Tag: vigilante justice

BLVCK MVGIC

Welcome to This Wednesday’s Post featuring the Disturbing Claymation Music Video “BLVCK MVGIC” by Artist Kill The Noise (Real Name Jacob Stanzak) Who is an American DJ and Record Producer from Rochester, New York.

The Official Video for Kill The Noises’s Song”BLVCK MVGIC” was Created by None Other than Animator and FYB Favorite Lee Hardcastle. Lee Hardcastle is an Insanely Prolific British Animator/Film Maker  Who Specializes in Stop-Motion Techniques. Lee Hardcastle in His Own Words: “I Make Claymations that are Not for Children’s Eyes.”, and has Vowed to Never Insult His Auidence with Shitty Film Making.

                     

Hardcastle is Famous for His Handmade Independent Animations. His Work includes Original Remakes of Emblematic 1980’s Action and Horror Movies, as well as Parodies of Animated Series and Video Clips. His Work is Known for its Violent and Gory Content. He has worked with Many Companies including Momentum Pictures, 20th Century Fox, and Adult Swim, and has Also Worked with Notable Artists such as Sufjan Stevens. Besides Being a Kick Ass Animator Lee Hardcastle was a Member of the Band Shit The Bed. Shit The Bed was a Hardcore Punk Band with Grindcore Tendencies  from Leeds, UK Formed in 2000 by Jordan Ramoth, Richard Kenyon, Dom Smith, and Lee Hardcastle when They were in High School.

                   

Plot: A Small Remote Village has been Played by a Rash of Missing People, and When a Villager Spots a Lone Woman living in a Corn Field with a Pentagram on Her Door. The Pentagram is actually a White Magic Symbol Designed to Protect the Homeowner from Evil. Now to Alleviate any Confusion an Inverted Pentagram is a Pentangle which is Synonymous with Modern Day Satanism. The Villagers assume She is a Witch and Responsible for the Disappearance of the Missing Villagers and Form a Violent Posse, but when They Confront the Witch Things go from Bad to Bloody.

Be Sure to Watch Until the End for The Sinister Surprise Twist.

Enjoy.

Thanks For Watching/Listening,

   Presented By Les Sober  

FYB’s First Official Endorsement: LT.LICKME

Let ME Start By Saying when it comes to bringing the Bad Guys to “Justice” the Police at Best are Incompetent, and at worst as Criminal as the Bad Guys. So it’s No Wonder Why I have a Special Fondness for Vigilante Justice be it Movies, Video Games, TV, and Best of All (and Not Often Enough) in Real Life. That brings Me to FYB’s First Official Endorsement being Awarded to Australian Content Creator/YouTuber Lt. LICKME!

Now After achieving Mass Appeal a Year Ago LT.LICKME Stoped Posting and seemed to have Utterly Disappeared. At one Point LT.LICKME Tweeted that He was leaving for a while, He couldn’t actually say Why He was Leaving, and that He would be Returning sometime in the Future. Not Only that LT.LICKME also announced in the Tweet “I cannot tell you when I will return, I cannot truly tell you why I left. But know when I do return, I will not return the same.” Following that Tweet LT.LICKME changed all Their Profiles on Social Media to a Black Profile Picture. Then a Month ago the LT. announced in a Teaser Video that He’d Be Returning Sometime in July. Yesterday (August 1st 2021) LT.LICKME released the Hands Down the Best Comeback Video I have Ever Seen No Bullshit.

                   

Before We get Started First Things First. I am Not LT. LICKME’s Biographer I’m just a Huge fucking Fan of His Work. I won’t be giving You an Insanely Detailed Account of Everything LT.LICKME, But I will Provide all of what I deem to be the Most Relevant and Informative Information. If You like what You Read/Watch here and have some Questions that were Not Addressed here then By All Means Please Research Further for Yourself. Like I said I’m a Fan, and as a Fan I will Not (And Never have Nor Will) Tell You what to Think. I believe You’re Intelligent Enough and Creative Enough to make Your Own Conclusions. Below You will find Pertinent Information about LT.LICKME and Below That there is LT.LICKME’s Return Video. If Your Interested in LT.LICKME We also included Another Video that I feel Properly Showcases LT.LICKME’s Work.

                   

Let Us Get Started.

