Tag: trends

YOUTUBE IS KILLING ME…

Welcome to Today’s FYB Post featuring YOU TUBE IS KILLING ME…by One of Our All Time fucking Favorite Animators/Content Creators MeatCanyon. For Those Who may be Unaware MeatCanyon’s real name is Hunter August Hancock better known by His online user name MeatCanyon. Hancock is an American Youtuber, Animator, Voice Actor, Comedian, Writer, and Director who makes Parody Animations of Popular Characters (say Sponge Bob for instance). Some viewers of MeatCanyon’s Animations  have been Described them in just One Single Word “Horrifying”. A common on going gag in Hancock’s video’s is that Something Normal or Mundane gets You Killed or Possible Worse.

One of the Main Reasons We’re such fucking Fans of MeatCanyon is He is a True Master of Mockery. MeatCanyon  has made a Myriad of Scathing Parody Videos on Famous Personalities, Popular Fictional Characters from TV/Movies, BUT the Ones where He Slams Famous People are by Far Our Favorites.  MeatCanyon has Openly Mocked Famous Fuckwits such as Asshole Elon Musk the Bratty Trust Fund Brat, The World’s Biggest Foodie Douchebag Guy Fieri, and The Absurdist One Man fucking Freak Show on the fucking Planet Nikocado Avocado for Example. Now in this Video MeatCanyon takes on YouTube in a Damning Commentary pertaining to the Youtube Platform itself, and We for One find it fucking Wildly Entertaining.

Basically We like Underdogs and let’s fucking face it in 2023 Content Creators on Youtube Ironically have become the Underdogs of the Platform.  They Supplied/Supply Youtube with an Endless Stream of TOTALLY FREE CONTENT which Youtube uses to get Advertisers. We have become well fucking Aware that Youtube over the Last Several Years has become Increasingly more Restrictive concerning it’s Ever Changing Content Guidelines. These Tightening Restrictions have put an Effective Strangle Hold on what a Content Creator can Upload to Youtube. Last fucking Month for Example Youtube Announced that if You curse in the First 15 Seconds of Your Video is INSTANTLY Branded “Unsuitable for Advertisers” which would Prevent Advertising thus Financially Cock Blocking Content Creators.  This Obviously fucks Not Only with the Content Creators can Upload but it also Directly fucks with Their Income/Finances as Well. We personally Think the Whole Monetization System is just Bullshit, BUT We do Understand with the Highly Competitive Market being a YouTuber has become Expensive.  To Stay Competitive and Viable on the Platform YouTubers now Essentially have to Buy the Latest (and Most Expensive) Equipment. The Days of a Singular Light and Recording on One’s Cell Phone are LONG Gone as Production Value becomes More and More Relevant to Keep Up with Competitors.

Now incase You’re Wondering on what Grounds would Youtube Demonetize a Videos Now a Days and the Answer is PAINFULLY fucking Simple. Take the New Crackdown of Cursing which includes the No Cursing in the First 15 Seconds of a Video Rule. The Rule again is Curse in the 1st 15 Seconds then the Video is NOT SUITABLE for Advertisements, and if You Curse in the 1st 7 Seconds the Video is Demonetized. Youtube claims the New Language Rules are Meant to Ensure that Uploaded Videos are “SUITABLE FOR ADVERTISERS”. Let that Shit sink in for a fucking Minute.

The Bottomline here is Youtubers are Demonetized when Their Content is DEEMED NOT SUITABLE FOR ADS. What’s Our Point? Our Point is in the Beginning Youtube was a Fairly Decent Platform with Amazing Potential, and Actually Provided some Sort of Support for the Content Creators. Then like fucking Everything in fucking Life Money entered the Picture and Greed came Following Right After. So Youtube  Who gets Their Content for FREE Mind You No Longer gives a Shit, Rat’s Ass, or Flying Fuck about the Content Creators or Their Content. Youtube has become the Advertisers Obedient Bitch waiting like a Loyal little Lap Dog  at the Advertisers Beck and Call Bending to Their every Whim.

