Hello Everyone and Everybody,
My name is Justin Sane and I am excited to finally address everyone out there in FYB land, and i’m not sure where to start. This is one of those things you plan out in your head, and when the moment comes at last your brain goes blank so your left just standing there with your genitals in your hand. To get started here’s a basic run down of FYB for you.
The creative team: the who’s who of FYB
- Les Sober Founder FYB Inc. and Creative Director
- Justin Sane Les’s righthand, long time friend, and Director of Content
- Otto Rageous Les’ lefthand man, long time and Project Director
- Lady Les’ wife, better half, handler, guardian angel, confidant, best friend soulmate, consultant, advisor, and unofficial 4th member of the FYB Team.
- SpaceDog Les’s partner in crime, long time friend, and Content Contributor.
- N@P Les’s close friend, content contributor, and Creative consult.
- Coming soon!!! C-Nobody Les’s good friend, musician, creative consultant, and future content contributor.
What’s in a name?
The name thing actually started. Les, Otto,and I had a hardcore punk band called Stank breath. I can’t remember why exactly the reason we chose the name Stank Breath, but that’s high school freshmen boys for you. Since we were a punk band we all assumed stage names, and we have keep them for every artistic project since. The point is we want people to know our work not who we are. The point is Les isn’t the only paranoid introvert around these parts though he currently the local heavy weight champion, and will be defending the quad county championship belt next month in Muncie Indiana. Tickets on sale now $15 in advance $20 at the door. Doors open at 7 pm and the show starts at 8 pm Must be 21+ with valid proof of age for admittance is strictly enforced. Event is being held at the town’s local senior center use google maps for directions.
My 2 cents worth
The question of why I’m writing this now or why the hell am I here all of a sudden which is fare enough. FYB has been on an unplanned break due to circumstances mainly beyond our control. Some might say we are in some sort of “control”of situations when it comes to Les. Thats why I specifically stated for the record “mainly beyond our control” because have you ever tried to wrangle a fucking category 5 shitnado before?! It ain’t easy and damned near impossible.
To briefly recap Les is an extremely intense and some what emotionally unstable which makes him both a creative force to be reckoned with and an out of control asshole. Les has spent most of his life looking to master moderation so he could achieve some sort of balance in his chaotic existence. Les is a lot like moonshine in that as it ages Moonshine mellows as it becomes less abrasive and stronger with the passing of time. So if you meet Les and think he’s a motherfucking madman you can only imagine what dealing with him was like in the early days.
We collectively and in total agreement decided Les needed to try and take a break from everything in an attempt to keep him on the safer side of insanity. First off there was the hellishly busy and corrosively commercial holidays. What people including Les learned in 2020 is that getting a family together for a Zoom call in reality is actually harder to pull off than just gathering everyone in a group someplace. When you enter the Zoom universe you enter a suspended space and time continuum that is far more abstract is structure than that of the Physical realm or reality.
Unfortunately aside from the hell of the holidays a perfect fucking shitstorm has been brewing for several weeks in the land of Les recently. So it stay focused and on topic I’m going to paraphrase and use plenty of actual quotes from Les to give you a closer first hand view. The thing that you most likely notice is these are all things that SERIOUSLY Piss Les Off hence the perfect shitstorm scenario.
The Security Situation
Les has such high standards that the Lunatic can’t even live up to them. Thats right Les’s standards for People himself included are so High they are virtually unreachable. Its like dangling a carrot infant of a stubborn donkey to get it to walk. The donkey will never get the carrot but as long as it sees it hanging in mid air right in front of its face it remains obtainable as far as the donkey is concerned anyway. Customer service is a huge issue with Les who has gone on record making statements like :
- “Is it too goddamn much to ask some fucking idiot to do their fucking job?!”
- “They act like I’m bothering them, oh so fucking sorry for making you do the job you’re getting pain to fucking do in the first fucking place.”
- “Incompetent or Uncaring either fucking way they’re all a bunch of motherfucking fuckers.”
- “Apparently customer service is a dead industry and now asshole rule the fucking world.”
There was an issue with the FYB security system which I will not get into here as Les is already working feverishly on a Post about it with all the gritty details. Anyway the System was fucking up, Les spent 5 plus hours on the phone trying to remedy the problem with the alarm company, got so pissed that he switched alarm companies, and got a better deal. Even though Les is fond of saying “Alls well that ends well” he forgets to mention that in spite of the newer and far superior alarm system he will hold a grudge concerning how shitty the customer service of the original alarm company was. Les may not be able to carry a tune but he can carry a grudge for fucking YEARS.