  • Channel Description:
    “We divide the line between reality and nightmare for the “bad ones” in order to create content for your entertainment.” #LTARMY

LT.LICK ME:

  • LT.LICKME has been Active Since 2013.
  • LT.LICKME Youtube Channel Videos have a Combined  307,076,974 Total Views.
  • LT.LICKME has 3.62 Million Subs.
  • LT.LICKME has Over 99+ Videos Posted Currently.
  • LT.LICKME’s Discord has 100,000 Members
  • LT.LICKME started as a Member of Anonymous.
  • Over Time LT.LICKME Debuted a Unique Character of His Own called The Stalker.
  • In the End Anonymous and LT.LICKME went Their Parted Ways due to Anonymous taking Issue with LT.LICKME’s Techniques and Intent. Anonymous did Not Approve of LT.LICKME’s Methods, and for LT.LICKME’s part the LT. Railed Against Anonymous as Old, Out Dated, and Ineffective.

  • LT.LICKME Objective is to make the Target Suffer the Way Their Victims Suffered basically Turning the Predators (Bullies, Wife Beaters, Racists, Pedophiles, Groomers, Rapists, and Other fucked up Assholes) into Prey and Without Mercy or Apology. A Fight Fire with Fire Mentality.
  • LT.LICKME Trolling Videos: Anonymous Trolling, Stalker Trolling, Missed Call Trolling, Mr. Steal Your Girl, and Watcher Trolling.
  • LT.LICKME isn’t Afraid to Operate Well Outside the Law to accomplish the Mission.
  • LT.LICKME isn’t a One Man Show by Far having amassed a Global Network of like Minded Individuals who became Active Members in the LT. ARMY.
  • LT.LICKME utilizes People called Watchers who collect information on Targets.
  • Lt.LICKME also has what I refer to as Foot Soldiers who Operate in the Physical World doing whatever Task They are Assigned.

  • When LT.LICKME Abandoned Anonymous the LT. Created a New Character from previous Stalker to The Watcher.
  • The Most Controversial and Popular Video Series done by LT.LICKME and the LT. ARMY are the Watchers Series which are The Extremest and Most Intensely Insane (and Enjoyable) Videos to Date.
  • There are Two Watcher Videos that End with the Statement “For Deniability Reasons the Rest of the Footage can Not Be Shown Here.”

LT.LICKME RETURNS VIDEO RUN DOWN:

  • In The Video We Learn LT.LICKME No Longer stands for a Person, but a Concept/Idea which Ironically enough mirrors Anonymous.
  • LT.LICKME Rages against YouTube for becoming a Greed Driven Platform and its Monetization Agenda.
  • LT.LICK also Rails against YouTube View Whores, 3rd Rate Copycats, Uncreative YouTube Hacks and More.
  • LT.LICK ME Trashes the New School YouTubers who Don’t give a shit about Content They only care about Pursuing Fame and Fortune (Basically the “I’ll BE Rich and Famous I’m Going to be a YouTuber.” Mentality).
  • LT.LICKME introduces a New Character .
  • LT.LICKME Debuts a New Logo.
  • The Channel has Evolved into its Best Incarnation Yet.

  • The Announced at the Beginning of the Video States the Channel is “Under New Management.” whatever the fuck that means, Well have to wait and see I suppose.
  • NEW VIDEO COMING SEPTEMBER 1, 2021!
  • There have been Plenty of Theories as to Why LT.LICKME left for a Year including but Not Limited to LT.LICKME was Arrested by the Australian Police, LT.LICKME’s House was Raided by the FBI, and Even that LT.LICKME had gone to Fight in the War in Afghanistan though None of these have been Verified, its all Pure Speculation.
  • The Police/FBI Theory comes from the Narrator at the Beginning of the Video making a Statement along the Lines that LT.LICKME is just a Person and a Person can be Stopped, They can be Arrested….”

Enjoy.

We Honestly and Most Sincerely Hope You Enjoyed The LT.LICKME Videos and will Check Out More of This Creator’s Marvelous Content.

Thanks For Reading/Watching,

   Presented By Les Sober  

I’ve Seen Some Stupid Shit But This Is A New One

This Story Starts a Short While before the 2020 Election when it was Revving Up to be the Total Post Election Shit Show it is Currently. One Day I had to Run a Mundane Errand that required that I Drive over to a Near by Neighboring Town. This is a frequent Side Effect of Living in a Town So Small it Only has one Single Traffic Light is it Requires that You Travel for a wide Variety of Reasons. The Main Reason being in a Small Town You have Limited Choices (and Certain Product Availability) so Traveling to a More Populated Area becomes Part of the Chore.