In Response to Youtube’s Constantly Changing and Increasingly Restrictive Rules/Policies We noticed a Trend Evolving in the Youtuber Community. At First Some Bigger Channels with Around a Million to Five Plus Million Subscribers would Tell the Viewer to Check Out Their Twitch Channel for Unedited, Uncensored, Videos taken Down by or Demonetized by Youtube, and Full Length Videos. This seemed Rather fucking Odd since Twitch is a Gaming/Gamer Platform, BUT the Reason These Content Creators were Suddenly Pitching Twitch made all the fucking sense in the World. The Youtube Content Creators were Using Twitch as an Additional or Alternate Platform for Their Content that’s been Shit Canned for One Reason or Another by Youtube. Then the Trend Changed and Twitch Fell by the Wayside as the Youtubers Searched for a Solution to Their Youtube Problems. Patreon has Apparently become the Number One Alternative Go To Platform  for Frustrated/Aggravated/Annoyed/Pissed Off Content Creators. So One has to Wonder What is it about Patreon that’s so Appealing that More and More Youtubers are Moving and Promoting Their Content on the Patreon Platform?!

Well while Youtube is Free with Ads They’re at the Mercy of the Advertisers and Grovels Shamelessly at the Their Feet Patreon uses a Paid Membership Model. For those Who may Have Been Living under a Rock with Their Heads up Their Asses Patreon is a Crowdfunding Platform that Enables Fans to Pay and Support Content Creators and Their Work. And so Once again Money is the Bottomline in that Patreon is Simply a Better Option than Youtube because Members Donate to the Content Creators Directly and They receive a Higher Percent of the Members Donations. This Allows Patreon to Operate without Depending on Advertiser’s Dollars which would render Patreon like Youtube into a Sniveling Slave to the Advertiser’s Almighty Dollar.

   

It seems Utterly fucking Insane to Us that Youtube has become So Prioritized with Their Profits that They’re Actually causing some of the Biggest Channels on the Platform to Jumping Ship. For Example this Particular MeatCanyon Video Alone Racked up 1.5 Million Views in the First 24 Hors after being Uploaded. Not to Mention but it Helps that MeatCanyon has 5.6 Million Subscribers on His Main Channel and Over a Million on His Second Channel. Youtube is Literally Banking on Longevity alone to Survive and Thrive in the Face of Growing Competition. Youtube just like Amazon, Facebook, and Twitter All Who’s Reputations have Plummeted Straight down the Shitter are Relying on Their Addictive Nature.

That’s to Say in Spite of all the fucked up and Foul shit the Previously mentioned Social Media Platforms are Involved in People will Continue to Use Their shit No Matter What. People are so fucking Fake that During the Day They talk shit about these Platforms/Companies and How bad They are, BUT by Night behind Closed Doors They’re still using Them Every goddamn Day. Unfortunately it Follows Human Behavior to a Tee since People Know Booze, Drugs, Gambling Etc. are Bad well We’ll put it this way a Crackhead is Gonna Smoke Crack.

 

 

It is What it Is,

 Presented By Les Sober

PUMPKIN SPICE – White Woman Season

Welcome to Today’s FYB Post featuring PUMPKIN SPICE – WHITE WOMAN SEASON byOne of Our Favorite Animators Meatcanyon. MeatCanyon’s real name is Hunter August Hancock better know by His online user name MeatCanyon. Hancock is an American Youtuber, Animator, Voice Actor, Comedian, Writer, and Director who makes Parody Animations of Popular Characters (say Sponge Bob for instance). Some viewers of MeatCanyon’s Animations  have been Described them in just One Single Word “Horrifying”. A common on going gag in Hancock’s video’s is that Something Normal or Mundane gets You Killed or Possible Worse.

                        

One of the Key Reasons We get a Real fucking Kick Out of this Particular MeatCanyon Cartoons is the Social Commentary. First Off Let’s all fucking Face it this Pumpkin Spice Obsession that People have is Way the Hell Out of Control at this Point. It was Annoying Enough when it was just Fucking Starbucks (or Starbucks as We refer to Them as) Pimped Their Pumpkin Spice Coffee every fucking October Relentlessly. Then every Other Motherfucker started Peddling a Pumpkin Spice Version of Their fucking Products from Coffee Creamer to Spam. Yeah that’s fucking Right fucking SPAM the Infamous Canned fucking Meat adds Pumpkin Spice to the Ears and Assholes or Whatever Meat Scrap Dog Food They Use. Again I Think We all can fucking Agree when there is a Pumpkin Spice Spam shit has Gone WAY TOO fucking Far.