Dealing with Les I am constantly reminded of my favorite scene from the movie From Dusk To Dawn. It’s the scene where the main characters have gained access to the Biker Bar and Harvey Keitel asks George Clooney’s character. Keitel’s character asks Clooney’s character if he is so stupid that he doesn’t know when he won. This is alluding to the fact while Clooney’s character’s plan is working and he’s hours away from being rich having escaped the authorities, but he’s willing to blow it all because he’s pissed at a Bar Patron for getting in his face. Thats Les in a nutshell. Sure the ordeal sucked like a $2 crack whore on a week long bender, yet as Les pointed out in the end he actually came out on top, but he rather focus on still being pissed about how it all went down even now that its over. Les I love you buddy but for Christ’s Sake LET IT GO LES JUST LET IT FUCKING GO BROTHER!!!
An apple a day keeps the doctors away….
Les is also been increasingly shitty due to his annual yearly doctor’s visit, and Les has let his contempt, disgust, and flat out hatred for all doctors (dentists included the sadistic fuckers) so no surprise he’s not a happy camper about having to see the doctor even if it is his. As Les has summed it up “Fuck doctors every fucking medical procedure is Painful or Uncomfortable, Costly, and usually rather embarrassing bordering on humiliating. Then all the greedy cocksuckers have to tell you is bad news followed by worse fucking news.”
See we all know doctors and all that shit sucks and the system sucks even worse, but we deal with it the best we can and life goes on. Not Les though he runs into a bump in the road and wants to fucking declare full blown fucking war on it. He becomes hyper focused to the point of obsession with destroying whatever is in his way or upset him. Les’s unofficial motto is “You fuck with me and I’ll fucking fuck you back 10 times over.” Les can be a truly vengeful son of a bitch. Its not good for his fucking health it fucking can’t be. I mean getting so stressed out or frustrated that you turn such a deep shade of red you look like the top of your fucking head is going to explode like a volcano. So at that point I mean your blood pressure has to be totally fucked up.
YouTube lands on Les’s shit list
As You are more than likely aware Les has been fucking Livid because Youtube recently changed their policies concerning age restricted content playing on 3rd party sites. Ever since it first took effect (Les was caught off guard because he doesn’t keep up on current tech shit or what big tech is up to) Les went APE SHIT. Once he “Calmed down” he was spitting venom like crazy about how big tech are greedy capitalism driven corporate whores who look at people as walking talking ATM machines. Les SHIT HAPPENS BROTHER. All Les wanted to do was find away to thwart YouTubes Policies, but Youtube just implemented these policies so if there is a way around them no one has figured it out yet. In the mean time all that we need to do is research other similar platforms until we find one that we can use or use to replace Youtube all together.
I mean I don’t get how the hell Les didn’t see this coming, and I’m sure he did he just wasn’t giving the situation his full undivided attention. Les knew things were changing because things always change, and it was when he was doing our most in-depth piece on GG Allin that Les discovered YouTube was pushing for more of their content to be on a buy or rent basis instead of free. Then Les was aware of YouTube going ballistic with the whole fucking monetization thing from increased advertising to YouTube taking a hefty cut of YouTuber’s profits. Then came the age restricted content deal which simply funnels more traffic to their site to the detriment of smaller 3rd party sites. It’s the usual case of the big dogs throwing their weight around to subjugate the little guy.
I mean this age restricted bullshit happened at the same time YouTube made its first major move into the streaming market with the ironically named YouTube TV. I get everyone wants a piece of the streaming pie, but YouTube streaming tv shows and shit just seems like a conflict of interest to me anyway. AGAIN LES IT IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD FUCK YOUTUBE AND LETS BE PROACTIVE INSTEAD OF REACTIVE!!!
Health insurance is hell
Lastly Les has been dealing with several different health insurance companies pertaining to prescription drug programs (we have no idea why though as of yet) and its not goin well. “Its going from the frying pan into the fire back into the frying pan and then back into the fire once again” as Les has put it. Apparently things with his health insurance weren’t to his liking so he’s been shopping around. To make things worse Les’s wife got shitty information and subpar assistance from a healthcare professional who helped her select her and Les’s new plan.
Due to the poor advice she signed up to a plan that turns out she wasn’t even happy with. There was all this fine print bullshit and they failed to send Les’s wife the proper paperwork in time for them to review it and use the opt out clause. Les is fucking furious and had repeatedly yelled “This is by far the shittiest fucking bullshit plan I have ever heard of it’s fucking pointless. You pay out your ass and get nothing in return its a fucking racket, a goddamn fucking scam.”
Les does have a point though in that the health insurance company your paying to protect you incase of illness or injury EMPLOY AN ENTIRE DEPARTMENT who’s job it is to thoroughly direct each and every customer claim ti find a way NOT TO PAY THE CLAIM. So when you see those fucking bullshit health insurance ads on tv remember they’ll gladly take your money while simultaneously trying to fuck you over.
So all in all Les will be returning shortly and has agreed to accept the help he know he could use, but refuses to ask for. As far as the future is concerned you’ll be hearing more from me along with Otto and some new Content Providers such as C-Nobody in 2021.
Sincerely,
Justin Sane 