This Particular Drive is Quite Scenic as it Runs Through a Mix of Pine Forrests and Farming Fields with the Odd Small House/ Mobile Home sprinkled in Here and There. The Road as one might Imagine Qualifies as the Road Less Taken since You can Drive Miles before seeing Even One Other Car on the Road. Around the Midway Point of the Journey on the right side of the Road Across from a Empty Farmer’s Field is what appears at first to be a Viable Side Street or Road if You will. It is in fact The Top of someone’s Driveway You Can’t actually see the House from the Road because it’s Hidden in a You Guessed it One Forrest. What You can See is that approximately a Quarter Mile down this Long ass Driveway is a Large Cast Iron Gate Blocking. There’s 10 Foot Brown Stone Walls on Either Side of the Gate that Start about Ten Feet High and Taper off toward the Ground. I have No Idea what the Aesthetic Brown Stones are because I’m not a fucking Geologist, but They Look Halfway Decent.

         

Now as I Mentioned this was in the Pre 2020 Election and America was in a Chaotic Frenzy. Well on this particular Day as I drove by I Noticed the Residents had Placed 25-30 Elect Trump Yard Signs about Four Feet Apart Down both sides of their Driveway.  It was Overkill in Every Sense of the Word. Now We Fast Forward the Election is Over, Biden has Been Certified by the Electoral Collage, and its been a Month and a Half Past Election Night. So the Next Time I had to had to Run an Errand Out that Way it was No Real Surprise that the Elect Trump 2020 Yard Signs had been Removed. Now on the Way into Town I Noticed a Excessively Large Banner Displayed at the Top of the Same Property where the Elect Trump 2020 signs had Previously been. I noticed it too Late to see what it Said, but I decided that right then and there that on the Way Back I would Most Definitely Find out what this Banner was all About.

On the Way Back I made sure to Slow Down (which is Easy to do on a Road with Virtually no Traffic as I mention Earlier) so I could take in the Banner in its Entirety and What I saw I found Absolutely Dumbfounding. At the Top Half of the Banner on a Dark Navy Background it Said in Big Block Letter in all Caps “TRUMP SIGN THIEVES” and there was a Phone Number displayed Under it also in Big Ass Font. The Bottom Half consisted of 3 Pictures of Three Different Cars of the Suspected Sign Thieves Vehicles, but We’ll get back to that in a Minute. It was Painfully and Blatantly Obvious that the Home Owner was 1. Die Hard Trump Supporter 2. Was Pissed as Hell about Their Elect Trump 2020 Yard Signs being Stolen. What I want to Know is What the fuck do Does the Home Owner Expect to Happen pertaining to The Stolen Yard Sign Banner?

                  

I First thought to Myself Seriously How fucking Stupid since Yard Signs Run an Average of 97 Cents to Custom Make so This Person was Out a Whopping $48.50. This is Horribly Ironic since this Banner They had made cost Them a Couple Hundred Dollars so that 3-4 times as Much as the Cost of the Yard Signs. I just figure Out if You’re Pissed about being Out $50 Why the Hell would You then Invest a Couple Hundred in an Additional Banner? I may be Shitty at Math but Even I can tell You That Doesn’t Add Up. The Only Possibly Reason I could Muster was The Home Owner Truly Believed that the Stolen Yard Sign Banner would in deed Pay Off in the End. Still the Question Remained What was the Intention of the Home Owner since They are having a rather Extreme Reaction to the Theft of Their Shitty Elect Trump 2020 Year Signs?

This is My Hypothesis on this Oddly Absurd Situation. Once the Home Owner Saw the Signs were Stolen the Enraged Idiot(s) called the fucking Local Police and Reported it. The Cops basically Blew the Hoe Owner Off due to the Ridiculous Nature of the So Called Offense. Then the Pissed Off Assholes decided They would have to take Matter into Their Own Hands with Their Bizarre Brand of Vigilante Justice. They then had to Spend some Time coming up with a Course of Action and in The End They settled on Big Ass Bullshit Banner. Next They had to go to a Graphics Shop and have the Banner made and again Pay a Few Hundred Dollars for it. After that They returned Home and Erected the Batshit Banner at the Top of Their Driveway, and I assume are Still Waiting for the Banner to yield Results.