Now as Far as Starbucks is Concerned its Nothing More than a Caffeine Fueled Scam. Coffee is Simply Hot Water Filtered through fucking Coffee Bean Grounds so Essentially it’s Hot Caffeinated Coffee Flavored fucking Water. And We could care the fuck Less about all the Bullshit Gimmicks (There Others then just the Pumpkin Spice Shit) like Whip Cream Topping, Sprinkle of fucking Cinnamon, Adding Caramel fucking Drizzle it’s all Horseshit. Also We Do Not Give a Flying fuck that They call Their Employees as fucking Baristas or That They sell fucking Fruit. Not to Mention the Pathetically  Lame CDs (Yeah fucking CDs believe that Shit) by People NO ONE GIVES A RAT’S ASS ABOUT which is Why Their CD is being Sold at a Pompous Over Rated Commercialized Coffee Shop Chain.

Bottomline on this Starbucks bullshit is They try WAY TOO FUCKING HARD to come off as Some Authentic High Class Italian Coffee Shop. The Reality it’s Run by Greedy Corporate Whores and is a Americanized Wannabe Classy European/Italian Bistro when it’s just a SCAM to get Gullible Gimmick Loving Lemmings to Pay $9 for Hot Coffee Flavored Water. If Your a Starbucks Fan and get all Bent about this Please Go Butt Chug a $12 DickNip-Dipshit-Half Caff Motherfucking Mocha Latte on Us  (and Don’t forget the fucking Pumpkin Spice Asshole)!!!

Enjoy.

It is What it Is,

  Presented By Les Sober  

The King Of Mukbang

WELCOME To MUKBANG MONDAY here at FYB featuring THE KING OF MUKBANG By one of our FAVORITE animators Meatcanyon! MeatCanyon’s real name is Hunter August Hancock better know by his online user name MeatCanyon. Hancock is an American Youtuber, animator, voice actor, comedian, writer, and director who makes parody animations of popular characters (say Sponge Bob for instance). Some viewers of MeatCanyon’s animations  have been described them in just one single word “Horrifying”. A common on going gag in Hancock’s video’s is that something normal or mundane gets you killed or possible worse.

So what the fuck is Mukbang you ask? Well allow me to enlighten you!  Mukbang is originated in 2011 in South Korea where cooking shows air more footage of the host EATING the food than the cooking of it. Mukbang is an internet fad that evolved from the South Korean Cooking shows but with Mukbang  there NO cooking what so fucking ever its ALL about the consumption. This seriously fucking bizarre fad allows people get paid for BINGE EATING so they can BUY MORE food for future videos/livestreams to get further donations from their members and viewing audience.

So in a nut shell Mukbang is people watching OTHER people eat large amount so various foods on camera. Why? I have no fucking clue. Honestly it doesn’t seem like a fucking fad or hipster trend to my anyways. As far as I’m fucking concerned Mukbang is some sort of food based fetish (which Yes are a thing and there several different varieties of these fetishes), but that’s just my humble fucking opinion.

Plot: What happens to an Mukbang Star discovers his overindulgence can be REALITY ALTERING AND DEADLY!

See you when I see you,

   Justin Sane  

Seriously Sick Sunday Cinema: SUICIDE CLUB

FYB Sick Sunday Cinema is Ecstatic to Present the 2001 Japanese Independent Dark Satirical Horror Movie SUICIDE CLUB Written and Directed by Sion Sono.

           

Suicide Club (known as Suicidal Circle in Japan) gained a Considerable amount of Notoriety in Film Festivals around the World for its Controversial, Transgressive Subject Matter and Overall Gruesome Presentation. The Movie has Developed a Significant Cult Following over the Years, and Won the Jury Prize for “Most Ground Breaking Film” at the 2003 Fantasia Film Festival.

