We all have one at one point in our life. The true intention of the start of an attempted friendship is never that to purposely gain an enemy. We as people truly have good intentions the majority of the time.
I know. There are some people that only become your friends because of your position in life, because of your circle that they want to penetrate, your looks, your car, there are endless countless reasons that you could be used for your friendship. Maybe we all do this to some degree or another, even if you substitute these replaceable material things with that of someone’s personality. With that of a person’s inner most soul.
No, I know again. We can’t see the soul on the surface. That is why friendship can be a trial and error process. As we are younger, we are less cautious until we get hurt by another. It is very much akin to baby animals (and baby humans for that matter) who will go up to another and have unending trust in them.
That is why I believe not in original sin. Sin is taught, sin is learned. Behaviors around us are emulated. What is a sin to you, may not be a sin to me. And vice versa. Yes there are sins which an overwhelming majority knows are wrong, like murder, because they feel wrong and you would not want this happening to you. However, there are smaller things on the grand scale of things, that some people do not consider wrongs.
This therein lies where we come about the phenomenon of known as frenenemy.
You see it does not really matter, hide nor hair, of what a person’s upbringing is. It is what you surround yourself with. Your blood family can only be so much a part of this. Most of this is up to you and what you can tolerate.
I have had a few frenemies in my day. There is that old expression, “Keep your friends close, but your enemies even closer.”
But how much can we tolerate? Where is the point where we must draw the line in the sand and say stop? I am beginning to the see where this ends and where this begins on the great precipice known as reality. There is a fine line between everything sane and rational and everything “insane” and irrational. When the line is visible to all those around you sometimes it is time to call this to an end.
Yet, I wonder to myself. Were my motives selfish for associating with this person in the first place? Was there something I wanted to get out of it? Obviously I was getting something out of it as it filled my need for evil, that was mainly learned by society. There was a hole in my soul that needed a temporary patch job like putting ambisol on a cracked tooth or putting a tiny snoopy band-aid on an arm gushing with blood.
My most famous frenenemy (no he was not really famous, more like imfamous) started as my friend but after many years I only stuck around for reasons to this day I am unaware of. Perhaps I liked the pain that he brought me. Perhaps I liked the element of surprise that he brought to my life because I never knew what city I might be in or how much money he could bring me in the next night. He turned into my boss, but wow now I’m really rambling.
The point is. How long would you stick around for a frenemy? Is there any point to the mayhem?
I say. If no one is bleeding, then no one is hurt. But once you have ripped open my wounds and created new ones on top of that well then I listen to my friend Tori Amos. She says maybe it’s time to say goodbye now.
By The One and Only
SpaceDog 