At this Point I’d like to Readdress the 3 Large Blown Up Pictures of the Alleged Sign Thieves Vehicles. The First Thing I’d like to Address is the Fact that These Pictures are so Shitty and Off Point its fucking Mind Boggling. What I mean is all Three Picture are Utterly Useless since NO INFORMATION can be deduced from Them. You See Each Picture Failed to Catch the Car’s License Plate which is in the Second Chapter of “The Big Book of Duh”.  Since all the Photos are Shot at Insanely Strange Angles You also have No Chance to possible See the Driver or Anyone Else Who Might be in the Car. For all Intents and Purposes the Pics look like they were taken by a Drone that was being Operated by The Clueless Village Idiot. I say this because Not Only  all the Car Photos Void of Any Pertinent Information Whatsoever the Picture seem to have been taken From Above at Random Angles. It’s Almost as if the Camera was Basically Shooting Down from Above the Cars.

Not to Mention the Fact The Home Owner had Photos (as Shitty as They Were) actually had Photos since where the fuck was the Camera Located in the First Place? With a Vast and Empty FArmer’s Field across the Road from the Property there is No Where to Attach any Type of Camera since Theres Literally Nothing to Attach it too. This Must Mean the Camera would have to have Been Mounted on the Same side of the Street as the Home Owner’s Property. The Issue there is again Where was the Camera Located? My Wife Theorized the Pictures were Caught by a Security Camera at the Gate. The Problem with that is as I said the Gate is a Quarter Mile Down from the Road, and since the Yard Signs were running down the Sides of the Main Road the Camera couldn’t see Shit to take a Picture.

                  

The Next Option would have been the Most Likely in Most Cases. We live in a Rural ass Area where Hunting and Fishing are as Big as Professional Sports, and Most Hunters Use Motion Activated Trail Cameras to Surveil Perspective Hunting Territory for Game. Thus it would make the Most Sense if Someone mounted a Trail Camera or Perhaps Several to the Pine Trees that Comprise the Forrest on the Home Owner’s Property. The Only Problem with the Stolen Sign Situation is a Trail Camera Would Have to be Mounted at the Same Hight as the Cars, and Not 15 feet up the Trunk of the Tree since its Motion Activated (and You’d want to Photograph Cars Not Birds Flying in the Distance). Thats How I came to the Only Reason I could Think of which is it was a Drone Camera but Who fucking Knows.

As for the Intent of the Banner I am Equally as Clueless as I still can’t Deduct what the fuck the Home Owner thinks is going to Happen as a Result of Their Banner? The Police aren’t going to be of any Assistance due to it being No Where Near a Priority, and The Only Evidence is the Three aforementioned Crappy Photos a 3 Cars that contain Nothing of Value as far as Information. So is the Home Owner Honestly expecting that some Stranger Driving down the Main Road Outside of their Property, See the Banner, and Somehow be Able to Identify One of the Cars. This is Already a Never Going to Happen Hell or High Water Situation, but I’ll Play Devil’s Advocate for the Sake of Argument.

                

Let’s Say Someone did see the Banner and All That the Home Owner is Banking on that Person Giving as Big as a Shit about the Stolen Signs as the Owner. The Stranger would have to be Equally as Enraged over a Case of Stolen Yard Signs to even Give a Shit. If it were Me and I saw the Banner and Actually Knew One of the Cars (“Oh Shit Thats Phil’s Car!”) the Next time I saw the Car Owner I’d tell Him how Hilarious I find the Whole thing and Way to Go. Point Being the Last damn thing I’d do is call the Number on the Sign I simply wouldn’t Say Shit. Lastly even if the Home Owner found Out Who the Cars Belong To fuck are They Going to Do? There’s really No Legal Recourse (just ask the Cops who were annoyed by the Reporting of this Piddly Shit) so They could Only do One of Two Things.