           

Brief Plot Summery:

The Movie Begins with the GRISLY SPECTACLE of 54 Teenage School Girls commit Mass Suicide by Jumping in Unison in Front of an Oncoming Train. This appears to be Only the Beginning of a Wave of Suicides that Sweeps across Japan, Baffling the Police and Panicking the Populace. Shortly After the Schoolgirl Suicides Two Nurses at a Hospital Commit Suicide by Jumping Out a Window. At Both Locations, ROLLS OF HUMAN SKIN are Found from the BODIES OF THE DEAD!!

Three Detectives -Kuroda, Shibusawa, and Murata- are Notified by a HACKER Named Kiyoko of a Link between the Sudden Rash of Suicides, and a Website that SHows the Number of Suicides as Red and White Circles. Does the New All  Girl Group Pop Group Dessert (Who’s Latest Hit Single has Hypnotized the Nation) have anything to do with It? Will the Suicides Ever Stop? Will the Three Detectives Uncover the Cause of the Tsunami of Suicides Plaguing Their Country???

You’ll have to Watch and See for Yourself. Enjoy

We Hope You Enjoyed SUICIDE CLUB as Much as We Did.

Thanks for Watching,

Presented By  Les Sober & FYB

Quick Quiz Could Change Your Reality

Hello Reader(s),

If You opt to take the following Quiz Please follow these Guidelines:

  • Take Your Time. This isn’t some Convoluted Cosmo Quiz.
  • Think Over Your Answers. Question Everything.
  • BE HONEST. This is not some piece of Fluff Post.
  • This Quiz Could Alter Your Perception of Reality, The World, Humanity, Your Friends, Your Family, Coworkers, Significant Others, Neighbors, The Universe, Yourself, or Life & Death Permanently.
  • Pictures Have Been Added For The Purpose of Stimulating The Your Pre Frontal Cortex While Taking The Quiz.

For those reasons the ANSWER KEY won’t be Posted for a couple to a few Days as again it pays dividends to TAKE YOUR TIME, BE SURE OF YOUR ANSWERS, and BE HONEST (Otherwise Your Only Going To Fool Yourself, and the Quiz will be NULL & VOID.

   

1. Would You Ever Buy Something Off The Dark Web?                                                 A. Sure Why Not?!                                                                                                                        B. No Seems Like A Bad Idea.                                                                                                C. OH HELL YEAH, I’m An Asshole Who Lives Dangerously and Has No Fear Of Death!                                                                                                                                       D. OH HELL NO, I Don’t Want End Up In Prison.

2. Even If Its Prepared Correctly By A Master Sushi Chef Japanese Blow Fish or Fugu still has a 1 in 66 chance of Death When Eaten. Would You Ever Try Fugu?                                                                                                                                              A.  Yes I’ve Heard Its Tasty.                                                                                                    B.  No Thanks I Don’t Have a Death Wish.                                                                      C. I Know What Fire IS So I Don’t Eat Raw Fish. I’m An Asshole.                         D.  What The Fuck Is Wrong With This Red Lobster?!

3.When You Go To The Adult Store Do You…                                                                 A. Buy Something.                                                                                                                     B. Look Around Briefly And Leave.                                                                                    C. Realize You Could Have Done Your Adult Shopping Online.                             D.  I Don’t Indulge In Any Porn or Adult Store Merchandise, and I’m a Lying. I’m an Asshole.

     

4. What Kind of Pet Person Are You?                                                                                A. Rodents (Rats, Mice, Gerbils, Hamsters, Guine Pigs) Because I Forgot About The Black Plague                                                                                                          B.  Dog, Their Mankind’s Best Friend For A Reason.                                                 C.  Cat, They Were Worshiped Egyptians and They Had Pyramids so Thats Cool..                                                                                                                                               D. Fish. I’m a Simple Person Keeping It Simple.                                                          E. Bird. I’m a Masochist.                                                                                                         F. Reptiles. Dinosaurs Baby, Living Fucking DINOSAURS!                                     G. Unconventional (Pot Bellied Pig, Miniature Goat, Tarantulas, Scorpions, Hedgehog etc. I Was Born Without A Identity so Now My Identity Is My Pet. Also I’m An Asshole.

