The Past. Fuck Fuck Ups. Fuck The Upside.

Fuck Feelings. Fuck Loss. Fuck Death. Fuck Life. Fuck Institutions.

Fuck Organization. Fuck Fault. Fuck Instability. Fuck Box Stores.

Fuck Self Check Out. Fuck Contradiction. Fuck Smartphone Games.

Fuck The End. Fuck The Beginning. Fuck Mark Zuckerberg.

Fuck George “Corpse Grinder” Fisher. Fuck American Idol.

Fuck Reality Shows. Fuck Greed. Fuck Contempt. Fuck Regret. Fuck Ethics.

Fuck Dennis Miller. Fuck Kellyann Conway. Fuck Artificial Shit.

Fuck Imposters. Fuck False Profits. Fuck Weaponizing Holy Scriptures.

Fuck the Repetitive. Fuck Designer Dogs. Fuck Child Beauty Pageants.

Fuck Concern. Fuck Gamers. Fuck Emo. Fuck PG-13. Fuck Merchandise.

Fuck Malls. Fuck Billboards. Fuck HBO. Fuck Amazon. Fuck Walmart.

Fuck Monopolies. Fuck Privatized Prisons. Fuck Fines.

Fuck Eating Horse Meat. Fuck Whale Hunting. Fuck Big Game Hunting.

Fuck Boarders. Fuck Land Ownership. Fuck The Government. Fuck The FCC.

Fuck The IRS. Fuck Exploitation. Fuck Drama. Fuck Fuckers. Fuck Hunger.

Fuck Knock-Offs. Fuck Non Alcoholic Beer. Fuck The “It Place”.

Fuck Internet Challenges. Fuck Posers. Fuck Light Weights.

Fuck The Mainstream.

Well I feel a bit better so back to The Grind.

Thanks for Reading,

   Les Sober