Option One is to Tell Everyone around since Word Travels fast in a Small Town where Everybody Knows Everybody. This would be to Call the Culprit Out and Publicly Shame Them in the Eyes of Their Friends, Family, and Community (Most of Which are Avid Church Goers so “Thou Shall Not Steal’). I also Suppose in this Day and Age They could do the Same by Talking Shit on Social Media to Vent as well as Call Out the Guilty Party. If the Home Owner is a real Dicks They could Go Over to the Alleged Guilty Person’s Residence and Address the Matter Face to Face. This would Not be a Safe Decision since the Home Owner Would Either End Up In Jail for Showing Up and Acting like a World Class Asshole or For Killing the Supposedly Guilty Person. That or They End up Getting Shot, Beaten to a Bloody Pulp  or Killed Themselves. Anyway You Slice it it Always Ends Badly for the Idiotic Home Owner. So the Question Remains the Same: What the Fuck is the Point?

Besides it being an Utter Absurdity of the Situation I’m just Relieved it s something Entertaining instead of Asinine. I mean at Least it wasn’t a Situation like This Old Cranky Bastard that Lives in My Neighborhood Who is Still Flying His Elect Trump Flag like an Absolute Asshole.

Thanks For Reading,

By Les Sober  

Saturday Slasher Cinema: MANIAC COP 2

Welcome to Another Edition of Saturday Slasher Cinema Featuring the 1990 Action Slasher Film MANIAC COP 2 Directed by William Lustig and Written by Larry Cohen. It Stars Robert Davi, Claudia Christian, Michael Lerner, and B Horror Icon Bruce Campbell, with Robert Z’Dar returning as MATHEW CORDELL, an Undead Police Officer Turned Serial Killer following His Murder.

               

Plot Summary:

Murderous Renegade Police Officer Matthew Cordell once Roamed the Streets of New York City Unleashing His Brutal Brand of Vigilante Justice upon Its Citizens. The Supernatural Cordell is Struck Down and Killed by Good Guy Hero Cop Jack Forrest (Bruce Campbell) Ending His Sadistic Killing Spree. Now, Forrest is Eager to Move On from those Heinous Events , but He is Stopped in His Tracks when an All Too Familiar Homicidal Rampage Begins. Thought to be Dead and Gone, Cordell Returns Once Again from Beyond the Grave, and Ready to Wreak His Merciless Havoc Once More. This Time However Cordell has Help from a Times Square Serial Killer named Steven Turkell Who has a Penchant for Strangling Strippers. Cordell has returned Targeting the Vicious Criminals (and Anyone that Gets in His Way) that Mutilated and Murdered Him after He was Framed by a Corrupt City Hall.

               

Will Cordell get His Revenge at Last and Rest in Peace once and For all, or will Cordell’s Psychotic Slaughterfest be Ended Once Again By Hero Cop Jack  thus Sending Cordell Straight Back to Hell?!

You’ll have to Watch and See for Yourself.

Enjoy.

We Hope You Enjoyed this Sequel of Slaughter by a Killer Cop as Much as We Did.

Thanks For Watching,

Presented By Les Sober  

Quick Quiz Could Change Your Reality

Hello Reader(s),

If You opt to take the following Quiz Please follow these Guidelines:

  • Take Your Time. This isn’t some Convoluted Cosmo Quiz.
  • Think Over Your Answers. Question Everything.
  • BE HONEST. This is not some piece of Fluff Post.
  • This Quiz Could Alter Your Perception of Reality, The World, Humanity, Your Friends, Your Family, Coworkers, Significant Others, Neighbors, The Universe, Yourself, or Life & Death Permanently.
  • Pictures Have Been Added For The Purpose of Stimulating The Your Pre Frontal Cortex While Taking The Quiz.

For those reasons the ANSWER KEY won’t be Posted for a couple to a few Days as again it pays dividends to TAKE YOUR TIME, BE SURE OF YOUR ANSWERS, and BE HONEST (Otherwise Your Only Going To Fool Yourself, and the Quiz will be NULL & VOID.

   

1. Would You Ever Buy Something Off The Dark Web?                                                 A. Sure Why Not?!                                                                                                                        B. No Seems Like A Bad Idea.                                                                                                C. OH HELL YEAH, I’m An Asshole Who Lives Dangerously and Has No Fear Of Death!                                                                                                                                       D. OH HELL NO, I Don’t Want End Up In Prison.

2. Even If Its Prepared Correctly By A Master Sushi Chef Japanese Blow Fish or Fugu still has a 1 in 66 chance of Death When Eaten. Would You Ever Try Fugu?                                                                                                                                              A.  Yes I’ve Heard Its Tasty.                                                                                                    B.  No Thanks I Don’t Have a Death Wish.                                                                      C. I Know What Fire IS So I Don’t Eat Raw Fish. I’m An Asshole.                         D.  What The Fuck Is Wrong With This Red Lobster?!