5. What Kind Of Motor Vehicle Is Your Type “Dream Car” ?                                  A. Sports: Speed Kills So Lets Die Fast!                                                                            B. SUV: I’ve Always Wondered What It Be Like To Be a Godzilla Sized Asshole.                                                                                                                                          C. Luxury: I’m a Rich Fat Bastard, and I Want The World To KNOW IT!          D. Truck: Bigger The Truck Littler The Man (Height and Penis)                         E. Motorcycle: Because Car Crashes Can’t Kill You Fast Enough.                         F. Moped/Scooter: I Like Motorcycles, But I’m Too Scared To Own One.

6. What Is Your Preferred Type/Style of Music?                                                          A. Heavy Metal: What I’m Middle Aged and Nostalgic.                                            B.  EMO: I’m Dark, Brooding, Deep and Clinically Depressed.                              C. Classic Rock: I’m a Hippy Hangover From 1969.                          D.Death/Black Metal: We Are All Going To Hell & I Have The Soundtrack!     E. Folk: I’m Heavily Medicated.                                                                                           F. Jazz: I Like Things That Sounds Like Schizophrenia Put To Music.              G. Pop: I’m a Mindless Commercial Lemming.                                                           H. Classical: I Like To Think I’m An Intellectual, I Listen To NPR.                      I. Punk: I Refuse To Admit Punk IS DEAD.                                                                       J. EMD: I’m a Bot.                                                                                                                      K.  Country: I Don’t Mind The Hypocrisy and Commercialism because I Like Horses and Playing Cowboys and Indians.                                                                     L. Talk Radio/Podcasts: I Didn’t Understand The Question, and I’m an Asshole.  

      

7. When Its Comes To Social Media Do You………                                                         A. I Check Once and a While, I Like Keeping Tabs On Shit.                                     B. I Check It Frequently and Often Because I Need To Stay In The Loop.          C. I Check It  CONSTANTLY I CAN’T AFFORD TO MISS A GODDAMN THING  D. I LIVE in Social Media, I’ve Fully Exited Physical Reality                                  E. I DON’T Check Because I Enjoy My Real Actual Life. Shove Second Life Up Your Avatar’s Ass.

        

8. What Kind Of Movies Do You Prefer To Watch?                                                      A. Horror: I’m a Sick and Twisted Little Puppy                                                            B. Action: Lets Blow Some Shit Up Already!                                                                  C. Drama: Because Life Doesn’t Have Enough Drama For Me.                              D. Foreign: I’m Profound & Worldly.                                                                                E. Rom-Com: Sometimes I Need a Break From Eharmony.                                    F. Documentary: Fuck Fiction I Want to Know What Is Really Going On in The World. Fiction, Save That Shit For Mordor.                                                          G. Mockumentary: Fuck Facts I DON’T Want to Know Whats Really Going On.                                                                                                                                                   H. Comedy: The Laugh More, Live Longer Philosophy                                              I. Thriller: I Like Being Scared, BUT I Can’t Handle Hardcore Horror.               J. Rockumentary: I Don’t just Want To Listen To Bands I Want To Know All The Behind The Scenes Shit Too!    

        

9. When I Drink I………                                                                                                             A. Shots! Shots! Shots!                                                                                                            B. Break Out The Beer Bong and Lets Party.                                                                  C. Have a Glass Of Wine With Dinner.                                                                              D. Have A Few Beers To Unwind After a Long Day.                                                     E. Go To The Bar and Shut That Fucker Down.                                                              F. Binge The Frat Life and I’m an Asshole.                                                                    G. Responsibly                                                                                                                            H. Like Theres NO Tomorrow and I Have A Hallow Leg.                                            I. Drink Like My Name IS Andre The Giant.                                                                    J. Drink Night and Day Because I’m an Alcoholic.                                                      K. Drink Cocktails Because I like To Classy Up My Boozing.                                  L. I Don’t Drink because I’m probably a fucking Alien.  

10. Where Do You Aquire Your Pornography?                                                               A. YouPorn.Com                                                                                                                         B. PornHub.Com                                                                                                                        C. Alternate Free Pornography Site.                                                                                  D. I Pay For My Porn Sites Like An Asshole.                                                                   E. Offline. I’m a Dinosaur and Still By Porno Magazines because I Like Reading The Articles.  