3.When You Go To The Adult Store Do You…                                                                 A. Buy Something.                                                                                                                     B. Look Around Briefly And Leave.                                                                                    C. Realize You Could Have Done Your Adult Shopping Online.                             D.  I Don’t Indulge In Any Porn or Adult Store Merchandise, and I’m a Lying. I’m an Asshole.

     

4. What Kind of Pet Person Are You?                                                                                A. Rodents (Rats, Mice, Gerbils, Hamsters, Guine Pigs) Because I Forgot About The Black Plague                                                                                                          B.  Dog, Their Mankind’s Best Friend For A Reason.                                                 C.  Cat, They Were Worshiped Egyptians and They Had Pyramids so Thats Cool..                                                                                                                                               D. Fish. I’m a Simple Person Keeping It Simple.                                                          E. Bird. I’m a Masochist.                                                                                                         F. Reptiles. Dinosaurs Baby, Living Fucking DINOSAURS!                                     G. Unconventional (Pot Bellied Pig, Miniature Goat, Tarantulas, Scorpions, Hedgehog etc. I Was Born Without A Identity so Now My Identity Is My Pet. Also I’m An Asshole.

5. What Kind Of Motor Vehicle Is Your Type “Dream Car” ?                                  A. Sports: Speed Kills So Lets Die Fast!                                                                            B. SUV: I’ve Always Wondered What It Be Like To Be a Godzilla Sized Asshole.                                                                                                                                          C. Luxury: I’m a Rich Fat Bastard, and I Want The World To KNOW IT!          D. Truck: Bigger The Truck Littler The Man (Height and Penis)                         E. Motorcycle: Because Car Crashes Can’t Kill You Fast Enough.                         F. Moped/Scooter: I Like Motorcycles, But I’m Too Scared To Own One.

6. What Is Your Preferred Type/Style of Music?                                                          A. Heavy Metal: What I’m Middle Aged and Nostalgic.                                            B.  EMO: I’m Dark, Brooding, Deep and Clinically Depressed.                              C. Classic Rock: I’m a Hippy Hangover From 1969.                          D.Death/Black Metal: We Are All Going To Hell & I Have The Soundtrack!     E. Folk: I’m Heavily Medicated.                                                                                           F. Jazz: I Like Things That Sounds Like Schizophrenia Put To Music.              G. Pop: I’m a Mindless Commercial Lemming.                                                           H. Classical: I Like To Think I’m An Intellectual, I Listen To NPR.                      I. Punk: I Refuse To Admit Punk IS DEAD.                                                                       J. EMD: I’m a Bot.                                                                                                                      K.  Country: I Don’t Mind The Hypocrisy and Commercialism because I Like Horses and Playing Cowboys and Indians.                                                                     L. Talk Radio/Podcasts: I Didn’t Understand The Question, and I’m an Asshole.  

      

7. When Its Comes To Social Media Do You………                                                         A. I Check Once and a While, I Like Keeping Tabs On Shit.                                     B. I Check It Frequently and Often Because I Need To Stay In The Loop.          C. I Check It  CONSTANTLY I CAN’T AFFORD TO MISS A GODDAMN THING  D. I LIVE in Social Media, I’ve Fully Exited Physical Reality                                  E. I DON’T Check Because I Enjoy My Real Actual Life. Shove Second Life Up Your Avatar’s Ass.

        

8. What Kind Of Movies Do You Prefer To Watch?                                                      A. Horror: I’m a Sick and Twisted Little Puppy                                                            B. Action: Lets Blow Some Shit Up Already!                                                                  C. Drama: Because Life Doesn’t Have Enough Drama For Me.                              D. Foreign: I’m Profound & Worldly.                                                                                E. Rom-Com: Sometimes I Need a Break From Eharmony.                                    F. Documentary: Fuck Fiction I Want to Know What Is Really Going On in The World. Fiction, Save That Shit For Mordor.                                                          G. Mockumentary: Fuck Facts I DON’T Want to Know Whats Really Going On.                                                                                                                                                   H. Comedy: The Laugh More, Live Longer Philosophy                                              I. Thriller: I Like Being Scared, BUT I Can’t Handle Hardcore Horror.               J. Rockumentary: I Don’t just Want To Listen To Bands I Want To Know All The Behind The Scenes Shit Too!    