11. When It Comes To Trends I………                                                                                  A. Follow Blindly Like a Sheep.                                                                                            B. Make Sure I Conform To The New Trend WHILE Claiming Not To Be a Trend Follower.                                                                                                                          C. Follow Half Heartedly.                                                                                                       D. I Live To Trend, I’m a Hipster Asshole.                                                                      E. I DEPEND ON TRENDS I wasn’t Born With A Personality So I Need Trends To Define Me.                                                                                                                              F. Trends Are For Twats. I’m Not a Twat.

        

12. When I Smoke Marijuana I………                                                                                   A. Puff, Puff, Pass                                                                                                                      B. Break Out The Bong and Bomb it Like Bagdad.                                                       C. Smoke Straight To The Head By Myself.                                                                    D. Call My Friends and Bust Out The Bag/ Bust Out A Bag.                                     E. Smoke The Whole Bag From Beginning To End in One Sitting Like a Super High Hedonist.                                                                                                                            F. Wake And Bake BABY!                                                                                                           G. Smoke Socially because Hey Its Free.                                                                         H. Smoke Until I’m SO STONED I have To Hold Onto A Blade Of Grass To Keep From Falling Off The Planet.                                                                                      I. Smoke Like I’m Giving Cheech and Chong a Run For Their Money.                J. Smoke Like My Names Doug Benson.                                                                          K. Smoke Like a Chimney                                                                                                       L. Smoke Like I’m Trying To Smoke Colorado Dry.                                                  M. Smoke To Unwind After Work.                                                                                     N. 24/7 Like Snoop Dog.                                                                                                         O. Smoke Until The Tellitubbies Talk To Me.                                                                P. Smoke and Run Up a $600 GrubHub Bill                                                                   Q. Smoke Old School and Roll Up A Joint                                                                        R. Smoke New School and Roll Up a Blunt.                                                                     S. I Don’t Smoke Weed I Vape it and lecture People Who Didn’t Fucking Ask How Much Better It Is For You Than Smoking Weed. I’m a Self-righteous Asshole.                                                                                                                                         T. I Smoke SO MUCH Weed I Forgot How Much I Actually Smoke.                     U. I Don’t Smoke Weed and I’m Lying.

13. Air Guitar  OR Air Drums?                                                                                               A. Air Guitar: I Mean They Based The Widely Popular Video Game Rock Band Game on The Principle Of Air Guitar!                                                                               B. Air Drums: You Wanna Really Rock, DRUM SOLO!                                                C. Air Harpsichord: I’m an Asshole                                                                                   D. I play a REAL LIFE Drums/Guitar/Other Actual Musical Instrument.   

14. When It Comes To The Government I Believe………                                             A. Love Those Bastards, Good Job and Wouldn’t Change a Thing.                      B. Its a Necessary Evil                                                                                                              C. Its Time For a REVOLUTION.                                                                                          D. The System is Broken as Fuck, Scrap Current Model and Start Over.           E. Fuck Big Brother Period.                                                                                                    F. ANARCHY Live Free & Die Free.

    

15. When I Gamble I………                                                                                                        A. Play It Safe, And Stick To The Slots Like a Senior Citizen.                                 B.  I Set a Budget Before Hand, and Then Let The Chips Fall Where They May.                                                                                                                                                 C. Play Fast and Loose Because You Only Live Once so Fuck Consequences.  D. Play Like Your Auditioning For The World Series of Poker.                              E. Until I pass Out Or Puke From All The Free Fucking Drinks.                             F. I Don’t Gamble Probably Because I’m an Asshole.