        

9. When I Drink I………                                                                                                             A. Shots! Shots! Shots!                                                                                                            B. Break Out The Beer Bong and Lets Party.                                                                  C. Have a Glass Of Wine With Dinner.                                                                              D. Have A Few Beers To Unwind After a Long Day.                                                     E. Go To The Bar and Shut That Fucker Down.                                                              F. Binge The Frat Life and I’m an Asshole.                                                                    G. Responsibly                                                                                                                            H. Like Theres NO Tomorrow and I Have A Hallow Leg.                                            I. Drink Like My Name IS Andre The Giant.                                                                    J. Drink Night and Day Because I’m an Alcoholic.                                                      K. Drink Cocktails Because I like To Classy Up My Boozing.                                  L. I Don’t Drink because I’m probably a fucking Alien.  

10. Where Do You Aquire Your Pornography?                                                               A. YouPorn.Com                                                                                                                         B. PornHub.Com                                                                                                                        C. Alternate Free Pornography Site.                                                                                  D. I Pay For My Porn Sites Like An Asshole.                                                                   E. Offline. I’m a Dinosaur and Still By Porno Magazines because I Like Reading The Articles.  

11. When It Comes To Trends I………                                                                                  A. Follow Blindly Like a Sheep.                                                                                            B. Make Sure I Conform To The New Trend WHILE Claiming Not To Be a Trend Follower.                                                                                                                          C. Follow Half Heartedly.                                                                                                       D. I Live To Trend, I’m a Hipster Asshole.                                                                      E. I DEPEND ON TRENDS I wasn’t Born With A Personality So I Need Trends To Define Me.                                                                                                                              F. Trends Are For Twats. I’m Not a Twat.

        

12. When I Smoke Marijuana I………                                                                                   A. Puff, Puff, Pass                                                                                                                      B. Break Out The Bong and Bomb it Like Bagdad.                                                       C. Smoke Straight To The Head By Myself.                                                                    D. Call My Friends and Bust Out The Bag/ Bust Out A Bag.                                     E. Smoke The Whole Bag From Beginning To End in One Sitting Like a Super High Hedonist.                                                                                                                            F. Wake And Bake BABY!                                                                                                           G. Smoke Socially because Hey Its Free.                                                                         H. Smoke Until I’m SO STONED I have To Hold Onto A Blade Of Grass To Keep From Falling Off The Planet.                                                                                      I. Smoke Like I’m Giving Cheech and Chong a Run For Their Money.                J. Smoke Like My Names Doug Benson.                                                                          K. Smoke Like a Chimney                                                                                                       L. Smoke Like I’m Trying To Smoke Colorado Dry.                                                  M. Smoke To Unwind After Work.                                                                                     N. 24/7 Like Snoop Dog.                                                                                                         O. Smoke Until The Tellitubbies Talk To Me.                                                                P. Smoke and Run Up a $600 GrubHub Bill                                                                   Q. Smoke Old School and Roll Up A Joint                                                                        R. Smoke New School and Roll Up a Blunt.                                                                     S. I Don’t Smoke Weed I Vape it and lecture People Who Didn’t Fucking Ask How Much Better It Is For You Than Smoking Weed. I’m a Self-righteous Asshole.                                                                                                                                         T. I Smoke SO MUCH Weed I Forgot How Much I Actually Smoke.                     U. I Don’t Smoke Weed and I’m Lying.

13. Air Guitar  OR Air Drums?                                                                                               A. Air Guitar: I Mean They Based The Widely Popular Video Game Rock Band Game on The Principle Of Air Guitar!                                                                               B. Air Drums: You Wanna Really Rock, DRUM SOLO!                                                C. Air Harpsichord: I’m an Asshole                                                                                   D. I play a REAL LIFE Drums/Guitar/Other Actual Musical Instrument.   

14. When It Comes To The Government I Believe………                                             A. Love Those Bastards, Good Job and Wouldn’t Change a Thing.                      B. Its a Necessary Evil                                                                                                              C. Its Time For a REVOLUTION.                                                                                          D. The System is Broken as Fuck, Scrap Current Model and Start Over.           E. Fuck Big Brother Period.                                                                                                    F. ANARCHY Live Free & Die Free.