    

16. When It Comes To Racists I Believe                                                                           A. Whole Heartedly In The 1st Amendment.                                                                  B. They’re Good People, and I’m a Trump Loving MAGA ASSHOLE.                  C. Racists Are Entitled To Their Opinion.                                                                       D. Racists Are Entitled To Their Opinion Even if Its Being a Bigot.                     E. Racists Are Fucking Scumbags                                                                                       F. My Favorite Game Is “PUNCH A NAZI”

17. When It Comes To Religion I Believe………                                                               A. There Is a God and We Should fucking FEAR HIM!                                               B. The Bible is a Moral/Ethical Historical Handbook Full Of Valid Advice.      C. God MIGHT Be Real So Better Play It Safe, and Go To Church.                        D. Heaven Or Hell Religion Doesn’t Matter To Me.                                                    E. I’m a Spiritual Person, Organized Religion is Man Made.                                  F. All Hail Mermenozoid!                                                                                                       G. Cults Are Cool so Whats Up With Scientology?                                                       H. Man Created God In HIS OWN IMAGE.                                                                        I. Take EVERY WORD of My Religious Text of Choice LITERALLY Because I’m a Religious Fanatic Like an Vile Evangelical.                                                      J. Science Over Organized Religion.                                                                                      K. There is Something Bigger Than Humans, BUT its Something Like The Universe or Nature for Example.                                                                                        L. The Ancient Greeks/Romans/Egyptians Had It Right.                                       M. How Would I Know About Religion I’m a Reincarnated Flat Worm.            N. See You In The Halls of Valhalla ASSHOLES!

    

18. When It Comes To Exercise I………                                                                               A. Believe My Body Is A Temple and I’m Its Maintenance Man.                           B. I’m just a Few Pounds Overweight, And Not That Out Of Shape so Steady As She Goes.                                                                                                                                 C. I Exercise Now and Then Basically Half Ass It.                                                       D. I’m Fine Buying Fitness Equipment, and Letting It Rot Covered in Dust In My Basement/Attic/Garage as I Always Have.                                                              E. I Love Exercising I’m a Gym Rat.                                                                                   F. I’m a Fitness Fanatic, I’m Running In Place While I Read This.                      G. I Need to Exercise, But Don’t Because I always Put It Off Till Tomorrow Like An Asshole.

   

19. When I Come To The Police I Think………                                                                 A. I Believe They Are In Fact Here To Protect & Serve Us                                         B. They Police Have Some Serious Problems That Need Correction.                  C.  Blue Lives Matter, and I’m an Utter Asshole.                                                         D. The Police Are The Biggest Criminals in America.                                                E. We Should Dismantle The Police System, And Reinstitute State Militias Or Wild West Modeled Sherriff’s Like Wyatt Eurp.                                                           F. The Police Are Just High School Nerds, and Now Have a Badge so They’re The Bully Now.                                                                                                                           G. Good Cops Are A Myth.                                                                                                      H. The Police Are Useless, Vigilante Justice Is The Only Way To Go.

    

20. When It Comes To Snakes and Spiders Which Are You More Afraid Of         A. Snakes: Obviously Remember The Garden Of Eden.                                             B. Spiders: They Can Crawl Into Your Ear, Lay Eggs, and The Babies Eat Your fucking Brain.                                                                                                                              C. Both Whats Wrong With You?                                                                                        D. Neither: I’m The Asshole Exception To The Rule.

 Brought To You By Les Sober

Written By: The University of Psychological Arts, The Synaptic Society,

& The Swedish Institute of Neuropsychology Research and Development.

 

Revised By: The Cerebral Studies Foundation & The Grey Matter Grant

Edited By: The Psychological Sociology Administration of Japan

Published By: InnerSelf Incorporated, Synaptic Storm,

& The Third Eye Institute for Developmental Cerebral Research.

A Catalog Of Humanity (Respectable Version)

The line of movie patrons shuffles forward to pay $20 for the latest CGI travesty,
The mother locked in the eternal battle to control her wildly unruly children as they run around her in circles laughing, yelling in excitement and screaming at disappointment,
The aging 30 somethings that chase trends to help them feel young and relevant,
Hipsters dressed like lumberjacks stand face to face like giant bookends each holding a vaporizer the size of a laptop, and blowing copious amounts of vapor in massive clouds that envelop their entire person upon exhaling,
The homeless man’s faithful dog who waits patiently outside the liquor store as his master pops in to buy a cheap bottle of booze,
The Grocery store bag boy who’s happy to be on cart duty as it allows him to utilize his cell phone,
The Millennial who almost runs a woman over in his massive SUV because he was preoccupied posting what he ate for lunch on FaceBook,
The Latino landscaper hanging outside the check cashing store waiting to cash his paycheck after a long and laborious day that has left him reeking of roofing tar,