    

15. When I Gamble I………                                                                                                        A. Play It Safe, And Stick To The Slots Like a Senior Citizen.                                 B.  I Set a Budget Before Hand, and Then Let The Chips Fall Where They May.                                                                                                                                                 C. Play Fast and Loose Because You Only Live Once so Fuck Consequences.  D. Play Like Your Auditioning For The World Series of Poker.                              E. Until I pass Out Or Puke From All The Free Fucking Drinks.                             F. I Don’t Gamble Probably Because I’m an Asshole.

    

16. When It Comes To Racists I Believe                                                                           A. Whole Heartedly In The 1st Amendment.                                                                  B. They’re Good People, and I’m a Trump Loving MAGA ASSHOLE.                  C. Racists Are Entitled To Their Opinion.                                                                       D. Racists Are Entitled To Their Opinion Even if Its Being a Bigot.                     E. Racists Are Fucking Scumbags                                                                                       F. My Favorite Game Is “PUNCH A NAZI”

17. When It Comes To Religion I Believe………                                                               A. There Is a God and We Should fucking FEAR HIM!                                               B. The Bible is a Moral/Ethical Historical Handbook Full Of Valid Advice.      C. God MIGHT Be Real So Better Play It Safe, and Go To Church.                        D. Heaven Or Hell Religion Doesn’t Matter To Me.                                                    E. I’m a Spiritual Person, Organized Religion is Man Made.                                  F. All Hail Mermenozoid!                                                                                                       G. Cults Are Cool so Whats Up With Scientology?                                                       H. Man Created God In HIS OWN IMAGE.                                                                        I. Take EVERY WORD of My Religious Text of Choice LITERALLY Because I’m a Religious Fanatic Like an Vile Evangelical.                                                      J. Science Over Organized Religion.                                                                                      K. There is Something Bigger Than Humans, BUT its Something Like The Universe or Nature for Example.                                                                                        L. The Ancient Greeks/Romans/Egyptians Had It Right.                                       M. How Would I Know About Religion I’m a Reincarnated Flat Worm.            N. See You In The Halls of Valhalla ASSHOLES!

    

18. When It Comes To Exercise I………                                                                               A. Believe My Body Is A Temple and I’m Its Maintenance Man.                           B. I’m just a Few Pounds Overweight, And Not That Out Of Shape so Steady As She Goes.                                                                                                                                 C. I Exercise Now and Then Basically Half Ass It.                                                       D. I’m Fine Buying Fitness Equipment, and Letting It Rot Covered in Dust In My Basement/Attic/Garage as I Always Have.                                                              E. I Love Exercising I’m a Gym Rat.                                                                                   F. I’m a Fitness Fanatic, I’m Running In Place While I Read This.                      G. I Need to Exercise, But Don’t Because I always Put It Off Till Tomorrow Like An Asshole.

   

19. When I Come To The Police I Think………                                                                 A. I Believe They Are In Fact Here To Protect & Serve Us                                         B. They Police Have Some Serious Problems That Need Correction.                  C.  Blue Lives Matter, and I’m an Utter Asshole.                                                         D. The Police Are The Biggest Criminals in America.                                                E. We Should Dismantle The Police System, And Reinstitute State Militias Or Wild West Modeled Sherriff’s Like Wyatt Eurp.                                                           F. The Police Are Just High School Nerds, and Now Have a Badge so They’re The Bully Now.                                                                                                                           G. Good Cops Are A Myth.                                                                                                      H. The Police Are Useless, Vigilante Justice Is The Only Way To Go.

    

20. When It Comes To Snakes and Spiders Which Are You More Afraid Of         A. Snakes: Obviously Remember The Garden Of Eden.                                             B. Spiders: They Can Crawl Into Your Ear, Lay Eggs, and The Babies Eat Your fucking Brain.                                                                                                                              C. Both Whats Wrong With You?                                                                                        D. Neither: I’m The Asshole Exception To The Rule.

 Brought To You By Les Sober

Written By: The University of Psychological Arts, The Synaptic Society,

& The Swedish Institute of Neuropsychology Research and Development.

 

Revised By: The Cerebral Studies Foundation & The Grey Matter Grant

Edited By: The Psychological Sociology Administration of Japan

Published By: InnerSelf Incorporated, Synaptic Storm,

& The Third Eye Institute for Developmental Cerebral Research.