The teenaged boy dressed in all black and sporting a bright red mohawk holding the door open for a little old lady proving chivalry is not only alive, but can be found in the unlikeliest of people,
The shrunken old man and his tinier wife who walk to their local diner everyday for breakfast,lunch and dinner for the past 42 years,

The withered old woman wrapped in countless shawls and blankets being pushed by her home health aid as the women rants about how when she was young a world like todays would never have been allowed to exist,
The small child fighting in vain to coax his bulldog to stop sitting stubbornly in the grass to get up and finish their walk to no avail.

The bulldog sitting in the grass without a care in the world sunning himself in the mid day rays as he continues to refuse to acknowledge his child master as he stairs vacantly into bulldog oblivion,
The ragged Tomcat that saunters through the neighbor hood with his large head and giant jowls fully believing himself to be the king of his suburban kingdom,

The sinister senior citizen on the board of the local HOA standing at the end of his driveway glowering in disgust at his neighbor’s lawn for being half an inch too high,
The baby with his family dining out in a noisy chain restaurant that refuses every attempt by her parents to get her to eat because she is severely overstimulated her wide eyes of wonder scanning over her brand new world,

The cashiers that looks like their job has left the bodies lifeless transforming them into mindless drones dragging merchandise across the loudly beeping scanner eyes half shut,

The undying commitment of the college student trying to raise money for a local soup kitchen as he is overlooked by people passing by him on the sidewalk feigning ignorance at his presence, The high school student who is dragging her feet on the way home because her parents know nothing of youth today,

And at the end of they day they go their way as I go mine,
And tomorrow we all will be back fulfilling our daily routine,
And we will see each other again the next day as well,
And we will continue to live our lives side by side never acknowledging one another.

Vape On This!

Here is a run down on my views on Vaping:

First and foremost lets give credit where credit is due. The group of people who not only introduced America to Vaping ,and led to the first time Big Tobacco took a HUGE HIT in the American market was the Marijuana Smokers. While antismoking groups got larger they embraced Vaporizers (and it was the smartest move) as the new anti-smoking device and they were right. THE POINT IS THOUGH the group of people who introduced Vaping were Pot Smokers. Pot smokers learned that Vaping is much cleaner, smoother and insanely better for your lungs (Combustion out, Convection in as the heat source). So respect to the pot smoking community for bringing the biggest and best of the world of Vaping to the American people.

1. Vaping Marijuana: As stated above its cleaner, smoother and way healthier (because of Convection versus Combustion it removes impurities making it far less stressful on the lungs)

2. Vaping to Quit Smoking Tobacco: Highly effective as well as cost effective, and readily available. It truly is the greatest blessing upon the anti-smoker groups such as Truth.com as the number of tobacco smokers (present and future) plummeted to historical lows.

Side note: I quite smoking using and E-Cigerette which are quite amazing. Not only due they switch Convection for Combustion as the heat source, BUT they also replaced burning solid material (such as weed) for a oil based solution that emits water vapor in place of any smoke.

ITS IMPORTANT TO ACKNOWLEDGE E-Ciggerettes oil’s contain NICOTINE which is highly addictive and is not healthy!!! E-Cigerettes are meant to replace tobacco cigarettes AND THEN like the Patch or Nicotine Gum the user is meant to reduce the dosage of Nicotine until they are completely are weaned off entirely.

3. Vaping For Fun: (No Nicotine, just a wide variety of increasing flavors) Thats just fine, its healthy and harms no one. Go For It.

4. Vaping as a Trend: IF your one of those trendy hipster douche bags who spends ridiculous amount on of cash on those giant 1950’s sci-fi movie looking “Professional Vaporizers” that makes it looks like your holding a fucking DVD player or your entering Cloud Contests (assholes assemble at a Vape Shop and compete by seeing who can exhale the largest cloud of mist or some shit like that) PLEASE KILL YOURSELF NOW AND DO THE WORLD A FAVOR! STUPID PEOPLE WASTE OUR OXEGEN AND TAKE UP LIMITED SPACE!